History Main / YouWontFeelAThing

-->-- '''Johnny Carson'''

* ''Film/{{Bedazzled|1967}}'': The Devil offers Stanley seven wishes for his soul. Stanley has misgivings and asks "But if you took it out, wouldn't it hurt?" The Devil replies "It's a perfectly painless operation, and afterwards you won't feel a thing!"

* Lampshaded (then averted) in ''Film/{{Deadpool|2016}}''. [[MadScientist Ajax]] tells Wade Wilson that he ''could'' speak in euphemisms ("This may hurt", "take a deep breath", etc.), but since he's completely insensitive (both [[TheSociopath emotionally]] and [[FeelNoPain physically]]) he doesn't really give a crap, so he just says what he'll actually do: torture Wade mercilessly until his mutant gene activates. Then he proceeds to do exactly that.

* In Film/TheThreeStooges short ''[[Recap/TheThreeStoogesICanHardlyWait I Can Hardly Wait]]'', Curly needs to have a tooth extracted at the dentist, and Moe tries to convince Curly he won't feel a thing by sitting in the patient chair and explaining what will happen. The dentist comes in from the other room, quickly puts Moe to sleep with anesthesia, and proceeds to pull out ''Moe'''s tooth before Curly can tell him that he's supposed to be the patient.

* ''Literature/AbleTeam''. In "Warlord of Azatlan", Carl Lyons [[WorstAid yanks a splinter out of a man's back]] because they can't afford to have him doped up on morphine while they're being hunted by a mercenary army, then quips, "I don't know what you're screaming about, that didn't hurt me at all."

* ''Series/{{Andor}}''. Inverted when Cassian Andor has his blast wound treated by the rebel team on Aldhani, and is informed in advance that they're trying to save their pain meds.
* ''Series/BlakesSeven''. In "[[Recap/BlakesSevenS3E10Ultraworld Ultraworld]]", Avon is subjected to forced BrainUploading and is told, "You will feel nothing. [[EmptyShell Ever again.]]"
* ''Franchise/{{Buffyverse}}:

* ''Series/DarkMatter'': Six goes to a doctor to get treated for an injury, but when the doctor runs a DNA scan he discovers that Six is a wanted man. Six can tell from his OhCrap reaction that something is wrong, so when the doctor goes to inject him with a knockout drug in the guise of a painkiller, Six catches his arm.

* In ''Film/TheIsland'', Doctor Merrick, under the pretense of administering "harmless nice tests", restrains [[Main/YouAreNumberSix Lincoln Echo Six]] to a chair and releases micro-sensors on his face, which then enter his body through the eye socket. Merrick dismisses Lincoln's obvious pain. [[spoiler:Little surprise he's the ''Main/BigBad''.]]

{{Stock Phrase|s}} uttered by a character who is about to do something potentially nasty to someone. They tell their victim that what they are about to do won't hurt at all. This often turns out to be [[BlatantLies a blatant lie]].

* Literature/{{Discworld}} has the troll retrophrenologist truthfully informing his client "This won't hurt [[ExactWords a bit]]" as he readies the mallet. (Phrenology being the pseudo-science based on determining a person's mental state and personality by measuring the skull and variations thereof. Retrophrenology "works" by introducing ''new'' variations to the skull to modify said mental state and personality...)

-->'''Dr. Frink:''' Now you'll feel a slight pinch, followed by an extremely painful pinch...

Definitely TruthInTelevision, as anyone knows who has been to the dentist [[note]]There even is an expression in French, "to lie like a teethripper", presumably based on it [[/note]], although it is increasingly averted as anesthesia gets better and starts to get used more widely. This is also a commonly-used phrase when children who are AfraidOfNeedles are involved.

* ''Fanfic/AdviceAndTrust'' had a variation when [[spoiler: Ritsuko gave Rei an increased dosage of the emotional suppressants that she had spent several painful months purging from her systems. So it's the ''lack'' of pain (and every other emotion) that terrifies her]].

