Welcome back. I admit, I did not have any time liveblogging this because, quite frankly, it's so...boring. And, really, with shitloads of filler...no offense.
That, and it doesn't help that Akizuki re-edits the chapters. Would it make the story worse? Who knows?
But now, I'll try to get back into the game.
(then Carter, Mako, and Matoi show up)
Oh hai!
Carter: Rika, there's no time to reference The Room.
...trapped in a dimension again?
Mako: No. We have some unfinished business. (glares at the fanfic)
Oh, right. Well...
Previously, Flurious shows up and gets bashed a lot, making him look pathetic in a Woobie way instead of annoying like the author intended. Pope Hat is revived. And Kimberly is suited up for...future battles. All in the midsts of out-of-characterness, plot-induced stupidities, and writing that's very God-awful.
So let's move on with...
The Rangers are in the New Skybase, recovering. We're told that it was a hard day for them. Meanwhile, Kimberly plays a song on Souta's guitar, "Down the Road"...in English.
I'm sorry, but I cannot stop thinking of that Fridge Logic. We see here that Kimberly's perfectly capable of speaking English. In a different world, no less. In fact, why is she singing in English when she speaks Japanese otherwise? Is it because the author likes Amy Jo Johnson as a singer?
Explain, fanfic, explain!
But of course we get no explanation, because Tommy's amazed at Kimberly's singing, and Alpha 5 and Zordon later join her. Ugh.
Mako: And we get some potential "comic relief". Bulk and Skull are hired for some odd jobs, and they're amazed at the New Skybase. Trini is immediately disgusted.
Which begs the question: does she not know about what Bulk and Skull did? The "we are the Power Rangers" thing in "Countdown to Destruction"? I mean...I'm kinda sure that it would reach Switzerland, where the Peace Conference is located.
Jason orders Trini to calm down, and they explore with her camera. Okay...
Then Professor Makino, the Boukengers' mentor of sorts, appears and talks to Bulk and Skull. They're hired on as assistants, and there may be a chance that there may be aliens. And poor Professor Phenomenus is forgotten; they don't even mention him to the professor.
Also, Makino uses an iPod. Go figure. I have a question: what is up with Akizuki's obsession with characters using iPods? Yes, I admit that I've dabbled into that before (using the device to change your appearance, anyone?), but I don't act like it's the only technology they use. Ever. And said devices are even used for more practical things (Character!Rika using hers to play "Party Rock Anthem" so Alyx's demons (the Black Soldiers) get distracted, anyone?).
Sorry, but such things bug the shit out of me so much.
Then they talk a bit more, Makino's the one who created the Boukenger's technology, blah blah blah. NEXT!
Tommy meets Asuka, one of his counterparts. They talk, and we get this from Asuka.
(headdesks)
You know, I do have a question about the timelines and shit. Why is it that the Rangers' timelines...don't really go farther? I mean, we know that in Power Rangers Samurai, the year's probably 2012.
There's believing that some worlds are faster in time and days than others, and there's...this.
...my brain hurts.
Matoi: Tommy thinks that the United Alliance of Evil may have something to do with the connected dreams, and he compliments the staff. And then he's told that Kimberly wants to see him...despite the both of them were in the same room previously. Ridiculous? Yes.
From there, Kimberly is listening to one of the songs from Jetman. The narration simply states that it is amazing of how she could understand Japanese simply by warping to an area.
Aha! So the Super Sentai World is a Fisher Kingdom! But...that still doesn't explain why Kimberly can sing in English. I'm sorry, I want to let it go, but the problem is, the more the Ranger characters speak in Japanese for no reason, Sean Akizuki won't let me.
Matoi: Tommy and Kimberly try to strike up their romance again. To summarize the conversation, the real reason why Kimberly broke up with Tommy is that she didn't want to be in his way—he's a Ranger, and she's not.
Which is the dumbest thing ever!
I'm sorry, but...there have been countless Ranger-and-non-Ranger romances. Billy and Cestria. (And all his other girlfriends prior to that.) Trini and Richie. Shayla and Merrick, the fact that they're not together at the end be damned. Fuck, has he even forgotten one of the most well-known Ranger/non-Ranger romances ever, Joel Rawlings and Ms. Angela Fairweather?
Regardless...turns out that Tommy broke up with Katherine. Why? Who knows? And so, we find out that Kim has had some suitors, and she prefers a man who loves her for who she is. When she achieves that, she wants to settle down and become a mother.
...God, gag me with a spoon. I mean, writing a romance arc takes considerable feat. But considering how...one-note virtually everyone are...and since we do not get an explanation of how or why Tommy broke up with Katherine, outside of the "Better as Friends" "justification"...
