History Funny / Friday

* Felisha (an inveterate mooch) comes up to Craig and Smokey in her latest attempt to bum something off of them. The following exchange ensues:

* Big Worm, unsatisfied with Smokey's responses, has just threatened to kill both him and Craig if he doesn't either pay him the $200 that he owes him or return the weed that he was fronted by 10pm. Following this, one of the kids gathering at his ice cream truck asks for the food that he paid for.

-->'''Big Worm''': You can't have shit, I'm closed, fatboy.

* Smokey's reasoning that pot is okay to smoke because "God put it there for a reason."

* Big Worm quickly fixing his hat before driving off.

* Craig closing the fridge door to find his father, dressed for work and eating something, standing there before [[HypocriticalHumor launching into a rant about how he always finds Craig in the kitchen eating up all the food.]]

-->'''Jehovah's Witness''': Well, fuck you! Half-dead motherfucker!

* Craig closing the fridge door to find his father, dressed for work and eating something, standing there before launching into a rant about how he always finds Craig in the kitchen eating up all the food.
-->'''Willie''': I wanna eat some of them pig's feet!

* Smokey: "I got {{mind control}} over Deebo. He be like 'Shut the fuck up,' and I be quiet. But when he leave, I be talkin' again."

-->'''Deebo''': Yo' what?!

-->'''Smokey''': Nothin'! Whatchu want!?

-->'''Smokey''': WHAT KINDA SHIT IS THAT!? Most people wanna borrow sugar, even ketchup! You wanna borrow my car!? HELL NO! Git the hell on!

-->'''Smokey''': You need to borrow a job wit'cho broke ass, always tryin' to smoke up somebody's ''shit''. Git the hell on, Felisha.

-->'''Smokey''': Remember it. Write it down, take a picture - I don't give a fuuuck!

-->'''Smokey''': She's a gawt damn pest.

(''Smokey makes a dismissive "go away" hand-waving gesture'')

* One of Craig's neighbors, a midget (played by Tony Cox), runs after a salesman who slept with his wife. And throws bricks at his car. All while Craig cheers him on.

This movie is as close to a live-action cartoon you'll ever get, because the film is LOADED with these.
----

[[AC: Friday]]

** Earlier, he asked nicely. In this scene, after Deepo and Smokey snuck out before Stanley came home, Stanley came out to confront them with Smokey thinking he knows they broke in.
-->"I asked nicely, but now I'm getting really irritated! For the last time, stay off my FREAKING GRASS! PLEASE!!"

* One of Craig's neighbors, a midget (played by Tony Cux), runs after a salesman who slept with his wife. And throws bricks at his car. All while Craig cheers him on.
-->"Goddamn devil!"

[[AC: Next Friday]]
* This movie is as close to a live-action cartoon you'll ever get, because the film is LOADED with these.

[[AC: Friday After Next]]

* The scene where Day-Day informs Elroy of the property tax notice and of his getting fired from Pinky's. Elroy's in S&M gear while Suga is bound to something behind him, and he doesn't bother to take off the gag around his mouth as he reads the tax notice. After Day-Day then informs him he got fired, Elroy's response is to hit Day-Day, splash some oil on him, and proceed to beat Day-Day's ass.

-->'''Joker''': ¡QUE! (''turns to glare at Day-Day and Roach'') ¡PINCHE HIJOS DE PUTA, CABRONES! ("WHAT? KILL THESE FUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS!")

-->'''Baby Joker''': (''pointing a gun at Day-Day and Roach'') Falta feria, güey.
-->'''Joker''': ¡QUE! (''turns to glare at Day-Day and Roach'') ¡PINCHE HIJOS DE PUTA, CABRONES!

* When Joker carries a girl over his shoulder upstairs and finds his bedroom door locked, he starts freaking out and gives a short but funny rant.

* The Jokers engaging in GratuitousSpanish before telling Day-Day: "We're sayin' YOU'RE FUCKED, ESE!"

-->'''Willie''': You didn't call the sandwich joint?

** Day-Day's answer to Joker's "Da fuck do you want?"

*** It's also a CallBack to the first movie.

* Stanley, the Joneses' next door neighbor, telling Craig, Smokey, and Deebo to stay off his grass before turning to walk away, only to end up tripping over his lawn chair.

-->'''Jehovah's Witness''': Well, fuck you!