* In ''Film/TheIsland'', Doctor Merrick, under the pretense of administering "harmless nice tests", restrains [[Main/YouAreNumberSix Lincoln Echo Six]] to a chair and releases micro-sensors on his face, which then enter his body through the eye socket. Merrick dismisses Lincoln's obvious pain. [[spoiler: Little surprise he's the ''Main/BigBad''.]]

* ''Series/{{Angel}}'':
** In "[[Recap/AngelS01E10PartingGifts Parting Gifts]]", a demon is about to forcibly remove Cordelia's eyes.
--->'''Demon:''' Now, be a good girl and hold still. This will only hurt a lot.
** "[[Recap/AngelS03E01Heartthrob Heartthrob]]":
--->'''Doctor:''' Now, James, ''[lifts a scalpel]'' this shouldn't hurt ''[starts to slice into James chest]'' [[BaitAndSwitchComment too much]].

* ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer'':
** In their very first fight in "[[Recap/BuffyTheVampireSlayerS2E3SchoolHard School Hard]]". Spike boasts that the last Slayer he killed begged for her life, but...
--->'''Spike:''' Tell you what; as a personal favor, from me to you, I'll make it quick. It won't hurt a bit.\\

** A line cut from "[[Recap/BuffyTheVampireSlayerS2E14Innocence Innocence]]" has Angelus saying, "It won't hurt a bit...[[ColdBloodedTorture after the first hour]]."
** Subverted in "[[Recap/BuffyTheVampireSlayerS2E8TheDarkAge The Dark Age]]":
--->'''Ethan:''' Now this may sting a little, just at first. But don't worry, that'll go away once the searing pain kicks in.
** In "[[Recap/BuffyTheVampireSlayerS6E9Smashed Smashed]]", when Spike is about to eat someone:
--->'''Spike:''' This might hurt a little...
** In "[[Recap/BuffyTheVampireSlayerS3E3FaithHopeAndTrick Faith, Hope and Trick]]", a vampire takes a girl he's met at the Bronze into an alley and tries to bite her, saying, "Stop struggling, this won't hurt." Nope, but the pounding and staking she gives him sure does. Meet Faith, the Vampire Slayer.

* ''Series/StarTrekEnterprise'' episode "Similitude"
-->'''Captain Archer:''' Dr. Phlox is going to have to perform an operation.\\

** In "Singularity", Trip jokingly gives the line while scanning Captain Archer because he's building a custom-made Captain's Chair.
* ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'': The episode [[Recap/StarTrekS2E12TheDeadlyYears "The Deadly Years"]] has three examples while the Enterprise medical staff is trying to figure out why Chekov was not affected by the RapidAging effect that struck the rest of the landing party.
** Downplayed when Dr. [=McCoy=] tells Nurse Chapel to prepare Ensign Chekov for another physical. She tells Chekov, "This won't hurt... much."
** Later on, Chekov complains about the multiple medical exams by repeating what he's been told during them.
--->'''Chekov:''' "Give us some more blood, Chekov. The needle won't hurt, Chekov."
** Dr. [=McCoy=] continues to test Chekov.
--->'''[=McCoy=]:''' Now this isn't going to hurt a bit.\\
'''Chekov:''' That's what you said the last time.\\
'''[=McCoy=]:''' Did it hurt?\\
'''Chekov:''' Yes!
* ''Series/StarTrekDeepSpaceNine''. In "You Are Cordially Invited", Worf brandishes a huge knife at Dr. Bashir for a Klingon bloodletting ceremony and promises that the pain will only last a moment.

* ''Anime/GodzillaCityOnTheEdgeOfBattle''. When Haruo and Yuko are about to be forcibly assimilated by GreyGoo, Galu-gu (a more willing participant) tells them: "It only hurts in the beginning. You'll be at ease soon. Relax and surrender yourself."

* ''Anime/GodzillaCityOnTheEdgeOfBattle''. When Haruo and Yuko are about to be forcibly assimilated by the nanometal, Galu-gu (a more willing participant) tells them: "It only hurts in the beginning. You'll be at ease soon. Relax and surrender yourself."

* ''WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes'': at the climax of "Baby Buggy Bunny," Bugs Bunny has robber Baby Face Finster over his lap spanking him. Bugs quips "Bieve me, Finster, this hurts you more than it does me!"

