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Can glooms spawn underground?
If not, they are of no importance. The iron is located below the surface. And as a good dwarf, I refuse to go overground if I can dig.
edited 27th May '12 10:53:03 PM by CountDorku
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
No problems then.
Who watches the watchmen?
Argh. How can I make these idiots stuff haematite in my haematite stockpile? It takes the furnace operator about three weeks to smelt one unit of ore.
Just a minor note: Those are not lakes, but inlets connected to two different oceans.If we can somehow get them to stay thawed for extended periods, there is a chance that we can add killer whales or even sea serpents to our resources.
<><
An Ex-Troper
Ooh. Those thousands of urists should help move some magma up once we start digging, and it is easy enough to run some heating from there.
Not nearly a good enough singer for the Choir Invisible, and the Basement Room With A Synth Invisible is much less prestigious.
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
On the hauling jobs. Make sure your ore stockpile has some wheel barrows and don't smelt any ore until the stock pile is well, stocked. Sometimes the dwarves are slow on the bounce to do their hauling. Especially if you have a lot of other hauling tasks.
Who watches the watchmen?
An Ex-Troper
You can set your furnace to only take from your ore stockpile (just pick "give to a workshop" from the stockpile's options), which stops the furnace operator from going off and lugging it down himself.
Not nearly a good enough singer for the Choir Invisible, and the Basement Room With A Synth Invisible is much less prestigious.
I managed to get them to start hauling by building some more wheelbarrows.
Latest After-Action Report:
Granite
Merry Dwarfmas everyone! It is now the year 255. Know what this means, everyone? If so, please krutzing tell me.
I delivered my annual State of the Underground address. Then the cat looked at me oddly and spat out a hairball. A shame that I was unable to claim my true destiny! While the hold of which I am the rightful heir is gone, I could have led this place into triumph! Instead, I’m stuck here dragging a wheelbarrow and steering events through office politics, an elaborate system of weights, and being the only guy here badass enough to claim the title “maniac”.
The iron vein is richer than I dared hope, although given the amount of cheese I eat before bedtime not that much richer. We might actually have – gasp – decent equipment soon. Tuefel, who’s taken care of most of it, has definitely earned his pay, or at least would have earned his pay if we paid him. Sadly, it is a) not infinite, and b) waaaay too far away to be comfortable. On the other hand, slow iron trumps the everliving krutz out of no iron, which was what we had, so…yay, I guess.
Every time someone spots the blood-red mist descending over the fort, I’m compelled to wonder why we picked this hellhole. Invariably, I conclude that it’s because of the fallen, demon-tainted ducks who control our leaders, but despite the whims of the graceful wicked mallards we shall prevail! The heroic ducks who provide us with eggs will triumph over their dark kin!
Incidentally, so that we can breed turkeys, I’ve set up what I call the Breeding Room. It’s a 2x3 alcove with a lockable door and some nest boxes off the side of the main hall; I’m shoving the turkey hen in there and locking the door, so that the turkey eggs can hatch. We should be able to survive on chicken, peahen and duck eggs.
Slate
Our first piece of iron armour has rolled off the forges! Also, I’ve set up a small alcove to grow above-ground plants – in a pretty krutzing airtight zone, it has to be said. And I’ve split our finished goods stockpiles between ‘useful stuff’ (clothes, splints, and the like) and ‘vendor trash’ (mugs, crafts and whatnot). If I leave no other mark here, let it be that I added strawberry wine to our alcohol reserves. I’ll try and find another location to fortify and turn into a farming outpost; the ridiculously thick forest makes this difficult, however. (This further proves Vabok’s Theorem, i.e. “The trees are attacking! Run for your lives!”)
Our population has climbed to a ridiculous 246. I keep asking if we could spare one for me to use as a drop-trap tester, but sadly none have come forward yet.
I’m building an expansion to our central aboveground block, to allow us to do more farming. It involves pointlessly exposing a lot of dwarves to the risk of deathmist, but what the krutz, who gives a crap if they live or die? They’re not me! (I used our sole block of pitchblende, in the hope of getting mutant supercrops. You never know.)
I’ve just been informed that we now know a thing or two about taming grey langurs. Did you know grey langurs are powered by spite and stolen jewellery, and overexposure will lead to much punching of camels?
