Is it bad that I saw that coming from a mile away?
what do you mean I didn't win, I ate more wet t-shirts than anyone else
I know a joke about premature ejaculation...
... but you'll see it coming.
Bo "Jangles" Wyatt
"Officer, I'm not stalking this girl. I'm following her around town and to her house, to make sure there aren't any weirdos waiting for her."
In the backyard, buried deep underneath the tree There's a monster, takin' root in the property...
Trans Siberian Anarchestra (it/they)
![[up]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_up.png "[up]"){kind=icon}
Well, you know what they say. The first step is to admit you have a problem. The second step is to kidnap them.
![[lol]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/lol2v12_4863.png "[lol]"){kind=small}
Am I a weirdo?
Captain Picard was sitting on the bridge of the Enterprise eating Vietnamese soup when Q showed up and started making conversation. He asked, "What's that you're eating?" Picard, of course replied, "It's pho, Q."
And thus Q's devious plan to get Picard fined by the FCC was complete.
Bigotry will NEVER be welcome on TV Tropes.
Bo "Jangles" Wyatt
Does the B in Benoît B. Mandelbrot stand for Benoît B. Mandelbrot?
In the backyard, buried deep underneath the tree There's a monster, takin' root in the property...
I don't get it.
Spooky Scary Boneheaded Man
I believe it does, actually.
All the way down, in fact.
"The Stick has sentimental value. It's like an enormous, hideous teddy bear we can kill things with." -rikalous
FABRICATI DIEM, PVNC!
Try reading "Pho, Q" aloud a oouple of times.
Bo "Jangles" Wyatt
"I'll just work it out with a pencil," said the mathematician...
...to the proctologist.
edited 26th Jul '14 3:57:05 PM by TheMike
In the backyard, buried deep underneath the tree There's a monster, takin' root in the property...
The filidh that cam frae Skye
What's the difference between Glasgow and Toronto?
One is a sprawling urban wasteland of cheap apartment buildings and rampant petty crimes presided over by a belligerent drug addict, and the other is the largest city in Scotland.
Halper's Law: as the length of an online discussion of minority groups increases, the probability of "SJW" or variations being used = 1.
Spooky Scary Boneheaded Man
The plot thickens!! ![[tup]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/Thumbs_up_emoticon_3268.png "[thumb up]"){kind=small}
edited 29th Jul '14 10:42:35 PM by OmegaShadowcry
"The Stick has sentimental value. It's like an enormous, hideous teddy bear we can kill things with." -rikalous
Am I a weirdo?
So, the other day I was talking to this guy who had a trillion heads of cattle, all of which were male. He was talking about his difficulties in feeding them all, as well as the impossibility of selling them all without crashing the beef market and...
Actually, you know what, I should stop now. After all, everyone can tell that this is just the setup for A tera-bull pun.
Bigotry will NEVER be welcome on TV Tropes.
It's Like Arguing on the Internet
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
Elephino.
Somehow you know that the time is right.
Bo "Jangles" Wyatt
I thought the answer was I haven't a goddamn clue.
Bo "Jangles" Wyatt
Did you hear the one about the jurisprudence fetishist?
He got off on a technicality.
In the backyard, buried deep underneath the tree There's a monster, takin' root in the property...
Handy-Dandy Chord Finder
3 microphones forever
Did you hear the one about the antique miniature fedora?
Never mind, it's a little old hat.
Earth is the only planet inhabitable by Nicolas Cage.
Trans Siberian Anarchestra (it/they)
"We're celebrating our 25th anniversary! We'd have divorced years ago, but neither of us wanted custody of our kids."
The Revolution Will Not Be Tropeable
Bo "Jangles" Wyatt
I once tried to walk uphill without a watch, but I had neither the time nor the inclination.
edited 16th Aug '14 8:15:21 PM by TheMike
In the backyard, buried deep underneath the tree There's a monster, takin' root in the property...
Making Unicorns Cool Again Since 2010
What was Beethoven's favorite fruit?
Banananas! Banananas!
Princess Aurora is underrated, pass it on.
Until further notice
You know, I don't see why we needed to have a Joke thread and a Bad Pun thread if we're just going to fill both with puns. Or maybe I'm just being one of those "Stop Having Pun" Guys.
(
)
edited 16th Aug '14 11:44:01 PM by Pyrite
Not a substitute for a formal medical consultation.
You know what? The pun thread's a real joke. ;P
Two people were walking through the woods, and they come across a set of tracks. One says they're deer tracks, the other says they're elk tracks.
They were still arguing about it when the train hit them.
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.