North Korea

Alcoholism, it was reported. That's another possibility, actually: she died naturally, and because of her husband's disgrace, the Norks are sweeping her under the carpet rather than giving her a state funeral.

Park Geun-hye is "a crafty prostitute" "in thrall" to her "pimp Obama".

In another attempt to set a new low in international discourse, the Committee for the Peaceful Re-Unification of Korea called Park a "capricious whore" and likened her to "a mean, immature girl begging gangsters to beat up someone she doesn't like". They claim that, in joining Obama in criticizing a future North Korean nuclear test, Park "thus laid bare her despicable true colours as a wicked sycophant and traitor, a dirty comfort woman for the US and despicable prostitute selling off the nation."

They also criticized Obama for not postponing his trip due to the Sewol ferry sinking.

How charming.

A Vice article on North Korea's crystal meth problem. The country now produces it as an industry. Use is widespread in the countryside, where it is called "ice". Production of opium began during the 1990s to raise money for grain, but now the country has switched to crystal meth production.

Deliberately getting the populace hooked on crystal meth is a great betrayal of a government's obligation to look after them.

edited 27th Apr '14 5:51:32 AM by Achaemenid

North Korea has never upheld that obligation, so this is not surprising.

Makes sense. The Norks need their populace hooked on something since the bread and circuses of the past won't work. The South has blown past them economically.

This also makes fixing a failed North Korea difficult since now there will be thousands hooked on a drug who'd production would be in doubt. And any insurgency would be able to raise quick cash by selling meth.

Um....I don't know much about meth, but can't that stuff in particular kill very easily? Especially if not made well? Should we be expected possible mass death from a bad batch or just from regular usage?

edited 27th Apr '14 12:07:22 PM by FFShinra

Expert analysts believe the development came about after Dennis Rodman introduced Kim Jong-un to Netflix.

edited 27th Apr '14 12:55:26 PM by TheBatPencil

On Season 8 of Breaking Bad:

It turns out that Walt actually survived. But alas, he was kidnapped to North Korea under the order of Kim Jeong Un, a forced to make crystal meth for him.

Watch as he escapes North Korea and rebuild his meth empire all over Asia.

I never watched Breaking Bad, but I'd consider watching it if that happened.

With his former exchange student, Juche Pinkman.

Living Hell?

• North Korea News "Analysis" Deduces Life in the U.S. “Is a Living Hell”
• China plans for North Korean regime collapse leaked
• North Korea: Welcome to Kims’ world: An article about a trip to North Korea

Good links. Interesting about the Chinese plan. I wonder how it leaked; that could be a not so subtle hint to the North. On the other hand, the North might have a new sugar daddy - Vlad.

Re: North Korea criticizing US human rights - I reckon that's called "projecting".

edited 5th May '14 2:59:42 PM by Achaemenid

Is there a possibility of, in case NK implodes, Russia (or China) will take a bit of land for themselves?

Hard to say. Russia doesn't have its traditional excuse of "protecting Russian citizens" here, though if the opportunity is tempting enough they might move. China might seize a temporary buffer zone for themselves just south of the Yalu, probably to the furor of the Koreans, or they might play it sensible and refrain. If they do, though, there's a better than fair chance that the Chinese Army would have to learn counterinsurgency, which is nightmare fuel for planners across the world.

The plans are interesting and make sense, though. If the Chinese offer "protection" to NK leaders, presumably in a way that precludes refusal, it'd certainly make SK and the US furious, but it's a way to take the Kims out of the game and for China to save face. As satisfying as it'd be for the Kims to face a Korean jury, it may be easier for everyone involved if he disappeared into anonymity on the Chinese side of the border...that is, if he trusts his Chinese hosts and decides to play along, which may not be the case; still, it's better than most of his options.

edited 5th May '14 3:19:15 PM by SabresEdge

Either way, I wonder if there's (or might be) any under-the-table planning between China, South Korea and the US over the North?

I sincerely hope there is; it'd make crisis management that much easier. North Korea is one of those few places where China, the US, and South Korea have some serious incentives to work together, or at least agree to disagree on what might happen. For instance, I can't see South Korea demanding anything less than custody-then-trial for the NK upper echelon, whereas China would be happy to have them disappear quietly. The US would be best served acting as a neutral mediator in that case.

Plus, given what'd happened in 1950, common sense dictates that should anything happen, the US needs to consult with China beforehand before it comes too close to the Yalu, possibly with no-attack-lines drawn up. There need to be detailed plans drawn up so that the Norks don't provoke some overzealous USMC regimental commander into sparking a diplomatic incident with China by coming too close to the border in pursuit of an NK raiding battalion.

Seriously, one hopes that there is.

'd dammit!

edited 5th May '14 3:36:17 PM by KnightofLsama

The key here is that North Korea keeps the South, Japan and the US at bay. If North goes south expect:

• The US being forced to foot a lot of the costs.

• Not territory, but lots of Nork officers, officials and VIP's to seek "asylum" in China or Russia.

• Calls for the US to leave South Korea.

If Russia is offering some kind of aid to the Norks, it's to stick a finger in Uncle Sam's eye. A stronger North means the US Pacific Command is tied up.

Which fits Russia's new MO of getting up in NATO's business again.

The mystery is what China might be up to. China doesn't want chaos on its border as its primary goal, and I think that if it can officially stay on its side of the Yalu it will—no sense wasting Chinese lives when the Koreans and the Americans will do it for them. Also, China may well arrange for asylum and quiet retirements for some of the regime higher-ups; I think that China can be more or less trusted to grab them and then stay quiet about it, whereas Russia may opt for the route of publicly taunting the US with them.

Russia won't get more involved than the Chinese. For one, Beijing won't allow it and for another, Russia wouldn't want to absolve China of the liabilities.

Still leads a lot of room for fucking around with Japan and SK and the US though.

The article about Russia writing of $10 billion of North Korean debt says that Russia is planning a gas pipeline to South Korea - through North Korea. So that's probably what they expect to get in return for their money. (Well, to the extent that a debt that would probably never be paid back can be called "money".)

That gas line would probably be destroyed by North Korea if there was to be a war. I also wouldn't put it past the North to steal gas running through that line.

I'm sure the Russians will keep an eye on it — and in the event of War, protect the pipeline...

Oh! Oh! I know! You know the time-honored "we're just protecting Russian people living there?" Well, in this case, they'd have "we're protecting Russian investments and Russian property!"

North Korea would also not be likely to steal Russian gas...I'm sure part of the agreement would be some kind of gas subsidy. Whatever they take extra would then get subtracted from their legit supply with no cost incurred on Seoul.

Russia has complained that Belarusian and Ukrainian people have been stealing from the gas pipes running through those countries - and I think I saw a report somewhere that said there had been an independent investigation and Russia's claims were correct. In those countries the people stealing gas were apparently just ordinary people who didn't want to (or couldn't) pay for the gas so they managed to steal it somehow.

If normal people can steal from a gas pipeline in Belarus I'd expect they might be able to do it in North Korea, as well. Well, I don't know how you steal from a gas pipeline so I don't know what sort of equipment and skills you'd need. It sounds vaguely plausible, though.

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