Web Video: The Tourettes Guy
"Drink and get mad at sh*t"The Tourettes Guy
— A review
sums up the Tourettes Guy's life perfectly
is a series of YouTube
videos following the eponymous Danny, a foul-tempered and foul-mouthed man with "Tourette's syndrome
" - though his behavior is likely more influenced by all the booze he drinks.
His friends and family often show up, but aside from his equally foul-mouthed father, they are only heard from offscreen and never seen.
For a while, it was believed that Danny had died in a car accident. However, between Christmas 2009 and Christmas 2010, 3 new videos were posted, and his website claimed that he was still alive and had just been in jail the whole time. New videos were posted on Christmas 2012
, and on Halloween and Christmas 2014.
- The Alcoholic: Danny, who is almost always seen with a beer bottle. The official website claims that his behavior is likely influenced more by his drinking than his Tourette's.
- All There in the Manual: The main website has a little more info about Danny and his life, such as pointing out that his behavior is more likely due to his alcoholism than his disorder and explaining his absence as a result of him being in prison for a brief time (this is alluded to in one of the videos but not discussed in depth).
- Amazingly Embarrassing Parents: Danny, as shown during the outing to a grocery store.
- Angrish: Danny has a penchant for this. "SHIT! Murwargfuh FUCK!"
- April Fools: The second Return of the Tourettes Guy episode opens with one, featuring "the winner of the Tourettes Guy look-a-like contest".
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking:
Why did you move here from North Dakota? Danny:
My wife was fuckin' everybody in Bismarck
Is that why you two got a divorce back in 1999? Danny:
That, and her spaghetti sucked dick.
- Ass Shove:
- Danny claims he wants to shove a broom up the ass of the person who named Fashion Bug.
- He also claims during a bowling game that he wants to shove a can of Pringles up a preacher's ass.
- Also, apparently something happens when Alex Trebek has a picture of a giraffe in his ass during an earthquake.
- Atomic F-Bomb:
- After the The Police version of "Every Breath You Take" played while he was on hold with Colgate (he hoped it was the Puff Daddy cover). (see above picture)
- Yelling "SHIIIIIIIIIIT!" offscreen, which synched up perfectly with Mufasa falling off a cliff on the TV.
- At his son's job interview, after telling him thrice he didn't want some Twizzlers his son was eating, he screams "BUTT FUCK!!" The person napping nearby was not amused.
- After crashing headfirst into the chandelier.
- As the cameraman drives away from the Tourette's Guy's dad as quickly as possible, he screams "You cocksuckerrrrrrrrr!!!!", complete with Doppler effect.
- After someone accidentally hits him with the door.
- When someone tries to interrupt his teeth-brushing session.
- Author Appeal: Including Danny's shirt, there are a lot of references to breakfast cereal. And almost all the videos involve phones.
- Badass Beard: Danny's dad, who bears a striking resemblance to Santa Claus. Danny lands into a bit of trouble when he points this out. (See Berserk Button below.)
- Badass Grandpa: Danny's dad is able to put up a fight despite his age.
- Belligerent Sexual Tension: Between him and his ex-wife, Shirlena. "BITCH! I love you."
- Berserk Button: Danny has tons:
- Talking shit about Total around Danny.
- Talking about Danny's dick without his permission.
- Wrinkling Danny's Randy Travis poster.
- Pissing on Danny's toilet seat.
- Hiding Danny's car keys. (Then again, that's probably for his own good if he gets drunk all the time)
- Squirrels humping Danny's tomato garden.
- Having bad-looking sideburns in front of Danny.
- When Danny's Dairy Queen ice cream melts.
- Trying to convince Danny to have something he doesn't want to eat.
- Interfering with Danny's favorite TV shows or not knowing about them yourself.
- Playing loud music in the vicinity of Danny.
- Also, Danny's dad does not like to be called a Mall Santa.
Danny: FUCK YOU AND EVERY MALL SANTA THAT LOOKS LIKE YOU!!!
Danny's Dad has Danny in a headlock
Danny's Dad: So you wanna talk some shit, huh, baldy? Ha ha ha.
