History Main / LieBackAndThinkOfEngland

* In the Arly Hanks mysteries by Joan Hess, Mrs. [=JimBob=]'s mother taught her that a proper wife should lie back and think of England. She takes this recommendation literally, although she'd never understood what England had to do with a small-town Arkansas woman's sex life.

* In ''FanFic/ASparkOfIceAndFire'', Lysa Arryn resorts to this when forced to have sex with the ''much'' older Lord Arryn. To her misfortune, she's eventually force to resort to this ''again'' when she's captured by the Ironborn, taken to Pyke, and made Aeron Greyjoy's Salt Wife.

-->'''James Bond:''' My dear girl, don't flatter yourself. What I did this evening was for Queen and country. [[StealthInsult You don't think it gave me any pleasure]], do you?

* In ''Literature/NineteenEightyFour'', [[{{Newspeak}} "goodthinkful"]] women are taught to call sexual intercourse "our duty to the Party". Of course, men are discouraged from enjoying sex as well, and it's the Party's goal to get it seen as a disgusting but necessary act because the Party doesn't want anyone to feel devotion or attachment to anything but the Party. Marriages between Party members have to be approved by a committee which rejects couples who seem to be attracted to one another. It's also mentioned that the Party's scientists are working on altering the nervous system to remove the orgasm entirely.

* Subverted, justified and gender-switched in ''Literature/MixBeerWithLiquorAndYouWillGetSicker''. Lauchlan goes into his relationship with near to no knowledge of male to male relations beyond [[IkeaErotica tab A goes into slot B]]. He actually believes that the dominant partner will be the only participant who feels pleasure and resigns himself to performing this trope. Thankfully, [[IdealizedSex Corbin is quick to disillusion him]].

* ''Literature/TheLovers'': in the Haijac Union people are supposed to have sex only for reproductive purposes and take no pleasure out of it, [[DoubleThink though they must still have it out of love between husband and wife]]. One of the things that draw Hal away from from his Sigmenite beliefs is that Jeannette, with whom he has sex out of ''actual'' love, is much better at it than his wife (that he divorced when he became an astronaut) ever was.
* ''Literature/TheWarAgainstTheChtorr''. [=McCarthy=] is so nervous about making love to ColonelBadass 'Liz' Tirelli that to get him to lighten up she strips naked, wraps herself in the American flag and orders him to make love for his country. The next day [=McCarthy=] is miffed when the colonel reverts to her usual IceQueen demeanor in public, only to crack up laughing on seeing she's wearing a tiny flag pin.

* Played with in ''Series/{{Scrubs}}''; generally, any time they pull out the "[[LysistrataGambit women have power over men because they can go longer without sex]]" joke plays it straight. One episode, less so: Carla's hoop for Turk is to prove to her that he truly knows her, which he does by giving her a gift which is relevant to who she is as a person rather than the generic flowers or chocolate (in this case, a pen, because she loves to write everything down). So when he learns, and subsequently puts off sex to tell her, that it turns out the lost-and-found box where he got it is actually an " ass-and-found box", she almost tells him he doesn't get any... until she realizes he pretty much just did exactly what she told him better than any gift ever could. What's weird with ''Series/{{Scrubs}}'' is that they had one episode where Carla freaks out because she wasn't able to have an orgasm and apparently that had never happened to her before. Clearly, she does enjoy sex.

* In ''Series/IntoTheBadlands'', Lydia tries to council Veil with her inevitable ForcedMarriage to Quinn, telling her that she has to go through with it for her and her infant son's sake. [[spoiler: Luckily, the marriage is not consummated.]]

** The Qunari religion forbids the traditional family unit in favor of raising children in state-run orphanages, and this is part of that. Qunari are told who to breed with and when; they have no choice in the matter and are encouraged to treat it the same as any other duty to the state. That being said, recreational sex ''is'' allowed. It's treated as an appetite that needs to be filled, no different than hunger or thirst and given no special importance. The Qunari seem to find the way everyone else considers sex the most important thing to be very strange ("We have friends, we just don't have sex with them"). In fact, the same caste that takes care of children, the elderly, and medical needs has people who specialize in providing sex when Qunari need it.

