Recap / Birds of a Feather S4E11: The Front

Tracey: She's out. Sorry, gone to 'ospital. She's dead sorry, 'ad a turn. An' don' go tryin' nex' door cause there's no one a that name there, you know, of either name. There's no Sharon Theodopolopodous or Dorien Green nex' door. They both live 'ere an' she's out. Dorien an' Sharon bein' the one person like an' 'avin' gone to 'ospital with a turn. The man nex' door ain't nuffin' with 'er, either of 'em like. But you 'ave got the right address and it was dead nice o' ya to call, and she'll be in touch as soon as she gets back, which shouldn' be long, cause it wasn't nuffin' serious, an'... ooh isn' that a nice tie? Cheers.

— Tracey Stubbs trying to pretend Dorien isn't in.

• Date First Aired: 15/11/1992

Dorien's manuscript, Promises To Keep, has been taken up by a publisher, but it has become too raunchy to publish under her own name. She has already given out her name as "Sharon Theodopolopodous", claiming that her real name is a pen name, so now she needs the girls' help to keep up the pretense. The girls try to make the book acceptable by giving it some rewrites, but the publisher gets arrested under the Obscene Publications Act anyway.

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Tropes In This Episode:

• All for Nothing: Everyone's attempts to rewrite a chapter prove to be pointless when the publisher is arrested.
• Brick Joke: When Darryl gives Tracey the chapter he and Chris rewrote, he asks if he can meet the publisher. When Mr. Roughead is arrested at the end of the episode, Tracey remarks Darryl's got his wish.
• Call-Back: By this point, the book that Dorien had started writing in "Cuckoo" has gotten a name and is due to be published by Dorien.
• Character Name Alias: When caught by Mr. Roughead, Dorien panics and tells him her name is Pussy Golightly, the former name of the heroine of Promises To Keep.
• Deadpan Snarker: Sharon in her first exchange with Dorien.
  Dorien: Hello Sharon.
  Sharon: Wotcha Dor.
  Dorien: You are in then?
  Sharon: No use tryin' to pull the wool over your eyes, is it?
• Fictional Document:
  • By this point, Dorien's manuscript has gotten a name, Promises To Keep.
  • Mr. Roughead mentions a book he published called Libido, which he describes as "red-hot".
• Gilligan Cut: Sharon tells Dorien she won't wear fancy clothes and talk posh for her and that is final. Smash cut to her dressed up and practicing her accent.
• Knocking on Heathens' Door: A person shows up on the door trying to preach the Bible, which Tracey responds to by promptly shutting the door in his face.
• Locked Out of the Loop: Garth was not told about the masquerade that was being kept up by the girls, leading to some awkward comments.
• Maintain the Lie: Dorien wants Sharon and Tracey to maintain the lie that her true name is Sharon (as well as other associated lies).
• Malaproper: Tracey says "prostrate" when she means prostate.
• Mathematician's Answer: When Mr. Roughead asks her how she writes, Sharon responds that she uses a biro.
• One-Shot Character: Mr. Roughhead.
• Pen Name: Dorien ends up lying that her actual name was a pen name and that her actual name is Sharon.
• Really Gets Around: This applies to the heroine of Promises To Keep, which is a large part of the story's appeal.
  Garth: That Pussy Golightly's a right little goer, isn't she?
• Rich Language, Poor Language: Dorien wants Sharon to talk less common when Mr. Roughead comes to visit.
  Dorien: I don't want him to think that the author of Promises To Keep is from Albert Square.
• Running Gag: Tracey commenting that Dorien was put on the spot each time she mentions something that she made up.
• Sexless Marriage: Dorien worries that if Marcus reads Promises To Keep, he'll work out she's been cheating because she'd never done any of the many sex acts in the book with him.
• Shout-Out:
  • The title is a reference to The Front.
  • The name of Dorien's manuscript is likely taken from a quote by Robert Frost.
  • Sharon calls Promises To Keep the Guinness Book of Bonking.
  • Dorien lies about going to Girton College.
  • Dorien was once put on the spot and used Sue Lawley as a fake name after listening to Desert Island Discs, noting she was lucky she didn't say she was Princess Anne.
  • When Tracey asks Sharon to hide and whisper things for her to say when Mr. Roughead comes over, Dorien remarks this isn't Hamlet or Run for Your Wife.
  • Sharon mentions Oxford and Cambridge.
  • Dorien compares Tracey to Monica Seles.
  • Garth tells Tracey she's no Jane Austen.
  • Sharon calls Garth "Frederick Forsyth".
  • Darryl warns Tracey that his writing isn't as good as Harold Robbins' work.
• Speak in Unison:
  • Dorien sees Tracey and Sharon happily reading her rewritten chapter of Promises To Keep and asks them if it's okay. Their response?
    Tracey/Sharon: No, it's crap.
  • After Sharon mentions that she, Tracey and Garth know nothing about getting a lot of money illegally, the three realise something at the same time.
    Tracey/Sharon/Garth: But we know a man who does.
• Sudden Name Change: Dorien changes the name of the heroine of Promises To Keep from Pussy Golightly to Rebecca Cavendish. Tracey still doesn't like the name, but remarks anything's better than Pussy Golightly.
• Take Our Word for It: We once again never get to hear any of Promises To Keep read out, but everyone's reactions and Mr. Roughead being arrested for trying to publish it tells us that it is incredibly smutty.
• Take That!:
  • Dorien critiques Sharon's C&A clothing.
  • Sharon tells Tracey that Promises To Keep needs another sex scene like Suzanne Charlton needs a crash diet.

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