Funny / So I Married an Axe Murderer

  • The Alcatraz tour, full stop.
  • "Let's get pissed!"
  • "We have a piper down!"
  • "That boy's heed is like an orange on a toothpick!"
  • "Because he puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes you crave it fortnightly, smartarse!"
  • Practically anything Stuart says or does can easily qualify, really.
  • (about haggis) "I think most Scottish cuisine is based on a dare."