** In another episode, Peggy has to be a substitute teacher for... (dramatic chord) ...a sex ed class. She discusses her concerns about whether she can teach it with some of her female friends, and one of them brings up a book that apparently a lot of them were given when they were young by their parents instead of an actual talk or class -- which just contained pictures of "flowers", according to a young Peggy in a flashback. Peggy dismisses the book as "worthless", while one of her friends says she "got a lot out of it"... because she could close her eyes and imagine the flowers while her husband was having sex with her.

-->'''Queen of England''': That's right, love. For centuries, the Farnsworth gentleman have provided service to the Queen. Now, close your eyes and think of England.

* In ''VideoGame/DivinityDragonCommander'', you may marry the cold and practical [[IceQueen Princess Camilla]], who also serves as the Supreme Justice of [[LizardMen her people]]. If you encourage her to be a HangingJudge in her rulings, she will harden into a more LawfulNeutral character. Eventually, she will tell you that if the issue of heirs should arise, she will simply close her eyes "and think of Justice."

* In the poem ''Bored Courtesan'' this is a subversion, as the titular courtesan isn't thinking of anything besides doing the deed (she's interested and is wanting to do it) and neither is she fulfilling her "duties" while she thinks.

[[AllWomenArePrudes For women]], sex is a chore, a duty that must be endured. [[CriticalResearchFailure God knows they don't enjoy the sex act.]] Feigning headaches, stomachaches and menses can only postpone the dreaded inevitable. Then it's time to grit your teeth, hike your skirt, Lie Back and Think of England.

* ''Literature/TheWarAgainstTheChtorr''. [=McCarthy=] is so nervous about making love to BadassColonel 'Liz' Tirelli that to get him to lighten up she strips naked, wraps herself in the American flag and orders him to make love for his country. The next day [=McCarthy=] is miffed when the colonel reverts to her usual IceQueen demeanor in public, only to crack up laughing on seeing she's wearing a tiny flag pin.

* ''Series/StargateAtlantis'', episode "The Return: Part 2":

* ''Fanfic/RocketshipVoyager''. Captain Janeway gets into an argument with Chakotay over why he turned rebel for the Maquis. Chakotay brings up an incident where Janeway mutinied against a captain who wanted to use his female crewmembers as a colony BabyFactory and snarks, "Shouldn't you girls have just closed your eyes and thought of the Tri-World Federation?"

** This also comes up when people find themselves in an undesired ArrangedMarriage. Dorian discusses the matter with how his own parents utterly despised each other and only did the bare minimum to preserve their status, [[OnlyChildSyndrome neatly explaining Dorian's lack of siblings]]. They in turn expected Dorian to do the same with his betrothed, not seeming to be able to comprehend that [[IncompatibleOrientation this idea repulsed him on a much deeper level]].

* This phrase is used '''a lot''' in ''Manga/AxisPowersHetalia'' fanfiction. As in, a LOT (but it's usually a ''massive'' inversion of the trope). It's somewhat played straight in [[http://solequeene.livejournal.com/10987.html this fic]], which has ''UsefulNotes/QueenVictoria'' herself literally doing this.

* Done in the ''Frozen'' fanfic ''FanFic/IceOnTheRhine'', where Elsa has a marriage/procreation agreement with Napoleon (yes, that Napoleon) and on her wedding night, she lies back and thinks of Arendelle. However, in Elsa's case, it's less dislike of sex and more due to political calculus.
* In ''{{Fanfic/Hivefled}}'' [[PirateGirl Mindfang]] manages to secure protection against Dualscar for herself and The Dolorosa by having [[ThreeWaySex both of them]] have sex with [[BigBad The Grand Highblood]], and keeps this sort of attitude during it to keep her disgust at bay. She also thinks to herself that she'll [[LaserGuidedAmnesia wipe Dolorosa's mind of it afterward]] to spare her from remembering it.

* ''Literature/TheEyesOfTheDragon'': A rare male example; King Roland is uninterested in women (and might possibly be asexual, the concept didn't exist when the novel was written) and the narrator says that he's rather afraid of them. Nevertheless, he's the king, so he has to marry and produce an heir, and ends up married to a teenage noblewoman named Sasha. Though the two quickly grow to genuinely love each other, their sex life is dependent on a potion prepared by Roland's court magician Flagg because Roland can't become aroused without it, except on one very exceptional occasion - after Roland killed a dragon during a hunt, he was so invigorated by the experience that he didn't need the potion, and the resulting tryst led to the conception of their first son, Peter.

