Quotes / Ineffectual Death Threats

"It's nice to have a friend to help you get to heaven...
A special friend who's got an AK-47..."
— "Sock's Jingle", The Stephanie Miller Show

Han Solo: Welcome aboard Mon Remonda. Let's get the rest of your pilots in... so I can get out of this torture suit.
Wedge Antilles: But, sir, I was just going to say how smart you looked in your uniform. I think we ought to stay here, in uniform, a couple of hours so the holographers can capture the image. You know, for the historians.
Han: Wedge, I think I'm going to have you killed.
Wedge: Yes, sir. I trust you'll wear your dress uniform for an event like that.

"Every night for the next year he always said something like that to me: 'Thank you for everything, Westley, good night now, I'll probably kill you in the morning.'"
Westley, The Princess Bride

"EEEEEEENGH! I'll strangle that Clyde Cash!"
Christian Weston Chandler, Sonichu

Oh, not now, Locksley! "Oh, I will kill you! I'm going to kill you, I mean it!"
The Sheriff, Robin Hood

Superman: Oh don't even- I will freeze breath your face off.
Batman: No you won't.
Superman: ...You're right, I won't. I love this guy. Up top!
Tarrant: You have ten seconds or I'll open fire.
Vila: With what?
Blake's 7, "Warlord"