History Quotes / EvilIsPetty

->''[[ItsAllAboutMe Narcissists]] are usually hurtful only when threatened. And [[DiabolicalMastermind Machiavellians]] are too calculating to risk retaliation unless there is a lot on the line. Sadists may be unique in engaging in unprovoked cruelty--cruelty that [[StupidEvil takes effort and has no discernible benefits.]]''
-->-- '''Wray Halbert''', [[http://www.psychologicalscience.org/index.php/news/were-only-human/everyday-sadism-throwing-light-on-the-dark-triad.html "Everyday Sadism - Throwing Light On the Dark Triad"]]

->''Say you are given a quest to get a schoolgirl's cat out of a tree. On average you are given three options: '''Neutral''', where you get the cat down and accept the girl's allowance as payment; '''Good''', where you waive the fee and fondly tousle the girl's hair as she scampers off; and '''ASSHOLE''' where you set fire to the tree and stomp up and down on the schoolgirl's face. And speaking as an asshole, this offends me. There are so many wonderful ways to be a complete ponce that these games don't cater for. Why can't I rescue the cat but hold it for ransom for her dad's porn collection? Or getting the cat out by throwing rocks at it so it breaks all its legs on the concrete and then still expect so be paid up with the logic of a complete tosser?!''
-->-- '''[[WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation Yahtzee]]'''

->"I mean, he's wholly and unapologetically Evil, but more to the point, he's kind of a dick."
-->-- '''Rich Burlew''' on [[Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick Xykon]]

-->-- '''W.H. Auden'''

->'''[[UncannyValley The Unman:]]''' "Ransom?"
->'''[[TheMessiah Ransom:]]''' "What?"
->'''[[HumanoidAbomination The Unman:]]''' "Nothing. Hey."
->'''[[TheStoic Ransom:]]''' "What?"
->'''The Unman:''' "Ransom?"

->'''[[RanmaOneHalf Ranma]]:''' "But this time... I have the upper hand. You see, I washed sheets yesterday but I have not, in fact, changed them out yet today. They are, unbeknownst to them, ravishing each other upon unwashed sheets!"
->'''[[SailorMoon Nephrite]]:''' "Actually... no. They checked and changed them for fresh sheets before they got started."
->*{{beat}}*
->'''Ranma:''' "I... see. I'm going to go kick Jadeite now, while he's still lying prone and defenseless. And then, I'm going to put a set of sheets to wash."

->'''Dr. Polaris:''' *Ahem*
->'''"[[TheFlash Lex Luthor]]:"''' ...What?
->'''Dr. Polaris:''' You gonna wash your hands?
->'''"Lex Luthor":''' No! ... [[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain 'Cuz I'm]] ''[[CardCarryingVillain evil]]''.

->Hmm. I suppose, given my imminent ''godhood'', these primitives should really be beneath my attention. Ah, still. No score is too small to settle, I always say.

->And shares our bed and eats at our own table.''

->''This pattern suggests the disturbing possibility that sadistic types use cruelty to compensate for a general lack of positive emotion in their lives... [[ItsAllAboutMe Narcissists]] are usually hurtful only when threatened. And [[DiabolicalMastermind Machiavellians]] are too calculating to risk retaliation unless there is a lot on the line. Sadists may be unique in engaging in unprovoked cruelty--cruelty that [[StupidEvil takes effort and has no discernible benefits.]]''

->''. This pattern suggests the disturbing possibility that sadistic types use cruelty to compensate for a general lack of positive emotion in their lives.
All of this suggests that sadism may be another, equal dark power—and perhaps even more sinister in a way. Psychopaths have no qualms about hurting others, but their aggression usually has a purpose. Narcissists are usually hurtful only when threatened. And Machiavellians are too calculating to risk retaliation unless there is a lot on the line. Sadists may be unique in engaging in unprovoked cruelty—cruelty that takes effort and has no discernible benefits.''

