Silliest Lines You've Written (Out of context)

So there's a thread for best lines, a thread for worst lines, now a thread for ones that are normally ridiculous, except in context they make sense. Or don't, who knows.

Post up your lines completely out of context save for things like dialogue tags like "X said loudly" and such. That's the only requirement, really.

Here's one of mine: "I fucked a muffin once."

edited 16th Jul '11 1:11:02 AM by Five_X

"The fake is a pie!"

I see what you did there.

“You collapsed pretty much straight away after the watermelon hit you.”

edited 16th Jul '11 6:24:44 AM by RiotousRascal

I can't find any at the moment, but I reckon it'll change when I get to the chapter of my fanfic where a character breaks up with his girlfriend because she has a knock-down, drag-out argument about V For Vendetta with a guy in his residence hall. Just the premise outside of context sounds incredibly silly.

"Don't say it around the septic tanks! They'll get annoy'ed!"

...Come to think of it, this line makes about as much sense in context as it does here. . _ .

edited 16th Jul '11 8:58:07 PM by CrystalGlacia

"I have no idea what shaking spears has to do with anything."

This post was thumped by the Merciless Hammer of Doom

"Facial hair is nothing more than mold!"

"I do everything with extreme speed... including you."

"A bear hug lacks a certain je ne sais quoi when performed by an actual bear."

Not entirely sure if this qualifies, but I only just recently hit the fifty page mark,

"And let us welcome the city's newest superhero," he said in a deep, mocking tone, "The Fashion Disaster. We may panic and grovel for mercy at our leisure."

edited 16th Jul '11 12:52:01 PM by FictionalBasar

Being hugged with two arms, two tongues and a tail is even stranger than coming while hyperventilating. In its own way, however, it is far more enjoyable.

"Why yes, that is a big cannon."

"We've got monkeys from above!"

(Its not so much a quote, more of a conclusion that a particularly snarky character of mine came to)

'Irregardless of species, all males were in fact idiots'

“Brilliant deduction there, perhaps you would like a cookie?”

"You and your loathsome metaphor!"

Or...

"The Glorious Manifest shall not shove such things in such places!"

Waaaaagh!

"Anyway, since my hair isn’t quite powerful enough to do source code analysis..."

This has nothing to do with Yu Gi Oh The Abridged Series, if anyone's wondering.

"People on Nimbus stuck together- sometimes liteally, like when the vats at the candy factory sprung a leak."

The sad thing? I wrote it right after a main character found out her husband had died in a terrible explosion- while the poor woman was pregnant with twins.