* ''WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes" at the climax of "Baby Buggy Bunny," Bugs Bunny has robber Baby Face Finster over his lap spanking him. Bugs quips "Bieve me, Finster, this hurts you more than it does me!"

* ''Series/{{Andor}}''. Inverted when Cassian Andor has his blast wound treated on Aldhani, and is informed in advance that they're trying to save their pain meds.

--> There, that wasn't so bad, was it?

* ''Anime/TenchiMuyo'':
-->'''Ryoko:''' I won't hurt you... Too much!

* Hange Zoe in ''Manga/AttackOnTitan'' promises not to hurt the Titan she's fighting...and immediately killed it, saying a variation of this.
-->'''Hange:''' See? Bet you barely felt a thing!

* ''Fanfic/RosarioVampireBrightestDarkness Act III'': In chapter 43, after Tsukune makes the others promise to kill him should the [[RestrainingBolt Holy Lock]] break completely and [[SuperpoweredEvilSide the ghoul resurface]], Mizore promises him that she'll try to make it painless should it come to that. Fortunately, it ''doesn't'' come to that.
* In the ''Manga/{{Naruto}}'' fic ''Fanfic/WhiteRain'', when Rina is ordered to be killed by a Grass genin, said genin uses a poisoned knife and reassures her that it'll be clean and that she'll "barely feel it." However, the genin is reluctant to go through with it, and his hesitation gives Yukio enough time to catch up with them and pull off a BigDamnHeroes moment.
* Defied in the ''[[WesternAnimation/LiloAndStitchTheSeries Lilo & Stitch]]'' fanfic ''[[Fanfic/StarlightSeries Aliens!]]'' when the Boss has captured Senko and is attaching a device to him.
-->'''Boss:''' Now, the difference between me and a doctor is that when I say "this isn't going to hurt a bit," I actually mean it. That is why I'm not going to say a ''thing''.

* Variation in ''WesternAnimation/MonstersVsAliens'':
-->'''Dr. Cockroach:''' Now, you might feel a slight pinch in the brain. [[EvilLaugh Mwahaha...]] Sorry.

* ''Franchise/TheMatrix'': Morpheus [[AvertedTrope averts this]] in [[Film/TheMatrix the first film]] when he tells Neo, "Try to relax. This will feel, a little weird."
* ''Film/TheDayTheEarthStoodStill2008'': Klaatu says "the pain will only be momentary."
* The ''Film/ANightmareOnElmStreet2010'' reboot: "This won't hurt one… little... bit!"
* ''Film/{{Casper}}'':
-->'''Carrigan Crittenden:''' ''[stalking after Dibs, carrying a huge battle axe]'' Damn it, Dibs! This won't hurt a bit!

* One of the tag lines for Creator/MichaelMoore's ''Film/{{Sicko}}'' (a documentary about health care in the US and around the world) is "this may hurt a little". Promotional materials also use "get well soon!"
* ''Film/{{Bedazzled|1967}}'': The Devil offers Stanley seven wishes for his soul. Stanley has misgivings and asks "But if you took it out, wouldn't it hurt?" The Devil replies "It's a perfectly painless operation, and afterwards you won't feel a thing!"
* Beautifully averted in ''Film/{{Hook}}'', where Hook is about to pierce Peter's son's ear and tells him 'Brace yourself, lad, because this is REALLY going to hurt.'

* In Film/TheThreeStooges short ''[[Recap/TheThreeStoogesICanHardlyWait I Can Hardly Wait]]'', Curly needs to have a tooth extracted at the dentist, and Moe tries to convince Curly he won't feel a thing by sitting in the patient chair and explaining what will happen. The dentist comes in from the other room, quickly puts Moe to sleep with anesthesia, and proceeds to pull out ''Moe'''s tooth before Curly can tell him that he's supposed to be the patient.

* In ''Film/SnowDogs'', this is the response that Dr. Brooks (and later his son Ted) give to dental patients who ask if it'll hurt: "A little. More than a tickle, but less than paying your taxes."