->Say you are given a quest to get a schoolgirl's cat out of a tree. On average you are given three options: '''Neutral''', where you get the cat down and accept the girl's allowance as payment; '''Good''', where you waive the fee and fondly tousle the girl's hair as she scampers off; and '''ASSHOLE''' where you set fire to the tree and stomp up and down on the schoolgirl's face. And speaking as an asshole, this offends me. There are so many wonderful ways to be a complete ponce that these games don't cater for. Why can't I rescue the cat but hold it for ransom for her dad's porn collection? Or getting the cat out by throwing rocks at it so it breaks all its legs on the concrete and then still expect so be paid up with the logic of a complete tosser?!

->Evil is unspectacular and always human
->And shares our bed and eats at our own table.

->No score is too small to settle, I always say.

->"The last person in the history of creation you want as your enemy is me, and I'll tell you why. Lucifer might be strong, but I'm... '''[[InvokedTrope petty]].'''"

->'''"[[TheFlash Luthor]]:"''' ...What?

->'''"Luthor":''' No! ... [[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain 'Cuz I'm]] ''[[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain evil]]''.

-->-- '''[[UnluckyEverydude Stanley]] to [[{{Satan}} George]]''', ''{{Bedazzled}}''

->'''[[CompleteMonster The Unman:]]''' "Ransom?"

->'''"Luthor":''' No... [[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain 'Cuz I'm]] ''[[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain evil]]''.

->"I mean, he's [[CompleteMonster wholly and unapologetically Evil]], but more to the point, he's kind of a dick."

->"The last person in the history of creation you want as your enemy is me, and I'll tell you why. Lucifer might be strong, but I'm...'''[[InvokedTrope petty]].'''"

-->-- '''[[WebOriginal/ZeroPunctuation Yahtzee]]'''

-->-- '''[[ZeroPunctuation Yahtzee]]'''

-->-- '''[[BeastWars Megatron]]'''

-->-- '''Rich Burlew''' on [[Webcomic/OrderOfTheStick Xykon]]

-->-- '''Zachariah''' ([[LightIsNotGood an Angel]]), ''{{Supernatural}}''

-->-- '''Rich Burlew''' on [[TheOrderOfTheStick Xykon]]

-->--[[ZeroPunctuation Yahtzee]]

->''"I mean, he's [[CompleteMonster wholly and unapologetically Evil]], but more to the point, he's kind of a dick."''
--->-- '''Rich Burlew''' on [[TheOrderOfTheStick Xykon]]

-> Evil is unspectacular and always human
-> And shares our bed and eats at our own table.

->''"The last person in the history of creation you want as your enemy is me, and I'll tell you why. Lucifer might be strong, but I'm...'''[[InvokedTrope petty]].'''''"
-->'''Zachariah''' ([[LightIsNotGood an Angel]]), ''{{Supernatural}}''

->''[[UncannyValley The Unman:]]'' "Ransom?"
->''[[TheMessiah Ransom:]]'' "What?"
->''[[HumanoidAbomination The Unman:]]'' "Nothing. Hey."
->''[[TheStoic Ransom:]]'' "What?"
->''[[CompleteMonster The Unman:]]'' "Ransom?"
--> ''[[TheSpaceTrilogy Perelandra]]'' (He does this all night).

->''[[RanmaOneHalf Ranma]]:'' "But this time... I have the upper hand. You see, I washed sheets yesterday but I have not, in fact, changed them out yet today. They are, unbeknownst to them, ravishing each other upon unwashed sheets!"
->''[[SailorMoon Nephrite]]:'' "Actually... no. They checked and changed them for fresh sheets before they got started."
-> beat
->''Ranma:'' "I... see. I'm going to go kick Jadeite now, while he's still lying prone and defenseless. And then, I'm going to put a set of sheets to wash."
-->[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4817913/1/Lord_Ranma Lord Ranma]], a Ranma 1/2 fanfiction

->''"Your pranks are so miserable."''
-->'''[[UnluckyEverydude Stanley]] to [[{{Satan}} George]]''', ''{{Bedazzled}}''

->'''Dr. Polaris:''' * Ahem*
->'''"[[TheFlash Luthor]]"''': ...What?
->'''Dr. Polaris''': You gonna wash your hands?
->'''"Luthor"''': No... [[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain 'Cuz I'm]] ''[[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain evil]]''.
--> -- ''JusticeLeagueUnlimited''

-->--'''[[BeastWars Megatron]]'''

----
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->''[[HumanoidAbomination The Unman:]]'' "Nothing."