Oh look. Thikut Astes has gone hunting and brought back…um…a giant louse. I can’t wait to see what it tastes like. Another hunter has produced a grasshopper as large as he is. I hate this place.
Felsite
A gloom and some elves came simultaneously. I suspect a connection. Oh, also the red mist came down. And then I was stung by a honeybee. And then I made a really good barrel! Note to self: must !!experiment!! with honeybee venom. While of course my genius needs no enhancement, the chance of producing decent stuff with armourers must be investigated.
Also, elves take forever to unload. Bastards. Still, we were able to get some good stuff off them, including females of the bear and wolf variety. If we can get a male, then we can begin breeding for beasts.
The Entrance Secundus defences are being placed. So far I’m working on front and back atomsmashers and a pair of Projected Assailant Repulsion Technology with Inherent Crushing Legionary Engine, Automated Cruelty Calibrator, Extended Levitation Eliminator, and Rapid Attacker Termination Optimised Rocks and Spikes, or PARTICLE ACCELERATORS – a pair of long falls onto spikes. I’ll whip up some pearlash…eventually…and gather some sand and begin making glass serrated discs to give goblins taking the direct route a reason to wish they hadn’t.
And then I’m going to get really mean.
Hematite
Spent most of the last month assigning new military. One squad with copper armour will get us murdered if we encounter anything more unpleasant than a stiff breeze. Memories of the kobold slaughter of Fishsicles’ reign are hard to repress, even for a nutjob like me. Anyway, we now have two-man sword, hammer, mace, axe and spear squads, plus a very numerous mob of nutcases with crossbows. The Bad Pennies are OK for a suicide squad, but for actual killing, you can’t go past our new forces – the Merry Maniacs, the Axe Murderers, the Swordsketeers, the Pointy Sticks, the Hammers of Cool and the Aces of Clubs…or at least you won’t be able to, when they’ve actually got equipment.
Also, when the latest evil gloom rolls past, I’m going to set up a Hermetic Seal Lever. This will enable me to slam all the exterior bridges simultaneously. (I don’t know why it is that evil glooms = birth of deranged psychopaths. Well, apart from the way any weather = birth of deranged psychopaths. I should know.)
Plus, I’m expanding the farms. We need more dammit!
Our war dog pupulation (sorry) is climbing rapidly. Without any smoothing to do, my idiots can focus on training them. This proved very useful when a half-tame grey langur that was nearby decided it wanted to go back to the wild and got torn apart in about a minute.
Crap. Turns out one of the children didn’t get inside in time. I’m expecting some serious fallout from this, and not just because I’m still hoping for more pitchblende.
So we don’t run out of iron, I’m sending the diggers to do some resource exploration under the last vein.
My continuing efforts to domesticate grey langurs are proving ineffectual. Possibly because, following the dismemberance of things past, we only have two grey langurs. One of them recently forgot its training and reverted to a semi-wild state. However, I’ve had a cunning idea. Specifically, I’ve slammed both of them in a room and set up cage traps outside the door. If one goes wild, my plan is to unlock the door and trap it. Then I can tame them again and again until eventually I can make it stick.
Resource exploration continues slowly. No iron yet, but we have found a vein of bituminous coal.
Malachite
Since the old training room resembled nothing so much as a broom cupboard, I’ve set up a larger one. I’m also digging out an archery range.
If these damn turkey eggs don’t hatch by the end of summer I’m eating them. Personally, if necessary. Sadly my old circus sideshow act where I bit the head off a chicken isn’t going to get me anything like the kudos I got from the other geeks back at Alnisnil.
Argh. Another krutzing gloom! And then I accidentally deleted and had to restore the primary burrow.
I have to go slap together some barrels now (gotta keep plenty of booze on hand!) but I’ll get back to this log soon.
An Ex-Troper
Because I have been reading Syrupleaf.
At the request of my mentor, I've arrived at the fortress of Waterburned to assume his position as chief engineer. As far as I can tell, he spent most of it as the fortress's overseer, the poor bastard; he spent most of his resources on the largest frelling sluice I've ever seen, and stepped down shortly after half the fortress was struck down by a single kobold ambush.
Kobolds, killing dwarves. At least the new overseers have put together something resembling a military. I'm not about to let no slimy little sneak thief rummage through my desk, by Sirab.