* ''Film/XMenDaysOfFuturePast''. As Kitty Pryde is about to send Wolverine's [[MentalTimeTravel consciousness back in time]] she says, "This might sting a little." Cue agonizing scream from Logan and a FadeToWhite... then [[MoodWhiplash he calmly wakes up]] in TheSeventies gazing at a lava lamp, with Roberta Flack's version of "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face" playing on the radio.
* Lampshaded (then averted) in ''Film/{{Deadpool|2016}}''. [[MadScientist Ajax]] tells Wade Wilson that he ''could'' speak in euphemisms ("This may hurt", "take a deep breath", etc.), but since he's completely insensitive (both [[TheSociopath emotionally]] and [[FeelNoPain physically]]) he doesn't really give a crap, so he just says what he'll actually do: torture Wade mercilessly until his mutant gene activates. Then he proceeds to do exactly that.
* ''Film/{{Spectre}}'': As Q prepares to inject Bond with a TrackingDevice:
-->'''Q:''' You may feel a little...''(pushes the needle in)''
-->'''Bond:''' Christ!
-->'''Q:''' ...[[StealthInsult prick]].

* ''Film/HerculesReturns''. Ursus is trying to molest a barmaid. "Aww, come on now, you won't feel a thing. At least that's [[TeenyWeenie what my ex-girlfriends all tell me.]]"

* ''Literature/VorkosiganSaga'': Heavily discouraged by Miles Vorkosigan, when asked for advice on what to tell a kid who needs medical procedures, of which Miles has had a metric ton. His approach is to explain to the kid that yes, this will in fact hurt (if only a little), but that after a while the pain will go away. He also helpfully displays some of the various surgical scars he's acquired over a lifetime of pain as a yardstick for what ''really'' hurting ends up looking like, which calms the kid right down.

* Literature/{{Discworld}} has the troll retrophrenologist truthfully informing his client "This won't hurt [[ExactWords a bit]]" as he readies the mallet. (Phrenology being the pseudo-science based on determining a person's mental state and personality by measuring the skull and variations thereof. Retrophrenology "works" by introducing ''new'' variations to the skull to modify said mental state and personality...)

* In ''Literature/TheMysteriousBenedictSociety'', one of the Recruiters tells the children, "If you children stay nice and still, I promise this won't hurt a bit." The other Recruiter that is with him suggests, "Oh, come on, let's tell the truth for once. Just for kicks." The first Recruiter then admits, "All right, the truth is that this will hurt. A ''lot''. But if you hold still, I promise it won't hurt for ''long''."
* ''Literature/{{Goosebumps}}'' has "Don't Go To Sleep" see main character, Matt, jumping from body to body (and reality to reality) every time he falls asleep. Eventually he is captured by the reality police and is told he will have to drink a potion that will return everything to normal, but also [[NecessarilyEvil kill him]]. [[AffablyEvil Officer Lacy]] tells him that he should try to relax, it's just like going to sleep. It won't hurt.
* Carried to the point of sadism in Joanne Greenberg's ''Literature/INeverPromisedYouARoseGarden,'' when five-year-old Deborah undergoes two operations for urethral cancer. She sees through all the LiesToChildren and suspects they're planning to kill her. It's one of many factors that cause her to lose her mind later in life. And it's TruthInTelevision -- happened to the author.
* In ''Literature/CastleHangnail'', the minions recall that the MadScientist who used to live in the castle often said things like this to his test subjects, and it usually wasn't true.
* ''Literature/AbleTeam''. In "Warlord of Azatlan", Carl Lyons [[WorstAid yanks a splinter out of a man's back]] because they can't afford to have him doped up on morphine while they're being hunted by a mercenary army, then quips, "I don't know what you're screaming about, that didn't hurt me at all."

