I have fought a Grizzly Bear, tracked a Cobra to its lair,
Killed a Crocodile who dared to cross my path
But the thing I really dread, when I've just got out of bed
Is to find that there's a Spider in the bath...
— Flanders and Swann, "The Spider"
Indiana Jones: There's a big snake in the plane, Jock!
Jock: Oh, that's just my pet snake Reggie!
Indiana Jones: I hate snakes, Jock! I hate 'em!
Jock: Come on! Show a little backbone, will ya?
Indiana Jones: Snakes. Why'd it have be snakes?
Sharks. Why did it have to be sharks?
— O'Chul, The Order of the Stick
The only thing we have to fear is FEAR ITSELF. . . and spiders.
Gilgamesh, Girl Genius
That was a small army, this is a big spider!
Gilgamesh, Girl Genius
Ronald Weasley: (talking in his sleep) Spiders! They want me to tap-dance! I don't want to tap-dance!
Harry Potter: You tell those spiders, Ron.
Ronald Weasley: Yeah, tell them. ... I'll tell them.
...And at the last, I say to you, look to your -Snakesnakesnakesnake-SNAKE!-SNAKE! OH MY GOD TAKE IT AWAAAY!
Swede: Don't make me do it, Gunny, I'm afraid of heights!
Highway: So am I, kid.
Swede: You are?
Highway: Jumping out of a perfectly good aircraft is not a natural act. Now let's do this right and enjoy the view.
— Heartbreak Ridge during a parachute jump into a warzone.
Homer: Kids, your mother has a fear of flying.
Bart: So much for the days when I could say "at least my mother's normal".
Marge: Well everybody's got a fear of something.
Homer: Not everybody!
Marge: [irritated] Sock puppets!
Homer: WHERE?! WHERE?! AAH! AAH! [runs off]
"Today we're talking about geese. I hate them a lot. And it's not important why, just keep that in mind: that I, sincerely—they're probably the only animal that I hate. Geese mate for life. I had no idea that such jerks could attach for that long. It's unknown to us whether or not if one of them dies from being an asshole, that the other one gets a new asshole mate. And to know they have anything in common with something as adorable as penguins hurts. ...Now here's something that makes perfect sense: good poop is poisonous, yup. Their poop contains e.coli, so when they're poopin' in your lakes and water and stuff, then...you swim in the water, and you could get e.coli, so don't do that. And our final fact from our in-house goose expert, me: They're dicks."
—Animal lover Catee Wayne