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Anime and Manga
If being smart means what you say... I'll remain a fool my entire life!
— Naruto Uzumaki, Naruto
Ash: But if you've known Sabrina since she was a little girl, then that means...
Sabrina's Father: So you figured it out, eh?
Ash: Then you must have taken her baby pictures, too!
Sabrina's Father: (facefault) JUST HOW DENSE CAN A PERSON BE?!
I'm fine with being stupid! I'm going to keep meeting challenges and keep marching forward!
— Hareta, Pokémon: Diamond and Pearl Adventure!
Film — Animated
I think I got it... but just in case... tell me the whole thing again, I wasn't listening.
— Emmet, The LEGO Movie
Film — Live Action
Nerves of steel. Body of iron. Brain of stone.
— Tagline for Who's Harry Crumb?
Live-Action TV
It's funny, you know, but before I met you I was even willing to be impressed!
—Romana, Doctor Who ("The Ribos Operation")
Jimmy the Robot: They weren't mad about the dynamite, Commander. They were mad because you made the problem worse!
MC Bat Commander: What are you suggesting, robot?
Jimmy the Robot: Just that you may want to plan before you make decisions.
MC Bat Commander: Planning takes time that men of action don't have! Being quick on your feet, and making split second decisions, that's what makes a true leader!
(later)
MC Bat Commander: Jimmy, why are we stopped?
Jimmy the Robot: Because we're out of gas, Commander.
MC Bat Commander: See, Jimmy? Planning can't solve all our problems.
MC Bat Commander: What are you suggesting, robot?
Jimmy the Robot: Just that you may want to plan before you make decisions.
MC Bat Commander: Planning takes time that men of action don't have! Being quick on your feet, and making split second decisions, that's what makes a true leader!
(later)
MC Bat Commander: Jimmy, why are we stopped?
Jimmy the Robot: Because we're out of gas, Commander.
MC Bat Commander: See, Jimmy? Planning can't solve all our problems.
— The Aquabats! Super Show!, "Cowboy Android!"
Video Games
Where's the fun in thinking BEFORE you do something?
— Pixel, Graffiti Kingdom
You're surprisingly dull-witted.
— The King of Red Lions, The Legend Of Zelda: The Wind Waker
Lightning: What's Snow thinking?
Lumina: Oh, he isn't.
Lumina: Oh, he isn't.
Dekar: You should spend less time laughing! Then you wouldn't get taken out so easily, you idiot!
Guy: Ha! Ya got called an idiot by an idiot, Idura!
Dekar: Hey, Guy! Did you just call me an idiot?!
Guy: Ha! I'm only kiddin', Dekar! I'd never call ya an idiot!
Dekar: I see. I must've misunderstood your joke.
Guy: Ha! Ya got called an idiot by an idiot, Idura!
Dekar: Hey, Guy! Did you just call me an idiot?!
Guy: Ha! I'm only kiddin', Dekar! I'd never call ya an idiot!
Dekar: I see. I must've misunderstood your joke.
Naive, as usual. Whether you believe me is of no import. Just do not stand in my way.
— Grolla to Spiritia, RosenkreuzStilette
What's an airport, again?
—Andy, Advance Wars
I don't know why I'm taking this chance on an invalid... I'll explain again.
— Silus, Fallout: New Vegas
Webcomics
I knew I'd regret helping this idiot!
— Candy, Save the Princess
"Stop badmouthing idiots, you spoiled brats! Some of the most competent soldiers I've had the privilege to serve with were idiots. As long as they know their craft they can be excellent, loyal employees."
— Trond Andersen, Stand Still, Stay Silent
Web Original
Oh my goodness! Spidey is about to be unmasked by his most dangerous and powerful super-foe … Ha ha, just kidding, obviously. Spidey has actually managed to knock himself unconscious by accident, and will be unmasked by a random child as he lies supine in a fetid alleyway in a puddle of his own failure.
Chris: Uzi, at this point, can we agree that Clark is basically really dumb?
David: They say flight is the last power to show up, but at this point I’m just hoping to see regular intelligence, never mind super-intelligence.
Chris: Seriously, just picking up an artifact from a dead, technologically advanced civilization and goofing around with it as soon as you see it is quite possibly the stupidest thing we’ve seen Clark do, and that includes referring to himself as “The Blur.”
