- In "Splashdown":
Little Pete: (while holding an electric eel, preparing to disrupt adult swim) Who likes electric eels?(Everyone panics and rushes to get out of the pool; Mr. Wrigley raises his hand, then joins the panicking adults in fleeing.)
- Artie dancing to the marching band playing "Love Roller Coaster" in "Day of the Dot".
- ..."attracted Artie like a giant funk magnet."
- Let's just go ahead and include anything involving Artie.
- Stu: "Who wants to be a bus driver when you could be a bear!?"
- Stu: "Attention passengers, there will be some new regulations: Will passengers please refrain from KILLING MY SOUL?!
- "You're made of straw!" and the rampage that ensues.
- "Grueling coordination tests." "IT WAS A CRULLER! YOU PUT A CRULLER THERE!" Hell, everything Stu does and says in "Yellow Fever" qualifies.
- This classic line from a little girl in "Range Boy": "I can smell his fear, mommy. It smells like bacon."
- The Mail Lady trying to escape the earths gravity in "The Call"
- The Cowboy from the same episode.
- In "The Big Quiet", Teddy reveals that he and his dad participate in therapy, involving sock puppets:
Teddy: If I say something dumb, he'll treat me like a kid!Teddy's Dad: But you ARE a kid.Teddy: No, I'm not, I'm a talking sock!*pans to therapist*Therapist: Gooooooood!*cuts back to Teddy with the gang*Teddy: It's not so bad; you get to keep the sock.
- This exchange from "Time Tunnel", in which Stu explains to Big Pete his plans now that Sally's dumped him again:
Stu: I'm going to drive to Alaska, tattoo her name to my chest, tie myself to a glacier and drift slowly out to sea.Pete: Mind dropping me off before then?Stu: You sure? I brought sandwiches.
- "Congratulations, Mr. Wrigley. You're dead."
- So funny in the simplicity of its execution: In the midst of the escalating prank war between the Petes' Dad and Ellen's Dad in "Apocalypse Pete", Little Pete has Artie push Ellen's home sideways by a little more than an inch off; the "change" so miniscule that it only had actor Toby Huss put his weight on the house's side wall to depict it. (So not even the show's only occasional lite special effects were required!) The payoff comes when Little Pete and his Dad watch through their hidden camera Ellen's Dad (played by Steve Buscemi) bemused to find his daily coming-home-from-work routine being disrupted when he places his key a little more than an inch off his front door's keyhole!
- In "35 Hours", Big Pete has to resort to asking Endless Mike for help getting rid of the family who bought the Wrigley home from Little Pete. Endless Mike mulls it over — while caressing a taxidermy cat — and asks if Pete wants a refill. The camera pans down to reveal that in return for the request, Mike has subjected Pete to several pounds of ice stuffed down the front of his pants.
Funny / The Adventures of Pete & Pete
This show has many: