We open with four people walking through a castle, led by Jackie Chan. Along with him are an older gentleman dressed like a stereotypical archaeologist. A young man and woman are with them, and I'm going to just assume that they're his assistants. I'll call them Baseball Cap and Silent Woman.
The older gentleman says that the castle belonged to Mad King Ludwig, and that it's full of booby traps. Jackie stops them, finding a hidden wire. Baseball Cap is skeptical that the traps still work. Jackie takes his hat, drops it on the wire and the walls slam together. He gives Baseball Cap his crushed hat back.
The group arrive in an entryway, and Jackie puts his finger in a skull to open a hidden passageway. Naturally, it is filled with lots and lots of treasure. Jackie is warning them not to touch anything when Baseball Cap grabs a sword. This sets off a booby trap. Nice going, genius.
The entrance starts to close, but Jackie kicks a spear, which lodges in the doorway. The spear holds just long enough for his three companions escape, but snaps in half as he arrives. He runs into the entrance.
Jackie flips and dodges to avoid the many darts. Jackie grabs a shield to deflect some of the darts. He spots a hole in the wall, and wall jumps up to it. He rides the shield out of the castle, landing safely outside. Somehow I doubt historical treasures were meant to double as snowboards.
The camera pulls away, and we see that two men were watching the events through binoculars. One of the men is bald and the other has white hair. Both order their men to follow Jackie.
Cut to the intro, which is awesome.
The music lines up nicely with the action. There are shots of both the heroes and the villains. We get a nice sequence with both the real Jackie Chan and cartoon Jackie Chan. Even though there's no words or dialogue, we get a glimpse of the personalities of the characters through facial expressions and body language.
The intro is updated each season, reflecting the changing villains and MacGuffins.
After the intro, we open at an antique shop. Jackie is upstairs practicing some martial arts. A bell rings, and he goes downstairs. We are introduced to Jackie's uncle, who is only known as Uncle. The scene that follows is a great introduction to Uncle.
He tells Jackie to give him a hug. When Jackie gets close, Uncle hits him with a two-finger strike and scolds him for not making coffee.
Uncle has three "one more things":
- The university called and needs Jackie to translate some parchments.
- Uncle needs to go in back to translate the writings on the shield.
- Jackie's niece, Jade, from China is coming to live with him for a year because she was having trouble in school.
Jackie is startled that he has a niece, and Uncle explains that Jade is the daughter of Jackie's cousin, Shin. Jackie asks why no one bothered to tell him about this, and Uncle said he didn't want to bother him. Uncle goes into the back while Jackie awkwardly tries to introduce himself to Jade.
This is interrupted when three men — Finn, Ratso and Chow — enter the store. They tell Jackie that their wealthy employer wants to buy the shield from him. Jackie tells them that he already donated it to the university. The men try to be intimidating by knocking some vases off shelves. Jackie dives and catches them, neatly putting them back on a table. He lands in a chair with a smile.
Finn tells him to "un-donate" the shield by the next day, and makes a veiled threat towards Jackie's family. After they leave, Uncle comes out. He calls Jackie a terrible salesman. Jackie tells him to watch Jade and hide the shield.
Jackie follows the three men, hopping from rooftop to rooftop. When they get to a stop sign, Jackie starts to climb down the side of the building. The pipe he's holding onto promptly breaks off from his weight. He lands on the hood of the car, leaving a huge dent.
Jackie smiles sheepishly at them.
They ram the car into a fence to try to dislodge Jackie before climbing out of the car. Jackie dodges them for a bit before hopping the fence. He taunts them. And they promptly draw electric swords and cut through the fence like it was made of butter. Looks like Jackie's celebration was a bit premature.
Jackie — not wanting to find out what it feels like to be Darth Maul — dodges the swords. He rolls across the hood of a truck, pulling off the windshield wipers in the process. He gets into a fighting stance. The three men are not impressed and charge him.
Jackie skillfully disarms them. They follow him onto a playground, and Jackie shoos the children away. After a bit more fighting where Jackie clearly has the upper hand, they decide to run.
