History Main / FirstRuleOfTheYard

* Parodied in ''WesternAnimation/TheOwlHouse": After seeing how worried Luz is about starting school in "The First Day", Eda gives her the advice of walking up to the first student she sees and punching them in the face "to establish dominance".

"To show them all you're tough."\\\

He grabbed and squeezed and paused to gloat -\\
\\
And went to jail that night.\\
\\

"To show them all you're tough."\\
\\

"I hear you've all got tiny ''dicks''!"\\
\\

Whether it is a temporary jail-cell in a small-town precinct or a [[HellholePrison privately owned maximum-security nightmare]], you are likely to be stuck in an enclosed area full of tough-as-nails, neck-tat hooligans who will either [[KnifeNut poke you full of holes]] or [[PrisonRape plug the holes you already have]] at the first sign of weakness. MightMakesRight and dog-eat-dog in a place full of serial-killers and thugs who think that ViolenceIsTheOnlyOption and you need to send a message that you ain't ''nobody's'' bitch.

* In the ''Series/ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia'' episode "[[Recap/ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphiaS04E09DennisReynoldsAnEroticLife Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life]]", Frank and Mac knock Dennis unconscious with a nail-gun and drive nails into his hands with it to fake a stigmata in order to act out the fictional parts of Dennis's erotic memoir to legitimize them. ItMakesSenseInContext. When he wakes up, he finds himself in the rehabilitation center that Frank and Mac left him in, only to be verbally assaulted by Creator/{{Sinbad}} and his "bitch" Music/RobThomas. His entire stay there, Dennis is abused by Sinbad, who acts as though they are in a prison that Sinbad tries to be dominate one in, made especially funny when the employees don't run it like a prison and Sinbad pretends to be affable when they are around. [[spoiler: Considering we find out later that the clinic is actually just an empty warehouse and that Sinbad is a figment of Dennis's [[SurprisinglyRealisticOutcome concussed]] imagination, Sinbad's role as the ScaryBlackMan is all just a part of Dennis's own WrongGenreSavvy.]]

-->'''Sonic:''' They wanted to put me in the beginners' class with the little kids! I can't be swimming around with a bunch of five-year-olds! They can be so cruel when they sense weakness!\\

[[quoteright:350:[[Film/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/first_rule_of_the_yard.png]]]]
[[caption-width-right:350:''"Let's make something clear. This one here's our booty! You wanna get to him, you go through us! Or more accurately... We go through you!!"'']]

-> ''"First rule of the yard, fuck-face: find the biggest guy and make him your--"''

* Inverted in ''ComicBook/ThePunisherMAX'' story "The Cell". As Frank is escorted to his cell, the wardens (who aren't even hiding that they're on the take) stop to introduce him to the most dangerous guy in Riker's, a ScaryBlackMan nicknamed Squeaky Pete ([[PrisonRape "he don't like usin' lube"]]), and promise that Frank will face him very soon. Frank's response is to take out his wardens and then kill Pete in the next few seconds before telling them to send the ''next'' most dangerous.

* In ''Film/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy'', after Peter, Groot, Rocket and Gamora wind up at the Kyln, a big blue inmate caresses Peter inappropriately, implying he plans on raping him, before Groot grabs him by his nostrils. Rocket proceeds to make it clear to all of the other prisoners that Peter belongs to him and that anyone who even thinks of going after them has to get past Groot.

* Deconstructed in ''Film/ShotCaller''. Jacob Harlon realizes that he has to win favor with one of the local prison gangs for protection, so when a random inmate challenges him in front of them, he immediately starts a fight to save face. They take him in afterwards, but their subsequent demands for him to smuggle drugs only ends up drawing him further and further into the gang.

[[folder: Web Animation]]

-->-- '''Russell Collins''' (before one of Black Tom Cassidy's thug punches him in the face), ''Film/Deadpool2''

[[quoteright:350:[[Film/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/groot_root_brain.jpg]]]]

* In ''Film/Deadpool2'', both Deadpool and Russell Collins wind up in the [[PunishmentBox Ice-Box]], a HellholePrison designed to [[ExtranormalPrison imprison dangerous mutants]]. Familiar with the trope, Russell stashes a pen in "[[AssShove the old prison wallet]]" with the intent of finding the toughest prisoner there and shanking him with it. When he tries invoking it on Black Tom Cassidy, he gets punched in the face for his trouble. Undeterred, he tries several more times and suffers a worse beating each time. Deadpool eventually chides him for it and points out how this will end, and advises Russell befriend the toughtest guy instead. He takes this to heart and has success with the ''actual'' toughest guy in the slammer, [[spoiler:Juggernaut]], who has to be kept in a separate cell.

* In the ''Series/ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia'' episode "[[Recap/ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphiaS04E09DennisReynoldsAnEroticLife Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life]]", Frank and Mac knock Dennis unconscious with a nail-gun and drive nails into his hands with it to fake a stigmata in order to act out the fictional parts of Dennis's erotic memoir to legitimize them. ItMakesSenseInContext. When he wakes up, he finds himself in the rehabilitation center that Frank and Mac left him in, only to be verbally assaulted by Creator/{{Sinbad}} and his "bitch" Music/RobThomas. His entire stay there, Dennis is abused by Sinbad, who acts as though they are in a prison that Sinbad tries to be dominate one in, made especially funny when the employees don't run it like a prison and Sinbad pretends to be affable when they are around. [[spoiler: Considering we find out later that the clinic is actually just an empty warehouse and that Sinbad is a figment of Dennis's [[RealityEnsues concussed]] imagination, Sinbad's role as the ScaryBlackMan is all just a part of Dennis's own WrongGenreSavvy.]]

