Part Nine: ...And Throw The Spear
Okay, so last time we left Pooh and his Friends, Velma jumps to conclusions like she always does. There are five parts left of this video, and so begins the “Countdown To Destruction”. What is the Countdown To Destruction? Well other than a cheap Shout-Out
to Power Rangers
, Countdown To Destruction refers to the countdown to my rage destroying this very video, hence the name. See, as you noticed, I spent a good chunk of the Liveblog kissing it’s ass, saying how it’s better than the other one. Well, I am still not fooled. Especially after the fact that I viewed the last five parts before I saw the first eight. Trust me, it won’t be a pretty sight. Let’s just say that Accentuate the Negative
will be turned Up to Eleven
Part 9 of Thirteen
Wait, 9 of 13? 913? KAIXA TIME!
: No Kaixa time for you, as it's blocked.
So Velma continues to be suspicious as she tells them that the motor oil is not used for hydraulics. Screw it; let us focus on Shaggy and Crystal. They investigate the area for clues, resulting in them finding that cave the quartet saw earlier. Buster wonders if there are aliens in there. What the hell do you think? Screw it, let's see how the paranoia is affecting Velma.
Okay, before we go on, let me be serious with this clown car thing
: It is impossible! First, everyone is squeezed into each other. It would feel crowded, and if anyone has claustrophobia (like say, Pumbaa)... well, they are screwed. Oh, and if the car goes over a speed bump, expect many broken bones, shattered spines and snapped necks. However, since this is a kid's show, we cannot show people horrible dying when Lester's car bumps. Lester seems to know this and asks how the group is doing and...
It's just Fred in there. Bullshit. I know, I have to use my imagination, but there is a difference between using your imagination
and being a moron
. Hence why I have to use my imagination to dangerous levels
. It kind of helps that Ttark aids in this by using a wobble effect to the various clips. That is cool, I guess. It kind of makes Lester more Crazy Awesome
because he can have a whole mass of characters in his small trailer, and still have room to fit tons of wooden objects
Let us go back to Shaggy and Crystal's group. They retreat to a cave due to the security guards and Shaggy and Scooby make a rattlesnake to scare them. Apparently, Buster does not wish to hear a redial... Huh, dyu? Okay... Then more Ship Tease
. A snake goes on Shaggy and he thinks it is Scooby's tail, “Aru, thinking it’s Scooby’s tail, dyu?” says Buster. Hilarity Ensues
. Buster goes Oh Crap!
. I am not sure if Buster was afraid of Snakes in the original show.
Back to Lester and the mutilated remains that is Pooh and his friends. No wait, still a kid's show. So Fred accuses Lester of being the culprit. REALLY? FIRST SALF-TACHI AND NOW LESTER? WHO'S NEXT? THE MECHANIC? Oh, wait, they already considered him as well. Daphne asks Velma why they are at the fenced area, and Pooh asks a different question. It feels awkward. So, with her paranoia still set on SALF-Tachi, Velma investigates beyond the fence as well. Oh, and you got to love Simba’s reaction to it. I think he is being sarcastic about it what with the rolling of his eyes.
Meanwhile, back at the cave, Shaggy finds the glow that they saw before the aliens came, "Or maybe the aliens, dyu." Uh, that is what Shaggy said. Fortunately, Shaggy (perhaps breaking his character in the process
) tells him to shut up. Meanwhile, back with PARANOID!Velma and her group, they follow some tracks to, guess what, a cave. No, wait, a mine. Oh, and Timon protests that he is not into the digging business, and Francine says that it is not for him to dig. Really?
Okay, sure, I will allow the fact that he is not good at digging, but how the hell does Francine know? It is established that they just met each other in this movie, and there was not enough time for Timon to explain his little story. And don’t tell me he had time in the car, because he would have trouble speaking with people crushing his lungs
. Oh, and while we are bringing Lion King ½ canon into this, remember how Pumbaa couldn’t handle crowds? Yeah, that is what I mean by screwed. I wonder how they handled the farting
during the ride. Okay, so Paranoid Velma investigates a jackhammer. Here is the following exchange...
: (In a scared tone, even though it’s not really that scary) What was that?
: I think it-
: But you’re not thinking of-
Yes, they happen to find gold in a mine. Of course. And so they will do what any person who finds gold would do: Take it. And that’s where part nine ends. But the ride isn’t over yet...
Not by a long shot...