History Quotes / Clichestorm

->"...And the way they write Neo Metal Sonic is very, like, fanfiction-y, "I don't know how to write a villain, so I'm just going to write him to be... the ultimate evil bad guy who's the most powerful-est, evilest, strongest bad guy we've ever encountered before, and he's outsmarted everyone 'cause he's the smartest-est, most brilliant-est, evilest bad guy ever! How are we ever going to defeat him?" And it's scene after scene after scene with Neo Metal Sonic, basically just saying, "Aw, man! This guy's so fuckin' badass!" and I really got tired of it fast."

->''"WHAT'S THIS? THE VAULT HUNTER IS BREAKING INTO TORGUE SECURITY! WHAT A RENEGADE! A [[CowboyCop RENEGADE COP]] WHO DON'T PLAY BY NOBODY'S RULES UNTIL THE COMMISSIONER ASSIGNS HIM [[CanineCompanion A TALKING ROBOT DOG FOR A PARTNER]] WHO HELPS HIM TRACK DOWN [[TheLostLenore THE CRIME SYNDICATE THAT MURDERED HIS FAMILY]] ALL THE WHILE TEACHING HIM [[AnAesop A LITTLE SOMETHING ABOUT LIFE]] IN THE PROCESS THURSDAYS AT NINE!"''

->''So now, to add to the cliche list, you're an undead ChosenOne who has to avenge his master's death. NeverHeardThatOneBefore''

-->-- '''WebVideo/TheAngryVideoGameNerd''' on ''VideoGameDrakeOfThe99Dragons''

->''"You start VideoGame/UntilDawn and it's so fucking excited with itself you have to watch a little video going 'Decisions have consequences! Is your mind blown? Let's hope so because then you won't notice our complete lack of creativity', because the main cast are straight from the teen slasher film default creation wizard. Every single on of them could have their personalities summarised in a single five letter word: [[FinalGirl Brave]], [[MrFanservice Hunky]], [[AlphaBitch Bitch]], [[KidAppealCharacter Funny]], [[ShrinkingViolet Timid]], [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Weird]], [[ReallyGetsAround Whore]], and let's not forget [[TokenMinority Black]]."''

->''"The gameplay is quite adequate. Of course it is; it's been blanketly ripped off. Not a single element of it hasn't been tried and tested in at least three popular previous games. Even the story has been nicked bodily from at least five adventure movies that I can think of -- seven if you let me count all the Indiana Jones films."''

-->--'''Creator/RogerEbert''', review of ''[[https://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/brave-2012 Brave]]''

-->--'''WebVideo/ZeroPunctuation''' on ''VideoGame/UntilDawn''

->''"You start VideoGame/UntilDawn and it's so fucking excited with itself you have to watch a little video going 'Decisions have consequences! Is your mind blown? Let's hope so because then you won't notice our complete lack of creativity', because the main cast are straight from the teen slasher film default creation wizard. Every single on of them could have their personalities summarised in a single five letter word: [[FinalGirl Brave]], [[MrFanservice Hunky]], [[AlphaBitch Bitch]], [[TheBumblebee Funny]], [[ShrinkingViolet Timid]], [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Weird]], [[ReallyGetsAround Whore]], and let's not forget [[TokenMinority Black]]."''

-->--'''WebVideo/ZeroPunctuation''', ''VideoGame/UntilDawn''

[[folder:Web Animation]]

->''"Shall I put us down for Standard [[EasternRPG RPG Fantasy]] package A-12, then? Please direct me to the first of several teenagers we will be enlisting to aid us in [[KillTheGod murdering God.]]"''
-->-- ''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation'' on ''{{VideoGame/Indivisible}}''

[[/folder]]

->''Rule #1: Make sure the hero has a cool name, something to signify that he's a bad-ass and one that reflects what he plans to do with the bad guys. ([[AwesomeMcCoolName John Cutter]] -- CHECK!)\\
Rule #2: Give him a job, one where he's labeled "the best" and make sure it ties into the main conflict of the plot. ([[OverlyNarrowSuperlative Airline securities expert]] -- CHECK!)\\
Rule #3: Personal baggage. Something that haunts him and either takes him out of the game for awhile (so he can get back on the horse when required) or just so we can parallel a flashback with said horse when the need arises. ([[TheLostLenore His wife was killed as a hostage]] during a convenience store robbery that he was unable to prevent -- CHECK!)''
-->-- '''Erik Childress''' on ''Film/Passenger57''