* ''Series/DarkMatter'': Six goes to a doctor to get treated for an injury, but when the doctor runs a DNA scan he discovers that Six is a wanted man. Six can tell from his OhCrap reaction that something is wrong, so when the doctor goes to inject him with a knockout drug in the guise of a painkiller, Six catches his arm.
-->'''Doctor:''' Look, this won't hurt a bit!
-->'''Six:''' Good. ''(jabs needle into doctor's neck)''
* ''Series/RaisedByWolves2020''. A male and female soldier get a damaged android medic to alter their appearance with plastic surgery so they can escape on TheArk. The man offers to go first, and gets a dose of morphine. At first he's told the pain will be marginal, then later he's told "This will hurt a bit more" and we hear him groaning in agony. By the time the female soldier returns from finding food the surgery is over and it's her turn, so he tells her [[BlatantLies "That didn't hurt a bit."]]

* Averted in Music/EmilieAutumn's "Take the Pill": ''Pull up your skirt, and yes it's going to hurt''.

* {{Inverted|Trope}} by ''VideoGame/TeamFortress2'''s Medic:
-->'''TheMedic:''' All I can tell you about zis next procedure is zat it will be... ''excruciating!''

* Played for BlackComedy in ''VideoGame/RatchetAndClankUpYourArsenal''.
-->'''[[EvilDiva Courtney Gears]]:''' Don't be afraid, [[TheHero Ratchet]]. The transformation doesn't hurt... ''([[EvilLaugh chuckles evilly]])'' [[FalseReassurance much]].

* Doctor Zed's intro cutscene in ''VideoGame/Borderlands2'':
-->'''Hyperion Jerkbag:''' I'm starving! I wanna eat your babies!\\
'''Zed:''' Son, this might sting a little. ''(violently stabs Hyperion jerkbag with gigantic needle)''
* In a math and puzzle-based children's computer game, recreating a black and white image of one man holding a stone slab while another stands over him with a mallet, causes them to have this exchange:
-->'''Man with Mallet:''' Don't worry, this won't hurt a bit!\\
'''Man holding Slab:''' You're darn right it won't, I'm out of here! ''(runs)''
* In the second ''VideoGame/KillerEscape'' game, you're captured and strapped down by an [[DepravedDentist insane dentist]] called the "Tooth Fairy". As she gets ready to torture you with her tools, she utters a variant of this line.
--> '''Tooth Fairy''': Don't worry, this won't hurt a bit...[[BaitAndSwitchComment it's gonna hurt a lot!]]
* ''VideoGame/WorldOfWarcraft'' reintroduced Khadgar to players in the ''Warlords of Draenor'' expansion, who tasked them with retrieving materials to make a legendary-quality ring. The first time he upgrades it, the character takes major damage and he apologizes for neglecting to mention the character would be "slightly killed". The ''second'' time, whereupon the player is more savvy to how this is going to play out, he tells you that it'll barely hurt - and then stops and corrects himself; it will, actually, hurt a lot. (Unsurprisingly, it does.)

* In Telltale's ''VideoGame/TheWalkingDead'' season 2, at one point Clementine has to [[spoiler:help disinfect Kenny's eye, which was severely injured in a previous episode]]. You are given the choice to either say the trope name or be more honest about how painful the procedure is going to be. Or, [[VideoGameCrueltyPotential if you're feeling extra dickish]], [[InvertedTrope make it sound like it's going to be extra painful]].

* ''Webcomic/FriendlyHostility'': Charlotte, a MadScientist in training, uses her father's employee Derringer as a guinea pig for a machine labelled "Schroedinger's Derringer". "Now in a moment you may or may not feel a tingly death ..."
* ''Webcomic/{{Oglaf}}'': [[http://oglaf.com/stalker/2/ Stalker]] (This page SFW, others may not be)
-->'''Nurse 1:''' Yess! We promissse many thingss!\\
'''Nurse 2:''' "Thisss will not hurt" iss our ffavorite!

* In ''Webcomic/SchlockMercenary'', in order to avert this, a specialized way of measuring pain was developed. The doctor can now tell you ''precisely'' how much your pain will rate on the [[ThingOMeter ouchdammitometer]].

* ''WesternAnimation/ThePenguinsOfMadagascar:'' "Roger Dodger":
-->'''Roger:''' A mind-switching machine. Is this gonna hurt?\\
'''Kowalski:''' Just a slight pinch, followed by the brief sensation of a thousand suns exploding in your skull.