So they take a walk while Skull, somehow, watches them. He, too, loves Kimberly and considers himself the "invisible man". Never mind the supposed Word of God that Skull married Kimberly.
Oh, right, this is Akizuki's way of making things "better". I forgot, how silly of me!
...how long is this going to last? (30+ more chapters) Oh, come on!
Carter: Meanwhile, Trini takes pictures of the solar system in the observatory, Jason with her. She talks about her dead older brother, who died after falling ill in Africa. He, too, was a photographer, and she wanted to follow in his footsteps.
All of this would have been moving if Akizuki did not use more Department of Redundancy Department paragraphs. Seriously, here's what it looks like.
- Trini: "He died in the wild lands of Africa taking pictures of a land he loved so much. I really wanted to follow in his footsteps. It happened one fateful day that he contracted an epidemic in Africa, he never recovered and he died there."
So Jason tells her to be herself, and this ends the conversation. Yeah, it's nice and all to get some background for this Trini, but dear God...
Mako: Meanwhile, the Shinkengers are reunited, and they talk about their lives. Also, it has to be noted that story!me is always mentioned to be a terrible cook. Which is sad...
Not to mention fucking annoying. If I were to make a drinking game with this fic, if one of the conditions include "take a shot every time Mako is mentioned to be a terrible cook", you'll develop alcohol poisoning in no time.
In fact? I'm going to make the basics right now. To make reading the story tolerable, take a shot when you see...
- Mako always mentioned to be a terrible cook instead of, oh, I don't know, developing her fucking cooking skills.
- Someone displays more than one dimension. No, OOC-ness does not count.
- The author's preference of Jetman shining through.
- The author's hatred of the Disney-era Power Rangers series shining through.
- Take two shots if you see a character, and you find yourself hating said character as much as Akizuki did—as in, he wrote said character to where you can hate him/her as much as he did.
- The Ranger characters speaking Japanese for no reason. To make it count, it has to be blatantly stated in the story.
Yeah, you'll get plastered in no time with these rules, but there's one more rule should you do this: read the story slowly. And always assign a designated driver.
Anyway...where was I? Oh, yes.
Mako: Then Trini arrives, and she and the Shinkengers talk more. She manages to take the pictures of the group. And...that's about it.
Really, it's decent to have the characters interact, but...honestly, it feels like filler. Filler that leads to nowhere. And when they recap about stuff, half of the time, it's stuff that we've already read.
Like this for example, during dinner, Trini and Jason recap to one another about their visions. And I cannot help but wonder, oh, what's wrong with this recap.
- Trini: "I have to admit I was pretty freaked out when I was visited by a ghost before this incident- I was in Africa when I saw that woman's ghost claiming to be the first yellow ranger in all Sentai history."
First Yellow Ranger in all Sentai history? Don't you mean first Yellow Senshi—first Yellow Warrior? No, no, scratch that. First female Yellow Warrior in all Sentai history!
Of course, Jason got visions from Geki...and AkaRed. Does it mean that he'll be the latter's successor? Perhaps due to nostalgia or some shit?
Pfft. If fucking only.
Also, Tommy and Kimberly are having dinner in the cafeteria. They speak lovey-dovey talk, all really irrelevant. NEXT!
Meanwhile, the Boukengers are reunited with Eiji, who has a haircut and apparentally left for Scotland. Okay, I'm pretty sure that Eiji may have picked up the English language while he was there, so...why can't they ask him to be a translator for the Rangers?
Sorry, sorry.
Ryu arrives, announcing to the group that the quarters are ready and assigned, and they must get a good night's sleep. So they do.
Meanwhile, at the United Alliance of Evil, Radiguet thinks about the people dropping from the sky, and he immediately takes note of the women. He wants to not only protect his power and prestige, he wants to lust over the women as well.
Okay, okay. We all know that Radiguet is one sadistic mofo. But I will like to point to the direction of the women-lusting. Because aside from said tortures, he'll always lust over women. And that is just one of many, many deviations from canon!Radiguet.
Actually, shit, almost forgot to call this particular Radiguet RINO.
Anyway, Flurious, Pope Hat, Yaiba, and Ryuuwon return. Flurious is ready to take his role...which is to clean up the entire base, starting with the comfort rooms. And he finds it humiliating.
...is it bad that I agree with Flurious?
As for Pope Hat, he's forcibly bowing down to RINO. And I find myself caring less and less about the story again.
