Recap / M*A*S*H S2 E5: Dr. Pierce and Mr. Hyde

Hawkeye Pierce is a truly dedicated surgeon, but sometimes he can be a little too dedicated.

After yet another marathon OR session, Hawkeye and Trapper return to the Swamp for some much-needed sleep, but Radar's announcement that no wounded are expected for at least 24 hours is Instantly Proven Wrong. Hawkeye, despite having been performing surgery for twenty straight hours, goes straight back into OR, despite Trapper and Henry telling him to get some sleep and Frank and Margaret suggesting that his performance in OR may be slipping. Once they are finished in OR, Radar tries to take Hawkeye back to the Swamp, but he hears more choppers arriving, and Hawkeye, musing on the wonders of running on pure adrenaline, pushes Radar aside and heads back to perform more surgeries.

That night, rather than finally going to sleep, Hawkeye wanders around in a daze, suddenly consumed with questions about why the Korean War started. Trapper isn't interested, so he goes to Radar and asks him to send a telegram to Harry S. Truman saying "Who's responsible? Affectionately, A Dissatisfied Customer." The next day, he pleads with chopper pilot O'Brien not to go up that day, since whenever he does, he comes back with wounded soldiers. O'Brien humours him, but more wounded arrive anyway, and Hawkeye's adrenal glands kick in as he heads back into OR yet again.

A furious Henry orders Hawkeye to stand down once and for all, but instead of going to sleep, he continues searching for answers as to how the war started, even voluntarily attending an orientation lecture by Frank for the latest batch of enlisted men. When Frank says the Communists envy the American way of life and that half of them have never even seen a bathroom, Hawkeye decides to send the North Koreans a picture of the officers' latrine with an offer to bring them the genuine article if they'll stop the fighting. Meanwhile, General Clayton has heard about the telegram to Truman and is on his way to the 4077th to investigate.

By this point, Trapper, with Radar's help, is actively trying to sedate Hawkeye, but their first attempt knocks Frank out instead, and their second attempt takes so long to work that Hawkeye still has time to hitch the latrine to an ambulance and start towing it out of the compound... with General Clayton inside it. But he only gets a few hundred yards before he finally falls asleep, and as they watch over him, Trapper and Henry wax philosophical about taking the first latrine out of the war.

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Attention, attention! Captain Pierce has been ordered to presently forego the following tropes and get some sleep:

