A Recap page for Bruva Alfabusa's Hunter: The Parenting. Here be spoilers.
Arc One
Episode 1: Adorable Family Trip
Norfolk, England, 2006. A family of five travels at night under a golden moon in their trusty bus: Big-D, monster hunter extraordinaire and batshit insane man; his sons, nerdy and sarcastic Marckus plus stern and serious Door; Kitten, Marckus' fiancé and Boy, Door's son. After stopping, Kitten reveals to the group that Big-D brought them to a "Ghost Walk" through one of the many haunted places dotting Norfolk. Marckus grimly notes that several active missing persons cases are linked to the place where they stand while Big-D is overjoyed at the thought of Boy facing terrors for the first time to build character.
Once in the woods, Kitten and Marckus joke about the local village of Cockthorpe, and Kitten tells the tale of a tunnel dug between several local villages and a priory, as well as rumors of a black-clad monk appearing in said priory and the legend of a fiddler who explored the tunnel while playing his instrument so folk aboveground could follow him... Until he stopped playing and was never seen again, but it's said one can still sometimes hear the fiddle. A few minutes later, following Marckus' complaining and Boy getting scared over a branch, the group finds one of the entrances of the tunnel Kitten described. And promptly goes down said tunnel.
[Interlude describing how Boy is super-strong due to his meat and fat-heavy diet and explaining how Kitten and Marckus got together following an intense LAN party]
Once in the tunnel, the group finds traces that it is inhabited, Big-D decides to split up the group as it's "spookier". Boy and Door bump into a picnic table, causing Door to give up on the exploration in order to measure the table. Left to his own devices, Boy spots something in the dark before he and Door are attacked by deformed people, but an acetylene torch to the face courtesy of Marckus and a flintlock shot from Door makes them back off. Kitten identifies them as vampires as well as their (inaccurate) types : "Sludge Lad" Pyotr note , "Humanimal" Ape note , "Bikerbro Blank" Shitbeard note and "Vampire Wizard" Kevin note . After pointing how wrong Kitten is, Pyotr decides to attack. A short but intense battle follows and sees the Hunters managed to defeat three of the vampires and criticize Marckus' "stake-jacket"... Before noticing that Kevin has taken Big-D hostage at knifepoint.
Kevin, being a "Vampire Wizard", uses his Dominate magic to pin the group down before gloating, stabbing, and starting to devour Big-D, who promptly reveals that he is currently absolutely fucked on DMT (something he totally did plan), befuddling Kevin and breaking his Dominate spell. The vampire starts casting again, but the Hunters manage to avoid being caught again by wearing sunglasses and screaming loudly; Kevin fails to concentrate enough to Dominate them and gets staked as a result. Loading the vampires in their bus, Big-D declares he wants to keep Kevin to himself for interrogation while Marckus can study the rest of them; something that doesn't please Kitten as the group uses his house as a base of operations. After announcing he's got ayahuasca tea at home and loading up on more DMT, Big-D drives away with the group with a black-clad figure playing a fiddle observes the bus leaving.\\\
Episode 2: If The Vampires Had A Tortured Wrestling Match
After defeating the vampires in the tunnels, the group takes them back to Kitten's house to interrogate them. Kevin is locked in a room upstairs to be interrogated by Big D, while Shitbeard, Ape, and Pyotr are put into cages in the basement for Marckus, Kitten, Door, and Boy to interrogate and experiment on. The vampires start by attempting to call the hunters out on their indifference to vampire life, but the Hunters rebuff them by reminding them that they're predators who feed on humans and that killing them is entirely justifiable when you take that into account. Door is particularly unsympathetic towards them, saying that to let them live would be tantamount to abetting genocide, and coldly telling them that he "can't kill a corpse.
The three vampires explain that they're part of the Sabbat, a sect of vampires who believe themselves to be the rightful inheritors of the earth and servants of Caine, the First Vampire. They wish to tear down the Camarilla and assert their places as rulers of the world, reducing humans to mere livestock. They offer the Hunters a chance to join them, but Marckus turns it down, gleefully declaring them all to be "vampire fascists" and saying that they can now do whatever they want to them and it will be morally justified. Boy is nervous to leave the Vampires in the house, but Door reassures him by informing him that he personally reinforced the basement and that the door can withstand forces of 18,000 pounds per square inch.