->''This is going to be a ''long'' hour. When these dreadful [[{{Oireland}} Irish caricatures]] started talking about another Irish town where the potatoes stopped growing and the cows stopped giving milk when [[BurnTheWitch a group of spirit folk visited]] I could hear Ireland cutting off diplomatic relations with America.''
-->--'''[[http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/voyager-season-six.html Joe Ford]]''' on ''Series/StarTrekVoyager'', "[[Recap/StarTrekVoyagerS6E17SpiritFolk Spirit Folk]]"

->''It is interesting that this is the show’s first real story about organised crime, but the fact that all of the mobsters in 'Omertà' look like they wandered out of ''Film/MillersCrossing'' would suggest that [[{{Narm}} this might be a good thing]]. Boney, Paulo and Donny arrive in Coker Creek in the most conspicuous manner possible. Boney wears a giant fur coat while attempting to assassinate Eddie with a sniper rifle, which seems like a somewhat unlikely mob hit. More than that, the plot hinges on the contrivance that the only shot that Boney can take on Eddie is a sniper shot [[SoHappyTogether while he plays on a swing with Rose]].''
-->--'''[[http://them0vieblog.com/2015/07/15/millennium-omerta-review/ Darren Mooney]]''' on ''Series/Millennium1996''

->''If the cheap gray suit doesn't tip you off to [[Creator/ChristopherWalken Walken's]] chosen profession, he helpfully waves around the empty coffee cup of [[AndAnotherThing the Shopworn But Still Wily Police Detective.]] I'm surprised he doesn't take a flask from his coat pocket and fill the cup.''
-->-- '''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''' on ''Film/{{Gigli}}''

->''If you ever saw a chase scene from ''Franchise/LawAndOrder'', a movie where a guy has to [[BombDisposal disarm a bomb]], or a scene where someone has to [[TheCaper go undercover in a casino]], watch that instead. Nick Wolfe does all those things, and he does it in the most boring way possible. The only fun that can be derived from most of his scenes is naming off all the movies his character is ripping off from as he speaks.''
-->--''[[http://screamsheet.wordpress.com/2011/01/19/highlander-the-raven/ The Screamsheet]]'' on ''Series/{{Highlander}}: The Raven''

->''If you held a gun to the head of the most secluded Eskimo seal farmer and said, "List California stereotypes," you would not be able to distinguish his list from a ''[[VideoGame/GrandTheftAutoV GTA V]]'' Mission FAQ.''\\
'''Eskimo''': "B-breast implants! Bottled water! T-traffic! ''Please!'' This is no way to write a video game!"
-->--'''Creator/{{Seanbaby}}''', "[[http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-critics-love-about-gta-v-that-actually-suck/ 5 Things Critics Love About GTAV That Actually Suck]]"

->''"They fill all the types for [[SlasherMovie a movie like this]]. They've got the main girl who is [[MrExposition wooden exposition character]]...I believe it's her sister in the movie who's the [[BrattyTeenageDaughter bitchy character]]: it doesn't matter what you're talking about, everything is [='=]''so lame'', and I could be ''anywhere else'' but this dirty prison.' You've got her boyfriend, which is [[BullyingADragon Douchebag Asshole]] character. You know, the one who's like, 'You can shove those keys right up your ass!' [='=]''Ohh'', nice prison, I'd rather talk about DEEZ NUTS!"''
-->--'''Creator/BradJones''' on ''Film/ANunsCurse''

[[folder:Real Life]]

->''In due course we arrive at the Mirror Scene: ''"She was not even comforted by the sight of her naturally rosy skin, her round shoulders, the hair which fell down to her hips and took four buckets of rain water to wash."'' The Nubile Scene: ''"She had always avoided undressing even in front of other women, because she was [[SoBeautifulItsACurse ashamed of her breasts]], which were [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment large, big and generous]] even for a woman of her build."'' Wisdom Phrases: ''"The dangers of beauty are well known: narcissism, irresponsibility, selfishness."'' Or, ''"Evil people always support each other; that is their chief strength."'' [[IceCreamKoan Like Hitler and Stalin?]]''
-->-- '''Creator/GoreVidal''', ''The Top Ten Best Sellers According to the Sunday New York Times as of January 7, 1973''

[[/folder]]

-->--'''[[http://them0vieblog.com/2015/07/15/millennium-omerta-review/ Darren Mooney]]''' on ''Series/{{Millennium}}''

->"WHAT'S THIS? THE VAULT HUNTER IS BREAKING INTO TORGUE SECURITY! WHAT A RENEGADE! A [[CowboyCop RENEGADE COP]] WHO DON'T PLAY BY NOBODY'S RULES UNTIL THE COMMISSIONER ASSIGNS HIM [[CanineCompanion A TALKING ROBOT DOG FOR A PARTNER]] WHO HELPS HIM TRACK DOWN [[TheLostLenore THE CRIME SYNDICATE THAT MURDERED HIS FAMILY]] ALL THE WHILE TEACHING HIM [[AnAesop A LITTLE SOMETHING ABOUT LIFE]] IN THE PROCESS THURSDAYS AT NINE!"