Jackie spots Jade on the playground. She presumably saw the entire fight. Before he can go talk to her, the bald man from earlier uses some gas to knock Jackie out.
After a convenient commercial break, Jackie wakes up in a van. He lunges at the bald man . . . and hugs him.
Black says that he's there on official business. Jackie says he hasn't heard from Black in six years. He says that the three men must have knocked him out, but Black admits that he's the one who did it. Jackie is not happy about this, saying that he thought they were friends. He climbs out of the van into an alley.
Black apologizes, but says that their location needs to be secret.
Jackie gets out of the van and goes to dial a pay phone. When he tries to dial, the phone booth goes into a secret passage and shoots down an elevator shaft. Black meets him at the bottom.
Black says that this is Section 13, a top-secret law enforcement organization. Black has been working to form this organization for years. Black asks Jackie about the shield, and Jackie tells him that Black is the second person that's asked about it. Black explains that the three men were members of the Dark Hand, an international crime syndicate. The Dark Hand is headed by Valmont, the white-haired man we saw earlier.
We switch scenes to Valmont, who is annoyed that three of his enforcers got beat up by an archaeologist. In the background is a cool circular dragon statue/decoration. Rather than browbeat them, Valmont simply says "Tohru," and a man with a build like a sumo wrestler comes in. He is easily twice their size. Tohru gives them a bear hug which looks like it's about to break bones.
After a few seconds, Valmont tells Tohru enough and tells Tohru to go get the shield. The dragon statue's eyes glow and the statue starts talking. He calls Tohru impressive but suggests that he be aided by the Shadowkhan. As he speaks, shadows travel across the floor before forming into ninjas.
Cut back to Section 13, where Captain Black is explaining that the Dark Hand has been going after artifacts for unknown reasons, and they could really use an archaeologist like Jackie. Jackie protests that he's just an amateur. Black says that Jackie is "wise and talented" and Black knows he can trust him. Black assures Jackie that it will be part time and "research only," so it won't interfere with Jackie's work with the university.
Then Jade comes in on a motor bike, nearly running them over. Jackie jumps on an office chair and manages to grab the back end of the bike. Jade tells him to hold on because she's busting him out, and Jackie is astonished to learn she speaks English.
Jade continues to drive like a maniac, narrowly avoiding hitting several people before Jackie manages to hit the off switch, catapulting him forward. A couple agents grab Jade while Black runs over to see if Jackie's okay.
Jackie starts to scold Jade, saying she could have been hurt. Jade says that she grabbed the bike from Section 13's garage in order to rescue Jackie. Jackie tells her that they are his friends.
Black is not amused that his security got bypassed by a child. Jackie tries to give Jade a lecture, telling her that "courage without wisdom is foolishness." This goes right over Jade's head.
Jackie gets a call from Uncle about the shield. Uncle tells Jackie that he's translated the inscriptions, which are actually magic incantations. Uncle says the shield is not important. Before Uncle can continue, Tohru shows up and demands the shield. He grabs Uncle.
After a word from our sponsors, Tohru picks up the phone and tells Jackie that Uncle is fine "for now." We cut to Jackie agreeing to bring the shield and come alone. He hangs up and asks Black to watch Jade, saying that the phone call was about "a favor, between friends."
Black turns to look at Jade . . . who managed to vanish in the three seconds she was off-screen. That girl is fast.
Cut to Jackie searching Uncle's shop for the shield. He pulls back a curtain and finds Jade, startling him. He tells Jade to go to her room.
Jackie tells her to help find the shield. She finds it, but knocks a bunch of things on top of Jackie in the process. She obviously was hoping this meant she could come along, but Jackie just tells her to go to her room.
Cut to a very tall building. Jade somehow followed Jackie. Again. (She apparently has Offscreen Teleportation powers.) Jackie tells her to stay behind or he'll send her back to Hong Kong.