* Variation in ''Film/AmericanHistoryX''. Derek Vinyard is sentenced to two years in prison for manslaughter, and knows he has to join a gang to survive. He does this by deliberately working out in front of a black gang with his massive swastika chest tattoo on full display, in view of a group of onlooking Neo-Nazi gang members.

-->''When Little Timmy grabbed a throat\\
And held it'' very ''tight,\\

"I hear you've all got tiny ''dicks!''"\\

And Timmy fucking died.''

* Inverted in ''ComicBook/ThePunisherMAX'' story "The Cell". As Frank is escorted to his cell, the wardens (who aren't even hiding that they're on the take) stop to introduce him to the most dangerous guy in Riker's, a ScaryBlackMan nicknamed Squeaky Pete ([[PrisonRape "he don't like usin' lube"]]), and promise that Frank will face him very soon. Frank's response is to take out his wardens and then kill Pete in the next few seconds before telling them to send the next most dangerous.

* In ''Film/Deadpool2'', both Deadpool and Russell Collins wind up in the [[PunishmentBox Ice-Box]], a HellholePrison designed to [[ExtranormalPrison imprison dangerous mutants]]. Familiar with the trope, Russell stashes a pen in "[[AssShove the old prison wallet]]" with the intent of finding the toughest prisoner there and shanking him with it. When he tries invoking it on Black Tom Cassidy, he gets punched in the face for his trouble. Russell has more success by making buddies with the ''actual'' toughest guy in the slammer, [[spoiler:Juggernaut]], who has to be kept in a separate cell.

-->-- '''Russell Collins''' before one of Black Tom Cassidy's thug punches him in the face, ''Film/Deadpool2''

!!Examples

[[folder: Comic Books]]

[[folder: Fan Works]]

[[folder: Films -- Animation]]

[[folder: Films -- Live-Action]]

[[folder: Live-Action TV]]

* Parodied in ''Series/TheBigBangTheory'' when Sheldon Cooper - a character who might otherwise be thought to be vulnerable - is briefly imprisoned. Thrown into a holding cell, he is appraised by the other inmates in a way that he is oblivious to and which might not augur well if played for drama. Instead, Sheldon glares at the big, hard, tough looking con in the place nearest the door and says "You're in my spot". Figuring that anyone that harmless-looking who is willing to get in his face must be a [[KillerRabbit real maniac psycho]], the tough-looking con surrenders the spot. Sheldon is unmolested.
* [[ParodiedTrope Parodied]] in ''Series/{{Blackish}}''. When Junior is kicked out of his private school and has to go to public school, everyone in the family is worried. Zoe tells him that surviving in public school is easy: you just find the biggest kid and pick a fight with him. Junior has a chair lifted to hit said kid in the head when he overhears the kid's conversation about ''Harry Potter'' and makes friends with him instead.

[[folder: Video Game]]

[[folder: Web Original]]
Website/TheOnion: [[https://local.theonion.com/biggest-guy-in-prison-tired-of-every-new-inmate-beating-1827063562 Biggest Guy In Prison Tired Of Every New Inmate Beating Shit Out Of Him On Their First Day]]

[[folder: Western Animation]]
* In the ''WesternAnimation/BlackDynamite'' episode [[Recap/BlackDynamiteS1E3TaxesAndDeathOrGetHimToTheSunsetStrip "Taxes and Death" or "Get Him to the Sunset Strip!"]], Black Dynamite and Creator/RichardPryor get thrown in a jail cell when Richard recklessly fires Black Dynamite's [[CoolGuns Cool Gun]] and shoots a tire on a police car. In the cell, the unprovoked Richard decides to issue ultimatum to the other cellmates that the improbably cool Black Dynamite will "whoop [their] ass[es]" if they try anything. [[TheUnwittingComedian Since everything Richard Pryor says elicits uncontrolled laughter to those around him]], any attempts at being serious falls flat.

-->'''Sonic''': They wanted to put me in the beginners' class with the little kids! I can't be swimming around with a bunch of five-year-olds! They can be so cruel when they sense weakness!
-->'''Knuckles''': That's why on the first day, you have to beat up the biggest one in the yard!
-->'''Amy''': [[LampshadeHanging Knuckles, that's prison.]]
-->'''Knuckles''': Only if you let it be!

[[folder: Real Life]]
* Played with in the case of [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Webster_Hubbell Webster "Web" Hubbell]], a friend of President Bill Clinton. He got convicted of over-billing clients and was sent to prison. He told a reporter that the first day the prison was crowded so he was kept in solitary (aka "the Hole") because the guards didn't have a cell for him at the time. As soon as one opened they put him in general population. Hubbell said that another prisoner asked what cell block he came from, he pointed to the solitary confinement wing. Hubbell said that the inmate's eyes went wide and the story spread across the prison. He says that he never had a problem with the other inmates after that (being 6 feet tall also helped him).

* Played with in the case of [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Webster_Hubbell Webster "Web" Hubbell]] was a friend of President Bill Clinton. He got convicted of over-billing clients and was sent to prison. He told a reporter that the first day the prison was crowded so he was kept in solitary (aka "the Hole") because the guards didn't have a cell for him at the time. As soon as one opened they put him in general population. Hubbell said that another prisoner asked what cell block he came from, he pointed to the solitary confinement wing. Hubbell said that the inmate's eyes went wide and the story spread across the prison. He says that he never had a problem with the other inmates after that (being 6 feet tall also helped him).

* In ''Film/Deadpool2'', both Deadpool and Russell Collins wind up in the [[PunishmentBox Ice-Box]], a HellholePrison designed to [[ExtranormalPrison imprison dangerous mutants]]. Familiar with the trope, Russell stashes a pen in "[[AssShove the old prison wallet]]" with the intent of finding the toughest prisoner there and shanking him with it. When he tries invoking it on Black Tom Cassidy, he gets punched in the face for his trouble.