* The fact that Craig got fired from his job on his day off.

* "YOU GOT KNOCKED DA FUCK OUT!"

* Craig grabs some milk from the fridge, only to then find there's hardly anything in the carton.
** "You better put some water on that damn shit!"

* Smokey: "I got mind control over Deebo. He be like 'Shut the fuck up,' and I be quiet. But when he leave, I be talkin' again."

* Deebo and Tyrone fleeing from prison. In broad daylight. While STILL wearing their prison jumpsuits. And absolutely NO ONE around them seems to notice.
* Deebo and Tyrone come to a stop next to a bicyclist at a train crossing. As a train rolls by, we hear the sounds of Deebo beating the shit out of the poor guy so he can steal his bike.
** And after that, he forces Tyrone to keep jogging beside him.

* Willie then loses his footing and ends up falling in dog crap, setting up a recurring joke throughout the movie.
* Tyrone using a brick to try and break the chain keeping him and Deebo attached to one another, and wondering if it's the same brick Craig used to knock Deebo out with in the first movie.
* Deebo and Tyrone block Willie and Craig as they drive out of the neighborhood. Craig tells his dad to "Punch it!" and Willie drives, causing Tyrone to end up on the hood of his truck.

* Elroy pushing Day-Day out the way as he comes to greet Craig. He does it again after Day-Day agrees he would've shot Deebo rather than run from him.

* Willie coming out a public bathroom in a restaurant and announcing he feels five pounds lighter. The other patrons cover their noses in disgust, to which he replies "What? Jealous?"

* Deebo gets Tyrone to make a phony phone call to Willie telling him Craig's in trouble, and he slaps Tyrone whenever Tyrone says something foolish. After Tyrone makes the call, he has this to say to Deebo:

* Craig is jogging back over to Elroy's house, unaware Cheeco is running over to him. After turning to see Cheeco, he utters "Oh, shit!" and breaks into a full run across the street.
** Craig and Day-Day then climb onto the roof of Day-Day's BMW as Cheeco surrounds them. Day-Day yells for Joker to call his dog, then orders Craig to get off his car.

** The exchange after the worker wonders if Craig's a basketball player.

*** Then he ends up getting chased by Cheeco.

* Day-Day fleeing from the store, and Baby D giving chase, all the while D'Wana shouts for Baby D to kick Day-Day's ass.
* Day-Day being chased around by Baby D in the parking lot, and Craig, Roach, and D'Wana just standing there and watching.

* Day-Day offers to set Baby D up with Craig in exchange for going free. But when he goes over to Craig and tells him what happened, Craig gives him a DisapprovingLook, takes one look at Baby D, and [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere hauls ass back into the store ("I'm gone!")]].

* The lead-up to the fight between Craig and Pinky, in which Pinky holds Craig at gunpoint and interrogates him, but keeps yelling "SHUT UP!" each time Craig tries to answer. At one point, he even throws a childish tantrum. Craig's annoyed expression is a funny thing to watch.

** Craig gets his hands on Pinky's gun and points it at him, and Pinky is gradually reduced to a blubbering mess of a man as he pleads for his life.
** After Day-Day and Roach come out from the back, and Day-Day confirms that Craig's his cousin, Pinky snaps back into {{Jerkass}} mode and fires BOTH him and Roach.
** Day-Day calling Pinky "Bobby Womack," and Pinky going "I heard that shit! Say it again, say it again!"
** After the three guys leave the store, Pinky puts up a brave face, but then says to himself that he nearly shit himself but held his own, "so fuck that."

* "Take me to Judge Judy, puto!"

** Roach then starts loudly banging his foot against the door until Day-Day forces him to stop, saying the Jokers are going to think they're the police, and Roach tells him "it gets results." [[DumbassHasAPoint Cue the Joker brothers opening the door and training their guns on Day-Day and Roach.]]

--->'''Day-Day''': We came to borrow some sugar.

* Day-Day and Roach singing Whodini's "Friends" while they're getting tied up. That is, until Joker [[BigShutUp yells at them to "SHUT! DA FUCK! UP!"]]

* Elroy tackles Lil' Joker when he comes out to check on Baby Joker, only to end up hurting his back.

** Then Craig walks up behind Joker, gets his attention, and decks him.

* Deebo's VillainousRescue. He pops up behind Joker as the latter prepares to shoot Craig and punches him on the head whilst saying "WHAM!", sending Joker falling to the ground.