Jackie arrives on the roof to see Tohru with Uncle. Jackie tries to ask what Tohru wants with it, but Tohru just tells him to hand it over. Jackie spots Jade peeking up at what's going on from the stairway. Jackie tosses the shield to Tohru, but it goes over his head and returns to Jackie. Tohru tells Jackie to "say sayonara to your Uncle," but Uncle is already running away with Jade.
Jackie is about to run, when Shadowkhan start showing up. Soon, he is completely surrounded. He puts the shield on his arm.
The Shadowkhan attack Jackie, while Tohru calmly walks over to the elevator. We cut between the fight, Tohru standing calmly in the elevator, and Uncle and Jade running down flights of stairs. As Uncle and Jade exit the building, Jackie is forced to the edge of the rooftop. He smiles and drops the shield. It glides down to Jade and Uncle.
Tohru arrives and says "the shield." He sounds bored. (It's about the eighth time he's said this line, so it's understandable.) Uncle attempts to attack Tohru. Tohru doesn't even blink. They hand over the shield. Tohru leaves and the Shadowkhan vanish.
Captain Black shows up in a helicopter and tells Jackie again that it's just a research position. When they're safely back on the ground, Captain Black apologizes for Jackie's family getting involved.
Uncle tells them that the shield wasn't important, but the talisman at the center of the shield is magic. Captain Black obviously thinks Uncle is a crazy coot, but is polite enough to just say that they'll worry about that after they recover the talisman.
Jade pulls the Rooster Talisman out of her pocket. She'd swiped it because she thought it looked important. So once again, the day is saved . . . by theft!
^_^ I love kids shows.
Cut to Tohru bowing on one knee to Valmont and presenting the shield. Valmont and Shendu both yell at him asking where the talisman is.
I don't see why they're so angry. It's their own darn fault. If they had bothered to tell Tohru the talisman was the important part, this wouldn't have happened.
Cut back to Uncle giving exposition about the talisman, saying that it's the sign of the rooster from the Chinese Zodiac, and that there will be 11 other talismans like it. Black asks if Jackie will help Section 13 find the talismans before the Dark Hand does, to which Jade immediately chimes in with "absolutely!"
The next episode takes place immediately after this one, so I'll save some of my commentary for next time.
At the end of each episode, there's a short segment where the real Jackie Chan answers a question from a viewer. Most are trivia about Jackie, but a few relate to the show. I'll only be including the ones that relate to the actual show.
Jackie explains that he always loved cartoons when he was a kid and wanted to be a cartoon character. In cartoons, he could do things that he wouldn't be able to do in real life. Cartoons would also be a way for children to remember him in the future.
We cut to the credits with a song that I swear never played when the cartoon first aired. (They always played some commercial for another show during the credits.)
The song is . . . okay. Not horrible, but not great either. The lyrics are a bit hard to make out, but it's upbeat and energetic, which fits in decently with the show.
Show Trivia
- Since Jade is the daughter of Jackie's cousin, she's actually his first cousin once removed.
- In Chinese, older men are addressed as "uncle." This may explain why Uncle's real name is not used. (And why Jade would call Jackie "Uncle Jackie.")
- Ratso, Finn and Chow's are not named in this episode. I'm using their names to avoid confusion.
- Shendu and Jackie are both voiced by James Sie.*
- The end theme is a remix of the Wheatus song "Punk Ass Bitch."
Here's a Youtube video with both versions.
- Note: This will be the last time I use profanity during this liveblog, because — hey — kids show.
Historical Trivia
- Mad King Ludwig (Ludwig II of Bavaria) was a real person. He was deposed due to "madness" although whether he was actually insane is disputed. He's known for his contribution to the arts and architecture, including two castles. Wikipedia is strangely silent on whether his castles included booby traps and a magic talisman.
- Ludwig was nicknamed the Swan King and the Fairy tale King*, so it's fitting that the rooster talisman was found in one of his castles.
- The castle is named as Castle Linderhof. However, from the outside, it more closely resembles Neuschwanstein Castle.
Comments