[Interlude explaining how Big D has many Ex-husbands and Ex-wives and Ex-children, and that his favorite amongst them is the horse named "Horse". Also explaining that Kitten serves as a stabilizing influence for Boy and that they play "Deffmatch" together every Wednesday]
The hunters go upstairs and decide to see what will happen if the vampires eat each other, and remotely let them out of their cages and tell them that they can go ahead and fight among themselves to see who becomes dinner for the others. Ape and Shitbeard get into a vicious fight while the Kitten, Door, and Marckus all commentate on it like it was a wrestling match. Pyotr, meanwhile, turns invisible and hides from their camera, waiting for an opportune moment to strike. Ape manages to defeat Shitbeard and is about to drain him dry when Pyotr suddenly ambushes him and, after a moment of false reassurance, viciously beats him to death, deeply disturbing Marckus and Kitten with his brutality.
Following this, Big D enters the room and, upon realizing what Kitten, Marcus, and Door have done, immediately freaks out and tells them that they should never allow vampires to "diablerise" each other. As he's yelling at Marckus, there is a loud crash and Big D realizes that Pyotr has broken out of the reinforced cellar, and they're now trapped in the house with a terrifyingly strong, totally invisible, extremely sadistic monster of a vampire.\\\
Episode 3: Hunter's Hunters Hunted
Faced with a massively-empowered Pyotr, the hunters decide to run for it. Marckus decides to jump for it, reasoning that Pyotr is an ambush predator and that forcing him to confront them in a wide-open space will give them an advantage. Unfortunately, because they're on the second story, Marckus breaks his ankles when he lands and is rendered unable to move. Door throws him a gun but an accidental discharge injures Marckus even further.
Door has Kitten close the door to the room that they're all in so that Pyotr can't enter without them knowing and decides to cut a hole in the wall so that they can exit out onto the carport and climb down from there, and then get into the car and escape. Big D volunteers to help Door, but he is yanked out of the window by Pyotr before he can get a chance. Realizing that Pyotr is on the outside walls of the house, Door abandons his plan and rushes downstairs with Boy, ordering Kitten to help Big D while he getbs some old mining equipment.
Kitten makes it to the Carport only to be nearly hit by his car when Pyotr throws it at him. He barely avoids being seriously injured and realizes that Pyotr is trying to bait him into running down the hallway. After confirming his suspicions by throwing a boot down the hall (which is caught by Pyotr), Kitten attempts to escape through the car but falls into a trap hole that Pyotr had dug in the carport. A massively Hulked-Out Pyotr taunts him, but Kitten manages to clamber out of the hole and escape Pyotr. He then runs to the shed and grabs some stilts.
Kitten seemingly tries to abandon the rest of the hunters by using the stilts to make a break for Big D's double-decker bus while Pyotr repeatedly stomps on Marckus's head and taunts Kitten about him running away. Kitten responds by viciously deconstructing Pyotr's personality, calling him a coward and a wimp, reminding him how he went down like a punk at their earlier confrontation, and that his only real skill is to hide with his invisibility and wait for the others to do the work for him. Pyotr is sufficiently enraged by this and kicks Marckus across the lawn, breaking Kitten's stilts and slamming them both into the side of the bus. He then starts walking towards them... when he steps on a landmine.
[Interlude explaining how and when the members of the Lick (sans Kevin) were all Embraced, and then explaining how the Sabbat are, in reality, usually people forced into a war that they don't truly understand.]
Turns out, Door used to work with explosives (his "mining" work) and that he has turned the entirety of Kitten's front lawn into a minefield. Unfortunately, while the explosion blew one of Pyotr's legs off it was not enough to kill him, and his leg is already regenerating. Enraged by this, Pyotr moves to attack Kitten and Marckus, but is stopped by Door, dressed in EOD armor, who taunts Pyotr, calling him "prey." He further taunts Pyotr, informing him that even if he can leap over the minefield, Door could still shoot him with his pistol, and reminding Pyotr that he has "an eternity" to lose if he's killed.