As mentioned before, it's all about...the filler, the bland writing, and the one-track minds most characters have. Long, among a few others, wants to overthrow RINO. RINO wants to...torture and lust over women, and he throws tantrums when he doesn't get his way. (Spoiler alert.) The women show to be strong, and yet, they can be so emotional (gags) over love. The men...oy.
I'm sorry, but for the first time in liveblogging history...I'm skipping shit no one cares about.
So RINO decides to think of tortures after arguing with his subordinates. God, even the fucking Jigsaw Killer has more of a characterization than RINO! At least he has reasons for his traps—twisted ones, yes, but...
The next morning, the Rangers and Warriors train. And they now have a new name: the United Super Sentai and Power Rangers Alliance, or USSPRA for short. I'll give Akizuki credit...the name's...okay. It could be worse.
After Tommy muses over the possibilities of meeting his old allies, they start their training session. And talking over meaningless crap on top of it.
Meanwhile, Ryu and Gai talk about RINO and how he has extended his reach...he has already captured several European countries, which are the following: Germany, England, Ireland, Belgium, and Luxembourg. Okay, I thought Eiji mentioned that Scotland was captured as well?
Then two people show up: the aforementioned Billy and Zack. And, you guessed it, they're speaking Japanese for no real reason. Just because they're in an area where the citizens speak Japanese, that doesn't mean that foreigners somehow pick up on the language.
I'm sorry, but I'm frankly pissed at the lack of explanation here.
Then the Grinams show up, ready to beat Zack and Billy down. We don't know what'll happen, because we're back at the New Skybase. Ryu and Aya notice a portal, and Eiji is going to investigate.
Also, we get this, considering that they've noticed Zach and Billy.
- Aya: "We might even have to change the name of our alliance to defeat this incarnation of the United Alliance of Evil."
...didn't you guys name yourselves the United Super Sentai and Power Rangers Alliance?! It should compass the two freaking groups!
Excuse me, but I have a wall that's desperate to be painted red. (slams head onto wall several times)
(several minutes later...)
Okay, now I'm better.
Later, the Questers corner Billy and Zack. Just when all hope is seemingly lost, Eiji shows up and saves the duo, transforming into Bouken Silver on top of it. He's later joined by Tommy and Kimberly, with the both of them transformed as well. And so, they manage to beat the Questers, but the villains retreat.
After introductions, Billy and Zack, along with Tommy, Kimberly, and Eiji, return to the New Skybase. The original team is happy with the reunion...and the two newcomers are amazed that Zordon's alive. Even though, you know, he shouldn't be.
And there's one thing that normally should be skipped due to time reasons, but...this has to be mentioned. Billy wants to become a laboratory scientist, and so he's paired up with Ranru Itsuki, one-fifth (counting Mikoto/AbareKiller) of the Abarangers. And he falls in love with her instantly.
...oy. My head hurts. But this is the first of many, many, freaking many crack pairings. How would Billy fall in love with her instantly at first sight? In fact, there's not even any build-up, just bam! Instant love. Also, why Ranru? As mentioned, Billy fell in love with Cestria. Just what the fuck happened to that romance?
Anyway...after the typical "Billy is not my boyfriend!" bullshit from Ranru to her other two Abarangers (Yukito and Ryouga, for the record), we cut back to the U.A.O.E. And RINO is throwing a hissy fit over the Quester's failure. How? By throwing a wine glass at them and blasting the everloving shit out of cardboard cutouts of the Boukengers and Dekarangers.
...yeah, um...I have not watched Jetman or anything, but I'm pretty damn sure that Radiguet does not throw a bitchfit over a loss. I mean, he has to not give a shit about it, right? Just...pick himself up and be ready for the next sadistic plan...right?
Anyway, RINO decides to...I am not making this up...travel to the past, where the Warriors are at their weakest. The question is, how in the hell would they achieve that?
You know what? Screw it, we're almost done with this chapter!
Meanwhile, at the USSPRA, the group learns of the U.A.O.E's plan, and even Aya's revealed to have had a vision from AkaRed as well. So what do they have in mind? To use time trains. No, sadly, not on loan from Den-O. And so, they plan to head to 1975, to assist the first Sentai group (Gorenger/Goranger, for the record), and go on from there.
...ugh. My brain hurts from all the frustrations and apathy.
Carter: How will the United Alliance of Evil defeat the Sentai Warriors, exactly?
Mako: Will the Rangers and Warriors manage to preserve the timelines?
And will I ever recover from this epic, apathetic mind fuck?
Emergency Signal; Now, Forward! To the next livebloggening of Super Sentai Vs. Power Rangers!
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