-->'''Amos:''' ''(with mock gravitas)'' When in doubt, close your eyes, think of England.

* In ''Literature/DragonBones'' it is implied that that was [[MaritalRapeLicense how sex worked for Ward's parents.]] At best. Averted with other women; while the marriage bed of the queen is probably this (the king prefers young men, anyway, and he's a jerk), she does have a younger lover, who, it seems, is .. talented, judging from the noises that his brother, who sits in the room next to the bedroom where things are happening, complains about.
* In ''Literature/NineteenEightyFour'', [[{{Newspeak}} "goodthinkful"]] women are taught to call sexual intercourse "our duty to the Party." Of course, men are discouraged from enjoying sex as well, and it's the Party's goal to get it seen as a disgusting but necessary act because the Party doesn't want anyone to feel devotion or attachment to anything but the Party. Marriages between Party members have to be approved by a committee which rejects couples who seem to be attracted to one another. It's also mentioned that the Party's scientists are working on altering the nervous system to remove the orgasm entirely.

* In ''Literature/ABrothersPrice,'' Jerin fears that he may have to do this, as he dreads being married to the [[ExoticExtendedMarriage daughters]] of the neighbouring Brindle family. Eventually, [[spoiler: he marries a group of sisters (one of whom was raped by her previous husband) and does a something that looks suspiciously like a "mount him and think of England" variant of this. They do cuddle affectionately, though.]]

-->'''Lisa:''' Just close your eyes and think of Milhouse. [chuckles]

-->-- ''[[http://www.snopes.com/weddings/newlywed/advice.asp Instruction and Advice for the Young Bride]] [[LongTitle on the Conduct and Procedure of the Intimate and Personal Relationships of the Marriage State for the Greater Spiritual Sanctity of this Blessed Sacrament and the Glory of God]]''[[note]]not authentic in the slightest -- but funny[[/note]].

The sentiment "AllWomenArePrudes" is also used and is not as severe. It is also used as an InvertedTrope, one used to ''prolong'' a sexual experience: when a man is reaching the point of no return, he may get in the habit of thinking of something else to try and muster up some more stamina. Thinking of baseball (or cricket, or some other sport --perhaps even one in which balls are ''not'' struck with some form of stick) is especially common. Thinking of [[Film/AustinPowers Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day]] is a terrifying last resort recommended only for characters in comedies (... however, young men in Latin American countries were often recommended to think of Music/CeliaCruz--before her death, that is--although Mexican men prefer [[EvilMakesYouUgly Elba Esther Gordillo]]).

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* Mentioned in the ''ComicBook/{{Thor}}'' fanfic Between Worlds, during a flashback showing Loki taking a young noblewoman to bed. She invokes this (replace England with Asgard), thinking that he will not let her enjoy the experience. [[spoiler: She's wrong]].
** There's also a fic that has it that Loki, as the second/lesser prince, was "encouraged" by Odin to use his wiles on various noblemen to make them more amenable to Asgard's interests. Whether he cared to use his body that way or not.

* In ''{{Fanfic/Hivefled}}'' [[PirateGirl Mindfang]] manages to secure protection against Dualscar for herself and The Dolorosa by having [[ThreeWaySex both of them]] have sex with [[BigBad The Grand Highblood]], and keeps this sort of attitude during it to keep her disgust at bay. She also thinks to herself that she'll [[LaserGuidedAmnesia wipe Dolorosa's mind of it after]] to spare her from remembering it.

* A RareMaleExample in ''[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/5320397/chapters/12283199 A Northern Dragoness]]'' when Jonnel Stark tries to protest about his ArrangedMarriage. When he wonders if his bride was refused by the king for being ugly, [[NoSympathy his father]] merely answers Jonnel will have to bed her with his eyes closed.
* In the Literature/JaneEyre fic ''[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/91216 Mustard Seed]]'', Mrs. Fairfax gives this as advice to Jane on her wedding night. Jane isn't thrilled with the idea.