Pyotr responds by using the shovel to throw up a cloud of dirt to obscure Door's line of sight, which sets off another landmine. Door fires blindly at Pyotr but misses. Pyotr throws his shovel, stunning Door. He then leaps towards Door but is shot out of midair by Boy, who was hiding off to the side and armed with a pistol of his own. Pyotr lands on another landmine and is grievously wounded, whimpering that he doesn't want to die before he passes out.
Kitten and Marckus are joined by Door, Big D, and Boy who sit next to them, reflecting on the victory as the sun rises and Pyotr burns to ashes. Kitten rescinds his objections to the landmines in his front yard. Door offers to bake Boy a cake with any flavor of meat that he wants and invites Marckus to come with him to the shooting range sometime. Kitten suggests calling some ambulances so that they can get treated for their wounds, something that everyone is in favor of except Big D. Kitten then remembers that he has a house alarm that automatically calls 999, in the event of an emergency, and a police car pulls up to the house as the cast suddenly realizes that they have some serious explaining to do.
And Pyotr ends up in Hell to be tortured by one of the worst fiends in history: a giant Karl The Deranged.
Audiologs
Kitten and Big-D's Primer on the Supernatural and Local Folklore
- Canon, right after Adorable Family Trip
The morning following their Ghost Walk, Kitten starts preparing breakfast before Big-D tries to run him over with a sword, thinking he's the landlord (which he techinically is since the house they live in belongs to Kitten). The misunderstanding dissipated, Big-D and his son-in-law start chatting about how everybody likes their food, or mostly alternating between mocking Marckus' Picky Eater tendencies and confessing how much they love him while Big-D asks his son-in-law to cook his signature breakfast omelette, including but not limited to duck eggs, milk (unpasteurized since, as Big-D says himself, Pasteur was part of the New World Order), rice, sulfur, chloride, carbon rods, lots of garlic powder and a sauce made of tomato sauce, honey, water, sauerkraut, ketchup, tonkatsu and a bit of RBMK nuclear reactor graphite "to taste". While cooking, Big-D waxes philosophical about how Earth and the world as a whole is large before he asks Kitten to tell him about the Great Yarmouth area folklore to prod if any of the local legends are mere tall tales or really caused by supernatural beings. After Big-D claims that the "water" at Yarmouth's Pirates Cove Adventure Golf Course is indeed suspicious, Kitten starts his tales.
First is the Torso of Happisburgh: a legless, almost headless figure clad in a sailor uniform hauting a crossroads where once stood a well and ended up throwing itself in said well; after pulling a sack containing severed legs from there, the locals replaced the well with a pump, which stopped the sightings. Kitten however notes that ghostly growlings were heard again after the pump was removed, but stopped after it was reinstalled. Kitten quips about how ghosts don't make sense, but Big-D counters by replying that everything (even chaos) works according to some logic patterns, but humanity hasn't found out all patterns yet; for him, it is as delightful to shed more light on the workings of the supernatural than it is chasing the supernatural itself. As for the torso, Big-D claims that it seems like a typical ghostly entity, with the well and later the pump being it's fetter; he doesn't rule out, however, that the reapparition of the gohst was made-up by the locals in order to get the pump reinstalled.
After Big-D experiences some PTSD-like state about necromancers, Kitten tells the tale of the Witch of East Somerston: a peg-legged woman convincted for witchcraft and sentenced to be buried alive under a church. The story tells she kept laughing to the bitter end and, once buried, her peg-leg came out of the ground and turned into a giant oak, destroying the church where she was entombed. Big-D dubs the story to be made-up due to too many inconsistencies, but concedes that the story describes a textbook case of a death hex, a spell that might trigger when a mage dies. And uses it as the reason why one should kill a wizard by surprise or quickly enough so they can't cast their hex, as well as pointing out how powerful mages are in the World of Darkness.
