History Quotes / MonsterClown

->There's nothing funny about a clown in the moonlight.
-->-- '''Creator/LonChaney, Sr.'''

->'''Joey:''' Okay, heads is ducks, because...ducks have heads.

-->--''Series/Friends''

'''Cut Man:''' I believe you underestimate the sheer fear-inducing energy a clown possesses. Take SelfDemonstrating/TheJoker for example. For starters, he was played by Creator/JackNicholson. That's kinda scary enough. Then he was played by Creator/MarkHamill, the most evil voice actor in the world. To hell with acting, Mark Hamill WAS the Joker. Also, clowns with chainsaws? ''SCARY AS ALL HOLY HELL.'' That should be outlawed in every place on Earth. Ever. And look at Kefka himself. He looks like he fell off the insanity tree, hit every branch on the way down, then hit a trampoline, and hit them again.\\

->Nicer the man, meaner the clown.

->And laughter rose from the circus tent as the clowns drove on in their happy jalopy and gave balloons to the children, and when they left there were smiles on the faces of nearly all those in the audience, except for the very clever children who sensed that there was more to clowns than bright suits and funny cars and oversized feet, and that if you were wise you didn't laugh at them, and you stayed out of their way, and you never pryed into their business, for clowns are lonely and angry and want company in their misery. They are always seeking, always searching for new clowns to join them...

-->-- '''[[Creator/TimCurry Pennywise the Dancing Clown]]''', ''Film/{{It}}''

[[folder:Tabletop Games]]

->Nozo produces a variety of cartoonish sproings, boings, honks, cuckoos, hee-haws, quacks, giggles, and bloodcurdling screams of hellish agony to keep children amused.
-->-- ''TabletopGame/{{Mortasheen}}''

[[/folder]]

->''"What's a clown doing here? Everyone knows the only thing scarier than a horde of zombies is a clown. Behold the true face of fear!"''
-->-- ''Zombieville USA 2''

->''"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself... and evil clowns."''
-->-- '''Unknown'''

->''"Few things are as hopelessly saturated with the stink of fear and death as a colorful, smiling clown. As my four-year-old son put it after having clowns explained to him: 'So clowns are supposed to be funny, but then they accidentally make you sad and afraid?'"''
-->-- '''[[Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000 Michael J. Nelson]]'''

->''"You know... clowns can get away with murder!"''
-->-- '''John Wayne Gacy''' (allegedly said to taunt police shortly before his arrest)

->''"To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kinda scary. I wondered where this started, and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad."''
-->-- '''Jack Handey'''

->''"Yes... They all float..."'' (referring to balloons [[DoubleMeaning and]] bodies in sewers)\\
''"And when you're down here... with me... [[SuddenlyShouting YOU'LL FLOAT TOO!]]"''
-->-- '''[[Literature/{{IT}} Pennywise the Dancing Clown]]''' (played by the equally scary Creator/TimCurry)

->''TC: I AM GOING TO MOTHERFUCKING KILL ALL YOU MOTHERFUCKERS. ''\\
''TC: and paint the wicked pictures with your motherfuckin blood. ''\\
''TC: FROM YOUR VEINS WILL DRIP MY MIRACLES. ''\\
''TC: your crushed bones will make my special stardust. ''\\
''TC: WELCOME TO THE DARK CARNIVAL, [[KillTheCutie BROTHER.]] ''
-->-- '''Gamzee Makara''', ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}''

->'''Napalm Man:''' The fact of the matter is that [[VideoGame/FinalFantasyVI Kefka]] is nothing more than a glorified clown.\\
'''Cut Man:''' I believe you underestimate the sheer fear-inducing energy a clown possesses. Take SelfDemonstrating/TheJoker for example. For starters, he was played by Jack Nicholson. That's kinda scary enough. Then he was played by Mark Hamill, the most evil voice actor in the world. To hell with acting, Mark Hamill WAS the Joker. Also, clowns with chainsaws? '''SCARY AS ALL HOLY HELL.''' That should be outlawed in every place on Earth. Ever. And look at Kefka himself. He looks like he fell off the insanity tree, hit every branch on the way down, then hit a trampoline, and hit them again.\\
'''Napalm Man:''' But Why would Emperor Ghestahl even have Kefka as a high-ranking member of the military if he looked like a clown?\\
'''Cut Man:''' When you're charging at your enemy, who's charging at you with their weapon drawn... who would you rather see? One of those evil ''LordOfTheRings'' orcs? Or an insane clown?
-->-- '''[[InWilysDefense In Wily's Defense]] [[http://iwd.fetchquest.com/archives.php?type=iwd&c=512 512: Clowns Are Freaking Scary]]'''

->''"There's nothing funny about a clown in the moonlight."''
-->-- '''Creator/LonChaney, Sr.'''

->''"Take the Carnival. Look at 'em, they're really scary. There's nothing more terrifying than a homicidal female clown with a tambourine."''
-->-- '''Superball''', Registered Hero, ''[[VideoGame/CityOfHeroes Paragon City]]''

->''"Why so serious? ...Let's put a [[GlasgowGrin smile]] on that face!"''
-->-- '''TheJoker''', ''Film/TheDarkKnight''

->''"Her pink face was painted pale white, except around her eyes where the white was disrupted by inky black circles. A sloppily painted teardrop decorated her left cheek — but Pinstripe hardly noticed it, or the tinge of green now coloring the ends of her tangled mane.''