->"Don't you think it's all so droll? The usual stories of Heroes, Princesses, and Demon Lords? Why tell a story we already know? Wouldn't you rather have a bit more fun than that? What will the story hold in store for you now? Ho ho ho..."

->"Shall I put us down for Standard [[EasternRPG RPG Fantasy]] package A-12, then? Please direct me to the first of several teenagers we will be enlisting to aid us in [[KillTheGod murdering God.]]"

->While highly predictable, there wasn't one moment I didn't enjoy in this book.

->"It has an orphan, a dame, and a rusty old fighter nobody believed in, and damned if it doesn't play every terrible cliché completely straight."

->"They fill all the types for [[SlasherMovie a movie like this]]. They've got the main girl who is [[MrExposition wooden exposition character]]...I believe it's her sister in the movie who's the [[BrattyTeenageDaughter bitchy character]]: it doesn't matter what you're talking about, everything is [='=]''so lame'', and I could be ''anywhere else'' but this dirty prison.' You've got her boyfriend, which is [[BullyingADragon Douchebag Asshole]] character. You know, the one who's like, 'You can shove those keys right up your ass!' [='=]''Ohh'', nice prison, I'd rather talk about DEEZ NUTS!"

->"If you've ever seen a sci-fi trope ever, it's in this film."

->"That's all it is. It's just clichés from kids' movies, romantic comedies, bland adventure tales, with nothing charming or fresh thrown on top of it. You're just watching these clichés play out, and nothing else. Clichés are fine, we need them once in a while, but if you're not gonna add anything or give a unique spin on it, it's just clichés and nothing else."

-->-- '''[[https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/4038107465?book_show_action=true Celeste]]''', about ''[[Literature/{{Bravelands Curse of the Sandtongue]]''

->"Shall I put us down for Standard [[EasternRPG RPG Fantasy]] package A-12, then? Please direct me to the first of several [[WakeUpGoToSchoolSaveTheWorld teenagers]] we will be enlisting to aid us in [[KillTheGod murdering God.]]"

-->--'''[[http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/voyager-season-six.html Joe Ford]]''' on ''Series/StarTrekVoyager'', "Spirit Folk"

->''It is interesting that this is the show’s first real story about organised crime, but the fact that all of the mobsters in 'Omertà' look like they wandered out of ''[[Film/MillersCrossing Miller's Crossing]]'' would suggest that [[{{Narm}} this might be a good thing]]. Boney, Paulo and Donny arrive in Coker Creek in the most conspicuous manner possible. Boney wears a giant fur coat while attempting to assassinate Eddie with a sniper rifle, which seems like a somewhat unlikely mob hit. More than that, the plot hinges on the contrivance that the only shot that Boney can take on Eddie is a sniper shot [[SoHappyTogether while he plays on a swing with Rose]].''

-->--'''Creator/BradJones''' on ''[[Film/ANunsCurse A Nun's Curse]]''

->''In due course we arrive at the Mirror Scene: ''"She was not even comforted by the sight of her naturally rosy skin, her round shoulders, the hair which fell down to her hips and took four buckets of rain water to wash."'' The Nubile Scene: ''"She had always avoided undressing even in front of other women, because she was ashamed of her breasts, which were [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment large, big and generous]] even for a woman of her build."'' Wisdom Phrases: ''"The dangers of beauty are well known: narcissism, irresponsibility, selfishness."'' Or, ''"Evil people always support each other; that is their chief strength."'' [[IceCreamKoan Like Hitler and Stalin?]]''

->"That's all it is. It's just clichés from kids' movies, romantic comedies, bland adventure tales, with nothing charming or fresh thrown on top of it. You're just watching these clichés play out, and nothing else. Clichés are fine, we need them once in a while]], but if you're not gonna add anything or give a unique spin on it, it's just clichés and nothing else."