"I thought you said it was going to be a piece of cake. I remember, because you were eating a piece of cake at the time, and you said, 'My class is going to be this.'"
The main character and narrator, a thirty-something architect professor of architecture (and later an architect again) at Columbia with an excessively romantic disposition, looking for love in New York.
Beard of Sorrow: Grew one after breaking up with Robin. He is implied to do this every time a major relationship ends.
Berserk Button: Ted is an extremely proud New Yorker and an extremely proud non-New Jerseyan. How proud, you ask? When Ted runs into Stella after she leaves him at the altar, the tipping point at which Ted decides to chew her out is not the fact that she left him in the first place—it's the fact that Stella refused to move to New York and expected Ted to move to New Jersey to be with her, but moves to Tony's place in New York once he and Stella get back together with no fuss.
The Determinator: While Ted generally shows signs of this, the entirety of the season 1 finale is Ted embodying this Trope, to the point that he somehow defies logic itself and makes it rain: "It is meant to be, and you know why? Because I MEAN it to be!"
Irony: Out of the gang, he's the one who really wants to get married. However, his two best bros get married before he does, meaning he's the last one out of the gang to get marrried.
Just in the name of love? He's perfectly happy going along with Marshall's and especially Barney's crazy ideas, and he even comes up with some insane schemes himself.
On the other hand, we never did find out what Ted said to him to get Tony to marry Stella. Maybe he said something to make a) Tony start crying and b) gave him the motivation to write a movie featuring Ted like that.
"The only people in the universe who haven't seen Star Wars are the characters in Star Wars. And that's cause they lived 'em, Ted! That's cause they lived the Star Wars!"
Ted's former college roommate and best friend, a sweet-tempered goofball who makes his way through law school and eventually takes the Bar during the course of the series. In the pilot, he becomes engaged to his girlfriend Lily. They get married later and are currently trying to have a child.
Guile Hero: There are hints that Marshall is far more sly and cunning that he acts. Note that he's often the first that seems to cotton on and predict Lily or Barney's gambits. Not to mention he played a pretty hardcore and BadassParanoia Gambit on Barney with the "Slap Bet" and has manipulated Barney before with more efficiency than most
Informed Flaw: In "Jenkins", the gang consider Marshall a "reacher" to Lily's "settler" in which he would never get anybody better then Lily. Since when this is mention, Marshall is working as a lawyer to a big company and is a fun Nice Guy and with Lily at worst being a tad bit manipulative and has credit card issues, this is hard to believe.
Let's Get Dangerous: Turns out the fights he had with his brothers are all true.
Obfuscating Stupidity: He may seem like a big goof most of the time (well, he is), but the minute he steps into lawyer!mode? Don't mess with him.
Real Men Wear Pink: He loves girly/coupley things like those frilly pink "girl" drinks (which he never orders because of the double standard) and brunch.
Shipper on Deck: Marshall thinks Barney and Robin are perfect for each other. And has commented that he likes the idea of Barney and Ted.
An artist and kindergarten teacher with a slightly rebellious streak, who is nevertheless deeply committed to Marshall. Together they represent the voice of stable, adult relationships in the series, as the resident Beta Couple.
Ambiguously Bi: Happily Married to Marshall (who is very much male), but it is heavily implied she's attracted to female friend Robin.
Not So Covert Pervert: She tries to get Barney's porn collection off Ted, she is curious to watch a sex tape Barney had made, and she stares at Robin's breasts, in the space of two episodes. Others have her wanting Marshall to not cross his legs because he's not wearing any pants and mentions erotic dreams with Robin, Mila Kunis, Bill Cosby, Ranjit, George Washington and various other people. Of course her actress is pretty well known for playing these roles.
Cradle of Loneliness: Does this with a pillow dressed in Marshall's clothes while he's away.
The Lad-ette: Not as much as Robin, but she's a perpetual winner of drinking contests and hotdog eating competitions and she won't let you forget that - it's in her resume!
Misplaced Kindergarten Teacher: Lily does teach kindergarten, but in the brief time she tried other jobs, she tended to try and deal with workplace conflicts in the same manner and with the same reasoning as she had with children.
The unrepentant bachelor who offers a counterpoint to Lily and Marshall's monogamous bliss. Barney is a business executive who works a high paying desk job, does exactly what he wants all of the time, makes it a point not to sleep with the same girl twice, and makes no apologies for what he is.
Race Fetish: His Establishing Character Moment is announcing to Ted that he's moved on from half-Asian girls, and is now going after Lebanese girls. He also has said that his "type" is "Asian, with some boob."
Ship Tease: Barney has expressed considerable attraction to Lily, and there's the inevitable chemistry matchmakers always seem to strike with their clients, but Barney and Lily will never go beyond a fantasy.
Shipper on Deck: According to him, "The world needs Marshall and Lily together!"
Former Canadian teen pop star turned reporter for a crappy news station and later to a researcher for a more respected one, she's got a fun mix of geeky/guyness to her. Ted falls in love with her at first sight, but it's not meant to be. She ends up a member of the gang (and Lily's best friend) anyway. She slept with Barney once, which seems to have given him a case of feelings for her, and she seems to reciprocate. They get together (then break up).
Abusive Parents: Robin's Father is extremely dismissive towards Robin as she was not the son he wanted.
"Robin Scherbatsky is many things: friend; confidant; occasional guest star in some confusing dreams that remind me a woman's sexuality is a moving target, but she is no crazy, jealous stalker-bitch."