->''"He was busy staring at her [[GlasgowGrin scars]]."''

->''"You [[FaceHeelTurn were]] a wonderful clown once. Inventive, funny, outrageous."''
-->-- '''Bellboy''', in ''[[Series/DoctorWho The Greatest Show in the Galaxy]]'', to the Chief Clown, now Chief Collaborator with [[spoiler:the Gods of Ragnarok]] and increasingly sadistic.

->''"Clown smash!"''
-->-- '''Protoclown''', ''TheTick''

->'''''"Run."'''''
-->-- '''The clown from Toaster's nightmare''', ''WesternAnimation/TheBraveLittleToaster''

->''"Nicer the man, meaner the clown."''
-->-- '''Winston the Clown''', ''Literature/ThePiloFamilyCircus''

->''"And laughter rose from the circus tent as the clowns drove on in their happy jalopy and gave balloons to the children, and when they left there were smiles on the faces of nearly all those in the audience, except for the very clever children who sensed that there was more to clowns than bright suits and funny cars and oversized feet, and that if you were wise you didn't laugh at them, and you stayed out of their way, and you never pryed into their business, for clowns are lonely and angry and want company in their misery. They are always seeking, always searching for new clowns to join them..."''
-->-- ''Some Children Wander By Mistake''

->''"With Krinkles the Clown as the mascot, every serving of Sugar Krinkles now had the vitamins and minerals of one handful of flesh and the fear you need to get you going in the morning. The prize inside every box was whispers. Whenever you lost a kitchen knife in 1969, you would somehow always find it inside New Post's Sugar Krinkles. The side of the box had photos of missing children, but each of them was labeled "Ingredients. Sugar Krinkles was eventually pulled from the shelf, but Krinkles the Clown continued to find work. He now appears in mirrors every time you look away from them."''
-->-- ''Website/{{Cracked}}'', [[http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-8-most-baffling-food-mascots-all-time_p2/#ixzz1UFxold00 "The 8 Most Baffling Food Mascots of All Time"]]

->''"And there's this clown... but it's not a very funny clown. He made me realize why I'm so afraid of clowns. [...] He is a psychopathic clown with deep psychological issues who looks like he put on his grandmother's makeup wrong."''
-->-- '''[[WebVideo/BumReviews Chester A. Bum]]''' reviewing ''Film/TheDarkKnight''

'''Commissioner Barbara Gordon:''' In this town, they're never funny.

->''This used to be a funhouse,\\
But now it's full of evil clowns.\\
It's time to start the countdown;\\
[[KillItWithFire I'm gonna burn it down, down,\\
I'm gonna burn it down.]]''
-->-- '''Music/{{Pink}}''', "Funhouse"

->'''Brienne of Tarth''': You are no better than the rest of them. You have robbed and raped and murdered.
->'''Shagwell the Fool''': Oh, I have, I have, I shan’t deny it...but I’m ''amusing'', with all my japes and capers. I make men laugh.
->'''Brienne of Tarth''': And women weep.
->'''Shagwell the Fool''': Is that my fault? Women have no sense of humor.

->'''Nate''': What do you think parents are most afraid of?
->'''Parker''': Clowns.
->'''Nate''': No.
->'''Parker''': Evil clowns?
->'''Nate''': No, Parker.
->'''Parker''': Crazy clowns called Geegee who whisper your name from under your bed?
->'''Nate''': (beat) No.
-->-- {{Leverage}}. "The Toy Job"

->''"Nozo produces a variety of cartoonish sproings, boings, honks, cuckoos, hee-haws, quacks, giggles, and bloodcurdling screams of hellish agony to keep children amused."''
-->-- '''Description of (who else?) Nozo''', ''TabletopGame/{{Mortasheen}}''

->''[[MadnessMantra Can't sleep, clown will eat me... can't sleep, clown will eat me... can't sleep, clown will eat me...]]''
-->-- '''Bart Simpson''', ''Recap/TheSimpsonsS4E10LisasFirstWord''

->''[[YouHaveToBelieveMe You gotta believe me, Mandy!]] The clowns are nothing but [[UltimateEvil ULTIMATE EVIL]]! They wanna be the dominant species on the planet, and they'll destroy us all to make it happen! '''[[BrokenRecord DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL!]]'''''

