- Colin Lane performing Thriller, with his teammates as backup dancers. It can be viewed here. It crosses over with Waxing Lyrical as the song isn't obvious straight away.
- Wil Anderson and Adam Spencer in a memorable round of Clash Of The Titans. The first part can be found here, along with the (so far only) round of Know Your Enemy which can be best summed up by Paul's response afterward.
Paul: "We've never played a round like that before on the show, and I don't know if we ever will again. That was funny as fuck, and no one got any points."
Wil: I have a question. Is 'handjob' one word or two?
- These examples are both from the most recent series. If you want older Crowning Moments of Funny, go back to the old ABC days. The first episode that paired Johanna Sweet with James O'Loughlin, and the ongoing joke that Johanna's mother watched the show. Or the "breast" episode from '98, with O'Loughlin, Tanya Bulmer, Jennifer Burns and George Negus. Talking breasts and cream-pies for the win, people.
Paul: It's a difficult word, "Clitoris", it's not easy to say, hard to get the tongue around, but kids, keep trying.
- WWE's The Miz plays a game
- Shaun Micallef's verbal jousting with Paul when he got him on the couch.
Paul: [playing word association] Envy.
Shaun: [sighing and gesticulating] ...I got nothing with 'envy'. [beat] Maybe you're not saying it properly.
- The 'Julia-off' between Claire Bowditch and Corinne Grant.
- Paul mentioning that it was a good thing that Tony Abbott didn't go to Afghanistan, as the temptation of the Australian soldiers there to 'shoot the little fucker in the head' would have been a bit too much...
- Paul explains the message of the 'Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oi Oi Oi' chant.
Paul: We're Australian, there are several of us, and oi.
- This response to "How do you know if you're dating a vampire?"
"He only wants to go down on you once a month."
- The response by the men was just as funny- all of them minus Paul gathered around the Spot and started holding out their hands to it like it was a campfire, making comments such as 'That's the hottest the Spot has ever been'.
- Paul then decides to throw out a question about when it's okay to drink someone's blood.
- Everything said between "And then the glitter balls will be brought out, unless the dogs have licked them clean" and the adverts.
- Paul "Thursday is national no meat day, hug a lesbian."
- The ending to the buzzers of death played during the 2008 finale, before crossing the wires Paul had a hood put over his head and stood in water. When he crossed the wires the sparks came down and hit... Mikey sending him flying.
- Any time Sammy J and Randy the purple puppet make an appearance.
- In one episode, the clue involved DeAnne Smith walking on a treadmill with Dave Thornton holding a disco ball on the end of a fishing pole in front of her.
Mikey: It's like you're fishing for gay men.
: "How'd you go today, Dave?" "Oh, I caught three of the Village People
- After a news story involving Ita Buttrose's new book, Claire turned out to be the only one who'd actually read it. Before she could tell the other panelists what was in it, Jason Byrne commented on her lack of etiquette and pulled her elbows off the bench. She got corrected on etiquette by Jason Byrne.
- The beginning of one episode had happy, dancing Paul skipping around singing, "A carbon tax, a carbon tax, we're all going to have a carbon tax!"
- Two weeks later, the intro had him mournfully singing, "A carbon tax, a carbon tax, we were going to have a carbon tax..."
- Fiona O'Loughlin singing "Toxic" by Britney Spears, accompanied by two backup singers, Mikey in a spider suit dancing along, and Paul attempting to dance, including grabbing a camera and thrusting it repeatedly into his crotch. Basically, it's the best performance of "Toxic" ever.
- Amanda Palmer singing "True Colours" and then playing it on kazoo.
- Mikey. Giant inflatable panda suit. Enough said.
- Wil Anderson telling DeAnne Smith (who is a lesbian) that he feels kind of bad because he dresses more like a lesbian than she does.
- Lehmo and Josh Thomas in the game 'Blow Up Your Pants', which requires the person or people in the booth to catch a piece of paper with a letter on it. Paul then asks them questions, and their answers must begin with that letter. Josh got S. Lehmo got Q.
- The following conversation (please note that Josh is gay).
Josh Thomas: I'm feeling kind of awkward about how sporty this show is.
Paul: You think it's too sporty?
Josh: I think like, they got the other three (Liz Ellis, a champion netballer, Lehmo, a sports commentator, and Eamon Sullivan, an Olympic swimmer) and then they went "Oh, we'll... we'll get Josh."
Eamon Sullivan: I dunno, I heard you've got good ball-handling skills.
- Ross Noble and the Foam Cannon. These two quotes pretty much say it all.
Mikey (as Ross sprays the foam): This is like the world's worst porno!
Paul (attempting to read the scores off of a soaked card): It's - honestly, it's gone. I think it's 107. And I've taken all their points away because of Ross and his foam, it got a bit out of control, so they've got four.
- In one game of Buzzers of Death, Paul got shocked. It was hilarious (and for added points, he didn't get shocked on the arm or side, it was his ear).
Mikey: Are you OK there?
: I can't hear a fucking
word you're saying.
- Julia Morris performing 'Send In The Clowns'.
- "Players, on your knees!" "What?"
- Any time Border Insecurity is played. Australian expressions are hysterically funny, and watching whichever poor bastard's playing trying to figure them out is too funny.
- Once on '7 Things For The Bin', Denise Scott complained about 'metrosexual man-bags' (metro guys with handbags trying to look manly). Paul demonstrated how ridiculous these look by imitating having a handbag slung over one arm and posing like a model, much to everyone's mirth.
- From one round of 'Little Pricks':
Paul: How many players are there in a netball team?
Paul: Who wrote the books Stardust, Coraleen-
- From the 2012 Final Farewell Tour show: Jason Byrne's playing of So You Think You Can Mime, in which he's miming a story about an engineer's idea for a rollercoaster designed for voluntary euthanasia. Mikey's team is so confused on what's he's miming, when they finally do get a word, Paul quips this:
"I'd just like to say at this point, we have the word 'rollercoaster', only 47 more words to go."