The super quick 2 x 5 question character critique chain thread

I thought this might be a good alternative to the longer questions threads or the more in depth critique threads. The idea's to get quick feedback on you ideas for a given character (or just see if a minor character fulfils their purpose).

Rules

1. You will be answering five questions (noted below) about your character. First in a descriptive manner, then "in character".
2. Before posting your own character, you must critique the poster above's (just say if you liked them or not and give a reason if you're stuck).
3. Limit all answers to a single paragraph or less (but avoid single word answers if you can).

The questions are;

• Who? - What's your character's name? Where do they come from? In short, give them a quick biography.
• What? - So, what is your character's role in the story? Are they an antagonist? Protagonist? Deuteragonist? Easily killed mook #2321? Just answer this with a link to a trope, if you like.
• Where? - Where are they when they show up in the story?
• Why? - What is their motive for what they're doing?
• How? - By what means are they going to be achieving the "Why" in the "Where"?

Here's a template to copy & paste into your post;

---

Now, without further ado, I'll start things off with an NPC from my game project;

"The" Smith

Answers:

• Who? - Smith is only known by his nickname (although it also happens to be his surname). He's a middle aged man who works as an engineer (and tends to work as a teacher in between jobs).
• What? - He mostly serves as a "shopkeeper" in gameplay terms. In story, he's the main character's mentor (Since Adam Smith Hates Your Guts, the players will also have the option of making him a Butt-Monkey).
• Where? - He appears in the tutorial (as a teacher) and serves as the "consultant" (basically a merchant NPC) in the game proper.
• Why? - His main interest is to make money, but he's happy to mentor the main character and her classmates as well (as long as he's retired before they go into business).
• How? - He mostly achieves this by teaching students and taking the best ones along to his "archaeological digs" (or "plundering ruins" as some might call it). In gameplay terms, he gives hints on how best to use items the player finds and serves as a merchant who can sell what they find (or trade them for more useful parts and items).

In Character Answers:

• Who? - Just call me Smith (because I'm a Smith who smiths! Haha). I guess I just help people build things, tell people how to build things and help them sell them (and only only even charge for the last one!).
• What? - Well, I like to think I'm a cog in the machine of society. A well oiled cog. Who gets paid per revolution.
• Where? - Well, you can find me in my workshop, in the field (it's the tent with the sign on it, next to the bunks). If I happen to be working as a teacher, you can find me in my classroom for up to an hour after the bell rings (then I'm off the clock!).
• Why? - A man's got to eat, although I like to think I'm giving a little back by passing on my trade while I'm at it.
• How? - It's pretty simple; I teach kids how to dot all the t's and cross all the i's of machining. At the end of the academic year I take any graduates from previous years^note Can't take 'em when they're fresh out of school you see; they need to be old enough to apply for a salvage license. who have potential down to the old 22nd century ruins and have them throw all that textbook nonsense out of the window. They dig me up enough artefacts to make it worth all our whiles...and get themselves some valuable field experience in the process.

edited 14th Sep '13 6:46:46 PM by Bisected8

TV Tropes's No. 1 bread themed lesbian. she/her, fae/faer

Seems like a pretty good shopkeeper with personality (unlike so many NPC shopkeepers out there who say few repeated lines). And also a tutorial guy.

This here is the protagonist of my game project^note that's in perpetual Development Hell.

(Terminology)

• Meta: Extradimensional Energy Beings that have varying degrees of control over the laws of physics.
• Resistance: The faction of Metas fight against the Enforcers and Defiance.
• Enforcers: This faction of Metas plans to unite multiverses into a single government controlled by them.
• Defiance: This faction of Metas plans to destroy all sentient life within the multiverses.
• (Note: Enforcers and Defiance hate each other more than they hate the Resistance)

I.C.

Answers:

• Who? I.C. is known by his initials. He is a Resistance Meta that works as an infiltrator and information stealer.
• What? The "protagonist" of the story. He steals weapon information from enemy Metas and can recreate said stolen weaponry.
• Where? He appears in the story working under the Enforcers at first, but is actually an infiltrator/spy. Later on, he attacks key Enforcer and Defiance locations.
• Why? I.C. really dislikes the strict Order imposed by the Enforcers, and hates the wanton destruction that the Defiance cause.
• How? By beating/touching/scanning foes, I.C. can steal weapon data and recreate said weapons. He's usually sent in to infiltrate important locations, get weapon data, and bring those locations down.

In-Character Answers:

• Who? ...I.C., the Resistance's Info Stealer and Weapons Dealer.
• What? Well, I'm not one of the big guns in this war, but still a key player. Just here to help out the Resistance, and show the enemies what it's like to be destroyed by their own weapons.
• Where? I'm usually off on some special missions to infiltrate and destroy targets. If I'm at base, I'll probably be giving out mass copies of the stuff I stole.
• Why? The Resistance needs every bit of information and firepower to destroy the Enforcers and Defiance. The Enforcers are up to no good, unlike what most believe. Their unified government is nothing but a cover up operation to harvest sentient life. While I'm not above killing, I only kill those who deserve it. The Defiance kill everything, including innocents, and that I cannot stand.
• How? Resistance sends me into (Key Enemy Location XXX). I scan the defenses there, get their weapons, destroy them and blow the place up. One less base for the enemy, much better firepower for the Resistance.

edited 15th Sep '13 3:59:29 AM by ironcommando

...eheh