Single Tropers Club

Of course not.

But if that mentality is all you can reflect on online posts, it is hypothesizing at best, but at least there is evidence that one can suspect these thoughts manifest in behaviors that would seem to be not the most adequate for the objective that is purported to be desired.

By that logic, everyone who posts in the "Insecurity, Sadness, Anxiety, and such matters II" is a mess in public. You can't really draw strong conclusions from such a small sample as posts in a thread dedicated to people being sad about being single.

Except I did not say all behaviors.

Simply enough in amount to be offputting.

Eh, like I said, don't think you can generalize from someone making a post in a thread specifically dedicated to that purpose.

I agree. You cannot generalize anything even from what people tell you directly.

But one can analyze behaviors and what thoughts may spur them to quell, or at least diminish, negative emotions, and in this case, I am simply working with the specific sentences wrought about here.

The examples I used were not those of his, but fabricated ones.

That's suggesting that I wear my issues as a mask, when, in fact, I wear a smile as a mask. I am mopey; this is true. That's not all that I ever put into threads like these, though. I just thought that I could be more open, here. I wasn't even wearing it on my sleeve; I just typed a sentence. I guess that I'll just keep suppressing my emotions. It makes no difference, either way.

In public, I can be very charismatic, and I can appear like I'm not suffering from anything. Nonetheless, I want someone who can make my smiles real. I want to feel like I actually exist.

Yeah, my very first sentence was the exact opposite of suggesting you to mask yourself or supress emotions.

My first sentence was a suggestion about looking for psychological or psychiatric help. And I repeat it.

Odd1 - wait a few years, and present yourself differently.

Seriously, part of it is about presentation here.

I have that, but "help" is the operative word. I might just get rid of my therapist.

edited 3rd Dec '14 10:59:01 AM by SpaceWolf

In Russia, smiling without a reason is seen as deceptive.

Find another one who suits you better if you do not feel you are doing progress. Good therapists ought to give you reachable objectives for you to attain and such.

I can give you a source to find some. You can give them a phone call, see prices and whatnot of those nearby.

I feel like I generally present myself rather well IRL, thank you.

Still here, but that's just one of my problems.

I guess in order to get a relationship, you need friends first.....

Not you. Space Wolf.

I have friends. They aren't that helpful. -_-

Eh. I do have some real close friends, but they all live far away.

It doesn't help that the person i have romantic interest in at the moment happens to be my best friend.

Actually, Aszur, he was responding to Rachel.

edited 4th Dec '14 9:56:54 AM by SpaceWolf

Right you are, my bad

I'm going to pass on your offer, by the way. University therapy is essentially free. If I honestly feel like it, I can just choose a different person. I don't think that that's the problem, though. It's not the therapist; it's the therapy. I have realized that this is so ingrained in me, that it cannot be easily solved. I don't have the same mood disorder that you probably think that I do. For me, it doesn't end.

You seem like you're trying to help, but I have been through all of this. Also, I am adept at pretending to have joy. I know that it's not necessarily healthy for a relationship, but it's what I can do. If I find a nice girl, and we date, I can make her think that I'm okay (for a while). I just don't know if I can find a girl.

I went to school-provided therapy over my romantic situation once. The therapist quickly turned it toward a more general social loneliness.

Different people use different therapies.

I am not so arrogant as to say I can even suspect of something as serious as a disorder. Therapy is often more about giving a new perspective, a different point of view, and many times, that is all we need. Diagnosing an actual mood disorder is far more difficult than can be gauged in online posts.

All I can tell is that you seem like you could use some other person right in front of ya who is trained to analyze your situation more thoroughly than I, or anyone here, ever could from the distance.

He did give me two very good pieces of wisdom. He compared the way I fixate on a crush that pays attention to me when I don't have many friends to being parched in the desert and finding a single drop of water. And he helped me realize that rather than waiting to find out how others expect to interact with me, I should play the role I want to play with them before they assign me one (because my tendency of waiting means they usually file me under "dull wallflower").

I do, in fact, have a mood disorder. It was diagnosed in September. It's not major depressive disorder; it's one of its cousins. Anyway, I'm seeing my therapist, today. I might talk to her about switching to a new person, but I'm not sure.

edited 4th Dec '14 10:19:26 AM by SpaceWolf

Yup

abandon all hope

ye who enter here