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The Imperium of Man comes to Gensokyo: The Novelization project:

 1 takashi. 0, Fri, 18th Feb '11 4:06:52 PM from Somewhere Relationship Status: Brony
All hail Pinkie Peixes
Sometime last year, We in the IoMctG thread tossed about the idea of turning the FanRP into a Novelized Fanfic. Eventually, the thread became too long, and along with various other reasons such as constantly having to keep in contact with each other, we eventually gave up on trying it.

... UNTIL TODAY!! For I shall take it upon myself to gather the posts into a prose format for all to see on my Deviantart account.  *

Those of you also from the thread and our lurkers know that this shall be a tremendous task. Therefore, I request my fellows to aid me in this task by directing me in how to proceed in the various objectives.

Things we must do:

  • Turning the first 10 or so pages into a coherent story with a proper lead into the rest of the story.

  • Make the Tyranids less Stu-ish.

  • resolve the whole Eldar thing.

  • Make Caligula's fight not-AssPully.

Things I'd like to do:

  • Make Reimu and Marisa's roles a teensy bit bigger.

  • Add the PC-98 girls (gradually)

So first item on the agenda: The first 10+ pages. Sullen Frog's intro shall be posted first(if he gives me his permission to do so.), so then how shall we start?

 2 Colonial1. 1, Fri, 18th Feb '11 4:17:45 PM from The Marvelous River City
Crazed Lawrencian
Why the PC-98s?
Proud member of the IAA

What's the point of being grown up if you can't act childish?
 3 takashi. 0, Fri, 18th Feb '11 4:19:50 PM from Somewhere Relationship Status: Brony
All hail Pinkie Peixes
'Cause I like them, and because it just doesn't feel right without Mima or Shinki.  *

But we don't have to.

edited 18th Feb '11 4:22:41 PM by takashi.0

Not Literally Me
Okay, a few retcons I'd like to make (fully open for debate):

Remove Isha's brief appearance.

Ignore the entire 'Yukari is a Chaos god' thing.

Make it clear that Isaac is connected to the Harvester, not a generic Great Unclean One.

Return Zee's torture to the realms of a Gory Discretion Shot Noodle Incident.

Remove any unnecessary padding (such as the entire Caligula fight, for starters, but also the fight with the Umbra, the fights in the Bamboo Forest prior to the Orkz appearance there),

Remove the Knights Of Vengeance (given their maker was banned for misconduct).

Remove non-essential components of various scenes (for example, no-one but Isaac and Arcturus should be present during the final confrontation between the two of them).

Remove Lana's affection towards Remilia (as it served no ultimate purpose and was squicky).

Ignore anything that happens in the first ten-twelve pages and replace it with newly-written material serving as an introduction for the major characters.

And finally, if Makuta doesn't mind, return the Tyranids to non-talking gribblies (as it seemed to be a component in their scrappy-dom).


Also, don't include the PC-98s. It merely serves to screw up the timeline by trying to shoe-horn them into sequences they were never intended to be in.

edited 18th Feb '11 4:21:42 PM by MadeOfAxes

"One thing, though- apparently the eldest goat is the bastard child of Muhammad Ali and the Hulk." ~ Exelixi, on The Three Billy Goats Gruff.
 5 Colonial1. 1, Fri, 18th Feb '11 4:39:42 PM from The Marvelous River City
Crazed Lawrencian
Hang on. The death of the Umbra brings in the Hrud. Makes their presence have a little more reason to be there.

edited 18th Feb '11 4:41:26 PM by Colonial1.1

Proud member of the IAA

What's the point of being grown up if you can't act childish?
Not Literally Me
Again, I never saw the point they fulfilled (other than Plot-Relevant Age-Up). But if it's absolutely neccesary to boost certain characters ages by a few years, leave it in.
"One thing, though- apparently the eldest goat is the bastard child of Muhammad Ali and the Hulk." ~ Exelixi, on The Three Billy Goats Gruff.
 7 Colonial1. 1, Fri, 18th Feb '11 4:43:56 PM from The Marvelous River City
Crazed Lawrencian
Part of it was so that the Necrons could utilise Mokou. In other words, the beasts were dragged to Gensokyo.

edited 18th Feb '11 4:44:50 PM by Colonial1.1

Proud member of the IAA

What's the point of being grown up if you can't act childish?
Lord of shadows
return the Tyranids to non-talking gribblies

Eh, fine, but I still want the Swarmlord to keep that connection to Yamame.
To be seen, stand up

To be heard, speak up

To be appreciated, shut up
Yes, that bit at least has got to stay in on account of Yamame's infestation and subsequent purification by way of turning into a fairy being mentioned in the second RP.
 