Next is the story of Black Shuck, a black dog with red eyes sighted for several centuries who attacks religious congregations, with it's two more well known appearances during the 16th century devouring a man and child and causing a church to partially crumble down on the congretation while appearing in another far away church in flames, killing two other people. Kitten notes, however, that after those two, only simple sightings have been reported. After a small tangent where Big-D tells Kitten that he fought and bested every single supernatural species known to man, but decides against telling him him mummy adventures on the account of Kitten being British and a small rant about true names, the Not-Emperor joyfully explains that Black Shuck fits the M.O. of werewolves due to the attacks targeting religious sites in the past, but learned to cover their tracks better in the present day with the help of the Delirium (the supernatural panic-induced madness all but the strongest-willed humans feel upon witnessing a werewolf using it's War Form).
Kitten claims that the group could take on werewolves, but an unnaturally calm Big-D stops him. He explains that werewolves are on a whole other level than vampires and shouldn't be fought unless there's no other option, giving him serious pointers about how to survive a Garou... Before declaring it's OMELETTE TIME. While blending the omelette, Big-D explains that his recipe is actually mere acid he'll use to torture Kevin, or only threaten him upon hearing Kitten's complaints. During the conversation, Big-D slips up and reveals that Kevin is not a "Vampire Wizard" but a Tremere clan Vampire, prompting him to explain to Kitten what the Vampire clans are. Upon being bombarded with questions, a once again unnaturally calm Big-D tells his son-in-law that they'll need a new blender and that vampires hate being exposed and terminate with extreme prejudice any breach of their privacy. He explains the concept of Masquerade and how vampires fear that, should it be broken, humanity could band together and exterminate them. He states that vampires use networks of ghouls (humans enthralled by vampires) as their eyes and ears to report any Masquerade breach to their Kindred masters. Big-D declares that Hunters like himself spread vampire lore very carefully and bit by bit in order to not tip their foes and because they have almost no way to discern the truth from lies and misinterpretations, but reassures Kitten that he will teach the group what he knows at as slow pace in order to avoid making them the target of a Blood Hunt.
Kitten asks about Pyotr, with Big-D explaining to him that his Clan (Nosferatu) are the vampires' info brokers, that they can use their powers to turn invisible, control animals (regretting how he only fed Door Nosferatu spy rats, which turned him American), are ugly as sin (which, to the horror of Kitten, makes him realize that Pyotr took Kitten's insults towards his looks as pick-up lines) and have superhuman strength; Big-D however also points that vampires have many weaknesses, namely the more their generation is removed from their ancestor the weaker they are and their magic powers need work and practice to be as fearsome as they claim. Big-D goes to serve Kevin his omelette while Kitten leaves to buy a new blender, but not before being reminded to be extra careful near their prisoners, as even a skilled and experienced Hunter like Big-D almost died to a weak Kindred because he left his guard down.
The Probing of Kevin
- Canon, right after Kitten and Big-D's Primer on the Supernatural and Local Folklore
Chained in Kitten's house, Kevin gets beaten up for calling Big-D "gorillan" as he's orangutan-fan number one and shocks his captor when he reveals the existence of plasma televisions (not before mocking him for trying to buy a blender at a 99p store). The Tremere immediatly slips up by revealing the existence of Mr Smerples, his pet cat: a first clue for Big-D to realize Kevin for all his "evil vampire wizard" shtick isn't really happy with his unlife. Big-D thus decides to perform a most henious act: steal Kevin's wallet. We learn that Kevin, real name Kevin Wettsworth, is only 27 years old despite looking like an old man, something he blames on his stressful day job and psoriasis. Before owning each other with a quip, Big-D tricks Kevin into revealing his day job (and love of poppyseed bagels with cream cheese and lox) was accounting.
Kevin, after some prodding, reveals that he still is the tenant of his flat and used to sneak away from his packmates to fake being alive so his neighbours don't report him as missing, lamenting he was about to have saved up enough to buy it before he was Embraced. Kevin dryly notes that he wasn't earning enough even while under the Camarilla to pay all his bills and can only kill so many repo men; a hassle Big-D shares with him as, after stating they used to live in the Golden Goose (their bus), even if Kitten owns the house they live in, he's the only one who brought money in and recently lost his job. Kevin suggests that all the family look for jobs, which angers Big-D as he claims the burden of being a Hunter trumps every other concern, seeing Hunters as healers curing the world from the disease that is vampirism.