- Big Black Women With Big Tits, You Can't Miss 'Em: They get referenced in several videos. In addition to the line from the Gag Dub of The Lion King, Danny thinks "Amazon.com" is the name of a big black woman his son works with, and Danny's dad tries to hit on one at a store (well, her ass was big at least).
- Big "NO!": When a grocer tries to take away Danny's marshmallows.
- When Danny's son wants to have Danny try some Twizzler's, he does it thrice.
- Big "Shut Up!": One came out of the blue after Danny tells a story about him recently being kicked out of a Lens Crafters.
- Bring My Brown Pants: Implied in the Halloween 2014 video, where Danny says "You scared shit out of me!" in response to his son's prank. Keep in mind that he didn't say "scared the shit out of me" as the phrase usually goes, and he was heading into the bathroom when the scare happened, so it's quite possible he meant it literally.
- Butt Monkey/Chew Toy: Danny. (See Slapstick below for examples.)
- Camera Abuse: Danny has done it thrice.
- Once was when he attacked the camera and sent it to the bottom of the stairs (and then threw his shoe at it).
- Another was when he attacked the camera with a broom trying to hit a bird.
- After spilling a year's supply of paper towels on the stairs, first the box hits the camera, then Danny himself stumbles into the camera trying to navigate his way down the stairs around all the paper towel rolls.
- Captain Obvious: "Pissing out the window and shitting out the window are two different things!"
- Cloud Cuckoo Lander: Danny is an incredibly foul-mouthed one.
- Cluster Bleep Bomb: When taking some medicine, Danny accidentally turns on the hot water and burns himself, shouting "FUUUUUCK! IT'S HOTTER THAN *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*!!!"
- Cluster F-Bomb:
- One example: Danny carrying a hot casserole dish without oven mitts. When he gets back up after putting it down on the table, he hits his head on a chandelier. Leave room and cue Atomic F-Bomb!
- Another example: Danny "arguing" with Shirlena; they're pretty much just yelling "Fuck you!" at each other repeatedly. Then Danny's father proceeds to join in.
- Another example is when Danny's beer can spills on him, and when someone offscreen asks if he wanted a towel, he yells "FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU IN THE ASS!"
- Danny does this when playing (and failing at) Mortal Kombat.
- Colbert Bump: It may have been unintentional, but Danny talking about someone going to Jolly Pirate Donuts and taking a 2-hour shit caused someone to actually seek out the restaurant and put a review up online.
- Comedic Sociopathy: Oh so much.
- Comically Missing the Point: In one video, Danny is watching an exercise program. He isn't exactly exercising. He's moving the top half of his body while sitting down and eating chips.
- Heaven knows what started this argument, but it ends up hilariously.
Danny's Son: Then he told me to tell you that he wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.
: Well you tell him that I said I wouldn't piss on him if he was on Jeopardy!
- Comical Overreacting: Danny's son started to jump with joy when he agreed to buy some microwaved popcorn. He had to tell him to calm down and to not get a big dick.
- Cool and Unusual Punishment: "I'm gonna scotch tape your ass shut!"
- Corpsing: The cameraman does this occasionally in response to Danny's outbursts.
- On one instance, he actually fell to the floor laughing.
- Another instance occurred when Shirlena was discussing her grandpa's worsening Alzheimer's. Usually such a disease is Serious Business, but Shirlena's story was so outrageous that Danny was unable to stop giggling.
- On another occasion, the cameraman's laughter caused him to drop Danny's dad while trying to help him up. Cue Chase Scene that ends with the cameraman driving away from Danny's dad as fast as he can.
- Country Matters: So far, the C word has only been used once.
- Curse Cut Short: One of Danny's many curses is interrupted by a jump cut...to another curse.
Danny: By the way you cocksuc-(cut)-bastards!
- Another instance is when Danny's beer can spills all over him, he yells, "AW SHIT! AW F—", before another jump cut.
- When Danny is cursing at the bottle of Head & Shoulders shampoo in the shower, he cuts his own curse short and replaces it with another one.