 10 Sullen Frog, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:34:40 PM from Voormithadreth Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
Whisperer in Darkness
If possible, I would like the battle with Magnus to last a bit longer; I don't know why, but I felt that the heroes' final fight with the daemon primarch of Tzeentch went a little too quickly, even with the immaterium engine.
 11 Lemurian, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:36:56 PM from Touhou fanboy attic Relationship Status: I won't say I'm in love
Native Goddess
I say keep the 98's out of it. Like I explained while we were playing; if you're going to add one, you're going to have to add the whereabouts of all of them or else don't bother.

Things I'd like:

  • Have Daiyousei defeat Caligula
  • Remove Utsuho's appearance at the Human Village in the early parts (sorry, Awe, but it doesn't fit)
  • Remove Yuyuko's appearance in the Snow-Covered Forest (sorry, Zudak)
  • Remove Wriggle's appearances (they never led anywhere)
  • Remove Yamame's corruption-gathering-scenes (the end-result never happened, after all), but please keep the hunger-scenes
  • Remove Yukari's first strike towards the Tyranids
  • Remove Shinki's interception when the Tyranids try to take Alice's house; just attribute it to the Kitsune
  • Shorten the fight against the Empress of Rot in Heaven
  • Add the epic battle outside the Tengu Village
 12 Colonial1. 1, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:40:23 PM from The Marvelous River City
Crazed Lawrencian
Could Zolomon fight alongside Dai to do that? It's a little relevant that he get banged up.

edited 18th Feb '11 5:40:56 PM by Colonial1.1

Proud member of the IAA

What's the point of being grown up if you can't act childish?
Remove Yuyuko's appearance in the Snow-Covered Forest (sorry, Zudak)

Haha, I don't even remember that. Must not have been important. 'sides, Yuyuko's basically your character now, yeah?

Actually, do you have Youmu too? Because I'd like to play her, if that's okay with you. Not that it's likely that either of them will show up again!
 
Not Literally Me
Oh yeah: remove the references to the Skulltaker (including Flandre's head exploding) and remove the exceedingly random fight with the daemons and the Swarmlord in the Voile.
"One thing, though- apparently the eldest goat is the bastard child of Muhammad Ali and the Hulk." ~ Exelixi, on The Three Billy Goats Gruff.
 15 Lemurian, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:44:40 PM from Touhou fanboy attic Relationship Status: I won't say I'm in love
Native Goddess
@Colonel: I'd prefer not...it's symbolically very important that the Gensokyoans deal with certain threats by themselves. And this was a personally very important battle for Yamame and Daiyousei, seeing as they were respectively the friend and de-facto protector of Kisume.

@Zudak: Yeah, I've got Youmu. You can have her, no problem.
 16 takashi. 0, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:45:16 PM from Somewhere Relationship Status: Brony
All hail Pinkie Peixes
Remove Isha's brief appearance.

...But wasn't she needed to cure somebody of a deadly Nurgle plague?

Ignore the entire 'Yukari is a Chaos god' thing.

I think that was made Canon Discontinuity anyway.

Make it clear that Isaac is connected to the Harvester, not a generic Great Unclean One.

I actually thought it was pretty clear but whatevs.

Return Zee's torture to the realms of a Gory Discretion Shot Noodle Incident.

Might be a tad difficult, but okay.

Remove any unnecessary padding (such as the entire Caligula fight, for starters, but also the fight with the Umbra, the fights in the Bamboo Forest prior to the Orkz appearance there)

I don't remember 2/3s of that, so I'll have to bring it up when I get there. As for Caligula, I thought it might've been important for some reason, but I forgot.

Remove the Knights Of Vengeance (given their maker was banned for misconduct).

Done.

Remove non-essential components of various scenes (for example, no-one but Isaac and Arcturus should be present during the final confrontation between the two of them).

Okay.

Remove Lana's affection towards Remilia (as it served no ultimate purpose and was squicky).

I thought was supposed to lead into Zee's crush on Remilia. Am I wrong?

Ignore anything that happens in the first ten-twelve pages and replace it with newly-written material serving as an introduction for the major characters.

Naturally.

And finally, if Makuta doesn't mind, return the Tyranids to non-talking gribblies (as it seemed to be a component in their scrappy-dom).

I doubt he'll mind too much.

But how about this: the characters (save Yaname) don't understand them, but we the audience do. (As in, if we get a chapter focus on them, we read their language as English Low Gothic.) Does that sound okay or stupid and sueish?

