Only the Brave Can Rescue the Kidnapped Princess (released as The Mystery of the Missing Princess in the United States) is a game developed by Omnimedia and released in 1997.
The plot centers around a royal family in a medieval setting. One day, while the King and Queen and their servants are having dinner, they discover that the Princess Abigail has gone missing, prompting them to embark on a quest to rescue her.
The game is divided into two major segments. The first has you explore the castle, vacated by its inhabitants, as Lucky, a talking duck belonging to the royal family. As Lucky, you're tasked by Muggins the wizard with finding various objects and locations hidden throughout the castle by. After finding one such object, you're given a portion of the "main story" of the game, where you guide the royal entourage on their journey to rescue Abigail.
This game contains examples of:
- Adipose Rex: The King's defining character trait is his insatiable gluttony, and he proudly sings about his servants having to patch several sheets together to make a shirt that just barely fits him and install scaffolding under his horse's chest.
- Muggins: Of course, food has always been the King's strongest point.
- Affectionate Nickname: Abigail refers to Sir Longsword as "Smudger," who in turn refers to her as "Bunnysnap," to the Queen's exasperation.
- All for Nothing: As it turns out, the journey to Castle Blackheart was pointless, because the Princess was back at the King and Queen's castle the whole time.
- All Trolls Are Different: A green, bearded troll appears in the marketplace, refusing to let the party pass through until they get him a random pair of items.
- Anachronism Stew: The game takes place in a medieval setting, but things such as microwaves, refrigerators, various modern-day food items, Thanksgiving, sunglasses, dentists, credit cards, baseball, football, chainsaws, and televisions are all mentioned or shown to exist.
- Animated Armor: A suit of armor can be found in the castle. Having Lucky interact with it reveals it to be sentient.
- Ash Face: The player can prompt Lucky to examine a cannon which then fires in his face, resulting in this.
- Babies Ever After: Abigail and Longsword are shown to have two children in the ending montage.
- Bird-Poop Gag: In the marketplace, the king can interact with a man who offers to sell him a sprig of heather for good luck. The king irritably tells him that he doesn't need luck, which is immediately followed by a bird crapping on his shoulder.
- Black Comedy Cannibalism: One verse in "I Love My Food" has the King blithely recount a time when the royal cook told him for a dare that they were out of food, to which he responded by chasing her around the castle with a "ravenous look" on his face.
- Bring My Brown Pants: When Abigail is found, after Longsword's attempt to escape the room by telling the others that he has to use the bathroom fails and the Queen starts becoming suspicious of him, he remarks that he "definitely [needs] to go to the bathroom now."
- Catapult to Glory: At one point, the group is forced to use a catapult—or a mangonel, as it's referred to in the game—to launch themselves into the top of a tower.
- Deadpan Snarker:
- Muggins demonstrates a very dry sense of humor throughout the game, mostly directed towards the King.
- Lucky the Duck gets off his share of wisecracks as well, usually when the player instructs him to do something really inane.Lucky: Genius! Under the table. Now where would I hide? A whole castle at my disposal, and sure, under the table! That's where I'd hide! Not.
- Distinction Without a Difference: When the group is in the dungeon, Sir Longsword's reluctance to proceed leads to this exchange:The King: You're frightened!Sir Longsword: Well, no, not fear, exactly, more... terror. Sheer, absolute terror.
- Dull Surprise: The King's vocal delivery during "I Love My Food" is very lively and expressive. The animation that accompanies the song, on the other hand, mostly consists of him either staring at the camera with a completely emotionless expression or dancing with a bored one.
- Establishing Character Moment: The King is introduced explosively belching before rudely asking the Queen about his supper.
- Everybody Do the Endless Loop: The King's dancing during the "I Love My Food" scene consists of him repeatedly going through a short looped animation while his character model moves back and forth in a way that doesn't sync up with the dancing at all.
- Exposition Fairy: Muggins explains the game's controls to the player at the beginning and also gives them instructions for the rest of it.