Danny: Oh sh- piss!
- Cut His Heart Out with a Spoon: "Then I'll tie Pat Sajak to a telephone pole, and let a UPS guy buttfuck him!"
- A Date with Rosie Palms: When Danny finishes a story of him being kicked out of a Lens Crafters, he scratches an itch that just so happened to be on his you-know-what. Of course, viewers thought he was masturbating.
- Death Glare:
- Danny does one on two separate occasions after hearing the Cameraman's Corpsing.
- The sleeping man after being awaken by Danny's "BUTTFUCK!!!!"
- Danny gives another one when going on a rant about his cable provider and threatening to sue them.
- Department of Redundancy Department: "Suck my dick...or cock!"
- Dissimile: Danny loves using these.
- "These fish sticks are hard as tits!"
- "Let me tell you about a porcupine's balls! They're small, and they don't give a SHIT!"
- "Why don't you make like a banana and shit!"
- "That's what happens when Alex Trebek has a picture of a giraffe in his ass during an earthquake!"
- Erotic Eating: Strangely invoked - after commenting on a woman described as a lesbian that "that just means she likes what I like", Danny bites into a corn dog.
- Even the Subtitler Is Stumped: In "Bird in the House", Danny goes running into the other room after his son tells him there's a bird in the house, yelling some of his usual curses before shouting something unintelligible ("???").
- Everything's Worse with Bees: In one episode, Danny gets attacked by a swarm of bees while he's mowing the lawn. He handles it about as well as you'd think.
- Freudian Excuse: Considering what his father is like, Danny probably has a pretty good one.
- Freudian Slip: "I talk to my son ON A DICK! (Beat) ...DAILY BASIS!"
- Funny Background Event: Danny shouted "PISS!" so loud that the top page of a wall calendar came loose and fell back down, changing the calendar to the previous month.
- Fun with Homophones: Courtesy of Danny's dad:
Danny's Dad: FUCK the Philippines! They can fill up my ass! (swigs beer)
- Danny gets in on this too:
A man hits Danny in the ass with his knee Danny:
Oh! What the hell?! Man:
Oh, I'm sorry dude. I just kneed you right in the ass. Danny:
What the hell do you mean? (Beat
) You "need me in the ass
- Gag Dub: During one episode, Danny's son is watching The Lion King while Danny himself is cussing people out on the phone in the next room. They sync up surprisingly well.
- Go to Your Room: Said verbatim after Danny grounds his son for not thinking that the garbage disposal sounds like Chewbacca taking a shit.
- Green Aesop: "I'm getting sick and goddamn tired of all these looters and polluters!"
- Groin Attack: Danny's son accidentally throws a paper towel at his crotch. Luckily, it wasn't hard...the paper towel, not his dick.
- Threats of a Groin Attack also come up on occasion.
(to Danny) I'll kick you in the balls! Danny:
(about George W. Bush
) I'd like to punch him right in the stupid COCK! (punching the air) Shit! Bitch! Danny's dad:
If some asshole calls me "mellow yellow", I'm gonna kick 'em right in the cock.
- Hair-Trigger Temper: Danny, of course. He also apparently takes after his father.
- Halloween Episode: Posted on Halloween 2014 and under a minute long. It features Danny's son dressing up as Freddy Krueger and scaring the living daylights out of Danny.
- He Who Must Not Be Seen: Every recurring character except for Danny and his dad.
- Danny's son was fully on-camera in one video... wearing a Freddy Krueger costume which featured a rubber mask that obscured his face.
- Hollywood Tourette's: It's sort of a given.
- Hypocritical Humor: Danny admonishes his son for saying "shit", after saying it six times since he entered the room.
- "I don't hate gays, but if some faggot ever tries to touch me..."
- He was probably implying that he'll ignore it, but if a gay does try to molest/marry/etc...
- Danny wears glasses, but that doesn't stop him from calling Rick Moranis "four eyes".
- Several episodes after Danny's Limited Wardrobe was lampshaded by his dad, guess what said dad is wearing in the next episode he appears in.
