"He whisked off her shoes and panties in one movement, wild like an enraged shark, his bulky totem beating a seductive rhythm. Mary's body felt like it was burning, even though the room was properly air-conditioned. They tried all the positions: on top, doggy, and normal. Exhausted, they collapsed onto the recently extended sofa bed. Then, a hell-beast ate them."
Shawn: Virgins are always safe.
Cory: Thanks for saving me, Topanga.
Jack: I'm dead.
Eric: I'm dead.
Shawn: I'll get as sick as you can get without actually dying.
Cory: Thanks for saving me, Topanga.
Jack: I'm dead.
Eric: I'm dead.
Shawn: I'll get as sick as you can get without actually dying.
— Boy Meets World, "And Then There was Shawn"
"Don't forget, folks,
that's what you get, folks,
for makin' whoopie."
that's what you get, folks,
for makin' whoopie."
— Gus Kahn, "Makin' Whoopee"
"Why do axe murderers only attack when we're making love?"
— Camper Van Beethoven, "Axe Murderer Song"
"No sex!"
— Father Malius, Happy Hell Night
"You're going to have sex? Don't! Every time someone has sex in a horror story they get murdered!"
— Barney, Evil Laugh
"Dead man, I'm a dead man."
— The joking reply to ways to survive a horror movie in Scream (1996).
Richie: How much pheromone do you think I should put on?
Eddie: Well I’ve already put on half—a—bottle.
Richie: What! Are you insane? You’ll be dead by morning – death by sex! You’ll just be lying there and they’ll be doing it to you and doing it to you and doing it to you and⋯ I think I’ll put on half—a—bottle as well!
Eddie: Well I’ve already put on half—a—bottle.
Richie: What! Are you insane? You’ll be dead by morning – death by sex! You’ll just be lying there and they’ll be doing it to you and doing it to you and doing it to you and⋯ I think I’ll put on half—a—bottle as well!
—Bottom, “Smells”
"Death to all teenagers who fuck!"
— The Lawnmower Killer, Wacko
"Don't have sex. You will get pregnant and die."
—Coach Carr, Mean Girls
"Nancy, you can't be the final girl. It's not in your DNA, or whatever. You're the shy girl with the clipboard and the guitar. You get laid and then you die. You're just part of the body count. No offense."
—Vicki Summers, The Final Girls
Max Cartwright: You shouldn't have sex.
Nancy: Why?
Max: Because I heard that sex can kill you.
Nancy: Why?
Max: Because I heard that sex can kill you.
"The last guy I saw get kissed got stabbed in the head with two knives."
—Cole, The Babysitter (2017)