->'''Wiz''': ''They visit you for birthday parties, cheer you up when you're sad, and probably also want to kill you''
->'''Boomstick''': ''Clowns...''
-->-- '''WebOriginal/DeathBattle'''

->''"Not afraid of the dark? [[DoubleMeaning You don't know Jack!]]"''
-->-- '''{{Tagline}} referring to Jack the Clown''', [[Ride/UniversalStudios Universal's]] Theatre/HalloweenHorrorNights

->'''Batman[=/=]Terry [=McGinnis=]:''' What can you tell me about clowns, Commissioner?\\

->''"What's the matter kid, don't you like clowns? Why? Don't we make ya laugh? Aren't we fuckin' funny? You best come up with an answer, cause I'm gonna come back here and check on you and your mama, and if you ain't got a reason why you hate clowns, '''I'm gonna kill your whole fuckin' family.'''"''
-->-- '''Captain Spaulding''', ''[[Film/TheDevilsRejects The Devil's Rejects]]''

->''"What's the matter kid, don't you like clowns? Why? Don't we make ya laugh? Aren't we fuckin' funny? You best come up with an answer, cause I'm gonna come back here and check on you and your mama, and if you ain't got a reason why you hate clowns, ''I'm gonna kill your whole fuckin' family.''"''
-->-- '''Captain Spaulding''', ''Film/TheDevilsRejects''

-->-- '''Winston the Clown''', ''ThePiloFamilyCircus''

-->-- '''[[MST3K Michael J. Nelson]]'''

-->-- '''[[Literature/{{IT}} Pennywise]] (played by the equally scary Creator/TimCurry)'''

-->--''Fanfic/{{Pagliacci}}'', Chapter 2

-->-- Creator/LonChaney, Sr.

->''"I think I suddenly remember why I'm afraid of clowns. I mean, Bozo is funny but this clown is not. He is a psychopathic clown with deep psychological issues who looks like he put on his grandmother's makeup wrong."''
-->-- '''[[Website/ThatGuyWithTheGlasses Chester A. Bum]]''' in his review on ''Film/TheDarkKnight''.

->''"And there's this clown... but it's not a very funny clown. He made me realize why I'm so afraid of clowns."''

-> "What's a clown doing here? Everyone knows the only thing scarier than a horde of zombies is a clown. Behold the true face of fear!"
-->Zombieville USA 2

->The only thing we have to fear is fear itself... and evil clowns.
--> -- '''Unknown'''

-> ''"Few things are as hopelessly saturated with the stink of fear and death as a colorful, smiling clown. As my four-year-old son put it after having clowns explained to him: 'So clowns are supposed to be funny, but then they accidentally make you sad and afraid?'"''

-->-- Superball, Registered Hero, [[VideoGame/CityOfHeroes Paragon City]]

->''"Why so serious?... Let's put a [[GlasgowGrin smile]] on that face!"''

->''Her pink face was painted pale white, except around her eyes where the white was disrupted by inky black circles. A sloppily painted teardrop decorated her left cheek — but Pinstripe hardly noticed it, or the tinge of green now coloring the ends of her tangled mane.''

->''He was busy staring at her [[GlasgowGrin scars]].''

-->--''{{Fanfic/Pagliacci}}, Chapter 2''

->''You [[FaceHeelTurn were]] a wonderful clown once. Inventive, funny, outrageous.''

-->-- [[Website/ThatGuyWithTheGlasses Chester A. Bum]] in his review on ''Film/TheDarkKnight''.

->''Clown smash!''

->'''''Run.'''''
-->-- '''The clown from Toaster's nightmare''', ''TheBraveLittleToaster''

-->-- '''Winston the Clown,''' ''ThePiloFamilyCircus.''

->''With Krinkles the Clown as the mascot, every serving of Sugar Krinkles now had the vitamins and minerals of one handful of flesh and the fear you need to get you going in the morning. The prize inside every box was whispers. Whenever you lost a kitchen knife in 1969, you would somehow always find it inside New Post's Sugar Krinkles. The side of the box had photos of missing children, but each of them was labeled "Ingredients. Sugar Krinkles was eventually pulled from the shelf, but Krinkles the Clown continued to find work. He now appears in mirrors every time you look away from them.''
-->--Website/{{Cracked}}, '''[[http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-8-most-baffling-food-mascots-all-time_p2/#ixzz1UFxold00 The 8 Most Baffling Food Mascots of All Time]]'''

->''And there's this clown...but it's not a very funny clown. He made me realize why I'm so afraid of clowns.''
-->--'''[[WebVideo/BumReviews Chester A. Bum]]''' reviewing ''Film/TheDarkKnight''

-->--'''Captain Spaulding''', ''Film/TheDevilsRejects''

-->''WesternAnimation/BatmanBeyondReturnOfTheJoker''

-->'''{{Pink}}''', ''Funhouse''

->"You are no better than the rest of them. You have robbed and raped and murdered."
->"Oh, I have, I have, I shan’t deny it...but I’m ''amusing'', with all my japes and capers. I make men laugh."
->"And women weep."
->"Is that my fault? Women have no sense of humor."
-->'''Brienne of Tarth''' and '''Shagwell the Fool''', ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire''

''"And when you're down here with me, you'll float too!"''

->''There's nothing funny about a clown in the moonlight.''
-->-- Lon Chaney, Sr.

->''Take the Carnival. Look at 'em, they're really scary. There's nothing more terrifying than a homicidal female clown with a tambourine.''
-->-- Superball, Registered Hero, [[CityOfHeroes Paragon City]]

->''Why so serious?... Let's put a [[GlasgowGrin smile]] on that face!''