I Solemnly Swear
Sookie and Lorelai attend a class to prepare for opening an inn and run into Sookie's old friend Joe and his friend Alex. Emily gets sued by one of the maids she fired. Francine tries to sow discord between Paris and Rory with pictures of herself talking to Rory in the parking garage, but it's her off-hand comment about Jamie that does the trick.
Luke takes Lorelai's and Rory's order on the street outside the diner on his way to buy food. Paris chases Rory around with a sword. Alex invites Lorelai out on a date.
Maid who sues: Gerta, from Hamburg, Germany. She got fired for making too much noise when she worked.
Maid of the week: Brooke, who eventually gets fired for being so quiet that having her around feels like being stalked by an elf.
Tropes
- Afraid of Blood: Madeline is absolutely terrified of the word "blood".
- Blackmail: Francine pretends to find photos in her locker of her meeting with Rory in the garage, making it look like she was conspiring with her. Paris sees through it, since why would Rory blackmail Francine by threatening to reveal they talked when Rory is the one Paris trusts, but Paris still gets mad that Rory told Francie about Jamie.
- Blatant Lies: Francie plays meek and innocent when "telling" Paris about the pictures. Paris pretends to buy it, averting the trope, because Francie buys that.
- Brick Joke: The Ben Hur reference comes back to haunt Lorelai after she mentioned it in her deposition.
- Comically Missing the Point: Lorelai and Alex feel left out of Sookie and Joe's joyful reunion, so make up their own past together. Sookie misunderstands and thinks they really knew each other from before.
- Compliment Backfire: Emily's lawyer wonders if she meant it as a compliment when she called Gerta "jackbooted." Emily doesn't think anyone would take that as a compliment.
- Confusion Fu: Sookie and Joe's old friend Feldman tried this on a cop once, using words like "flooginshorts."
- Creepy Monotone: The lecturer in the hotel class seems to refuse to sound even remotely interested in his own lecture on principle.
- Five-Second Foreshadowing: Rory muses about how their gym class has them practicing a sport whose original purpose was to kill people, i.e. fencing. Cue Paris practically trying to kill her.
- Godwin's Law: Emily claims the maid who is suing her sounded like she was marching on Poland every time she walked to the fridge.
- Hypocritical Humor: Lorelai accuses Emily of always finding the one small thing that is wrong about each of her maids, an accusation Emily has leveled against Lorelai regarding how she dumps boyfriends.
- Master of the Mixed Message: Sookie explains to an old friend that she can't date him.Sookie: Not that going out with you would be bad. Except it would. It would be very bad.
- My Hovercraft Is Full of Eels: Feldman, a mutual friend of Sookie and Joe's, once tried to convince a cop he didn't speak English by saying things like "Flooginshorts."
- Mythology Gag: When the suggestion box for commencement speaker is stuffed with joke nominees, Paris remarks that Chilton will get a second-rate speaker while Choate will get someone respectable. Choate, a co-ed preparatory school in Wallingford, Connecticut, was the real-world inspiration for Chilton.
- No Sympathy for Grudgeholders: Francine invokes this when she says if she's not gonna commit to a grudge, she'd rather just deal with it and move on.
- Plot Parallel:
- While Emily is getting sued for being demanding when it comes to maids, comparing it to paying for first class and being stuck in coach, Sookie yells at Jackson for bringing different vegetables than she ordered, but he yells back ("the ones you ordered were poorer quality!").
- Also, while Paris feels betrayed by Rory meeting Francie behind her back and attacking her with an epée for it, Emily feels stabbed in the back by Lorelai's deposition.
- Pun: Lorelai beat a dead horse to death with hamburger jokes when Emily hired a maid from Hamburg.
- Right for the Wrong Reasons: Madeline and Louise agree that stripping must be very healthy since you never see any overweight strippers.
- Shout-Out:
- Sookie makes a Superman joke about Jackson swooping in to save her.
- Paris compares the suggestions of her fellow student council members to children's book ''Eloise at the Plaza'', while fellow prep school Choate gets read Joan Didion.
- Paris refers to Francie as Ginger Spice.
- Paris calls Madeline John Williams because she is humming.
- Lorelai quotes Kids in the Hall when she is annoyed by a sales pitch.Lorelai: (makes pinching motion) I'm crrrushing their heads.
- Sookie is proud to be someone's Daisy.
- Emily runs her household like the rowing scene in Ben-Hur and the "Express Yourself" video according to Lorelai.
- Sookie ruins Creedence Clearwater Revival for Jackson.
- Stealth Hi/Bye: Francine passes notes this way. She even disappears in a garage when Rory turns around for five seconds.
