"Darius Dunn is a master of deception, Leonardo. But you must have faith that he will trip up someday... and when he does, we will be there."
— Splinter, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Fast Forward
"Yeah, reach out for me! I'm a snake! Never trust a snake!"
— Jake "The Snake" Roberts, WWF Superstars
"I've triumphed! Finally I am a very wealthy man which means that everybody must do as I say! I think I'll buy myself a new car with an extra powerful engine so that I can exceed the legal speed limit and an extra thick bumper so that I can ram into people without getting it scratched. And I shall name the car Count Olaf after myself so that when people hear the scream of brakes they'll shout "Look out! Here comes Count Olaf! Orphans! Head for the nearest luxury car retailer!"
— Count Olaf, A Series of Unfortunate Events
"Sorry, I couldn't hear you over the sound of my plan working!"
—Sterling Archer, Archer
"My problem? I don't know! I don't have a problem, Dale. Actually, I have the opposite of a problem. I made over 550K last year! How much did you make? I am the VP of the biggest executive-helicopter-leasing company on the Western Seaboard! I haven't had a carb since 2004!"
—Derek Huff, Step Brothers
"How's it feel to be an independent, Schoenstein?"
—Doug Neidermeyer, Animal House
"John, when you get shut down, come back and talk to me. I could always use a good meter maid."
—Chief Bruce Grady, Super Troopers
Luke Skywalker: Your overconfidence is your weakness.
Darth Sidious: Your faith in your friends is yours!
Nadine Cross: They're coming for you, you know. The old woman sent them before she died.
Randall Flagg: Get your ass back in here.
Nadine Cross: Everything you've made here is falling apart. They're saying a simple retarded boy outwitted Randall Flagg. They're saying Judge Farris got away from your man in Idaho.
Randall Flagg: He's as dead as Judas Iscariot.
Nadine Cross: They're asking questions about Dayna, too. It's all slipping through your fingers. And they're whispering, Randy. I can see them, leaving their posts in the dead of night, and your eye can't see them. And when they come here — Stu… and Ralph… and Glen… and La— when they get here, your time will end, and I'll be watching. I'll be watching from Hell, with your baby in my arms!
Joe Friday: Just like every other foaming, rabid psycho in this city with a foolproof plan, you've forgotten you're facing the single finest fighting force ever assembled.
Jonathan Whirley: The Israelis?
Joe Friday: Try the decent, hard-working men and women of Los Angeles.
Jonathan Whirley: Forgotten them? My dear sergeant, I'm absolutely counting on them!
Marianne: You're going to hell!
Olive: Just as long as YOU won't be there.
Marianne: I can assure you, I won't!
"You're the talk of the town, Jak; you give the people hope. How pathetic! I would've enjoyed killing you in prison, but now, it'll be so much more fun to take you on the track, in front of the entire city! I can hear the roar of the crowd now, as everyone sees their hope die."
—Erol, Jak and Daxter
"Using defensive spells? Why, I can't imagine any situation arising in my classroom that would require you to use a defensive spell, Miss Granger. You surely aren't expecting to be attacked during class? I do not wish to criticize the way things have been run in this school, but you have been exposed to some very irresponsible wizards in this class, very irresponsible indeed - not to mention, extremely dangerous half-breeds."
— Dolores Umbridge, Harry Potter
"My sister. My dear sister. Oh, she'll think she's so great, won't she?"
— Jim Taggart, Atlas Shrugged
"You do NOT tell your elders what to do!"
—Davina Marr, Skulduggery Pleasant
"Why do you continue to fight us, Reclaimer? You cannot win! Give us the construct, and I will endeavor to make your death relatively painless."
— 343 Guilty Spark, Halo: Combat Evolved
"I am strong. I am wise. I am lovely. And most importantly, I am right! ...Me! No one else!"
—Narcian, Fire Emblem: Binding Blade
"I don't distrust you because you're a woman. I distrust you because you're not as smart as you think you are."
—Tywin Lannister to Cersei Lannister, Game of Thrones