Line #48 Funny/FalloutEquestriaProjectHorizons


1	* Glory's poor grasp of sarcasm and snark.
2	-->'''Blackjack:''' [[ProperlyParanoid As soon as I go into this [memory orb] we’ll be stormed by bounty hunters, ghouls, and Deus.]] But I’m bored and I’m curious, so I’ll need you two to protect me from Deus raping me with his cannon.
3	-->'''Glory:''' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint I really don’t think it’d fit.]] That bore has to be a hundred and twenty two millimeters and that’s almost the width of a mare giving birth so figuring in the thickness of the barrel…[[ShuttingUpNow Oh. Blackjack humor. Sorry.]]
4	* Blackjack reacts to being told that she's been exposed to taint.
5	--> '''Blackjack:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck So, am I going to]] [[NaughtyTentacles grow tentacles?]] [[EyeScream A third eye?]] [[GenderBender A penis?]] [[BreadEggsBreadedEggs Eye tentacle penises?]]
6	* This exchange, from chapter 16:
7	-->'''Deus:''' “Gonna give me a blow job?”\
8	'''Blackjack:''' ''Magic Missile GroinAttack''\
9	'''Deus:''' ''VillainousBreakdown''
10	* Recovering from a hangover in Chapter 17, Blackjack is offered a HideousHangOverCure. She downs three, and even develops a liking for the taste. Rampage - the [[HealingFactor immortal]], [[ImmuneToDrugs drug-immune]] reaper - tries one and promptly vomits. [[VomitIndiscretionShot All over P-21.]]
11	* Shortly after Lacunae is introduced, Blackjack announces that she has something to say - and immediately has to reassure her friends that she is ''not'' pregnant, drunk or high.
12	* Any discussion of Blackjack's 'compact' horn, [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything and her envy of Lacunae's larger one.]]
13	* Blackjack and co. need spark batteries to buy passage on a boat. The only trader nearby is [[JerkWithAHeartOfGold Charity]], and Blackjack is broke. Cue PuppyEyes and whining.
14	* Blackjack's ridiculous mental image of the [[Fanfic/FalloutEquestria Stable Dweller.]]
15	--> '''Blackjack:''' “I like to imagine her as some big, tough, take-no-shit kind of mare. [...] Big and tough and strong and doesn’t let anything cross her. She probably dual wields miniguns with missile launchers strapped to them. She’s probably got some kind of power armor too. Like magical super heavy plate that blasts lightning from her horn. And flies!"
16	* Scotch Tape tries [[LethalChef Glory's]] cooking.
17	-->[[TemptingFate “Oh, come on. It can’t be that bad.]] I’ve had poo water in my mouth,” Scotch said with a snort at the other two as I stepped out. There was a loud gulp and then, a second later, a thud.
18	* [[CuteButCacophonic “Crusaders collection agents!”]]
19	* Finding out that Princess Luna's first Grand Galloping Gala as ruler was organised by ''Pinkie Pie''.
20	* [[ItMakesSenseInContext "Rubber hoof brigade, coming through. Wooga wooga wooga!"]]
21	* Blackjack and co. take cover from a fierce storm, and she uses a memory orb to pass the time. The memory, unexpectedly, is of a vigorous sexual encounter between Rarity and Vanity. BJ returns to her body to find all her friends staring at her. [[JizzedInMyPants For some reason]].
22	* As dark and depressing as this scene is overall, [[MoodWhiplash this line towards the end of the infamous chapter 33 might garner a chuckle or two.]]
23	-->'''Blackjack:''' If you say sorry one more time, [[ToiletHumour I will soil myself right here and now. And it will be nasty, I mean it! Poop so nasty, it'll sing and tap dance!]]
24	* Chapter 34: again, Blackjack gets hammered drunk, and again she manages to intimidate a group of winged ponies into giving her a piggyback ride. Only this time it's the alicorns instead of the Enclave, [[Fanfic/FalloutEquestria Littlepip]] is along for the ride, she's wearing a crown made of taped-together whiskey bottles, and she manages to exasperate the Goddess to the point of a mental breakdown.
