Roger Luss squeaking "What the shit?!" while he's being attacked by vampires. Not exactly the sort of noise you'd expect from the guy who once played Galen Tyrol!
Nora's mother's reaction to the arrival of Abe and the others. "Who are these people? I'm not cooking for them!"
Fet going with Premium gasoline (which he purchases on Eph's credit card) to burn the attacking strigoi.
Unintentional or not, there is just something hilarious about Eph and Nora spontaneously having sex in his ex-wife's bedroom, right after killing said ex-wife's boyfriend (who'd been converted into a vampire) and burning his corpse.
Gus returns some stolen property to Setrakian, whose only response is to say: "Well, I imagine that's the only good news this day will bring." and then leaves without so much as a "thank you."
Equally funny is Gus's reply: "You're welcome... asshole."
Eichhorst and Eldritch Palmer have a chat. The Faux Affably Evil bleeds through the screen to hilarious effect.
Eichhorst: Eldritch! Look at you! How are you feeling?
Eldritch: I expected it to be quite traumatic to say the least, but I feel wonderful!
Of course, watching Palmer get taken down a peg two seconds later is equally as amusing (as well as his absentmindedly waving a silver knife around, causing Eichhorst to cautiously back away in the most hilarious manner possible)....
Eldritch: I thought it would be much more traumatic! When does my (points at his throat) come in?
Eichhorst: I'm afraid you've been mistaken, you've been given the white, not the worm.
Eldritch:*jaw drops*
Palmer throwing the Secretary of Health off a building. Black Humor at its best! Special mention must also go to Eichhorst snarking his way through a conversation with Dr. Barnes:
Dr. Barnes: How long have you been in Mr. Palmer's employ?
Eichhorst: Oh, I'm not in his employ.
Dr. Barnes: *Beat* Huh. Your accent, are you German?
Eichhorst: Originally.
Dr. Barnes: I went to Munich for a conference once... Didn't like it.
Eichhorst:*Disdainful* You wouldn't.
Season 2
In the Season 2 premiere, in which Sektrakian meets the three New World Ancients, he asks them if they know how to kill the Master. Vaun deadpans that for "obvious reasons" they're not going to tell him.
This exchange between Setrakian and Gus:
Setrakian: You're the idiot brother of the man child who stole my clock.
Gus: (indignant) I gave you back your clock.
Vaun: Okay, shut up. Let's go.
While he's getting ready to head out, Eph starts ordering Dutch around and telling her to look after Zach (while she's working on a big project of her own). This happens:
Eph: Dutch? You could use some ventilation.
Dutch: Mm, yeah, and a latte with almond milk and a massage from the Four Seasons.
Eph: When Zach gets up, make sure he has some breakfast.
Dutch: Where are you going?
Eph: Out.
Dutch: Got it. I'll just feed your kid and make sure this place is vampire safe for you.
Eph: Is there a problem?
Dutch: I never said there was a problem. If there was a problem, I'd say there was a problem. God, you're so bloody presumptuous!
Eichhorst's annoyance with Palmer flirting with a real estate broker rather than closing an important deal.
Really, the whole Eichhorst vs. Palmer dynamic is gold. You can almost hear Eichhorst's "Bitch, please" when Palmer starts blustering on about how he's now the Master's "partner" after being given a drop of the Master's blood.
Eph and Dutch amused reaction when, while spying on him, they find out that Palmer is trying to fix his breaking-up with his girlfriend (her secretary Coco). They waste no time in getting snarker about it.
Eph: (to Dutch) Seems you aren't the only one with a broken heart.
Dutch: Having an affair with the secretary... What a cliche.
Fet's dialogue while planting the explosives in the subway tunnel.
Setrakian: I prefer to think of it is as recovering a stolen artifact, but yes, we're going to rob the son of a bitch.
Fet: (snickers with glee)
While Fet and Dutch help Feraldo's NYPD Strike Team clear out a Red Hook apartment complex, they discuss the benefits of silver with the team leader Kowalski, who clearly favors the shoot them in head school of thought...until they find a small nest at the bottom of an elevator shaft and he sees the devastating effects of one of the silver grenades Dutch had brought along.
Kowalski: Okay now I get the silver.
Season 3
Episode 3x04: An exasperated Eichhorst struggles to get the feral strigoi to pay attention to his instructions. This follows the apparent "death" of the Master in the previous episode.
Also in 3:04: When Quinlan wakes up on a kitchen table after an even which by rights should have killed him his first questions is whether he's alive. The second: "My weapons?" Neither at that point of in the following conversation with Setrakian does Quinlan react in any way to the fact that he is naked apart from a strategically placed towel. Doubles as fanservice.
Episode 3x05:
Fet taunting a couple of strigoi after electronically tagging them:
Fet: "Later, my bitches!"
Eichhorst is having a meeting with Palmer, when the latter's failing health catches up with him:
Eichhorst: Are you alright, Eldritch?
(Palmer faints. Beat while Eichhorst stares at him.)
Eichhorst: (calmly) Nurse!
Episode 3:07: When Eph finds a little stash of wodka bottles in an office, he offers one to Dutch and then (mockingly) asks Quinlan "Ever drink a drunk?". Mildly funny, but gets a lot more so when you realize that comming from someone who spends half his scenes with a drink in hand, this question could be misconstrued.
Season 4
Episode 4x07: In an otherwise very serious scene, right after the Master effortlessly disarms Alonso Creem, he gives Creem a shrug and a look that says, "Nice try". Heck, the fact that the Master let Creem try to make a deal with him just to see how deep his delusions are.
Meta
Richard Sammel (Eichhorst) tweeted: "#thomaseichhorst recommends episode 7 of #thestrain tomorrow (August 17) 10pm on FX. Bloody positive greetings". The next day, he corrected himself by tweeting "Today (August 17) is episode 6 of the strain. Vampires can't count. Recommendations anyhow". He's also tweeted thanking people for being so "(B)-positive" about the show.
This commercial, where Eichhorst has turned his murder dungeon into an Air BnB to make ends meet.
This interview, where he casually says that Eichhorst tutoring vamp!Kelly is "[compensating] for the fact that he can't fuck anymore". It's just so out of left field.
Also, the fact that he's nicknamed the two of them "The Vampire Bonnie and Clyde".
The cast gave tips on how to survive, which was pretty much comedy gold:
Guillermo Del Toro: Warm up your hands before going into a fist fight because it gives you a little flexibility on the knuckles. [...] And I'm Mexican, so I've been in many fist fights!
Mia Maestro: Drink tea! Some lovely, organic, living tea in a bowl and just drink it in silence.
Corey Stoll: Make sure you have a lot of singles on you. *Beat* My survival tips really have more to do with getting a table at a restaurant in New York rather than with anything primal.
Natalie Brown: Run. [...] Also, be proficient in the use of kitchen utensils. *Beat* I like the cutting board!
, where Eichhorst has turned his murder dungeon into an Air BnB to make ends meet.