* Another male example appears in [[https://m.fanfiction.net/s/12603863/4/ A PostGraduate Sitch]]. Ron, as part of a eugenics program, has to impregnate a few women, but he tries very hard not to enjoy the experience because said women are not Kim.

-->'''Amos:''' ''(with mock gravitas)'' When in doubt; close your eyes, think of England.

* Invoked word for word in the {{Podcast/Rifftrax}} of ''Film/TheRoom''. Michelle is trying to convince Lisa that it's wrong to cheat on Johnny. As Michelle leaves, she reminds Lisa to "think about what I said." Kevin says "Just lie back and think of England." In this case, though, it isn't so much that anyone thinks Lisa shouldn't enjoy sex, but because Johnny looks like "[[{{Gonk}} a catfish in a suit]]."

* In ''Literature/ABrothersPrice'' Jerin fears that he may have to do this, as he dreads being married to the [[ExoticExtendedMarriage daughters]] of the neighbour family Brindle. Eventually, [[spoiler: he marries a group of sisters one of whom was raped by her previous husband, and does a something that looks suspiciously like a "mount him and think of England" variant of this. They do cuddle affectionately, though.]]

* In the Literature/GemmaDoyle books, Felicity mentions this trope when the girls find a picture of a man and woman having sex. Though all four girls have sex drives to some extent (Gemma kisses Kartik and gets aroused, Felicity and Pippa are {{Lipstick Lesbian}}s), so they laugh when the phrase is brought up.

* In the Arly Hanks mysteries by Joan Hess, Mrs. JimBob's mother taught her that a proper wife should lie back and think of England. She takes this recommendation literally, although she'd never understood what England had to do with a small-town Arkansas woman's sex life.

* ''Literature/TheEyesOfTheDragon'': A rare male example; King Roland is uninterested in women (and might possibly be asexual, the concept didn't exist when the novel was written) and the narrator says that he's rather afraid of them. Nevertheless, he's the king, so he has to marry and produce an heir, and ends up married to a teenaged noblewoman named Sasha. Though the two quickly grow to genuinely love each other, their sex life is dependant on a potion prepared by Roland's court magician Flagg because Roland can't become aroused without it, with one major exception - after Roland killed a dragon during a hunt, he was so invigorated by the experience that he didn't need the potion, and the resulting thryst led to the conception of their first son, Peter.

* In ''Series/WillAndGrace,'' when Jack is dating Beverly Leslie (Karen was forcing him to be with Beverly because she was broke and he was rich) he mentions that he doesn't really want to stay with him and doesn't want to "do it." Karen simply saying, "Oh you'll do it. You'll do it the same way any self-respecting woman does. Get on your back, point your heels to Jesus and think of handbags."

** After she's married and home from her honeymoon Lane tells Rory that her first time was so awful (on the beach at sunrise, with the cold water and the sand ...) that she's convinced no woman ever sincerely enjoys it.
** In another (humorous) reference to this, Rory gives Lorelai advice in the Living Pictures episode that in order to stay still she should "Close your eyes and think of England".

* Played with in ''Series/{{Scrubs}}''; generally, any time they pull out the "[[LysistrataGambit women have power over men because they can go longer without sex]]" joke plays it straight. One episode, less so: Carla's hoop for Turk is to prove to her that he truly knows her, which he does by giving her a gift which is relevant to who she is as a person rather than the generic flowers or chocolate (in this case, a pen, because she loves to write everything down). So when he learns, and subsequently puts off sex to tell her, that it turns out the lost-and-found box where he got it is actually an " ass-and-found box", she almost tells him he doesn't get any...until she realizes he pretty much just did exactly what she told him better than any gift ever could. What's weird with ''Series/{{Scrubs}}'' is that they had one episode where Carla freaks out because she wasn't able to have an orgasm and apparently that had never happened to her before. Clearly, she does enjoy sex.