- Calls an angry janitor, who has a beer belly but some buff arms, a fatass, while Danny...is fat.
- Danny's dad - who is bald - calls Danny "baldy" during a fight.
- I Have to Go Iron My Dog: Perhaps the only past tense version ever used (unless he was serious).
Danny: I didn't talk to nobody yesterday, I was in the car taking a SHIT!
- Jerkass: Danny, so much, as he often curses at others and even laughed when Shirlena was telling a sad story about her grandfather's Alzheimer's. But it's part of the humor.
- Also, his dad, who isn't much different.
- Large Ham: Danny and his dad get really loud and emotional.
- Like Father, Like Son: His dad swears just as much as he does.
- Limited Wardrobe: In almost every single episode, Danny wears a neck brace and a Tony the Tiger T-shirt. His dad called him out on it in one episode.
Danny's Dad: You change your damn glasses more than you change your damn shirt! Why don't you trying wearing a different shirt for once in your life?
Danny: Why don't you just FUCK OFF!!!
- Literary Agent Hypothesis: The series is purported to be a documentary.
- Lurid Tales of Doom: Danny's son reads from a tabloid magazine while in the checkout line at the store.
It says here that Dr. Phil
was in a porno movie. Danny's Dad:
I believe it. Because Dr. Phil is a big dick.
- Mad Scientist: According to one video's description, Danny's psychiatrist put a giant blue M&M in his bedroom to see how a person with Tourette's would react when waking up next to a giant blue M&M.
- Malaproper: "He's not playing with a full dick!"
- Mall Santa: Danny's dad looks like one, though he doesn't like to be compared to Santa.
- Mistaken for Gay: Danny postulates that wherever Brent Spiner is nowadays, "He's probably getting fucked in the ass!"
- Mockumentary: Apparently.
- Mood Whiplash: When Shirlena mishears Danny on what she wants for breakfast:
Shirlena: Danny, what do you want for breakfast?
Danny: Bacon and eggs, dear.
Danny: OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, I SAID BACON AND EGGS!!!
- Mooning: "Does this look like the ass of someone who would know if the Jiffy Lube is open on Sundays?" note
- Narm: In-Universe, Danny really tries to pay attention to Shirlena when she's telling him about her grandfather's increasingly severe Alzheimer's, but the details of the story are so outrageous that Danny can't help but corpse.
- Nerd Glasses: Danny is almost always bespectacled in this videos, and he has sported a pair of horn rims since his return.
- No Indoor Voice: Boy howdy...
Danny: THAT'S MY ASS!!!
- Noodle Incident: There are a ton of them.
- "That's what happens when Alex Trebek has a picture of a giraffe in his ass during an earthquake."
- "This is the second time I've been fucked by Dairy Queen!"
- Whatever caused Danny to call Colgate's consumer affairs.
- How Danny ended up in jail for about a year. However he ended up there, judging by the way Danny talks about it, it was not a pleasant experience.
- Oh, Crap: "I'm gonna whip your ass, you little son of a bitch! Come back here, you cocksucker!"
- Orphaned Punchline: Some clips are just a second or two of Danny saying something bizarre:
"Ronald McGoddamn Donald!"
"Just how much ass are we talking about?"
"If she was a car, she'd be a 4-door Ford Whore! Bitch."
- Overly Long Gag: So many of them.
- Danny looking through a phonebook.
- Danny watching lottery results (he loses).
- Danny brushing his teeth.
- Danny showering.
- Pac Man Fever: Danny plays Mortal Kombat 9 on a PS3, and as expected, doesn't do too well. His son's advice? "Hit B!" note
- Parental Neglect: Upon hearing a loud crashing noise while reading the paper.
Danny: The hell was that?!
???: Danny, your son just fell down the stairs!
Danny: Well, QUIT IT! (goes back to reading the paper)
- Pet the Dog: Despite all his nastiness he doesn't have anything against homosexuals, unless they try to touch him first, but that's really unlikely too.
- Potty Emergency: Danny's dad at a McDonald's.
