ITT: Write a Rousing Speech

Pretty simple. The above poster will give you a topic and you gotta write a rousing speech for or against it. The manlier the better.

Being able to has cheezburger

Hello again tropers

My dear comrades. For too long we have been denied. Just our fathers had been denied and their fathers before them. For too long have we stood upon the threshold of our desires, gazing upon what we could never hold in our grasp. Our enemies would taught us, sneer and jibe, holding that which we had sought just out of reach. Our journey has been long and arduous. Many of us have faltered and fallen along he way. But no more, I say, no more. For today is that day we have prayed for. The day we have shed blood for. The day when we finally take our rightful object in our grasp and forfill the promise of our generations.

Today! We! Can! Has! CHEESEBURGER!

Choosing a DVD to watch.

There comes a time in every man's life, a time for a decision. So it is now. Our options are clear; down each road lies the possibility—the probability—of disappointment, sheer and bloody. But this I promise you: whatever our choice, whatever our decision, we will take it with no regrets. No fear in our hearts. Once we have committed our choice, it will be too late to shrink, too late to withdraw; we will push on through to the end. Victory or chaos. Glory or death.

The choice is yours, gentlemen. Which DVD shall it be?

The next poster has acquired a new MP3 player.

edited 16th Jan '11 12:05:49 AM by SabresEdge

Charlie Stross's cheerful, optimistic predictions for 2017, part one of three.

Since the day I was born, I have loved music. Since the first note I ever heard, the first sound of a melody that made me laugh as a child, I have dreamed of this day. This day where all sound is mine to play, mine to pause, mine to shuffle. This day, when I can hear what I want, wherever I want, however I want and with whoever I want. Today I am freed from the tyranny of silence. Today I can always hear music.

Discovering you didn't get something at Walmart you were meant to get, and now you have to go back for it.

Now is not a time for regret; no, there are plenty of those. Blame will get us nowhere, neither will going without.

The only way forward is the way back, so don't forget to cross that bridge when you get there! You have but to return and you will find what you seek. Strive to improve and keep this event close to your heart, and next time you will not forget.

Also, you might as well pick up some chocolate while you're there.

The next post must write their speech on getting up in the morning (or not) on time for work after an all-night gaming/Archive Binge/party/etc session.

I call forth Unlimited Stories!

Though I know the sun has yet to rise this morning (since it's still January duh), and I must be at work earlier, because a co-worker called in sick, it is difficult. For though I managed to work my way through an MST3K marathon, I have only received a brief amount of rest. Nevertheless, I must persevere, and get up, for it is what is required of me!! I can do this; the road may be arduous, but it can be done!

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Nervous to try a new restaurant.

Embroiled in slave rebellion, I escaped crucifixion simply by declaring 'I am Vito', everyone else apparently being called 'Spartacus'.

Today, we face an opponent that has thus far been offensive to all senses but one. Today, we face an enemy that has destroyed our beloved place of business to replace with what may or may not be filth. But, we must face this enemy else we lose all dignity, all sense of taste. And should our tastebuds be ravaged or the price be to high for our Pyrrhic Victory, then let us know this THAT WE CAME AND CONQUERED THIS NEW RESTAURANT AND THAT WE MAY BE THE DEFENDERS OF TASTE BUDS EVERYWHERE!

Getting on TV Tropes

Hello again tropers

Yes, we have responsibilities. Yes, we have better things to do. But by god, if WE don't catalouge all of the storytelling devices, stock plots and character archtypes used in Doctor Who and Suzumiya Haruhi, who will? It is our duty, nay, our very purpose in life, to do so! To make wild guesses! To discuss things that bug us! If we must ruin our own lives and vocabularies, then that's a sacrifice we'll have to make! TO YKTTW! TO FRIDGE LOGIC! TO NIGHTMARE FUEL! TO FAST EDDIE! TO CROWNING MOMENTS! TO IDIOMS AND DEVICES! TO TROPES!

Doing math homework.

edited 16th Jan '11 2:55:32 PM by Firestarter

Everything happens for a reason. The reason is a chaotic intersection of chance and the laws of physics.

We are all gathered today with one goal. To finish this bothersome, tiresome homework, so we can go out in the street and have fun. We must finish this, in order to go on with our lives. This homework...she will not be solved while you're hanging out and goofing around. So, I ask you, as friends, to DEAL WITH IT.

Buying a new computer.

edited 18th Jan '11 7:27:33 AM by juancarlos11

It's not exactly naive. And it can happen. But it's tough. And definetly worthwhile.

This wretched, horrible, slow, virus infested peice of technology in front of you must be destroyed. It has served you well for many years, but now it's time is passed. A new one must take it's place. It will be faster, stronger, better, with more memory and a portable and convinient size! It may be a mac, or a PC, it may have windows, it may not. It may be expensive, but it'll be worth it, and the new computer will serve you well in the days to come!

Eating a cheese sandwich.

edited 18th Jan '11 1:49:43 PM by Firestarter

Everything happens for a reason. The reason is a chaotic intersection of chance and the laws of physics.

Filibuster!

I find it quite appalling that we tolerate the economic scam of adding cheese to a sandwich and charging 30 cents more just for this *

. What good is a slice of cheese? It is probably not genuine cheese anyway! The cheese that people usually put inside sandwiches is the pre-sliced, processed oil and water! We must protect the authentic, natural produce and not become consumers that are nothing more than puppets to the corporate machinery! Especially if it is grilled cheese. What is so healthy about that?

• Purchasing a new bed

Now using Trivialis handle.

