Funny / Four Rooms

Pictured: the consequences of misbehaving.

As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked as per policy. You Have Been Warned.

• Nearly everything involving Ted's reactions to the situations he finds himself in.
• From "The Missing Ingredient":
  • "So, you're telling me you were supposed to bring..." (Points down) "...hmm...and you..." (Gulp) "...hmm?"
  • The witches' rhymes.
• From "The Wrong Man":
  • Ted's dance before he enters the room, smoke and all.
  • The random flash of Ted holding a baby dressed identically to him, when he gets knocked out.
  • "I..." "Ah..." "Theodore..." "Theodaw..."
  • Ted's Berserk Button rant about his own name.
  • The wife's Hurricane of Euphemisms rant.
• From "The Misbehavers":
  • "You want five hundred bucks?" (Ted shrugs) "...Sure!"
  • The haggling over the money and the "situation".
  • The out-of-the-blue crossover with "The Wrong Man", as we find out who called Siegfried about the needles.
  • Having told the children that they shouldn't disturb him unless someone died, Ted receives a call from their room very late in the night, and we get this gem of a dialogue:
  Ted: What do you want now, for Christ's sake! Who died?
  Sarah (hysterically): I don't know, but she's in my bed!
  Ted: What?
  Sarah: There's a dead body in my bed!
  Ted: That's just your brother, sound asleep!
  Ted (coming up, to himself): If there is no dead body in that room by the time I get up there, I'm gonna make one!
  • Blacked out from all the booze and your body being carried by your husband as a sack of potatoes? Still not a reason not to hold tight to the bottle!
  • The punch line of the gangster opening the door to see the room torn apart and destroyed...and then, in a calm and casual tone as if none of it's registered with him:
  "Did they misbehave?"
• The phone conversation between Ted, who is stressed out of his mind, and Margaret, who is stoned out of her mind.
• From "The Man From Hollywood":
  • Ted taking a moment to stop his rant about all the craziness that's happened so far in the movie to note that incident with the witches was actually "pretty bloody good".
  • Ted's reaction to the return of Siegfried's wife.
  • The party favor Running Gag.
  • Chester's constant Serious Business about the champagne.
  • "A donut—" "That's for me...."
    • "A club sandwich—" "That is mine...."
  • The exaggerated pride as Ted says, "And...a hatchet!"
  • "But it's your business too, Ted, because we want you to take part." Beat. Ted sports an Oh, Crap! look, the previous several hours clearly filling his mind. Cue one of the penthouse residents blowing a party tooter to punctuate it.
  • Ted being so absorbed in Chester's temptation that he chops off the guy's finger without a second thought.
    • The temptation itself is hilarious in how completely deadpan Ted is as he listens to the pitch. Pull to a slow close-up as we can feel the Greed taking hold. And when the question is posed in the end, he doesn't hesitate for a split second:
      Chester: So, Ted...what's it's gonna be?
      Ted: Okay!
      Everyone else: YES!!! ALWAYS...BE...CLOSING!!!
      Ted: RIGHT HERE!!! RIGHT NOW!!! ...BEFORE I CHANGE MY MIND!!!
  • The fact that the lighter fails on the very first try!!!
  • Ted's swagger as he leaves.

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