After rerouting the conversation towards Kevin (and beating him up for thinking about renting his flat to some ghouls as, to quote Big-D "Housing should not be a commodity" and thinks landlords are scum), the Tremere boasts about surviving several Blood Hunts and how he loathes the Camarilla because of their fanatical adherence to the Masquerade and tradition before claiming he broke free of the Tremere Pyramid (a powerful Blood Bond that ensures near-perfect hierarchical loyalty from sire to childe, including all Tremere up to the Clan Elders), all while explaining how the Pyramid is an awful mix of gaslighting, psychological abuse and slavery that makes Tremere vamnpires utterly miserable. Big-D panics upon hearing his captive claim he escaped the Pyramid by virtue of being Houdini (claiming HE killed Houdini) but one-ups Kevin by showing he knows Tremere Blood Magick is not true Magick before showing his extensive knowledge of the Tremere history... Only for Kevin to remind him that he was so low on the totem pole and young by vampire standards that he does not know "ye olde fun factes", frustrating the Not-Emperor by denying him a chance to speak about a subject he likes.
Kevin reveals that his sire was the right-hand woman of the Regent of Yarmouth. She, alongside the Regent, are powerful wizards but too busy sucking up to their superiors and way too clueless about Kine society, which is why they choose Kevin to act as their treasurer ; as an anecdote, he also reveals that he's a 9th generation vampire, making him the less removed from Caine of his pack as Shitbeard is 10th generation, Ape 11th and Pyotr 12th; despite being almost a Thin-Blood, Kevin notes Pyotr has been Embraced before them and thus leads the pack by virtue of being the most experienced. Starting his story again, Kevin states that he quickly fell out of favor after criticizing the incompetence of his sire and grandsire; namely, that even Blood Bonded ghouls need money to buy food and that nonexistent accounting would end up leading the taxmen to them. Shunned by his peers for being a Tremere and bullied by his sire for not being docile enough, Kevin decided to join the Sabbat to get revenge against the Camarilla.
Big-D notes that the Sabbat seems a bad fit for Kevin due to his ties to his human life, which he counters by saying the Vaulderie helped him broke free. After taunting Big-D about his ignorance about it (and getting beaten up for it), the vampire explains that the Vaulderie is a Blood Bond between members of a Sabbat pack, creating a bond (the Vinculum) removing all existing ones; which also helps them not murdering eachother. Despite being yet another Blood Bond as D points out, Kevin claims that it's effects are far lighter that the Pyramid. Now convinced that his captive is very unhappy about his unlife, Big-D, not before claiming he and his family killed a Lasombra Methuselah, asks Kevin if he joined the Sabbat as he really sympatized with their ideals or to flee the Camarilla. Realizing how insane and powerful his captor is, Kevin offers to Embrace Big-D and introduce him into the Sabbat; an offer refused as Big-D, in his own words, doesn't see the point to serve Caine "when he can kill him", something that breaks Kevin by the sheer coolness and insanity of such a claim. Big-D then proposes him to join his Crusade against vampires. Kevin refuses and calls Big-D an hypocrite for throwing away his principles on a whim because he likes him. A furious Big-D counters by telling Kevin he offers him an oportunity to rise against both the Sabbat with whom he has very little ties due to his clinging to his humanity and the Camarilla for tossing him away at the first opportunity.
Kevin tells a last parable; the story of Kevin Wettsworth, a nobody son of middle-class average people destined to live a plain and uneventful life who wanted to do more with his life and failed, but never truly gave up on his hopes and dreams to do something of his life and leave a trace in the world before being Embraced, turning his plain and mundane life into a living Hell where he must scavenge and spend his time in fear to survive, hoping he will receive his Final Death or fall to the Beast to end it all, seeing no other issue. Big-D claims otherwise, stating a different path is possible for him and all Kindred; all they have to do is rise and take the shot. As he opens Kevin's cell, the Tremere claims he knows a secret the Regent wouldn't want Hunters to know, causing Big-D to chuckle upon hearing the news.
