Unnecessary Time Precision
Rincewind: Exactly how long have you been a barbarian hero?
Nijel the Destroyer: Er. What year is this?
Rincewind: Out on the road, then? Lost track of time? I know how it is. This is the year of the Hyena.
Oh, in that case about... about three days.
Alice asks Bob how long something has been going on. Bob asks Alice what time/day it is, and Alice tells him.
Bob's response then reveals that whatever information Alice gave him is irrelevant.
Not to be confused with Ludicrous Precision
- The Little Rascals movie:
Butch: When's the last time we beat you up?
Alfalfa: Well, let's see...today's the 10th...30 days hath September, April, June and November...it's not a leap year...yesterday.
- Scrooged: "Listen, I know I haven't talked to you in... *checks watch* ...about 10 or 15 years, but..."
- In Woody Allen's Love and Death:
Countess Alexandrovna: How long has it been since you've made love to a woman?
Boris: What's today? Monday, Tuesday...two years.
- From Zookeeper
Griffin: How long have you been able to talk??
Monkey: Let's see, today's Tuesday, so, ummm...always.
- Terry Pratchett uses this trope regularly.
- In addition to the quote from Sourcery...
- In Interesting Times, Rincewind asks Cohen the Barbarian how old he is. What century is it? Ninety to 95 years.
- In Discworld/Night Watch, Vimes asks when Dibbler Enterprises, Est. was established. What year is it? Tuesday.
- Two and a Half Men
Alan: How about this: When was the last time you called her just to see how she was doing?
Charlie: Uh, whoo. What's today, Sunday? Then never.
- Friends, "The One With The Thumb":
Joey: So when do we get to meet the guy?
Monica: Let's see, today's Monday... never.
- Red vs. Blue:
Washington: How long have you been here?
Church: How long? Um... What day is today?
Washington: Today is Tuesday.
Church: I've been here 14 months.
- Adventures in Odyssey "Aloha Oy!"
Donna: How many years have you lived in Hawaii Mr. Iowa?
Don Iowa: Oh the islands we don't measure time in years but in full moons.
Donna: Okay, how many full moons have you lived here?
Don Iowa: Hm, about three years worth.
- Llamas with Hats
- While not technically time-based, this conversation rings of it:
Paul: ...Where are all the other lifeboats, Carl?
Carl: Well, judging by the trajectory of the moon and the stars, I'd say... somewhere at the bottom of the ocean. I bit lots of holes in them.
- Frisky Dingo, Second season:
Interviewer: Well, it's been a year now-
Xander: A Year?! It's really been a whole year? What's today?
Xander: Oh my God, it has been a year.