** Ever on the lookout for new ways to antagonize his son-in-law Arthur, Leodagan gets him to participate in a clan tradition after pacifying rebels: the victorious leader must rape the defeated chief's eldest daughter (Arthur is understandably disgusted but Leodagan threatens to secede if the king refuses to honor his alies' traditions). So Arthur enters and explains to the girl that he's willing to act as though he'd raped her, but it turns out the girl is the chief's second-eldest daughter who was very much looking forward to it (Arthur being known as one of the few men in Britain who bathes and has romantic ideals), to the point that she'd persuaded her sister to switch places. As Arthur continues to refuse to do the deed after they come to an agreement (he'll make her one of his official mistresses and she'll live at Kaamelott), she ends up threatening to rape ''him'' at swordpoint.

* Punned by ''Music/{{Skyclad}}'' as "[[PoliticallyCorrectHistory Think Back And Lie Of England]]".

* After Pip Bin's marriage to Ripely Fecund in ''Radio/BleakExpectations'', she lies back and thinks of England ... while he lies back on another bed 30 feet away and thinks of Scotland and Wales. Thereby achieving [[IncrediblyLamePun union]].

** The Qunari religion forbids the traditional family unit in favor of raising children in state-run orphanages, and this is part of that. Qunari are told who to breed with and when; they have no choice in the matter and are encouraged to treat it the same as any other duty to the state. That being said, recreational sex ''is'' allowed. It's treated as an appetite that needs to be filled no different than hunger or thirst and given no special importance. The Qunari seem to find the way everyone else considers sex the most important thing to be very strange ("We have friends, we just don't have sex with them"). In fact, the same caste that takes care of children, the elderly, and medical needs has people who specialize in providing sex when Qunari need it.

** In another episode, Peggy has to be a substitute teacher for ... (dramatic chord) ... a sex-ed class. She discusses her concerns about whether she can teach it with some of her female friends, and one of them brings up a book that apparently a lot of them were given when they were young by their parents instead of an actual talk or class -- which just contained pictures of "flowers", according to a young Peggy in a flashback. Peggy dismisses the book as "worthless", while one of her friends says she "got a lot out of it"... because she could close her eyes and imagine the flowers while her husband was having sex with her.

** Name-dropped in another episode where Hank and Cotton send Bobby to a military school. At lights out, the instructor tells the boys to be ready for their upperclassmen's "[[InitiationCeremony welcoming party]]". Bobby, upon hearing a noise, tells the boy at the next bunk "Lie back and think of England!" This was actually told to him by Peggy, who admits she isn't sure what it means. Bobby does it literally, thinking of typical British things like Literature/PaddingtonBear and the Music/SpiceGirls. (It was TheNineties.)

-->'''Queen of England''': That's right, love. For centuries, the Farnsworth gentleman has provided service to the Queen. Now, close your eyes and think of England.

--> '''Watson''': And then, five months later, a stillborn, premature baby the size of a Digestive biscuit!

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''[[OrphanedPunchline "I think I'll paint the ceiling beige...Yeah, beige, to match the curtains."]]''
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* In the Literature/JaneEyre fic "[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/91216 Mustard Seed]]'', Mrs. Fairfax gives this as advice to Jane on her wedding night. Jane isn't thrilled with the idea.

* A RareMaleExample in ''[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/5320397/chapters/12283199 A Northern Dragoness]] when Jonnel Stark tries to protest about his ArrangedMarriage. When he wonders if his bride was refused by the king for being ugly, [[NoSympathy his father]] merely answers Jonnel will have to bed her with his eyes closed.
* In the Literature/JaneEyre fic "[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/91216 Mustard Seed]], Mrs. Fairfax gives this as advice to Jane on her wedding night. Jane isn't thrilled with the idea.

** In another episode, Peggy has to be a substitute teacher for ... (dramatic chord) ... a sex-ed class. Discussing with her female friends the teaching horrors that await her, she shows them the sex-ed textbook she used while growing up -- which just contains pictures of "flowers." One of her friends says she used the same textbook, and that it was EXCELLENT... because she could close her eyes and imagine the flowers while her husband was having sex with her.
--->'''Peggy:''' Oh, you poor thing.

* ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'': Parodied in "V Is For Mystery", which is a parody of Franchise/SherlockHolmes. Dr Watson (Brian) is talking about his upcoming wedding, and describes the wedding night this way, making it sound thouroughly unpleasant for both participants, but is actually ''excited'' about it.