History WarpThatAesop / TableTopGames

* ''TabletopGame/{{FATAL}}'': women are dumber than men and as such exist solely to provide victims for the nonstop rape (which, incidentally, will have no negative consequences for the perpetrator and only a few minor problems for the victim), and the entire basis of every civilisation ever has been the trade in sex slaves, even in societies where slavery, by and large, didn't actually exist.

* ''TabletopGame/{{Paranoia}}'': [[strike: He who shafts first, shafts best]] You have not been cleared for this information, citizen. Please report for termination. [[DissonantSerenity Have a pleasant daycycle. The Computer is your friend.]]

* ''Sorry'': It's okay to be a total bastard if the rules make you do it.
** And when you're being a total bastard, [[EasilyForgiven you're guaranteed to be forgiven if you apologize]], [[BlatantLies no matter how utterly insincere that apology is]]

* TabletopGame/{{Battleship}}: The world's navies are essentially flailing around, shooting blind.

* ''{{Exalted}}'': anything you want to do is entirely justified by the fact that it's you who wants to do it.

* ''MagicTheGathering'': Not only ScienceIsBad and rational attitude will turn you into a MadScientist and then into an EldritchAbomination, but also no matter how much you try, [[HardWorkHardlyWorks planeswalkers will always be better than you]].

* ''SeventhSea'': Most pirates were noble, free-thinking heroes, some women need to be locked up for the greater safety, and the Spanish Inquisition was protecting us from evil, extra-dimensional monsters.

* {{Traveller}} : It is the destiny of the human race to conquer large portions of the galaxy. Three times. In achieving this humanity will gain tremendous wealth, exploit thousands of planets and submit itself to an intersteller oligarchy. Such goals are laudable and enhance the glory of TheEmperor.
* {{Stratego}}: You're only allowed to kill people if you outrank them.

* ''{{Diplomacy}}'': It is necessary to betray your friends to succeed in life.

* ''{{Exalted}}: anything you want to do is entirely justified by the fact that it's you who wants to do it.

* TabletopGame/{{Chess}} : Kings are more important then anybody, despite being to all extents and purposes a rubbish piece. Queens can pretty much do whatever they like move-wise. But being female, the game can't possibly revolve around them. And as for common people, they are CannonFodder.

* {{Diplomacy}}: It is necessary to betray your friends to succeed in life.

* TabletopGame/DungeonsAndDragons: genocide is the easiest path to personal enlightenment, but it's OK because most of those you're killing are born evil and as such you're entirely justified in slaughtering them.
** The Drow: [[UnfortunateImplications Black people are evil. Black skin is a curse]].

* DungeonsAndDragons: genocide is the easiest path to personal enlightenment, but it's OK because most of those you're killing are born evil and as such you're entirely justified in slaughtering them.

* ''{{FATAL}}'': women are dumber than men and as such exist solely to provide victims for the nonstop rape (which, incidentally, will have no negative consequences for the perpetrator and only a few minor problems for the victim), and the entire basis of every civilisation ever has been the trade in sex slaves, even in societies where slavery, by and large, didn't actually exist.
** '''BZZZ''' I'm sorry, contestant, this is Warp That Aesop. There is absolutely no indication that {{FATAL}} does not embrace this Aesop with all its heart.

** Lunars: Lots of love will save the world if you do it with the right per- ...[[ButYouScrewOneGoat animal]]! *vomits*

* ''{{Monopoly}}'': Essentially taking over entire cities and driving other people to bankruptcy is OK if you get cash out of it!

** If you work hard enough, fought for your life, and make many sacrifices to ensure the survival of your planet, you will be considered a heretic/traitor/a danger...etc by the inquisition or the higher ups. Your reward, you get executed for all your achievements for the Imperium. Congratulations.

* CallOfCthulhu: Don't talk to ''anyone'', don't read ''anything'' don't even think about exploring further down that street, or you will start screaming and never stop!

