Chris: Don't suppose you fancy a shag, "Di"?
Sharon: Up yours, big ears.
— Chris and Sharon Theodopolopodous jokingly comparing themselves to Princess Diana and Prince Charles.
- Date First Aired: 23/06/1997
After having been kicked out of the house last episode, Sharon is not enjoying Chris' presence in their flat and tries to get back to Tracey's home, although Tracey refuses to do so. Darryl isn't happy, having become reliant on handouts from Sharon, and Tracey wants him to look after the pool business for a while.
Meanwhile, Dorien's divorce is getting nastier - Marcus now wants full custody of the house, and she needs leverage. This leverage comes in the form of Marcus' Secret Other Family and Dorien decides to start spying on her and talking to her.
However, there is trouble - Darryl is failing to look after the pool business properly and builds a pool at the wrong house. Even worse, Darryl, sick of trying to go straight, gets into a deal with Doddsy involving counterfeit cash, leading to him and Chris being arrested and returned to prison for ten years. Sharon is disappointed as she was beginning to like Chris again, seeing as he had become a pizza delivery boy. Tracey however is disappointed and gives her wedding ring to a homeless man - a sign that her marriage is for the most part over.
Tropes in this episode:
- Ancestral Name: One of Geraldine's kids is named after his father, Marcus.
- Batter Up!:
- According to Chris, the only reason that no one died after the events of the last episode was that Sharon made her escape before Darryl got to her with a baseball bat.
- Doddsy almost attacks Chris with a bat before realising who he is.
- Comically Missing the Point: When Sharon tells Darryl that he can't use polystyrene tiles to line a swimming pool, he asks if they're too big, not realising they can't handle water.
- Continuity Nod:
- Sharon mentions her previous desire to divorce Chris.
- Chris mentions phoning Tony and George.
- Counterfeit Cash: Darryl, sick of trying to go straight, gets into a deal with Doddsy involving the sale of fake cash, which is how he gets thrown into prison again.Doddsy: Look, these little beauties are so good, i's almost criminal. Well, it is criminal, but not even the governor of the Bank of England himself's gonna spot these.
- Dartboard of Hate: Darryl has a punching bag with Sharon's face on it which he uses to let out stress.Tracey: Tha's 'orrible.Darryl: I know, but if I hit it enough, I might punch 'er good lookin'.
- Downer Ending: Chris and Darryl are sent back to prison and Tracey gives her wedding ring to a homeless man, signifying that her marriage to Darryl is for the most part over.
- Duck!: Tracey tells everyone to duck as Geraldine is coming in their direction. Sharon then points out that it's unlikely that they will be recognised.
- Dumpster Dive: At least some of Chris and Sharon's new furniture came from the skip.
- The Ghost: Mr. Parsons, Tracey and Sharon's newest client.
- Groin Attack: When Tracey tells Sharon she's cut off Darryl's manhood, Sharon retorts she would have remembered that.
- Horrible Housing: Sharon tells Dorien that if she had a child, she could get a council flat for single mothers - providing she had no allergy to asbestos.
- Maligned Mixed Marriage: As it turns out, the Jewish Marcus married a Catholic, which Dorien plans to exploit as his mother could have a heart attack if she found out.
- Marital Rape License: Played for Laughs; Chris is mentioned to have had sex with Sharon in her sleep in the past.
- My God, You Are Serious!: Sharon's response to Tracey suggesting that Darryl runs the pool business for a while - laugh before realizing that Tracey is serious.
- One-Shot Character: Little Marcus and Doddsy, the Butcher of Balham.
- One-Steve Limit: Invoked; Geraldine doesn't know her and Dorien's Marcus is the same person, so Dorien pretends they have the same name.
- One-Word Title: The name of the episode is simply "Porridge".
- Plumber's Crack: Sharon notices that something's up with Darryl and the pool business when she notices a notable lack of workers flashing their cracks.
- Preemptive "Shut Up": Once Tracey sees Dorien walk through the door, she puts her hand up and tells her this isn't a good time.
- Reports of My Death Were Greatly Exaggerated: As it turns out, Marcus had told Geraldine that Dorien had died in a bungee jumping accident, much to Dorien's horror.
- Returning the Wedding Ring: Tracey gives her wedding ring to a homeless man after she learns that Darryl has been sent back to jail.
- Right in Front of Me: Geraldine is unaware that she's talking to Dorien, who used to be Marcus' wife, and starts talking about her in negative terms like "a real witch" and "a complete cow".
- Series Continuity Error: Chris mentions phoning Costas, who had died in "Business".
- Shout-Out:
- The name of the episode is a reference to the 1970's Brit Com Porridge.
- Sharon admits she's no Barbara Cartland.
- Sharon asks Dorien if the mirror on her wall has been mentioning Snow White again.
- Dorien once went to a garden party and wore an identical frock to Princess Margaret:Dorien: Looks like one of The Beverley Sisters has died.
- Doddsy calls Chris "Jiminy Cricket" and "Zorba".
- Sleeping Single: Both Sharon and Chris are sleeping separately at the start of the episode. Chris tries to sleep in Sharon's bed, but she doesn't appreciate it.
- Speak in Unison: Tracey, Sharon and Darryl all tell Kenny to "Shut up" when he suggests blaming a pool that shouldn't be there on a dog.
- Stay in the Kitchen: Darryl thinks that though Sharon was fine cooking at the cafe, not only should she be not doing any business but that the world of business is a man's job.
- Take That!:
- Sharon notes that there is always going to be a touch of Diana and Charles to their dysfunctional relationship with Chris.
- Sharon notes that Darryl's old conservatory business makes Yorkshire Waters look competent.
- Sharon remarks that she'll have to stop Tracey from watching The Bill.
- Teeny Weenie: When Geraldine mentions her child "Little Marcus", Dorien remarks that she calls Marcus "little" too.
- Wham Episode: Chris and Darryl are sent back to prison and, due to the circumstances, Tracey's marriage to Darryl is permanently damaged, to the point that they've divorced come the Revival.
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong?: Doddsy asks what can go wrong with selling Counterfeit Cash to Chris and Darryl right before the police come in and arrest them all.