Danny's dad: Oh shit.
Customer: What, did you forget your wallet?
Danny's dad: No, I mean MOVE, I gotta shit! (pushes people out of the way as he runs to the bathroom)
- Rapid-Fire "No!": Danny unleashes one while watching a sports game, and follows it up with a Big "NO!".
Danny: Damn the referee! DAMN HIM IN THE ASS! Damn it!
- Running Gag:
- There are several videos in which Danny's ex-wife comes over to talk about her problems with work or family. Every time, Danny completely fails to show interest or sympathy.
Danny: Are we gonna fuck, or what?
Danny: (more concerned with the TV than Shirlena) I COULD SHIT A BETTER KOOL-AID COMMERCIAL!
- Also, on several occasions clips of Danny swearing are replayed three times.
- Screw Politeness Im A Senior: Danny's father certainly lives by this trope.
- Shoe Slap: "I'll throw my shoe at your faggot ass!"
- Shockingly Expensive Toast:
Danny's Dad: $2 for a piece of toast!? BULL SHIT!
- Sir Swears-a-Lot: Ya think?
- Slapstick: Danny is on the receiving end of a lot physical comedy: his chair falls over, his beer spews foam on him, a bird flies into his face, he bangs his head on a chandelier, he drunkenly falls down stairs, a supermarket cardboard standup falls on him, and more. The cameraman sometimes takes punishment, too.
- So Was X: This conversation between Danny's son and Danny's dad:
- Speaking Like Totally Teen: Danny's dad hits on a black woman with a big ass by trying to sound black himself. He gets an Armor-Piercing Slap for his efforts.
Danny's dad: Damn, bitch! You got a STUPID fat ass!
- That Came Out Wrong: When Danny gets hit in the groin by a roll of paper towels.
Danny: Where's the paper towels?!
Danny's Son: They're right over here, Dad, in this bag.
Danny: Throw 'em over here!
Danny's son throws him the paper towels, and it hits him in the groin
Danny: Ouch! Motherfucker, you hit me in the dick!
Danny's Son: Sorry...
: You're lucky it wasn't hard! (Beat
) I mean this thing (the paper towels), not my dick!
- Two Decades Behind: There's a definite retro vibe going on. Pop culture references are dated to the 80s (Unsolved Mysteries, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Alf...) and in one episode Danny is seen watching a Kool-Aid commercial from that decade. The Stinger of one episode features a Frosted Flakes commercial with a foul-mouthed voiceover given to Tony the Tiger, who now has Tourette's.
- Unusual Euphemism: He replaces most of his usual profanity with "OH, BOB SAGET!" for one video.
- "EAT MY SHORT DICK!"
- "Suck my cocks!" Apparently he has more than one.
- Verbal Tic: The first two times the phone rings when Danny is rooting around in the fridge, he seems unable to stop himself from saying "Fashion Bug" in response. On the third ring, he seem to have broken the habit, and instead says he'd "like to find the mother fucker who named it Fashion Bug and shove a broom up his ass!"
- When All You Have Is a Hammer: When a bird flies into the house, Danny's reaction is to first try and down it with a thrown beer bottlenote and then try swatting it with a broom... in a room filled with fragile objects. The results are what you'd expect them to be.
Danny's son: Dad, you're gonna break everything in the whole house!
Danny: I'M TOO PISSED TO GIVE A SHIT! (the bird flies into his face) OH FUCK! DAMN IT!
- Who Forgot the Lights?: In one skit when the lights are turned off, Danny starts swearing loudly in the dark.
- Who Names Their Kid "Dude"?: Danny takes a low and suicidal opinion on people with the name "Combs". (This despite liking a song performed by Sean "Puff Daddy" Combs; see "Atomic F-Bomb" above.)
Danny's Son: Dad, I heard henote killed himself...
Danny: I'd kill myself, too, if my last name was................ COOOOMBS.
- Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: "I'm not afraid of SHIT! ...Except snakes."
"HOLY SHIT!!! I gotta go! Some squirrel's fucking my tomatoes!"