Uh, hey everyone! Here's another tutorial for you, from the Game Helpin' Squad.
—Josh Hallwax, World Quester 2
A web series started in 2009 by Cody Johnston, comprised of walkthroughs to the worst games you've ever seen, but which you can thankfully never play.
A few episodes
were exclusive to Cracked, but have since been removed from the site, and aren't recoverable through the Internet Archive. These can be considered lost media.
List of videos
- World Quester 2
- Severe Running
- Time Travel Understander
- Burgers And Guns
- Commanders Of Siege Force
- Pretend Everything (lost)
- Moonkisser: Dusking Midnight
- Solitaire Party
- Pretend Gas Station
- Recite Pi (lost)
- ChronoChores
- Space Quester 3 (lost)
- A Pissed Off Tutorial For Google Wave (features characters from Game Helpin' Squad, and is in Cody's Game Helpin' Squad playlist)
What you want to do is read the examples, but not in alphabetical order, because that will open your Space Inventory:
- Accent Upon The Wrong Syllable: In Pat's playthrough of Time Travel Understander: "This will levitate your first time shadow and slow down all your subSEquent and SUBsequent time shadows."
- Artificial Stupidity: At difficulty 10 of Solitaire Party, the AI, even at its highest difficulty, has no idea what's going on. It's hard to blame it for this.
- Callback: Several to the Space Inventory introduced in World Quester 2.
- One of the many dialogue options in Commanders of Siege Force is "Open Space Inventory".
- Josh has to leave in Solitaire Party because his Space Inventory is opening.
- Voting in the Pretend Election in Pretend Gas Station requires you to download the Sentient Programmed Application for Calculating Extensive and Necessary Votes (Entity of Non-sentience, Totally Objective and Reliable, Yeah!" Voting System, AKA the "S.P.A.C.E. I.N.V.E.N.T.O.R.Y." Voting System. (Josh doesn't fall for it.)
- Calvinball: Soltaire Party goes from being an extremely simple game of "put the card in the marked pile" or "which of these cards is bigger" to this, once difficulty 10 is selected. Even the bots are too confused by it, and forfeit the game.
- Fictional Video Game: Every game covered in the series. Many are based on existing games; for example, Time Travel Understander is a parody of Braid, with mechanics similar to The Company of Myself and Chronotron.
- Funny Background Event: The chat in Time Travel Understander, which is affected by Pat manipulating time in the game, and the AI chat in Solitaire Party.
- Game-Breaking Bug: In World Quester 2, opening the Space Inventory at all crashes your computer, and you have to avoid the many shortcuts and bizarre in-game mechanics that open your Space Inventory.
- Loads and Loads of Loading: Burgers and Guns - despite being a text adventure. In the time it takes to load, Josh decides he doesn't want to play it anymore.
- Lock and Key Puzzle: The least nonsensical mechanic in Time Travel Understander. Except, of course, you have to use the key's time shadow on the door, and the key on the door's time shadow.
- Moon Logic Puzzle: World 1 Stage 1 Level 1 Part 1 of Time Travel Understander. And it probably doesn't get much better from there.Pat: The creator of the game, Jimothy Lacek, has said repeatedly that if you can't figure out what you're doing in the game, you're just not thinking in the right way.
- Misbegotten Multiplayer Mode: Multiplayer in Solitaire Party. (Think about it.) It's entirely asynchronous, with seemingly the only player interaction being through the chat, though the game immediately ends if all but one player forfeit.
- Permadeath: When you fall over in Severe Running, a dialogue box pops up prompting you to "Restart Entire Game" or "Quit".
- Running Gag:
- The Space Inventory in World Quester 2. It's very important that you don't open it, or trigger any of the shortcuts to open it. It crashes the game and blue-screens your computer.
Josh: God dammit. GOD DAMMI-- The pop-ups for the Pretend Election in Pretend Gas Station.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: In Time Travel Understander, after finagling around to cause a time paradox and then reversing time, the enemy plants... give up.
- Suddenly Shouting: Josh, at the end of World Quester 2, after the Space Inventory crashes his computer.
- Timed Mission: On difficulty 10 of Solitaire Party, revealing a tarot card as your bottom stacker gives you 30 seconds to win, or else all your cards get added back to your hand.
