The Absolute Madman
Just stand there. MENACINGLY!
"We be we baby!"
RUN AROUND SUPER FAST
EJECT GOLDEN RINGS WHENEVER KICKED
SCREAM GIBBERISH!
Plus, if you get enough accessories, he turns into a DBZ ripoff!
BUY NOW!
Professional Professionalist
THE NEW KIRBY ACTION FIGURE DELUXE!
WOW!
HE INFLATES HIMSELF! HE EVEN INHALES SURROUNDING OBJECTS! WOW!
"Don't cry because it's over, cry because it happened."
The Absolute Madman
He just stares at you and watches you while you sleep.
"We be we baby!"
The Best Worst Psychonaut
Watch in AWE as your SONIC THE HEDGEHOG action figure crashes into your wall at great speed! WITNESS it STEAL ALL OF YOUR VALUABLE JEWELLRY! GASP as it gives CORNY QUIPS! Please do not place anywhere in, next to, or above any body of water. This action figure cannot swim.
![[down]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_down.png "[down]"){kind=icon}
That's not his name; Oates is the character's he's referring to. :V
edited 24th Jan '17 10:41:17 AM by PresidentStalkeyes
"If you think like a child, you will do a child's work."
The Absolute Madman
DETECTIVE OATES ACTION FIGURE!!
Use OATES' Taser gun to wrongfully shoot down black bears and arrests them for no real reason.
"We be we baby!"
Professional Professionalist
It's just an ordinary motionless figure; doesn't do anything. But it does get stared at by a heavy-breathing weeb.
edited 21st Apr '17 9:00:19 AM by arimothereindeer
"Don't cry because it's over, cry because it happened."
The Bakabon one quotes his dad's signature catchphrase. Also looks pretty cool.
The Osomatsu one comes with his ultra-dating-sim-esque outfit from the first ep.
The Superstar of the Supernatural World! (debatable)
Kicks a football?
plant
Uh...realistic nun praying action?
" I'm the princess! Everyone has to do what I say!"
Asgore Adopts Noelle
They're like lego's, you can mix and mash them up together. The big one also has an arm cannon that shoots little plastic balls.
Blitzy....
It's already a toy, so not much....
Just made a server on discord.Come join me.
Not stupid or expendable.
.....Some things are better off unanswered.
"My light shall be the moon, and my path the ocean, my guide the morning star as I sail home to you...."
(ON INDEFINITE HIATUS)
He sings if you push a button on the figure
She/they. Hirrus Clutumnus is my comfort character
chaos catby with a flannel shirt addiction
his hat squeaks if you press on it
I used to plug my deviantart here but turns out the link was too long.
Professional Professionalist
Plays weeaboo meme songs like Caramelldansen and Pafu Pafu Nyan Nyan, and for some reason, I don't doubt it has full articulation.
"Don't cry because it's over, cry because it happened."
Just a Mettaur
It bites your finger.
A great Mascot Mook.
Not stupid or expendable.
His arms, legs, and head move, his hoodie comes off, and comes with the stuff and instructions you need to make bacon soap. 
Hydraloonie
It can play music.
Progress has it's stepping stones.
Flawless Victree
What else? It can glide.
"Okay, yeah, I guess Ollie fits the goofy sidekick role, but being a princess doesn't mean I spontaneously sing about everything, 'kay?"
Repeat a single syllable a lot.