David: They say flight is the last power to show up, but at this point I’m just hoping to see regular intelligence, never mind super-intelligence.
Chris: Seriously, just picking up an artifact from a dead, technologically advanced civilization and goofing around with it as soon as you see it is quite possibly the stupidest thing we’ve seen Clark do, and that includes referring to himself as “The Blur.”
—Chris Sims and David Uzumeri on Smallville ("Luthor")
I would think if you had one mission in life, that mission being kill the Antichrist or all life dies, you might train a bit. I would personally move to Asia and only come back when I have in fact become a ninja like Batman. That being said I do set high goals for myself. But I would personally be happy if the assassins for Christ were not middle aged fat asses who have gorged on too many communion wafers. These guys aren’t just out of shape, they are klutzes to boot. Let me give you an example. So Damien is getting interviewed on some news program and one of the monks has found a way onto the set. For some reason the monk thinks he should go on the rafters above the set. Why? I guess a thirty foot leap off the balcony with a dagger was a better option than just running up and stabbing Damien but whatever. While he is up there, he trips, gets his foot caught in some of the rigging and he swings from the rafters. While this is happening he knocks over some stage lights which set the curtains on fire. The monk swings around, wraps himself in plastic sheeting, swings over to the burning curtains, then sets himself on fire which simultaneously burns him and shrink wraps him to death. That had nothing to do with Satan or evil forces; the dude was just a dumbass.
Dear god, Ash. How do you even breath?
— PokéSins on episode 60 of the anime.
"Like all prisoners in the castle, I'm outfitted with an exploding collar. Ha! The fools, my head is the least dangerous part of my body."
Web Video
That's our hero, ladies and gentlemen: too stupid to eat!
— Noah Antwiler on a scene of Tidus choking on his food, Final Fantasy X
The events of the game try to convince me that Cobra's awesome, but he just keeps working against it.
Just why the hell is Crash Bandicoot so gullible to help out Cortex to begin with? Well, because Crash is dumb, no ifs, ands or buts.
I've had idiot protagonists I've despised, and ones I've loved, and I've found two commonalities for why I love the ones I do. [...] #1: Know who and what you're writing. This could also be "Know how your character comes off". [...] A character being an idiot isn't bad writing, bad writing is mishandling that fact. Neuro knows James is an idiot, it's going places with it. Get excited. #2: Be an idiot along the way, not in the way. [...] This isn't a call to make games as short as possible, cutting out all the fluff. No, I'm not that much of a curmudgeon. It's about how progress is framed. A player fighting so the player character can undercut their progress is rarely a rewarding experience. [...] If a protagonist is a window through which to view a setting, James has the curtains drawn.
— TehSnakerer on Neuro: The Lost Last Game of 2006 (Is Weird)
Okay, duly noted: Henry's incredibly incompetent! [...] Our protagonist is an idiot."
— Pink Kitty Rose on Henry Stickmin, following the Grenade FAIL in Escaping the Prison
Western Animation
I think we're dealing with a very very very very smart person, or a very very very very stupid person.
— Model Robot, Perfect Hair Forever
Jake: Finn, don't do anything stupid!
Finn: I can't help it man! I'm all about stupid!
Finn: I can't help it man! I'm all about stupid!
—Adventure Time, "The Real You"
You know all that stuff I said about you being Earth’s last hope? I’ve changed my mind. Let me drive.
— Kiva to Coop, Megas XLR
Too bad I'm all the way up here, and you're dumb.
— Mumm-Ra to Lion-O, ThunderCats Roar
Real Life
When Yokum speaks, he speaks for millions of morons.
— Al Capp, creator of Li'l Abner
They're the kind of characters who look... stupid, really, but they're not stupid, just... simple. And all they really want to do is just focus on doing their job, no matter what.
— Michel Ancel, on the protagonists of Rayman Origins
They actually did an interview where Sid, the supposed top baby face, was so stupid he couldn’t find the arena. He kept calling in from his cell phone saying he was lost. 'Guys, can you hear me?' he asked in at least three different segments. Clearly, nobody in the company ever learned that the one thing fans will absolutely not support is an idiot babyface.
—The Death of WCW, on Sid Eudy
