History Series / ATouchOfCloth

* AsHimself: Quite a few examples.
** Series 1 has Todd Carty and radio DJ Henry Kelly.
** Series 2 has presenters Konnie Huq, Rufus Hound and Creator/RichardOsman appearing on the Help a Blameless Child {{telethon}}. Plus, various ''Series/EastEnders'' cast members show up [[spoiler:to pay their respects after Todd is killed.]]
** Series 3 has football pundit Chris “Kammy” Kamara giving half-time commentary on Cloth and Oldman’s interrogation of a suspect.

** Series 1 has Todd Carty and radio DJ Harry Kelly.

* CleanPrettyReliable:

* {{Catchphrase}}: DI Oldman talks about “the boys down at the station” a ''lot''.

* OffscreenTeleportation: Spoofed when Jack Cloth is working undercover and the boss of the criminal operation calls him up to get over there and explain himself. Cloth says that he'll "be there right away", then immediately walks through the door when the shot switches locations again.

* DyingClue: Todd Carty writes Macratty's name [[CouldntFindAPen in his own blood]] before dying, but ran out of room and had to scrunch the last few letters up. He also did some doodling ''and'' [[UpToEleven wrote "FIND JACK CLOTH" on a piece of cloth]].

* LudicrousGibs: [[spoiler:Hope Goodgirl explosively decompresses after being crushed by a rather lightweight falling pillar]]. This being A Touch of Cloth, [[UpToEleven the gibs truly]] ''[[UpToEleven are]]'' [[UpToEleven ludicrous]].

** Oldman constantly refers to other officers as "the boys down the station". [[UpToEleven Even when she's in the station.]]

''Des Hairihan:''' It's alright, I understand. This car hasn't got an upstairs.

* ComfortingTheWidow: Parodied. After Jack's wife died he had sex with TheCoroner Natasha... with his wife's body lying next to them.

''A Touch of Cloth'' is a British comedy series which spoofs dark, overwrought British {{Police Procedural}}s, written by Creator/CharlieBrooker and Daniel Maier for Creator/SkyOne. The first two-parter was broadcast in August 2012, with two additional two-parts being broadcasted in 2013 and 2014. Imagine ''Film/TheNakedGun'' or ''Film/{{Airplane}}'', but instead aimed at dark crime dramas like ''Series/{{Luther}}'' or ''Messiah'' (along with most crime shows on TV) and you are heading very much in the right direction. Very silly and very funny.

A spoof of dark, overwrought crime shows, written by Creator/CharlieBrooker for Creator/SkyOne. The first two-parter was broadcast in August 2012, but two more were ordered even before transmission. Imagine ''Film/TheNakedGun'' or ''Film/{{Airplane}}'', but instead aimed at dark crime dramas like ''Series/{{Luther}}'' or ''Messiah'' (along with most crime shows on TV) and you are heading very much in the right direction. Very silly and very funny.

* ItIsPronouncedTroPay: DC Oldman insists you say it "Anne Old Man".

* LineOfSightAlias: Unfortunately for Jack, he's in a scrap metal dealership, and as names for a undercover policeman go "Copper" is a pretty poor one. He gets away with it by [[ItIsPronouncedTroPay insisting it be pronounced "Copére"]]. When he gets Des to join him on the team later, he also chooses a painfully obvious one for an undercover cop; "Sargeant".

'''Todd''': Yeah, I store chains, art... my scrapbook here.

-->'''Jack Cloth''': I haven't laughed since my wife died.
-->'''Anne Oldman''': Why did you laugh when your wife died?

-->'''Jack Cloth''': I haven't laughed since my wife died.
-->'''Anne Oldman''': Why did you laugh when your wife died?

-->'''Mike Macratty''': 20:04, bends down to pick up a discarded bag. Now thats when you come in.
-->'''Jack Cloth''': We'll never fit into that bag.

-->'''Kerry Newblood''': Normally I'd invite you upstairs, but...
-->'''Des Hairihan''': It's alright, I understand. This car hasn't got an upstairs.

* MakingLoveInAllTheWrongPlaces: Spoofed when one of the jurors in Series 1 recalls the steamy sex she had with her lover at the jury room - right there on the desk in front of everyone.

--> '''Tom Boss''': We threw a suspect down the stairs for seven hours.

* PunnyName

-->'''Cloth''': (to a dead body) What happened to you, Albert Stafford?
-->'''Anne''': He can't tell you. [[CaptainObvious He's dead, sir.]]

--->'''Anne''': They shot [[spoiler:Todd]], too.
--->'''Cloth''': Don't tell me he's dead?! [''beat''] Is he dead?
--->[''Anne nods sadly'']
--->'''Cloth''': Argh! I said don't tell me!

-->'''Jemima Symes''': Were the victims gored, with a type of sword?
-->'''Jack Cloth''': Well, that's one line of enquiry...which you can put in your diary.

-->'''Cloth:''' Old''man'', look at my life!
-->'''Oldman:''' I'm a lot like you were!

* MetaCasting: John Hannah has played brooding detectives before, most notably John Rebus of ''Literature/{{Rebus}}''. And Suranne Jones is better known as DS Rachel Bailey in the police procedural [[Series/ScottAndBailey Scott & Bailey]].

* BiTheWay:
** Anne Oldman. Naturally milked as a RunningGag.
--->'''Cloth''': So you're gay?\\
'''Anne''': Bi, Jack.\\
'''Cloth''': [[WhosOnFirst No, don't go, it's none of my business.]]
** The sequel adds [[spoiler: Jack himself, when he [[LastMinuteHookup inexplicably drives off]] with Tom Boss.]]
--->'''Anne:''' [[spoiler:Didn't he kill your wife?]]\\
'''Cloth:''' [[spoiler:No one's perfect.]]\\
'''Anne:''' [[spoiler:You don't belong with him! You're straight!]]\\
'''Cloth:''' [[spoiler:Bi, Anne. ''(leaves)'']]

** Cloth does it to [[spoiler:Tom Boss]] in the season 2 finale. Setting up the [[BiTheWay odd ending.]]

* WorldOfPun: For beginners, lots of fun is had with Cloth and Oldman's last names.

* ParrotExposition: Most gratuitously with [[MrExposition Hairihan]] endlessly repeating himself when talking over the phone to forensics about the murder weapon.

* RhymesOnADime: Jemima Symes from the Rhyming Times.

* LineOfSightName: Unfortunately for Jack, he's in a scrap metal dealership, and as names for a undercover policeman go "Copper" is a pretty poor one. He gets away with it by [[ItIsPronouncedTroPay insisting it be pronounced "Copére"]]. When he gets Des to join him on the team later, he also chooses a painfully obvious one for an undercover cop; "Sargeant".

* IdentifyingTheBody: Parodied. The parents of a murdered teenage girl go to visit their daughter's corpse in the morgue, with the usual uber-dramatic music and slow-mo crying. It turns out that the ethereal music is [[LeftTheBackgroundMusicOn being performed by a choir boy standing to the side]]. Then he suddenly shifts to BowChickaWowWow music, and [[ILoveTheDead unspeakable things happen]].

-->'''Cloth''': So you're gay?\\

* MakingLoveInAllTheWrongPlaces: Spoofed when a woman recalls the steamy sex she had with her lover at a town hall meeting - right there on the desk in front of everyone.