The new overseer's been prancing about like a fluffy wambler that fell in a sunshine barrel over the iron strike over by the ocean inlet. Ral knows how he plans on getting them over here, but the hauling squads will be doing double time for a few weeks I'd press a wager. Either way, I'm too busy deciphering these damn files to go look; what does "nefarious devices" even mean?
As far as life goes, I can't say it's too different from the mountainhomes, barring the occasional panic over the weather. I can't quite figure out why the locals fear it so, but apparently the last time they saw my predecessor he was running off into a storm with a flash shrieking about "samples".
Looks like some new traps are going up near the fortress entrance, all well and good; overseer's calling it the PARTICLE ACCELERATOR or somesuch. Goes on and on about how the iron makes us a real fort, but I say we need more blood of the earth! It's not industry until your furnace operators need to take care not to fall into a massive reservoir of molten rock, I say!
And possibly demons. All the good stories have demons.
That's enough today, journal. One of the hunters brought in the biggest damn grasshopper I've ever seen, and rummaging through my predecessor's notes has made me quite hungry. So much vareity, compared to the mountainhomes!
edited 28th May '12 2:46:06 PM by fishsicles
Not nearly a good enough singer for the Choir Invisible, and the Basement Room With A Synth Invisible is much less prestigious.
I'll remember this when the iron-equipped military are standing between you and a horrible fate, citizen fishsicles.
Also, since we don't need machinery that badly, you've been handed a pick and told to dig.
Also also, I've appointed that kid who's the reincarnation of my mentor to be a Maniac-in-Training.
Specifically, a Maniac-in-Potty-Training.
This has been an important post.
edited 28th May '12 3:17:07 PM by CountDorku
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
Lol. Hey for long hauls you can try your hands at mine carts. We do have a massive dwarven generator. to power the rollers. Sounds like the perfect project for a madman.
This part made me laugh.
When you get a chance would you be so kind as to turn on the danger room for those using it. As a mad man you should appreciate locking your warrior into a room filled with mechanically driven training spears. They have to take their lumps or get jabbed in uncomfortable places. Did the final copper armor pieces get finished?
edited 28th May '12 6:01:09 PM by TuefelHundenIV
Who watches the watchmen?
I got fed up with the cancel job spam, so I cancelled the mass-copper-armour production and turned the forges to produce iron stuff. Since I still hate that particular system, I'm doing it step-by-step. I can always slap together a few suits of copper for the Bad Pennies...I should probably assign them to only use red shirts.
...also, that broom closet was a danger room? I was not aware of that. I'm going to need to assign some idiots there from the newly engraved duellin' room. Where's the activation lever? I'm not exactly in the middle of a random idiot shortage to pull it repeatedly.
On another note, that grasshopper? It gave a shitload of meat. I mean, literally half our current meat stockpile of about 120 comes from that one grasshopper, if you count eyeballs and whatnot. (Sadly, due to hauler idiocy, only a few cuts of louse meat were passed around before the rest rotted in the butcher shop. It gave about 40 units of meat, however.)*
Other things:
- For the convenience of future rulers, assuming there are any, I've set up custom uniforms for swords, axes, hammers, maces, and spears, with full iron equipment and leather cloaks. I advise only assigning these to dudes. I'm not fond of tantrum spirals.
- The fort value has passed the million mark. Also, we have about six drinks for every dwarf. And ninety-seven useless kids. That's 40% of the fort. That's as many as four tens, And That's Terrible.
- The one drawback to the secondary depot entrance is that it opens on a gloom-vulnerable area, because that's the only place where a relatively clear path is available. My plan is to clear-cut the forested area, then set up a secondary path to the depot. It's largely gloomsafe, so it shouldn't be too disastrous.
- I have all the above-ground farms preset to be growing the same stuff all year round. There are two large ones near the new depot and vendortrash stockpile, and some smaller ones up on the surface in a heavily fortified and airtight structure that can only be accessed from underground.
edited 28th May '12 11:05:24 PM by CountDorku
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
Roads will prevent trees from growing. The lever for the danger room should be located just outside the door. So you can check quickly on the dwarves in it and quickly tell it to start/stop go to repeat mode.
edited 28th May '12 11:48:12 PM by TuefelHundenIV
Who watches the watchmen?
Update!
Hematite (cont)
Since it’s about six months into my administration, here’s the fort’s vital stats.
