Coming Out of the Closet

I was informed by a few other tropers that it might be helpful to start a thread for tropers to come out of the closet about their sexuality. Here we can give each other advice on openness and dealing with family members and friends, etc.

"My brain used to be a little bitch, so I mugged it's ass." -kegisak

Good idea to branch this out of the Fetishes thread. I'll copy my post from that:

Is there anyone here who, the instant they met a person (we're talking 9-10 years old here), they knew they were gay? I've known a kid since 5th grade, and I instantly thought he was gay. I didn't avoid him or anything; we hung out in the same group in middle school. He came out his senior year, and I wasn't really surprised, but glad that he had the guts to do it.

Looking back, I might've thrown a few f-bombs his way in the messing around, buddies way, and he called me fat all the time. Hindsight I was probably in the wrong for saying that, but I was pretty damn immature (and angry) in middle school.

edited 16th May '11 8:53:00 PM by Spornicus

PASSWORDISTACO

Well, I suppose I might as well start.

As you might already know, I only really discovered my own bisexuality about a month ago.

...Well, that's not entirely true. It's something I've been throwing around in my head for a good number of years now, but it took the intervention of someone else for me to realize that I actually like dudes quite a bit.

...Anyway, this is something I'm in the middle of doing right now. I already came out to my sister (who is 100% lesbo), and she was pretty damn overjoyed. I guess she likes the idea of a bi little brother. Funny. Planning on telling my best friend within the next week. He's been having some emotional problems, and so have I, so we're planning a get together to talk about it and that's when I'll drop the bomb.

...Not quite too sure how to go about it with my other friends, though. Most of the time we're in a big group...should I just kinda go "By the by, I like dudes! Haaa!" ...I've got no clue.

And my parents might be a bit tough. They like to constantly mention how I'm the 'Last of the *insert last name here* line, and how if I don't have kids it'll die with me, and blah blah blah...they might take it a little hard to know that there's a very good chance I'll end up with a dude for the rest of my life. In general, though, they're very understanding people, and it won't be too bad. Just a tad bit awkward at the start, and maybe a bit of disappointment.

...And once I've told all my friends and family about this, I'm wondering how I should treat it in the future. Is it something I should tell most of the people I strike up a conversation with? Or maybe I should keep it a bit more under wraps? ...I've got no clue how this sort of thing usually goes...

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander

I came out to my best friend first, than to everyone else I knew except family, then my mom.

...Still haven't got around to my little sis or my dad though. >_>

The 5 geek social fallacies. Know them well.

I'd like to tell my mother I'm bisexual, but I don't know how to say it.

I'm sorta waiting for the topic to come up, because I figure if I just say out of nowhere "hey mom, did you know I like boys?", well...it'll make for an awkward moment.

I mean, I guess it'll be awkward either way, but I'd like to minimize the awkwardness. Even though, knowing my mother, she'll probably be accepting and all and yes i'm just rambling again

Heapers’ Hangout

Errrr.

From what I've heard of your dad, that one...might be hard.

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander

My mom just got drunk and then kept on asking if I was gay 'till I caved. >.<

Yeah. :P

edited 16th May '11 9:18:42 PM by inane242

The 5 geek social fallacies. Know them well.

I...

...Well that's odd.

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander

Eh, I'll get around to it when I get around to it. I don't feel it's very important that people know I'm bi.

Underneath the bridge The tarp has sprung a leak And the animals I've trapped have all become my pets

That, too.

I'm not in a relationship, and I probably won't be anytime soon, so it's not really that big an issue for me right now.

Heapers’ Hangout

It's kinda something I want everyone to know.

Just because I feel like it's a part of me. A side that I want everyone to know about.

Well, everyone I trust, anyway.

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander

I never really had to hide it much. I just sort of mentioned it to everyone by talking about cute girls and they were just like "Ok. Whatever". Which is nice. My grandparents don't officially know though I feel that my grandma suspects it rather heavily. It's kind of hard not to when your granddaughter brings up the issue occasionally, is in support of gay rights, and talks about how all the Asian waitresses she sees are really fucking cute...

Her opinion seems to flip flop based on mood. It runs from "I will disown you" to "I will love you anyway".

edited 16th May '11 9:24:43 PM by Aondeug

If someone wants to accuse us of eating coconut shells, then that's their business. We know what we're doing. - Achaan Chah

That's the way most of the LGBT people I've talked to feel. I wish I could stop feeling this way about my masochism though. ._.

edited 16th May '11 9:25:32 PM by inane242

The 5 geek social fallacies. Know them well.

Oddly, I don't think of my sexual orientation as being a very important part of who I am.

Or at least, I didn't until recently.

Heapers’ Hangout

...I'm not a masochist, admittedly.

...Does that cause any problems? If you don't mind me asking?

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander

No, course not! :3

The 5 geek social fallacies. Know them well.

Ah, good good good!

I admit, I'm not too keen on telling people about my fetishes and I'll keep it that way.

...Well, in meatspace, anyway.

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander

I don't really feel that my pansexuality is so important that everyone must know. I also don't feel like hiding it at all so...comments on girls with nice bodies will be spoken without the slightest bit of concern. I've never really had much trouble though.

If someone wants to accuse us of eating coconut shells, then that's their business. We know what we're doing. - Achaan Chah

@Central Avenue and anyone else who's planning on coming out as bi: Make sure you explicitly say that you're bisexual. My parents thought I had come out as gay for about a month because I never once said the word "bisexual" despite having said that I "play for both teams" and such.

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

Oh yeah that's always fun. Everyone thinks I'm a lesbian. Nope. Just a pansexual with a huge preference for women.

Oh well. Easy enough to clear up on my end.

If someone wants to accuse us of eating coconut shells, then that's their business. We know what we're doing. - Achaan Chah

...This is good advice, and yet something that had not occurred to me before.

Thanks, Ironeye.

Heapers’ Hangout

When I told my mom I was gay she asked if I was sure I wasn't Bi three times or so, than said that my being gay was, in her words, "Totaly awesome", then said that she'd rather I was straight. :/

edited 16th May '11 9:54:03 PM by inane242

The 5 geek social fallacies. Know them well.

My mom said that. Didn't give a shit.

If someone wants to accuse us of eating coconut shells, then that's their business. We know what we're doing. - Achaan Chah

Pretty much this. People don't view being straight as a major part of your identity, so why should being gay/bi/whatever-the-fuck?

Underneath the bridge The tarp has sprung a leak And the animals I've trapped have all become my pets

Because prejudice or some shit. Meh I say.

If someone wants to accuse us of eating coconut shells, then that's their business. We know what we're doing. - Achaan Chah