And Karl tells the story of two kids running in the woods who find a pile of bodies and the resurrected furious grandmother of one of the kids.
Big-D's "Guide" to Avoiding Arrest
- Canon, right after Hunter's Hunters Hunted
[Quick recap of "If The Vampires Had a Tortured Wrestling Match" and "Hunter's Hunters Hunted"]
The scene opens to Big-D in a police interrogation room in Wells-Next-To-The-Sea, meeting Detective Sergeant Guy Chapman, who wishes to talk to Big-D about the prior events. Big-D is immediately on guard, suspicious that the officer may be a Camarilla agent. He has the difficult task of not only weaving a tale that will make the family appear innocent enough to not get arrested, but also throw off the officer's scent away from a potential Masquerade breach in case Chapman is indeed a compromized agent. He notes that he also has a "handicap", which is quickly revealed when Detective Chapman brings in cups of coffee for the two of them and refers to Big-D as "Kevin", showing that the head of the family has assumed the identity of the ex-Tremere vampire. Detective Chapman then tells Big-D that the interrogation will be recorded, something Big-D notes as an obvious falsehood due to his habit of sabotaging police equipment when entering an area.
After confirming the date, Big-D and Chapman get into some small-talk about the area, during which Big-D notes that Krakus found a dead body of a missing person. Big-D's internal monologue notes that Chapman is trying to act friendly to get the hunter in a good mood, something he pretends to fall for to try to flip it around on the detective. After the formal introductions for the record, Chapman gets to the point, asking Big-D to go over the events of the night. Pretending to merely be a friend of the family, Big-D claims to have met up with them to hang out, his thoughts detailing his plan to try to bait out any signs of Chapman being a vampire agent. No ordinary person would think anything special about the tunnels the Licks were hiding out in, so Big-D mentioning them would put the group in danger if he mentioned them and Chapman was indeed Camarilla. However, the missing persons reports in the area were another story, and a vital part of Big-D's strategy to divert Chapman's suspicion. As such, Big-D would detail the path the family took on the way to the tunnels, saying they were there to look into missing person reports in the area, but he makes sure not to talk about the tunnels themselves. He then falls silent, trying to bait out a leading question from the detective. Just as Big-D shouldn't know about the tunnels, neither should Detective Chapman. If the officer mentions anything about them, it might as well be undeniable proof that Chapman is working with the vampires.
Big-D's exaggrated groans are met with an interesting statement from the detective, who asks if the family "found" anyone. Taking a gamble and assuming the detective believes the missing people are still alive, Big-D answers affirmatively before getting caught off guard when the detective asks if the family invited home the people they found. Finding that question far too specific, the hunter comes to a disturbing realization: the rest of the family must have already been interviewed. Big-D had planned for that to happen, but he was not prepared to catch a curveball like that. He mentally curses Kitten's softhearted nature, but goes along with it, saying that he recognized one of the group from missing persons reports. Detective Chapman leaves, coming back with police files and asking Big-D if he could find the person he was thinking of. As the hunter flipped through the papers, he ruminates whether to pick a name at random before coming across a familar face by pure chance: a certain Peter Piotrowski. Or as the Family knows him: the late Pyotr. And so, Big-D begrudgingly uses Kitten's error to come up with his story: The family came across the Licks, Big-D recognized Peter from the reports, and allowed them to stay in their home. The moment the words leave his mouth, Big-D becomes worried that the rest of the family would have used a much different strategy. As he thinks, Big-D gets an idea on how to solve this problem, trusting that Marckus would have left his father a way to twist events in their favour.
With full faith in his son, Big-D continues his testimony, claiming that he had an odd feeling about the group and that he had suspected they were threatening Door and Boy, forcing them to drive weirdly, making sure to specifically point out that the others might not have noticed anything was going wrong. If he was right about Marckus's testimony, this would allow him to combine Kitten's statements with those of the rest of the family. After a moment of suspense, Detective Chapman confirms the situation and moves on to what happened at the house, confirming to Big-D that Marckus had successfully planted the seeds for his later victory. As Big-D's heart swells with pride.