Created wealth: 1 072 170
Food stores: 3057
Meat: 126
Fish: NONE LOL
Plant: 319
Seeds: 949
Drink: 1454
Other: 659, including 168 eggs and 325 prepared meals
Population: 248
Probability of sinister anti-duck victory: 0%
Galena
Guess what I found? MORE IRON! We’re going to go from being the worst equipped fort in the Hills of Horrible Doom to being the best. Mainly because nobody except us and the Copperhorn Dolts would willingly go into the Hills of Horrible Doom.
However, by request from Teufel, I’ve slapped together a few suits of copper armour while the smelters gear up for more iron.
Great. A miller has been possessed. He has no useful skills beside milling and siege operating. What’s he going to do, throw an artifact rock? Grind some incredibly good redroot dye?
Hang on. He’s actually collared a crafts workshop and gathered some lignite. Also some gems, logs, cloth, and bones. I can’t wait to see what comes out the other end. (Also, I’d really really krutzing like the next mood to be a fey or secretive armoursmith who creates the ultimate iron breastplate and then goes on to become a blacksmithing god and tool us up for war.)
For a great dwarven record, I’m going to try and dig the biggest bar stockpile known to dwarfkind. Should show up nicely in Sibrek’s Believe It or Not.
While we’re here: Dear Baron Fath Crystalroughness, we both know I should have your job by right of blood. So long as we understand that you’re only allowed to consider yourself a noble because I haven’t ordered my loyal retainers to kill you yet, could you kindly stop mandating crap? You’re just lucky I have an actual use for flasks.
Krutz. Now a raw recruit who is nursing a child has grown attached to a steel battle axe. I have no objection to women serving in the military, but nursing mothers is a wee bit much, especially when they’re holding the only steel item in the fort.
Yay! A human worm baby caravan. Complete with a diplomat. Like the last diplomat I saw, this one is a bloodsucking creature of the night. Oh, he’s not a vampire. He’s an accountant. Everyone knows accountants suck your blood in the middle of the night. Or was that lawyers? Anyway, gods I hope it doesn’t gloom.
We just made 72000 dwarfbucks. The possessed miller exorcised the spirit into the form of a crown named Sundergrieved. I’d prefer it not sunder my greaves, but I suppose it’ll eventually cause the king’s mind to be caught in a battle for dominance between demon-corrupted ducks and the ancient evil that is bound within the crown. Should be the buddy comedy of the year.
The merchants made it in safely, proving the genius of my design. As for whether they’ll make it out again, who knows? The gods are vindictive sons of bitches when it comes to farting on us.
Huh. Oddness. The war-dog cage hidden in the wall on the way to the depot (I’ve christened it the Canine Hidden Assault Initiative Neutralisation Structure of Animals and Wood, or CHAINSAW) has attracted a crowd of puppies that are hanging around it like idiots. Luckily the wagons didn’t harm them; a dead dog in the entranceway is so uncivilised, like something a goblin would do.
I’ve bought a krutzload of stuff from the merchants. Our food count shot up by like a thousand.
Fresh oddness: I have a smelter that doesn’t seem able to actually do anything. I must figure out why not, but first there’s a ton of food going to waste, so I’m willing to file that under something that rhymes with ‘futz it’ until I have a chance to go and give whoever’s responsible for this a good kicking until they stop being dumb.
Limestone
I managed to get the smelters to start actually smelting again. Go me. It involved something odd with the designated stockpile. Ah, what the krutz.
I also have the bar stockpile underway. It took only a few days for the first part to fill up. The next few will probably be a little too rapid for sanity as well. On the other hand, they fill quickly because we have lots of stuff. That’s a good sign.
Uh-oh. I think I’m temporarily sane. Luckily, I have the answer, and it rhymes with “balcohol”.
The Baron is one tremendous asshole. As I write this, he’s ignoring the human worm baby diplomat in favour of pouring large quantities of prickle berry wine down his shout hole in a futile effort not to think about what I will do to him when I get the chance.
Also, there’s another plague of thrips people. The hell *is* a thrips?
Baron just banned exporting flasks. Newsflash, dude! They get claimed by the military or eaten by the secret copper-hungry vampire gnomes.
Grey langur just went wild and got killed by the tame one. Since this does rather spoil my plan to experiment with breeding, I’ve just decided to have the survivor butchered and call it a day.