* ''WesternAnimation/FostersHomeForImaginaryFriends'', "Seeing Red": Terrance says to Mac before beating him up "This will only hurt for a second." The line becomes a RunningGag throughout the episode, and at the end is given an IronicEcho by Bloo: "Don't worry, it'll only hurt for a week."
* ''[[WesternAnimation/UltimateSpiderMan2012 Ultimate Spider-Man]]'' episode "The Iron Octopus":
-->'''Doc Ock:''' This won't hurt... for long.
* ''WesternAnimation/DocMcStuffins'': The whole clinic staff uttered this exact phrase to an uneasy Niles while trying to get his bandages off. Of course, Niles was expecting it to hurt. Inverted in that they proceeded to carefully take off most of the bandages while Niles wasn't paying attention, so he naturally felt nothing when Doc told him it was time to take them off and pulled a little piece of bandage still on him.

* ''WesternAnimation/TheAdventuresOfJimmyNeutronBoyGenius'': Jimmy Neutron is usually asked this whenever he tests his inventions on his friends.
-->'''Carl:''' Is this gonna hurt?\\
'''Jimmy:''' Oh no, I'll be fine.
* Used twice by Ben in ''WesternAnimation/Ben10'':
** In the [[WesternAnimation/Ben10 original series]], Ben defeats a cyborg Rojo by merging with her as Upgrade and says, "This won't hurt a bit" before adding, "Okay, {{I lied}}".
** In ''[[WesternAnimation/Ben10AlienForce Alien Force]]'', Ben goes on a rampage across Bellwood as Big Chill. His rampage is interrupted by a couple of police officers shooting at him (which Ben evades by going intangible). When Julie begs Ben not to hurt the cops, Ben simply replies "They won't feel a thing" and then freezes them.
* ''WesternAnimation/BuzzLightyearOfStarCommand'' has an extended version while introducing Torque as the Villain of the Week: Zurg, seeing that Torque shares a hatred of Buzz but also lacks the method to act with it, decides to ''tweak'' his genetics a little bit. The catch (of which Zurg is fond) is that the procedure to "power-up" Torque is going to hurt. Very hurt. Very very hurt. Zurg warns Torque just before the operating machinery begins its work; however, the machinery has already been activated and operates very loudly, and Torque can't hear him:
-->'''Zurg:''' ''[as the noise of the operating machine reaches a peak]'' Did I mention the operation will be excruciatingly painful?\\
'''Torque:''' ''What was that, Z?''\\
'''Zurg:''' Oh... ah, never mind! ''[giggles]''\\
''[Zurg exits the operating room and closes the door as we hear Torque begin to scream]''

* Parodied in the ''WesternAnimation/RockosModernLife'' episode "Scrubbin' Down Under," right before Clean Gene the Hygiene Genie is about to use a rather painful-looking drill to get the spinach out of Rocko's teeth, he tells Rocko "Now this is going to hurt you a lot more than it's gonna hurt me."
* ''WesternAnimation/IAmWeasel:'' "I. R.'s Phantom Foot":
-->'''Red Guy:''' This won't hurt...\\
''[Red Guy squeezes Baboon's injured phantom foot together, making him squeal in pain]''\\
'''Red Guy:''' ''...me.''
* ''WesternAnimation/SupermanTheAnimatedSeries''. Inverted in "Main Man" when ComicBook/{{Lobo}} is advancing on Superman brandishing a crowbar.
-->'''Lobo:''' Now, the more you move, the more it's going to hurt, so...[[LovesTheSoundOfScreaming feel free to go crazy]].
* ''WesternAnimation/StarWarsTheCloneWars'': In [[Recap/StarWarsTheCloneWarsS1E10LairOfGrievous "Lair of Grievous"]] Grievous' medical droid says ''"There may be...some discomfort"'' before removing his damaged face plate to replace it. Given the way Grievous screams and shakes when the thing starts to be peeled off, this was a major understatement.

--> '''Doctor''' : Prepare the nerve weasel!
--> '''Sydney''' : That's painless right?
--> '''Doctor''' : Oh my, no.

* ''WesternAnimation/{{Ultimate Spider-Man}}'' episode "The Iron Octopus":