Big-D's internal monologue notes how the situation is getting more complicated. The house is filled to bursting with incriminating firearms, and he's now walking into a metaphorical minefield similar to the literal one planted in their front lawn. In addition, a Camarilla agent would know exactly what the Licks were, and searching for any evidence that the Family were aware of that. Attempting to clear away all the evidence pointing at them in one fell swoop, Big-D weaved a tale of the intruders pulling out guns and forcing the family to dig the minefield against their will. The detective is still suspicious. Door is an EOD specialist, and the mines had to come from somewhere. Big-D flies into a mock rage, daring the detective to be dubious towards a traumatic situation like the one he came up with. During his rant, he mentions Hell's Fuckers, Shitbeard's old gang and a Sabbat affiliate, trying to shift the ownership of the explosives towards them. Detective Chapman is skeptical about all the coincidences, and Big-D begins to consider making a break for it before flying into a rage, as if desperate for the officer to believe an unlikely truth. A brief pause, and Detective Chapman begins to note everything he heard, seemlingly accepting the claim to Big-D's suspicion and relief. For a moment, Big-D wonders if it's merely an act, but then he looks at the detective's clammy hands and glazed expression. Chapman seems... genuinely concerned about something. At this point, Big-D is all but certain Chapman is a vampire agent, and begins to act to quell any chance of a potential Blood Hunt on the Family, noting how the intruders seemed to be concerned about a rival gang, but not giving any specifics.
Next, Detective Chapman moves onto the car and the pit Pyotr dug, which Big-D would genuinely have no knowledge of. As they talk, Chapman mentions that the car appears like it was thrown, a phrase Big-D finds suspicious. Why would Chapman say it like that? Big-D begins to doubt himself on whether Chapman is a spy, and quickly attempts to change the subject to him being unconscious. Big-D starts with Marckus getting thrown out the window, trusting the Family to not reveal that he deliberately jumped out. Big-D then explains that his jaw was broken by the fall, leading into a brief discussion about Bruce Campbell's movies that is interrupted by Chapman suddenly cringing for a moment, his face heavily contorting. The two ignore this and get back to the point, upon which Chapman unintentionally reveals something that would make Big-D's exit a lot more difficult to explain. Not only did Marckus's fall and Big-D's fall happen several minutes apart, something the Hunter would have to hope the detective was unaware of, but someone in the family (most likely Boy) had screwed up and claimed Big-D was dragged out the window, which shouldn't have been possible. Taking a massive risk, Big-D claims that Marckus had grabbed him as he was falling out the window, and one of the gang pushed them both out when Big-D tried to grip the windowsill. He braces himself himself for Chapman to ask about the time... a question that never came. Relief flooded the hunter as he realized the detective was genuinely unaware about the time difference... which quickly faded as the detective asked about the cellar. To his horror, Big-D realizes they must have found Marckus's dungeon.[Work in progress]
Something is Wrong with Horse
- Canon, some time after Big-D's "Guide to Avoiding Arrest
Marckus Goes Pubbing with his Weirdo Friends (and gets in a brawl)
- Canon, after Big-D's "Guide" to Avoiding Arrest and possibly Something is Wrong with Horse
The Blender Crusade: In Spiteful Defiance of Corporate Villainy
- Canon, after Highly Controversial Debate (CHOOSE YOUR SIDE)
The Blender Crusade: ASSAULT ON THE ELDERLY (A Financial Horror)
- Canon, directly after end of The Blender Crusade: In Spiteful Defiance of Corporate Villainy''
""Ꮆ卂爪乇尺 卩ㄖᗪ匚卂丂ㄒ"" - A Hunter: The Parenting Disaster
- Canon, recorded at some point after Big-D's "Guide to Avoiding Arrest".
Arc Two
Episode 4: The Feuds of Our Fathers
- Canon, some time after "The Blender Crusade: ASSAULT ON THE ELDERLY (A Financial Horror)"
Shorts
Highly Controversial Debate (CHOOSE YOUR SIDE)
- Canon, directly after Big-D's "Guide" to Avoiding Arrest
A Life Well-Lived
- Unknown canoncity and time period