-->'''Willie''': You still got yo' illegal cable?

* Craig goes into Elroy and Suga's bedroom, where he finds all sorts of BDSM equipment before heading over to the bed where Elroy and Suga are asleep. He tries to stir Elroy, only for Elroy to fart. Craig again tries to wake his uncle, only for Elroy to grab him, pull him down onto the bed, thinking he's Suga or something. Suga then ends up fondling Craig, who finally gets free and ends up brushing against a piece of BDSM equipment before finally getting out of the room.

* "You better put some water on that damn shit!"

* Deebo and Tyrone fleeing from prison. In broad daylight. While STILL wearing their prison jumpsuits. And absolutely NO ONE seems to notice.

* Willie loses his footing and ends up falling in dog crap, leading to a number of {{running gag}}s throughout the movie.

* Deebo and Tyrone block Willie and Craig as they drive out of the neighborhood. Craig tells his dad to "Punch it!" and Willie drives, causing Tyrone to end up on the roof of his truck.
* After Craig and Willie drive off, Tyrone tells Deebo he's going to his mother's house and tries to walk off, only for an angry Deebo to grab him and drag him off with him.
* Craig wonders what smells so awful in the truck, and Willie replies "Must be your upper lip, son, 'cause I don't smell nothin'."
** Willie sprays some air freshener, and Craig tries to roll down his window, only for Willie to tell him it's broken. All Craig can do is say "Oh, damn!" and continue jiggling the handle.
* Day-Day greets Craig warmly, but puts on a dour expression when he turns to Willie and greets him with an unenthused "Hi, Uncle Willie."
* Elroy pushing Day-Day out the way as he comes to greet Craig. He does it again after Day-Day agrees he would've shot Deebo rather than run.
* Elroy asking Willie "still steppin' in that dog shit everyday?"
* Willie tells Elroy not to slam his car door. Elroy just slams it anyway.

* Elroy remarking he and Suga get real nasty in the Jacuzzi...right before he spots a condom floating in said Jacuzzi.
* Deebo brings his stolen bike to an abrupt halt, causing Tyrone (who's riding on the handlebars) to fall off.
* Willie coming out a public bathroom in a restaurant and announcing he feels five pounds lighter. The other patrons cover their noses in disgust, to which he replies "What? Jealous"

* Willie taking a whole bottle of hot sauce after a restaurant employee tells him "Get the fuck outta here!"

** Once Cheeco is gone, Day-Day gets off his car roof and orders Craig down. Craig, however, ends up falling on his ass on the roof. Day-Day is not pleased.

** The worker wonders if Craig's a basketball player. Craig's response? "I play for the Cucamonga Cracker Killers. You want tickets?"
** "Hey, I don't want any trouble. You don't have to send your posse out here to do a 187 in my ass!"
** The postal worker then starts singing the ''Series/GoodTimes'' theme song as he heads off.
** Then he ends up getting chased by Cheeco.

--->'''Angry African Customer''': Try again, motherfucka!

--->'''Angry African Customer''': Try again, motherfucka!

--->'''Angry African Customer''': I'll go postal on this motherfucka!

* Day-Day: "All I want, Santa Claus, is two fat bitches and a bag of weed... and two bags of chips to give t-t-t-to the fat bitches."
* Craig getting his ass handed to him by Ghetto Santa who, at one point in the fight, beats Craig with the Christmas tree. And no, not a miniature one; a ''large'' one.

* Craig and Day-Day's reaction after Miss Pearly threatens to sic her convicted criminal son Damon on them if they don't have the rent money by the end of the day.

** This is followed by Day-Day attempting to get out the car, only to be held back by the seat belt he still has on.

* Day-Day power-tripping as a security guard.

* Craig getting his ass handed to him by Ghetto Santa who, at one point in the fight, beats Craig with the Christmas tree.
* Day-Day tripping and falling after learning Ghetto Santa stole the rent money.
* Craig and Day-Day trying to B.S. their way out of trouble after the polices find marijuana in their apartment and decide to confiscate it.

* Smokey: "I got mind control over Deebo. He be like 'Shut the fuck up', and I be quiet. But when he leave, I be talkin' again."

* "TRY AGAIN, MOTHERFUCKA!!!"

* "You better put some water on that damn shit!"