* TabletopGame/{{Chess}} : Kings are more important then anybody. Common people are CannonFodder

** [[TruthInTelevision The political situation of pre-WW1 Europe was majorly fucked up.]]

* ''TabletopGame/{{Warhammer 40000}}'': If you work hard enough, even if you must make sacrifices, you can prevail
** That's ''way'' too good an aesop to come from a world where people regularly blow up their own planets up just to be sure.
*** Exactly. For [[TabletopGame/{{Warhammer 40000}} W40K]], that's a warped Aesop.
** If someone is different than you, you should PURGE THEM WITH THE HOLY PROMETHIUM IN THE NAME OF THE GOD EMPEROR!

* ''{{Warhammer 40000}}'': If you work hard enough, even if you must make sacrifices, you can prevail

*** Exactly. For [[{{Warhammer 40000}} W40K]], that's a warped Aesop.

** Making a {{Deal With The Devil}} is not only the fastest path to [[AGodAmI ultimate power]], but is also entirely without consequences since that devil is so determined to corrupt you that he'll neglect to stop your rapid ascent past him in power.

** '''BZZZ''' I'm sorry, contestant, this is Warp That Aesop. There is absolutely no indication that {{FATAL}} does not embrace this Aesop with all its heart.

* ''{{Paranoia}}'': [[strike: He who shafts first, shafts best]] You have not been cleared for this information, citizen. Please report for termination. [[DissonantSerenity Have a pleasant daycycle. The Computer is your friend.]]

** This is a carryover WarpThatAesop from the original game, which was an argument against capitalism.

** [[RapeAsComedy Rape is funny]]... no, that's intended. Stay away from magic, because you might attract [[MemeticMutation RANDY GAY OGRES]]! Nobody who takes up the professions that keep society running leads a life worth living and would be better off dead. Existence is pointless and the universe is utterly amoral, so the best thing to do is to loot and plunder. Everything is determined by random luck, any effort at improving your life could well make it worse, and [[YouCantFightFate trying to go against destiny is punishable by RL PK by desert eagle.]]

** ''TabletopGame/PrometheanTheCreated'': Sometimes, you mistrust people not because you're paranoid, but because you know on a subconscious level that they're not supposed to exist. So if you ever feel an instinctive revulsion for someone, it's not a weakness of character - it's because they're a monster, and that's how monsters work, so you're not responsible for your actions. ([[TheChewToy Although you should still feel ashamed of yourself anyway.]])

** ''TabletopGame/HunterTheVigil'': Taking up arms against evil will lead to two things - your early death and large piles of bullet-filled good people who were simply too arrogant to tell you about the bad ones.

* ''TheWorldOfDarkness'': BeingGoodSucks ''and'' won't EarnYourHappyEnding; however Evil ''[[BeingEvilSucks doesn't]]'' [[EvilFeelsGood Feel Good]] and results in PyrrhicVillainy when a player tries it, so you can't ''really'' make anything worse. So instead of fighting The Power/The Man/Elders/Exarchs/Uratha while agonizing over the tough moral choices, why not have {{wangst}} free fun while Rome (always, ''[[StatusQuoIsGod always]])'' burns?
** ''PrometheanTheCreated'': sometimes, you mistrust people not because you're paranoid, but because you know on a subconscious level that they're not supposed to exist. So if you ever feel an instinctive revulsion for someone, it's not a weakness of character - it's because they're a Promethean, and that's how Prometheans work, so you're not responsible for your actions. ([[TheChewToy Although you should still feel ashamed of yourself anyway.]])
** ''HunterTheReckoning'': Sometimes the people who get voices in their head telling them to kill are actually doing what's necessary for our survival.

** ''TabletopGame/HunterTheVigil'': taking up arms against evil will lead to two things - your early death and large piles of bullet-filled good supernaturals who were simply too arrogant to tell you about the bad ones.
*** Large corporation equals EldritchAbomination. (Either they're running it, or the company itself has become sentient - no, seriously, they actually use this as an example.)
** ''[[TabletopGame/MageTheAscension Mage: the Ascension]]'': [[ItsAllAboutMe anyone who disagrees with your personal philosophy, however reasonable they might seem, belongs to the vast herd of sheeple who are pulling the world down into its spiritual death]]. [[HypocriticalHumour This especially applies to other people who are capable of doing the exact same thing you can do]]. [[ScienceIsBad The worst offenders are those who insist reality is orderly and understandable with enough study]].
*** Looks like the inteded Aesop.

* {{Battleship}}: The world's navies are essentially flailing around, shooting blind.