Friends, wife, for so many nights have the springs of adversity robbed us of our rest. For so many days, our battles have been twofold: those everyday battles and those to stay awake. To this I say, no more! Today, we march, somber and sleep deprived, to the nearest Sleepy's and we shall by a new mattress! Nay, we will buy a new bed and our comfort, and the comfort of our children shall be assured. We shall seize the day! Fully rested and more invigorated than our enemies!

Getting the new Duke Nukem game after reading the bad reviews of it.

edited 20th Jun '11 1:16:22 PM by wannabeotaku

Hello again tropers

Friends. Family, Assorted stuffed toys. I know, that I may have erred you by purchasing this game at the local market known as HMV, but it was for the best. I think - nay, feel - that the critics are lying. I will not be dictated to, by a a mass of overpaid nerds! I will make sure that I play this here videogame, for better; for worse! I will triumph. I hope that you will believe that I believe in my cash.

Buying a newspaper.

edited 20th Jun '11 1:54:15 PM by Inhopelessguy

Are you tired of having nothing to catch your attention! Well, good news! By purchasing the newspaper, you're bound to find something that interests you, whether it be philosophical inquiries, current events, or Sudoku!

You also get a complementary table cover at no extra charge! Just bring the newspaper to a barbecue or a cookout and spread it on the table to protect it from the heat and the mess! Two for the price of one!

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Turning on the light bulb.

Now using Trivialis handle.

You, right there.

Yeah you.

What the hell is wrong with you? This lightbulb? A mere insignificant worm compared to you! Conquer it! Make it your little whore! TWIST THAT SUMBITCH UNTIL IT CRIES FOR MERCY! WE WILL NOT STOP UNTIL THAT BULB IS NICELY FIT ONTO THAT SOCKET YOU HEAR ME! WE! WILL! NOT! STOP!

Watching a commercial.

edited 3rd Jul '11 12:24:59 AM by Hanz

Commercials? The dreaded tool of a consumerist society! We will stand no more for there commercials , Friends! Neighbours! Dudes! Duddettes! We must Rise Against these things that clog the airways and bring them down!

Except the Old Spice guy , He cans stay!

Drinking (Or Snorting) Coke.

Oh Lord, forgive the misprints! Andrew Bradford, American book-publisher

Enough with the soft drinks! They sting the tongue, make you hyperactive, and just are a poor alternative to water. Coca-Cola and its variants have long pressed the public to replace their essential nutrient and a daily part of their diet, but in the end, it is the clear plastic bottle and the easy-install filters that will be triumphant. Join us in our campaign to restore the rightful place of water and demote Coca-Cola!

Writing a rousing speech.

Now using Trivialis handle.

There comes a time in every man and woman's life where he must raise the voices of thousands. Where he must take hold of the public's imagination and light the fires of emotion that they have kept dark. Today is that day for you. Today, you will be in the public eye and you will speak with the voice of a hundred-no a thousand people. Today you must give a rousing speech!

It's your birthday

Hello again tropers

I want to thank you all for coming to congratulate my birthday! Indeed, it is an important gesture to recognize one's day of birth, and you have all done something I really appreciate. I want you to have a good time today, because after all, you came to celebrate and have fun!

Playing the piano.

Now using Trivialis handle.

If music be the food of love, it with just these ivory keys that can invoke emotion and inspire revolution. Without it, the world would be filled with desolate silence and unbearable quiet. So whether a great symphony or the simplest melody, fortissimo or piano, play on!

Brushing teeth.

Everything happens for a reason. The reason is a chaotic intersection of chance and the laws of physics.

Highschoolers! Are you tired of eating the same boring stuff every day? Do you feel that "school lunch" has become another way to say "inedible shit"? Do you feel treated like subhuman shit (read: student) and/or a prison inmate? Are you angry and disappointed at the education system?

Never fear! Vote for Strange Dwarf and prepare to welcome pizza into the school menu! Bygone are the days of muddy soups, moldy potatoes and tasteless re-heated crap. Now, tasty re-heated crap will be served on your table for no extra charge! Pizzas for all tastes and dietary needs. Extra selection available to vegans. To make the students' voice heard. To make the Students' Council something more than a popularity contest. Strange Dwarf for president. Thank you.

Meh. And I ignored "brushing teeth", too. I'm ashamed of myself.

edited 19th Jul '11 4:52:08 AM by StrangeDwarf

"Why don't you write books people can read?"-Nora Joyce, to her husband James

You may want to post a subject so that we can write a speech.

It is very important to address the title and thesis of the talk so that it can be identified and summarized! This ensures that the audience can understand the subject matter. Leaving this out can confuse the listeners. Always maintain a sense of coherence for your audience!

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Volunteer work at a hospital.

Now using Trivialis handle.

Comrades, for too long have the sick suffered, if we do not help who will answer the call? Will you? I know I will, for it is your duty to help your fellow man when you are well, so Mothers, Farthers, Sons and Daughters, help the sick.

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Big Battle against a Gundum

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXkI1sTDoEg

No! It is folly that you think you can directly take on the giant mechanical creature. You must find a way to minimize your risks and bring that down some other way. You have no chance if you are reckless. Be wise, my friend! Don't lose control of your emotions!

Taking a picture with your camera.

Now using Trivialis handle.

Everyone, the days has long gone when it is enough to keep a picture of the moments in one's mind. Today, we have cameras, and by all means that is what they are meant to do. So, take a picture with your camera, be proud that you can go to sleep easy knowing that you had use your camera today.

Parking your vehicle properly.

If a chicken crosses the road and nobody else is around to see it, does the road move beneath the chicken instead?