Family Friendly Gaming

ok this website has actually become stupid

My Neighbor Totoro (in the DVD > Movies > Animation) has a 64 score

family friendly rating - 50%

oh god

edited 13th Jul '11 9:04:58 PM by CommanderObvious

Everything just seems so... so arbitrary!

None of the sections are connected to each other!

YOU SHOULD NOT MENTION THE BOX ART IN THE GRAPHICS SECTION MY HEAD HURTS

What review does that? What does box art even have to do with reviewing a game?!? It in no way changes the contents which is what you're supposed to be ****ing reviewing!

Fragile Dreams.

Also, why does every game have to have a theme?

The theme of Lego Pirates Of The Caribbean is not that you have to "always search for an answer"! IT IS A SILLY GAME WITH LEGOS AND PIRATES. IT DOES NOT HAVE A THEME.

whatisthisidonteven.jpg.gif.tiff.voc.wav.png

This is maybe 3/4 of Disc 1 of Final Fantasy VII.

-sigh-

4's kind of a stretch, but I guess that's kinda true. Never played 6 so I wouldn't know.

edited 13th Jul '11 9:19:08 PM by sirnoob

Of all the awesome things he could mention about the graphics...he focuses on the box art!?

DOES...NOT...COMPUTE!!!

Because if he invents a theme for the game he can quickly look at whether that complies with Christianity and decide if a game is good or bad without putting any thought into the way things are presented.

Actually that could apply to 4 and 6 if you think about it a little.

edited 13th Jul '11 9:16:05 PM by Kostya

You know, the religious foolishness wouldn't bug me as much as long as it was well written.

.* Reads TWEWY review.*

Mondegreen much?

How did I miss that! Which is he talking about anyway?

Also I think he should be a bit more concerned over Give me all your love. Although he might not have realized what the lyrics are. I know it took me forever.

Maybe it's my nostalgia talking, but the Mega Man X Command Mission review baffles me.

This is much better for families

a rational website for parents?

inconceivable

Checking out the website Barrylocke linked . . .

Hahaha!

edited 13th Jul '11 10:02:20 PM by feotakahari

Yeah, this site is kind-of a Wall Banger at times (or rather, often! ). One thing that gets me is that many of the reviews often list the entire name all through the review (like, if a game's title was "Bugs Bunny's Bodaciously Brilliant Birthday Blast!", you would hear that incredibly long title every time the game would be mentioned). I also agree about how many of the reviews try desperately to find some sort of lesson to learn.

EDIT: [1]

Here, FFG starts the review off by defending Storm City Games (which most of us know as "yet another shovelware maker"), ending by calling Gummy Bears a "sleeper hit"...Uh-oh, I'm actually getting a little interested in that game!

This needs a TV Tropes page, stat!

edited 14th Jul '11 7:48:55 AM by Piqutchi

(Insert Facepalm here)

At what? There's a lot that could be referencing.

At everyhing, that page makes me feel sick,

Damn, and I thought Yatzhee was dick, but this beyond to a concept of "review" that I can understand

Oh boy oh boy I hope they review something from the Shin Megami Tensei series on that site. xD

Well, no need to get facepalmy about the fact that this site actually does what it's purpose is: Rate games according to how "morally acceptable" their content is. Most of us don't share the same standards, but the site isn't meant for people who don't. I do agree that the writing isn't the best. As far as Christian game rating sites go, there are better ones out there.

Oh and this quote made me smile:

Okay the Sonic 06 review is hilarious.

"The down side is psychic powers are used visually by Silver." What...what does that even mean!?

He also mentions "questionable attire" by the female characters. The only one I can think of is Rouge and she's always been like that. Shadow is also a bad guy apparently even though he's compared to Jesus Christ in the game and opposes an obvious Devil expy.

edit: I also find it strange that he never complained about the resurrection thing in the final story and the Elise kiss. I bet he never got that far Shame as I'd like to hear his commentary on that.

edit 2: In his After Years review he does two things.

1. Says the graphics are outdated. 2. Says females are showing too much skin

My question: HOW THE **** CAN YOU TELL!!

He also complains about the constant threats of murder and obsession with revenge while ignoring that these things are in the Bible too.

edit 3: He complains about Fragile Dreams's females showing too much skin. The world has fallen apart, why would people care?

edited 14th Jul '11 8:50:24 AM by Kostya

xD Funny stuff.

Please tell me he has a review of No More Heroes and/or a Kingdom Hearts game. I need to see the reaction to those!

edit: Sadly it appears he doesn't.

edited 14th Jul '11 9:26:52 AM by Kostya

This is from the review of Morrowind:

This fellow creeps me out.

I noticed that. Seriously all great games he talks about apparently have depressing music.

Are we that immune to true art is angsty or something?

Apparently, Fable III got 29% in graphics (and graphics are, IMO, the only thing that game got right).