• Actually Pretty Funny:
  • Henry cracks up at Hawkeye wanting Margaret's body.
  • Some of the nurses find Hawkeye's sleepy and exhausted mood hilarious.
• Armor-Piercing Question: "Somebody, and it wasn't you or me, started this war. Now, who was it? It isn't Pearl Harbor, we already had one of those. I gotta find out who started it."
• Blatant Lies: Trapper and Henry tell Hawkeye to get some sleep and let them worry about the new batch of wounded soldiers being brought in. He claims he's just looking.
  Hawkeye: That kid's got chest wounds. I can spot it a mile off.
  Henry: Terrific. Your eyes are perfect.
• Captain Obvious: A dark and slightly disturbing case with Hawkeye.
  Hawkeye: Something funny is happening around here and I'm finally beginning to notice it. For the past couple of days, I've been making some very careful observations. [beat] There's a war going on here.
  [Trapper tries to go back to sleep. Hawkeye jostles him awake]
  Hawkeye: People walking around with guns. Uniforms. Dozens of bodies coming in by helicopter. And without exception, every one of them is mangled in some way. Don't you see, it all adds up? There's guns, uniforms, wounded bodies.
  Trapper: You figured that out, huh?
  Hawkeye: I'm beginning to see a pattern.
  Trapper: Why don't you go to sleep? You're turning into a 170-pound fruitcake.
• Covered in Mud: A passing Jeep splatters Hawkeye and Trapper's legs with mud.
  • An extra slips over the muddy road when there's more incoming wounded.
• Deadpan Snarker:
  • Hawkeye forgets he's already finished with a patient, to Trapper's incredulity:
    Trapper: What are you doing?
    Hawkeye: Somebody took my patient.
    Trapper: You finished him.
    Hawkeye: Well where's the next one? Let's go! Give me another case! I'm on a winning streak here!
  • Hawkeye talks about how badly he wants to get to sleep:
    Hawkeye: I never wanted to get to bed so bad in my whole life. [pauses] Wait a second, I take that back. There was a nurse in med school. When I put my ear to her navel, I could hear the ocean.
    Trapper: Some night.
    Hawkeye: Before that, it was some day. Before that, it was some night.
    Trapper: Well, you kept taking all the chest cases like you were their only hope.
    Hawkeye: Oh you're right. I keep forgetting what wonders Mercurochrome can do.
  • Hawkeye treats his bed as a real person before his first attempt at getting some sleep:
    Hawkeye: Hello, bed. This is Captain Pierce. Can you hear me? I'm coming in, bed.
  • Trapper does a serious one when he sees Hawkeye's dedication starting to rise beyond a normal level.
    Trapper: Hey, you've been carving for twenty straight hours. Even Albert Schweitzer takes a break.
  • Although his concerns are noted, Henry replies to Frank's question about the sleep-deprived Hawkeye being at the operating table in this way.
    Frank: [elbowing Henry, who is holding a hypodermic needle] Henry?
    Henry: [squirts the contents of the hypodermic into the air] Yeah?
    Frank: What's he doing in here?
    Henry: Gee, I don't know, Frank. He's a doctor. Maybe somebody's sick.
    Frank: I've been asleep three times while he's gone on operating. You know what that means?
    Hawkeye: Yeah, you're Sleepy, and I always thought you were Dopey. You're certainly not Doc.
  • When Frank gives up, Margaret feels the need to continue. Hawkeye of course keeps up the snarking.
    Margaret: What that means, Colonel, is that this man is probably operating below par.
    Hawkeye: Nonsense, I've had six holes in one. Get it? Six holes in one? Some gallows humor to relieve the tremendous pressure. I must have your body.
  • Hawkeye is trying to take photos of something offscreen but Radar is standing in the way.
    Hawkeye: I can't take your picture now, Radar. Come back later and we'll get a pony and do it right.
    Radar: I've been looking all over for ya.
    Hawkeye: You can even ride the pony when we're finished.
• Delayed Reaction: Trapper successfully manages to give Hawkeye a sedative on his second try by putting it in a glass of gin. To his and Radar's shock, it doesn't seem to affect Hawkeye at all.
  Radar: When's he gonna fall down?
  Trapper: I don't know. Rasputin swallowed a whole drugstore and didn't even belch.
• Description Cut: Hawkeye comes looking for Frank, believing he's in Margaret's tent. A surprisingly calm Margaret reminds him that Frank usually holds an orientation lecture every Friday afternoon. The scene cuts to said lecture.
• Determinator: No matter what, no matter how tired he is, Hawkeye Pierce puts his patients first. That is precisely the problem.
• Dramatically Delayed Drug: Hawkeye is suffering from extreme sleep deprivation and a nasty case of Exhaustion-Induced Idiocy that has inspired him to send the officer's latrine to North Korea. Trapper and Radar give Hawkeye a heavy dose of tranquilizers to stop him... but they don't kick in until after the visiting General has taken a seat in said latrine and Hawkeye has started towing it away with an ambulance. Trapper later tells Col. Blake that Hawkeye got a good 400 yards before the drugs took effect and he finally fell asleep.
• Exact Words: A sleep-deprived Hawkeye takes one of Frank's metaphors literally, causing him to come to the conclusion that they can end the war by sending a latrine to North Korea.
• Exhaustion-Induced Idiocy: Hawkeye has been operating for so long that he is unable to sleep. Among his exhaustion-induced ideas are shipping a latrine to North Korea and sending a telegram to President Truman reading "Who's responsible?".
• Failed Future Forecast: Radar said at the beginning of the episode that there would not be any casualties or 24 hours. It couldn't have been more than ten minutes.
• Historical Domain Character: Doesn't appear in person, but Hawkeye has a telegram written and sent to Harry Truman, then President of the United States.
• The Insomniac: I think we're playing a game of Captain Obvious here.
• Insane Troll Logic: In a rare case that's heart-wrenching rather than humorous, Hawkeye, half out of his mind from exhaustion, goes to chopper pilot O'Brien with an observation: every time O'Brien goes up in his chopper, he comes back bearing wounded kids. So, Hawkeye reasons, if O'Brien stops going out, there won't be any wounded, and the war will stop. O'Brien humors Hawkeye for a moment, and Hawkeye is satisfied, until more wounded come in anyway and he has to go back to work.
• Literary Allusion Title: After Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
• Mood Whiplash: Hawkeye goes from a teary-eyed rendition of "I'll Be Home For Christmas" straight into singing "Der Fuhrer's Face".
• Oh, Crap!:
  • Henry is informed General Clayton is coming to the 4077, is as mad as hell, and coming to find out who did it. Henry first makes a Reflexive Response and walks into his office, does an off-screen Double Take and comes right back out.
    Radar: Message from General Clayton. He's mad as hell and is coming down here to find out who did it.
    Henry: You can hardly blame him.
    Radar: Yes sir.
    [beat]
    Henry: Coming down here to find out who did what?
    Radar: Someone sent a telegram to President Truman.
    Henry: A telegram? To President Harry S. Truman? That president?
  • Radar goes into full-fledged panic when General Clayton is about to enter the latrine Hawkeye is about to drag away to give to the North Koreans.
• Red Scare: The subject of Frank's lecture.
  Frank: We're here to keep the peace, to keep the enemy back behind the 38th parallel where they came from, or else, they'll spread down Korea, turn left and the next thing we know, they'll be marching down Main Street U.S.A.
• Sanity Slippage: Hawkeye suffers this when his lack of sleep catches up with him. It gets worse the more he goes without it.
• Standard Snippet: In one particularly memorable scene, Hawkeye sings a few lines from "I'll Be Home for Christmas" and "Der Fuhrer's Face".
• What the Hell, Hero?:
  • Henry lets Hawkeye have it when he operated in the O.R. against orders.
    Henry: Listen, Pierce. You were ordered to stand down.
    Hawkeye: I did, but I fell up again.
    [...]
    Henry: You've gone against orders, Pierce. Somebody else could have operated.
    Hawkeye: I asked the kid to sit in the waiting room, but he read all of our magazines.
    Henry: I'm gonna be frank with you, Pierce.
    Hawkeye: You're gonna be Frank [Burns] with me?
    Henry: I mean blunt.
    Hawkeye: Oh, that's good. Otherwise Frank would try to be Henry with me and I don't think I could stand that.
    Henry: You pay close attention. Can you understand what I'm saying?
    Hawkeye: Why? Is there something wrong with your mouth?
    Henry: No, I'm fine! The problem is you've been on 24-hour call three nights this week!
    Hawkeye: Three times twenty four...
    Henry: Look, Doctor, no matter what comes in, I'm putting you to bed.
  • Henry gets nervous about General Clayton coming to find out who sent the telegram to President Truman. Radar tells him he knew it was Hawkeye all along.
    Henry: How do you know?
    Radar: Uh, I sent it.
    [Henry slaps his hand down on his desk]
    Henry: Well, why didn't ya tell me?

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