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  • The end of each chapter in the first game, the only times that the protagonist speaks, generally saying kick ass things in a cool-sounding voice.
    Julius: That was a hell of an explosion. You okay, playa?
    Protagonist: I got ran over by a mothafuckin' truck, what d'you think?
    • A Shut Up, Hannibal! moment to Big Bad Alderman Richard Hughes. "Hey, can we speed this shit up? I want to go to Freckle Bitch's."
  • When Action Girl Lin is murdered by Smug Snake William Sharp, you get a chance to get some well deserved karmic justice by chasing the bastard down.
    • You do this after breaking out of a locked car trunk after being tied up and tossed in a lake. Unfortunately, you can't save Lin.
  • Tanya Winters gets one in the way she pretty much systematically plays the Vice Kings against one another, all the way being dismissed as a piece of fluff.
    Warren Williams: Hey yo, Tanya- What's goin' on?
    Warren Williams: Bitch, you better not miss, cause if—
    Tanya Winters: *shoots Williams dead* Thanks for the advice.
    • Warren was a cocky, incompetent wannabe-gangster, but you have to give him credit for his Defiant to the End reply to Tanya's betrayal.
  • The Playa's final battle with Price forces him to battle against a Car Transport while he's being chased down by seemingly an endless number of Rollerz.
  • Benjamin King. What does he do when his entire gang betrays him and his former lieutenant tries to have him killed on the spot? He jumps up on the boardroom table, grabs a gangster's bat mid-swing, runs across the table while beating another gang member down, throws the bat to take out another, slide kicks another gangster at the end of the table and gets out the door with only a bullet in the arm. All in about ten seconds. And after that, he holds his own for a good three minutes in the middle of a courtyard filled with what might be the highest concentration of enemies the game has shown yet, all while the player races across the city to get to him.
    • Another awesome moment for King, right before his gang betrays him. After Warren insults him to his face, he grabs Warren and slams his head into a table while giving a Badass Boast to end all Badass Boasts.
    Benjamin King: You forget who you're talking to! My name is Benjamin mothafuckin' King! I'm the man who took my crew from being a bunch of baby gangstas in Sunnyvale to one of the most influential and feared forces in the goddamn city! You know how I did that? (Warren doesn't answer, so King slams his head into the table again) I said, You. Know. How. I. Did. That?
    Warren Williams: How, Mr. King?
    Benjamin King: I did it by knowing when it was time to watch, when it was time to build, and when it was time to act. (shoves Warren away) I'm through carryin' your punk ass. If I was you, I'd drop those flags and get the fuck out of here before I erase your ass.
    • Think King can't outdo himself in awesomeness? How about when he, Johnny, and Playa all shoot their way to the top of the Vice King's HQ, confront Tanya in her office, and blow her out of a window with combined machine-gun fire. And then, when she's still clinging on for dear life, King walks over to her and steps on her fingers to loosen her grip, sending her plummeting to her death onto the hood of his car.
    Tanya: Please! Please... Don't!
    King: Tanya, please do yourself a favour and die with some dignity.
  • Beating Escort: after being harassed by those supremely annoying news vans for 24 levels, your reward is... a rather pimped out Jeep Limo.
    • A more satisfying reward comes from finishing the activity location in the Suburbs - you get a news van. With a huge middle finger painted on the side.
  • Say what you like about Troy Bradshaw, using Victor Rodriguez's flaming corpse to light a cigarette was badass. And slightly horrifying. But mostly badass.

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