coming out at a young age

I've seen several studies suggesting that gay teens who come out younger (eg 13-15 as opposed to 16-20) tend to have a higher risk of problems, such as attempted suicide or emotional distress.

That's pretty much the opposite of what I expected. Why might coming out earlier be associated with more, rather than less, psychological distress?

More impressionable, more school bullying, and in general, lacking the confidence and mental maturity to go such a route in our current society.

Genuive question: what does "come out" mean here?

Taking a potshot and saying it's short for "Coming out of the closet", or you know, being homosexual.

Thanks.

I've never seen large groups of adults act quite as, well, predatory as other children acted towards me when they thought of me as different. Furthermore, I have seen adults turn a blind eye to predatory children when they thought the kid being targeted had it coming, which I imagine is a standard thought in heavily anti-gay regions. *

edited 5th May '11 10:04:51 AM by feotakahari

Likely culture I would presume. At my age, if someone told me they were gay I would basically shrug and think why did he tell me I don't give a crap. If it were back in early high school, then he would have likely been heavily hassled whereas at adulthood such juvenile idiocy is heavily frowned upon instead of encouraged.

This. As mentioned, kids in middle school are bastards. But High School is pretty good.

In Britain, it's all secondary school.

I am unsurprised at this research, incidentally.

To be honest, whether I came out or not at 13 as opposed to 17 wouldn't have made a damn bit of difference, people bullied me a lot anyway and I was suicidal at 14 all the same so if I could go back in time and re-do all that again, I would come out, at least it would mean a better chance at getting to go out with someone.

I am unsuprised. Almost nobody in my grade takes homosexuality seriously. They use it as a joke.

edited 5th May '11 2:07:00 PM by chihuahua0

So, it's probably because of bullying?

Yeah, children can be quite petty about this whole topic.

True story: when I was 13 or so, some kids started "accusing" me of being gay. I more or less ignored all of that, of course. So, when a girl (who I actually had a bit of a crush on, but whatever) just asked me "hey, are you gay or what?" I sarcastically replied something along the lines of "no, I am actually an hermaphrodite. You see, I have both male and female genitalia".

Dumb move, I know, but I was young and stupid.

She believed that, and told her friends — and in brief, the whole school was convinced (or was faking being convinced, or some combination of the two) that I really was hermaphroditic, and was thoroughly creeped out about that.

All of this was quite annoying for me.

And that was in my case — a straight, fairly confident young male with a loving family and plenty of friends outside school. I just cannot imagine what effect these kids would have had on a young person who was attempting to come to terms with their own sexuality...

edited 5th May '11 2:25:13 PM by Carciofus

One of my good friends is gay and we are in the eighth grade. Everyone already knew, but he kind of came out this year, telling all of his friends. None of us really cared one way or another (I am actually pretty big on promoting gay rights), but other kids aren't so accepting. He told me stories about being beat up for it as early as third grade and it is still going on now. It isn't very surprising however. We live in Utah and even the teachers are kind of against him. In drama we were doing a lip-synch show and in the class my friend is in, she said, "you can use Glee songs as long as they aren't sang by two boys because that is just disgusting and wrong," while staring at him. Also, I have gotten in arguments with other kids over whether being gay is evil and whether you can be born gay. Some have even said out loud, "I hate that kid and all the other fags because they chose such an evil and gross way." Ugh, I think it really hurts my friend and I can see how it is worse in middle school.

So, what do you think parents and teachers could do to reduce homophobic bullying?

Not a whole lot, given for every parent or teacher who does their best to prevent ir or spread awareness, theres likely also one condoning or outright discriminating against them.

Its very simple. Kids are cruel. Society is cruel. Young people don't yet have the suppoprt structure, massive friend networks or mental maturity to truly be ready to face the sort of anti-gay hatred that simmers in a lot of places.

Oh, there is things you can do. Believe it or not, just telling people that it's not OK to bully others based on [factor n] reduces bullying based on factor n. Sure, it won't eliminate it, but it will eliminate casual prejudice, and lower the unspoken support of serious bullies. Then there's organisations like GSA that can give a safe enviroment and a peer group to give support.

But ultimately it's really about the society at large. As above, so below; the values kids learn from their parents, commmunity, media and leaders pass on subconsiously to the way they act. School administration can be one of these factors and can step in when needed.

I wonder if bullying of homosexuals will go down as more famous people come out of the closet, "normalizing" homosexuality.

More famous people? What, like George Takei?

More like Clay Aiken, actually.

Another one comes out of the closet.

Also, the few people that claim they're gay at my school are the ones that are extremely disrepectful, and "coming out" wouldn't hurt their reputation more. Oh, kids...

Not entirely related, but someone I know dropped this erm... gem of a line:

"You can't know if you're homosexual when you're 14; kids that age can't even find their own ass with a GPS."

Lovely...

edited 7th May '11 11:42:11 AM by TheMightyAnonym

I wouldn't put it in that definite of terms, but I can definitely say, your sexuality usually doesn't settle down until somewhere after the mid-twenties, so you can go through homosexual or bisexual stages for no other reason than because your body is producing too much of a particular hormone.

Logic fail.

I've been pretty lucky, I've only ever been called a fag once, and that was by some hoodlum who called everyone that.

edited 7th May '11 11:40:53 AM by inane242

I just want to add in here that you most definitely can know by the age of 14. I knew by then, I was still mired in outrageously blinding religious denial but deep down I knew.