Iden Stockadepage just became a Swordmaster! Now to get that copper sword off him and give him something made of iron. And the danger room only killed one puppy! Sadly, I’ve got a ranger and a swordsdwarf in the infirmary with cuts on various appendages. Not sure how that happened. I blame the copper-eating vampire gnomes.
I’ve noticed that the squad who are in theory supposed to hold copper stuff are claiming all the iron, and the squads who have been specifically issued iron equipment have decided copper is the bestest thing evar. Someone is going to have to die for this. I’m not sure who, though. Eh.
Sandstone
Why is it that the only people who ever get injured in this fort are the ones who are Very Slow to Heal? Do people who take a week to get over a stubbed toe just…go out of their way to get bits broken? ‘Cause I’ve had this kid in my infirmary since I overthr…er, replaced Tuefel as overseer.
Arghraragh MORE GLOOM. Luckily it was very brief and confined entirely to the northeast corner.
I swear to the gods I’m going to melt down every piece of copper equipment in this fort if that’s what it takes to get my military into iron.
That danger room is worth its weight in adamantine. We now have two axelords.
I love the way my military just…drop finely crafted iron equipment on the ground. We're going to have the best stripper axe maniacs in all dwarfendom.
And it turns out I’m also incredibly good at making buckets! Speaking of which, I think we have enough for now.
I’m beginning to think blood in this hellhole moves around when no-one’s looking. I’ve found bloodstains left by people who are dead, in locations a considerable distance from where they died. Spooky.
Well krutz. Someone wandered into the danger room and died. Hope he wasn’t particularly well-liked.
Nine-month status update!
Created wealth: 1 257 121
Food stores: 4840
Meat 189
Fish 233
Plant 408
Seeds 1086
Drink 1935
Other 989, including 194 eggs and 528 prepared meals
Population: 247
Probability of sinister anti-duck victory: 0%
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
Oh dear. Sounds like someone forgot to put on armour before getting into the danger room. I believe you are right we are surrouned by grotting morons. You sure it wasn't one of the axe wielding maniac strippers?
We so need mine carts to careen recklessly around mining tunnels in.
Who watches the watchmen?
Dwarf Fortress: Putting the F U in FUN!
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
Kytin: Indeed. Nothing is quite as FUUUUUUUUUU inducing as a zombie cascade in an evil biome inside the fort.
Who watches the watchmen?
Actually, I checked the combat logs and it was a child. Luckily, his parents appear emotionally numbed by the awesome engraved bedrooms* and no tantrums as yet.
Given that nobody has seen hide nor hair of a goblin since we embarked, and they aren't listed on the civs page, I'm going to assume that there aren't any. I'm still going to fortify, but that's for megabeast safety, not goblin safety.
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
Good riddance to useless fools and dumb animals. It is not advised to fall down on those training spears or enter the room without armour. The room is a place for elite warriors not these pitiful children and creatures.
I am guessing there are no Gobblins because of how lethal the enviornment is.
Who watches the watchmen?
An Ex-Troper
Waterburned: even the goblins are smart enough to stay away.
Not nearly a good enough singer for the Choir Invisible, and the Basement Room With A Synth Invisible is much less prestigious.I really like that name. Especially since one of my long-term goals is to use magma to somehow melt the northern oceans and capture dangerous sea life for the execution dunking pool.
...is there any way for arrows to trigger pressure plates?
<><
An Ex-Troper
Not that I know of. I think pressure plate triggers are restricted to creatures, liquids, and minecarts of liquid.
edited 29th May '12 9:39:28 PM by fishsicles
Not nearly a good enough singer for the Choir Invisible, and the Basement Room With A Synth Invisible is much less prestigious.
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
Argh. The danger room has notched up another two dead children. I'm thinking that I might set up a larger danger room three or four storeys down, where children are less likely to blunder in like stupid idiot fools.
Also, I've figured out why they're dropping equipment in midfight - they were reserving fancier equipment that had just come out of the forges. As it happens, now we have more than enough iron armour for every member of our military, so I'm increasing that number. Shame about the lack of goblins, really - none of them will earn titles if they have to beat the shit out of five megabeasts to qualify. Especially since so far we haven't actually seen any megabeasts, unless there was something one of you guys neglected to tell me.
Woot Iron. Just watch out that corner has a very high occurrence of evil gloom.
Who watches the watchmen?