25	** Illustrated [[http://ponibooru.413chan.net/post/view/124464 here.]]
26	* Chapter 48 has this gem from Rampage:
27	-->" Welcome to the Blackjack and Co. Travelling Freak Show. Remember to shoot Blackjack. It's good luck."
28	* Glory's bait-and-switch at the end of chapter 49. She tricks Blackjack into thinking that they're about to have sex...then proceeds to beat the ever-loving crap out of her over her infidelity.
29	* Stygius's sister finding the group after they get out of Hightower. Not only does she switch from batpony echolocation to Royal Canterlot Voice, she also calls Blackjack ''a strumpet.''
30	* Chapter 55. After a heated argument between P-21 and Glory, Rampage helpfully intervenes and advises that they "shut up and fuck already".
31	--->'''P-21:'''"With HER?!"
32	--->'''Glory:'''"With HIM?!"
33	--->'''Both in unison:'''"GROSS!!"
34	** Take one guess, [[GilliganCut what happens]] after they both get royally plastered at the Grand Galloping Gala a few chapters later.
35	* Another from Chapter 55, Scotch and Boo have a food fight in the middle of the Society's kitchens. And right next to Glory as she dissects several cybernetic zebra corpses.
36	* Also, from Chapter 55, it takes barely a few hours for someone to try to assassinate Blackjack, after she's made the Queen of the Society. She gives the potential assassin scorn for trying to do it with a ''knife'', then, just to make a point, [[ExtremeOmnivore eats the knife.]]
37	* In Chapter 62, Blackjack uses EC-1101 to remotely shut down the Core's [{{Wave Motion Gun}}s. The readout:
38	--> > Emergency shutdown SUB 8, SUB 10, SUB 12, SUB 13, SUB 19, SUB 20.\
39	>Password: [[ThisIsGoingToSuck Thisisgonnahurt]]\
40	>Confirm Emergency Shutdown Y/N?  Emergency shutdown of power grid during power draw not recommended.\
41	>Y\
42	>Are you absolutely, positively sure? \
43	>Y\
44	> [[RuleOfThree Execute: Y/N?]]
45	* In the second half of 62, General Storm Chaser hears that Blackjack approves of Rampage's plan to hijack an enemy [[CoolAirship Raptor]] and [[RammingAlwaysWorks crash]] it somewhere.
46	--> '''Storm Chaser''': 'Go to the surface,' he said. 'They're [[RockBeatsLaser savage primitives]],' he said. '[[TemptingFate What could they ''possibly'' throw at us?]]' Harbinger, you idiot.
47	* In chapter 69, to prove her status as the real Blackjack returned in a Blank clone-body, Blackjack lets Dr. Triage pour raw Flux/Taint all over her head. When this fails to be totally convincing, Blackjack snatches the bottle from Triage and ''chugs it''. Even Triage scrambles for cover, but all that happens is Blackjack belching a cloud of rainbow colored fumes that transforms some nearby unicorn statues into, quote, "crude and uncouth depictions of Discord". Blackjack mentally describes the texture as "seminal", the scent as an overpowering mixture of benzene and cotton candy, and the flavor as hovering somewhere among wallpaper paste, rust, and raw radroach. She verbally proclaims it "pretty good".
48	** [[MoodWhiplash And then a skeptic decides to prove she's a fake by drinking the remnants himself.]] [[NightmareFuel/FalloutEquestriaProjectHorizons The results are far less amusing.]]
49	* Chapter 70: Even while the Hoof is preparing for the storm of its biggest war, and the Highlanders are turtling up, Scotch Tape manages to [[HateAtFirstSight find her life-long nemethingy.]]
50	** For the icing on the cake, Glory finds this idea completely baffling, whilst the other ponies all treat it as just a natural part of growing up.
51	* In chapter 74, amidst a debate about the morality of stopping Project Horizons, Discord mentions that the exchange is largely taking place in Blackjack's mind, and decides to use the opportunity to sneak a peak into Blackjack's subconscious. [[AMindIsATerribleThingToRead Which he immediately regrets.]]

Context Funny / FalloutEquestriaProjectHorizons