The Lad-ette: Likes hockey, guns, cigars, scotch...
Law of Inverse Fertility: Gets hit with this hard when she realizes that she will never be able to be a mother, even if it wasn't in her immediate plan.
Les Yay: After hearing that Lily had wished to have a lesbian experience, Robin leans down and kisses her on the lips.
Meganekko: Starting in season six, Robin, played by the already ridiculously hot Cobie Smulders, actually managed to get even hotter by donning a pair of glasses.
Ms. Fanservice: There are a lot of eye-catching moments.
Robot Buddy: In both Let's Go To The Mall and Sandcastles In The Sand. It was her sidekick.
Running Gag: Sometimes whenever the gang tells her something about herself that is absolutely obvious, she laughs hysterically while denying it, followed by a quick "Shut Up!".
Shipper on Deck: After she breaks up with Barney, Robin ships Barney and Nora.
Matchmaker Crush: Until she realized that she still has feelings for him.
Sugar and Ice Personality: She keeps her feelings hidden most of the time because of her childhood, but has proven numerous times that she has a warm and caring side.
"Kids, I'm gonna tell you an incredible story. The story of how I met your mother."
The woman about whom Future Ted is telling a story to his kids about. Little is known about her, other than that she owned a yellow umbrella and that she was in the class Ted's seen teaching at the end of season four.
Hot For Teacher: Although Ted had the wrong classroom, so she's not actually his student.
Not Allowed to Grow Up: Currently the "reaction" of the kids are only stills from a previous clip.
Word Of God has stated that they already shot the ending of the series at the start of season 2, so that when the show does end, Ted's kids don't rapidly age several years when their dad finishes his story.
The gang's favorite cab/limo/anything driver. Meets the main five for the first time in the pilot episode, and after driving them around a few times eventually becomes friends with them to the point of knowing many personal details about their lives.
The most prominent waitress at MacLaren's Bar. Like Carl, she seems to be relatively close to the main five and even had a short fling with Barney.
The Chew Toy: She seems to get hurt a lot at MacLaren's, often because of the gang.
Clingy Jealous Girl: Subverted - Barney sees her as this during their short fling, because he's Barney. She simply thinks they're actually boyfriend and girlfriend, and acts accordingly.
Everyone Calls Her Barkeep: Subverted. Everyone knows her by her first name, but she's always called "Wendy the Waitress".
Happily Married: In Ted's 2021 flashback, she's married to an ex-coworker of Marshall's, and they run into Ted while on their second honeymoon in Hong Kong.
Victoria is the first serious girlfriend Ted gets in the series. She shows up in mid-season one and stays around for most of the remaining episodes of the season until she gets a baking scholarship in Germany.
Romantic False Lead: Subverted. The writers initially wrote her as this, but she that didn't stop her from becoming a beloved character among the fandom.
Sickeningly Sweethearts: To the point that Marshall and Lily are jealous of how lovey-dovey she and Ted are.
Scooter is Lily's ex-boyfriend. Their parents are friends and the two of them dated throughout their teenage years, but Lily broke things off when she went to college. To this day, he's still trying—and failing—to win her back.
Stella is a dermatologist who Ted visits for the purpose of removing his lower-back tattoo and becomes his main love interest throughout seasons three and four and almost marries him. She has a daughter named Lucy and has an unresolved relationship with Tony, her ex-boyfriend and father of her daughter.
Easily Forgiven: Averted hard. When she comes back for an episode, no one forgives her for leaving Ted on their wedding day.
Fauxshadow: In season 3's St. Patrick's Day episode, narrator!Ted states that the mother was at the same party he and Barney went to, but that they didn't meet her then. Stella mentions offhand that she was at a party on St. Paddy's.
Stella's ex-boyfriend and Lucy's father. Is jealous of Ted and Stella's relationship, as he never got over her, but is shown to feel guilty for getting back together with her on the same day she and Ted were supposed to get married.
Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He feels so bad about Stella & Ted breaking up that he arranges for Ted to get his teaching job at Columbia.
Don is introduced as Robin's new love interest after she and Barney break up and "the guy she's supposed to marry". He left after accepting the same job opportunity that Robin turned down in order to be with him.
Character Shilling: One episode after he's shown to be a jackass and loser, he hangs out with the gang offscreen and the gang simply starts talking about how perfect he is. It's rather jarring.
Irony: The only reason that Don got a shot at his dream job is that Robin gave up that same opportunity.
Jerkass: Being apathetic about his job regardless of who else that interferes with? Pulling the Naked Man on Robin after trying to make amends for his behaviour? Leaving Robin for a job that Robin turned down so she could stay with him? Yeah, this guy fits here.
Aww, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other: At Marshall's bachelor party, Stuart uses all the tired cliches of marriage being a ball and chain, the end of freedom, etc. and pretty much confirms it's because his own marriage isn't going so well. As the party goes from bad to worse, he states that he misses Claudia.
Robin's court-ordered therapist after she had assaulted another woman. He stopped being Robin's therapist because he was attracted to her and they ended up dating.
Only Sane Man: Literally. As a professional therapist, he can point out all the specific psychological ways the Five-Man Band is so completely messed up.
Patrice
Robin's co-worker. She doesn't like her.
Ascended Extra: Introduced as a background character in reaction shots. Gradually comes into more focus.