Also, don't include the PC-98s. It merely serves to screw up the timeline by trying to shoe-horn them into sequences they were never intended to be in.

Hey didn't say bring them all in. I only meant like a handful to show that we haven't rendered their era as discontinuity. I probably should have made that note.

edited 18th Feb '11 5:57:51 PM by takashi.0

 17 Colonial1. 1, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:48:58 PM from The Marvelous River City
Crazed Lawrencian
Query: What exactly did Dai do throughout all this?

Anyway, it's important that Zolomon get his armour breached at some point before the Magnus fight. Along with that, more clues that the Judicators have a rather sinister and mechanical set of ancestors.
Proud member of the IAA

What's the point of being grown up if you can't act childish?
Not Literally Me
We decided Zee wasn't going to crush on Remilia (at least I think we did).

About Isaac and Harvey, I was referring to the earlier stages of the game, where I hadn't quite thought out his abilities fully.
"One thing, though- apparently the eldest goat is the bastard child of Muhammad Ali and the Hulk." ~ Exelixi, on The Three Billy Goats Gruff.
 19 Lemurian, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:53:06 PM from Touhou fanboy attic Relationship Status: I won't say I'm in love
Native Goddess
Well, before Cirno's Ascension, she was something of a leader of all the young Youkai and Fairies in the Tau camp. However, when she heard of the news, she rushed to the lake to see what had happened. Once she became blessed with the position of High Priestess of Sedna, she rushed back to the refugees to make sure they were all right. At that time, the Slaaneshi were attacking, so she hurried into the fray.
 20 Sullen Frog, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:54:41 PM from Voormithadreth Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
Whisperer in Darkness
Well, the Magnus fight, if I recall correctly, amounted to Mystia and the Prismriver Sisters knocking out his coven of sorcerers with their song and breaking the concentration he needed to maintain his spell, and then after that he was basically fighting kitsune until the Blood Ravens and Steel Judicators showed up. Shortly after that, IMMATERIUM ENGINE.
 21 takashi. 0, Fri, 18th Feb '11 5:59:54 PM from Somewhere Relationship Status: Brony
All hail Pinkie Peixes
Eh, fine, but I still want the Swarmlord to keep that connection to Yamame.

Yes, that bit at least has got to stay in on account of Yamame's infestation and subsequent purification by way of turning into a fairy being mentioned in the second RP.

I was gonna keep it anyway, so yeah.

If possible, I would like the battle with Magnus to last a bit longer; I don't know why, but I felt that the heroes' final fight with the daemon primarch of Tzeentch went a little too quickly, even with the immaterium engine.

I'll need some specifics, but alright.

Have Daiyousei defeat Caligulia.

Done.

Remove Yamame's corruption-gathering-scenes (the end-result never happened, after all), but please keep the hunger-scenes.

...wut? Do you mean the Genokyian-Nid hybrids aside from her?

Remove Shinki's interception when the Tyranids try to take Alice's house.

Done, I thought that was rather silly anyway.

Add the epic fight outside Tengu village.

I'll need details first.

Oh yeah: remove the references to the Skulltaker (including Flandre's head exploding) and remove the exceedingly random fight with the daemons and the Swarmlord in the voile.

I thought the bold part was supposed to be important. No?

We decided that Zee wasn't going to have a crush on Remilia (At least I think we did.)

We did not. Or at the very least, I distinctly remember Sullen asking for reasons that Zee would like Remilia.

@Lemurian: Okay, thanks.
 
 23 Lemurian, Fri, 18th Feb '11 6:04:45 PM from Touhou fanboy attic Relationship Status: I won't say I'm in love
Native Goddess
No, Yamame was given a mission from the Swarmlord to gather traces of the different corruption-types of Chaos (Rot of Nurgle and stuff like that). She went to into the Underworld and raided Orin's corpse-collection to get a sample, but it was never mentioned again. Just remove any mention of it.
Not Literally Me
I believe he then decided to cancel that train of thought for various reasons (Squick being one of them). Neither have shown any inclination towards the other since shortly after Zee's redemption.

And no, Flandre's head exploding is not that important. It merely served as an introductory device for the Skulltaker.
"One thing, though- apparently the eldest goat is the bastard child of Muhammad Ali and the Hulk." ~ Exelixi, on The Three Billy Goats Gruff.
 25 takashi. 0, Fri, 18th Feb '11 6:09:02 PM from Somewhere Relationship Status: Brony
All hail Pinkie Peixes
[up][up] Okay, that's out.

[up] But didn't also show her being tempted by Khorne?

Total posts: 130
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