- Eye of Newt: A few of the lines in "Magic" are devoted to Muggins detailing the sort of ingredients used in a spell.Slimy snails and horses' tailsAdd a bit of human spitThen some stagnant water, tooBoil it up and watch it brew
- Fake Mystery: As it turns out, Princess Abigail wasn't kidnapped — she had been at the King's castle the whole time.
- Fat Bastard: The King is a gluttonous boor who acts incredibly rudely towards others. He's also apparently very fond of having people beheaded; his usual response to someone angering him is to threaten to have the offending party's head lopped off, with even his own wife being subject to these threats (although he may not intend to actually make good on them).
- Feather Fingers: Lucky's wings are regularly seen forming what resembles a hand.
- Fetch Quest: At one point, the party runs into a troll who refuses to let them pass until they get him a random pair of items.
- Giving Someone the Pointer Finger: The Queen is fond of making this gesture, usually at the King.
- I Need to Go Iron My Dog: During the ending, when the Queen begins asking Abigail where she was, and Longsword suddenly tries to leave the room.
- Sir Longsword: I'd, uh... I'd better go take off this silly armor. Besides, I... I think I need the, uh, bathroom.
- Informed Attribute: The troll at the market is described as a "truly horrid beast" by Muggins, but all he does is stand in the party's way and make them fetch things for him.
- Let's Duet: "Our Love is Blind," sung between Abigail and Sir Longsword.
- Leitmotif: A melody which can be heard in the first line of "I Love My Food" is associated with the King.
- Lovable Coward: Sir Longsword's character in a nutshell. His main character trait is his fearful personality, but he's still a sympathetic character.
- Names to Run Away from Really Fast: The man who kidnapped Princess Abigail (allegedly, at least) is named Lord Blackheart. Parodied in that his castle appears on a map as a castle with a literal black heart shape surrounding it.
- No Name Given: The names of the King and Queen are never revealed.
- Odd Job Gods: Sir Longsword is a knight of the order of Saint Hilda, the patron saint of abandoned hedgehogs.
- Oddly Small Organization: Longsword is the King's only knight, though the reason for that is the King fired the rest as he felt they were unnecessary for 'today's civilized society'. However, Jonathan and Muggins are the only other castle staff seen in the game and the Queen is said to be the one who cooks for the King.
- Ode to Food: "I Love My Food," sung by the King about his love for fattening foods.
- Officially Shortened Title: The game refers to itself as merely The Kidnapped Princess.
- Parental Love Song: "Sometimes," sung by the Queen about Princess Abigail.
- Precision F-Strike:
- When discussing the location of Castle Blackheart, the King angrily asks "where's the bloody castle?"
- During "I Don't Want to Go Down There," Longsword likens the dungeon the song is about to an "entrance to Hell."
- Prehensile Hair: Muggins uses his long mustaches to point to things and hold items.
- Quacking Up: Lucky is a wisecracking duck who provides a generous amount of zany humor.
- The Reveal: Abigail wasn't kidnapped by Lord Blackheart. The whole time, she was at the castle the plot started in. The kidnapping was faked by her and Longsword in an attempt to elope.
- Rhymes on a Dime: Jonathan the Page speaks entirely in rap lyrics which are accompanied by music.
- Road Apples: The player can prompt Lucky to jump into a horse's stall, which leads to him getting covered in horse dung to his disgust and the horse's embarrassment.
- Save the Princess: As the title of the game would suggest, the core plot of the game revolves around the King, the Queen, and their allies embarking on a quest to rescue Princess Abigail.
- Shout-Out:
- A horse whose stable Lucky can enter is apparently named Silver.
- During "Magic," Muggins mentions rabbit's fur as an ingredient used in magic, prompting a voice similar to that of Bugs Bunny to say "Eh, what's up doc?"
- Took a Level in Kindness: During the ending montage, the King is noted to mellow out and become kinder as he gets older, even getting Muggins a present at one point.
- Wacky Sound Effect: Every move Lucky makes is accompanied by cartoonish sound effects.
- Wheel o' Feet: Often done by Lucky.
- You ALL Look Familiar: Most of the merchants in the market look the exact same aside from their clothes, hair, and skin color.
Isn't there any more?
