Website / Not Always Working

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Not Always Working is a sister site to Not Always Right, added to the network in 2012. In a direct contrast to Not Always Right, Not Always Working focuses on tales of incompetent, lazy, and sometimes even malicious workers. Bad employees, horrible bosses and managers, and the occasional cool person can be found here. As always, take care when looking through the stories.


Not Always Working contains examples of:

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     D - K 

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     S - Z 

  • Sarcasm-Blind:
    • "Sure, I'll... schedule my parents' anniversary for a different day next time." "That's more like it!"
    • This collector somehow failed to realize that the debtor's comment about having to start a meth lab to make the suggested payment (NZ$1000 per week, or about US$800 - this after the debtor explaining he only made NZ$320 in that time) was not an option the debtor was seriously considering. To top it off, the collector somehow failed to realize the suggestion was illegal.
    • This one almost led to an increase in one individual's student loan payments.
  • Scary Black Man: This customer, which leads to a case of Mistaken For Stalker.
  • Schmuck Bait: "Hey, this file I just got in my email says it has an important message about my bank account! It's not from my bank, though, but it must be important, since it says "IMPORTANT!"
  • Schoolyard Bully All Grown Up: "When I was young, we just found a scrawny kid and beat him up when we were bored.”
  • Sci Fi Ghetto:invoked This bookstore seems to have fallen victim to it, much to the disappointment of both the customer and the employee.
  • Screw Politeness, I'm a Senior!: This bus driver seems to use the trope regularly, given that he seems to have a reputation with the bus company that hired him.
  • Screw the Rules, I Have Connections!:
    • This character seems to be under the impression this is the case for her, since her uncle's the assistant manager. Comes apart when the uncle in question fires her for her attitude.
    • This coworker is "in tight" with the assistant manager, and uses this as an excuse to boss an employee around. Unfortunately for him, he's trying to boss around the son of the business's owner. Oops.
    • This coworker is deathly afraid that this is the case with the sales manager (who happens to be the boss's wife), to the point that said coworker tries to stop the submitter from writing a complaint to them, even erasing a draft of the email in the effort. ("This is for your own good!") It turns out the boss appreciates the complainer's honesty and guts, and the sales manager's work improves significantly as a result of the complaint.
    • This waitress is rude to customers, brings out the wrong food, and then flat-out ignores their complaints, claiming that nobody will stop her because her dad's the owner. And, of course, she then goes absolutely ballistic when the customers refuse to give her a tip for the piss-poor service.
    • This story concerns an asshole who constantly sexually harasses female employees of a theatre production, and his equally-asshole father who refuses to acknowledge that any wrongdoing is taking place no matter how much the other employees complain. It backfires on them when a security employee who has had enough duct-tapes him to a table after he gets particularly aggressive with her, and when the boss threatens to have her fired over it, the owner steps in and fires him and his son instead, in the meantime setting them up for the security employee to sue them both for the sexual harassment (the son for doing it, the father for pretending it wasn't happening).
    • The owner of this restaurant defies any attempts by other people to claim this, as a matter of restaurant policy.
    • These cops refuse to do anything about a groom not only refusing to quiet down his party but also having far more people in his hotel room than the fire code allows, simply because he happens to be in the military. Fortunately, his commanding officer isn't having it, and the groom ends up demoted and discharged for it.
  • Screw the Rules, I Make Them!:
    • This Arena Employee tries to stop a teenage girl and her younger sister from leaving their seats and going to the bathroom, claiming those under 18 cannot leave their seats without an adult, a rule she made up. When the teenager points out no such rule exists and she's 18 and tries to leave, the employee calls security to stop them and lies that the girls tried to cause a scene and made threats. Too bad there were onlookers who called out on her lies and how she didn't bother younger children than the girls who were also leaving their seats without their parents. Even the security criticizes the employee for making up the rules and her unlawful interference with patrons. The employee was given disciplinary action and wasn't allowed back to work until she memorized their policy.
    • This company's policy is that every manager has to work at least one holiday so the rest of the store's employees can have a chance to take them off. Naturally, there's one manager who's decided he will not work any holidays - if the entire rest of the store has to work every Thanksgiving and Christmas rather than spend them with their families to facilitate this, so be it. He's soon demoted and moved to a different store when someone picks up on this and reports it to corporate—but not before that manager is also forced to work both Thanksgiving and Christmas.
    • Again for this manager - days off at the gymnasium they work for are on a first-come, first-serve basis, but even though the submitter was the first one, the manager scheduled them for a day they wanted off anyway because nobody else wanted to work that day either. To top it off, the submitter puts in their two weeks' notice (which would likely have happened anyway)...and the manager tries to schedule the submitter after their last day.
    • This manager tries to invoke it by saying "YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO! I'M THE MANAGER!" For context, the manager is trying to give a customer a pizza that got dropped on the floor in violation of health and safety codes. In front of the customer. Eventually the employee wins the argument.
    • This Tax Agent against company rules, send a customer's tax return to the IRS without checking her latest check stub, delaying the customer from getting her tax refund. And when the Tax Company, as an apology for the delay, gives her the money now until she can pay back the company with her tax refund once it arrives, the same Tax Agent who was responsible for this mess in the first place, rather than wait for the customer to come to the Tax Company after her work at school was done, came to the customer's school unannounced to not only give her the money but make her sign an unfair contract that would charge the customer if she didn't pay back the company in 45 days, something the company didn't approve. Due to the Agent's greedy nature and working behind the company which cause the customer much trouble and stress, the CEO of the company gave the customer a cash settlement for her troubles and the Tax Agent was fired.
  • Screw the Rules, I'm Beautiful!:
    • This person certainly thinks so, but... "Let's see if you being 'pretty' will matter to your manager, shall we?"
    • "I'M PRETTIER! MEN SHOULD BE INTERESTED IN ME!"
    • A male example here.
    • This girl shows up to work in a factory and completely disregards the dress code there, wearing fancy clothes and refusing to wear steel-toed boots. Furthermore, she refuses to work on a machine because she'll get dirty and won't help with crates because she'll break a nail. As the entry states, she only lasted two days.
    • One woman in an office uses her feminine charms to get what she wants. Unfortunately for her, her charms don't work on her boss, so she ends up having to swap her office (rearranged so that the computer screen is not visible from the outside; services obtained by said methods so nobody will know she's not actually working) with another employee who purportedly has an actual business need for said rearrangements (they work on financial data that they don't necessarily want the casual observer to see).
  • The Scrooge: This bank manager is one on the level of Scrooge McDuck himself; what kind of person calls the police over someone accidentally being given one dollar too much?
  • Secret Test: A hotel manager here sabotages a guest's request in order to make one, with unpleasant results.
  • Secret Test of Character: Here, where a situation involving an Angry Black Man attempting to purchase a gun under suspicious circumstances turns out to be a test of the employee.
  • Separated by a Common Language: Taken Up to Eleven here. The waitress looks at the British woman like she's speaking Mandarin Chinese, but when the British woman tries speaking in an American accent, the waitress understands her just fine.
  • A Sinister Clue: Referenced here.
  • Skewed Priorities:
    • This teacher refuses to let her students leave the class during a fire alarm because they're taking an exam. She would rather the students burn to death rather than leave an exam unfinished. Luckily the director came, got all the students out, and the teacher was fired and sued by the school.
    • This coworker prefers working electricity to a house.
    • This pizza delivery worker was involved in an auto accident that damaged property (including another person's car). The first thing he did? Borrow a neighbor's cell phone to call his job to make sure he wouldn't lose it, rather than check on the occupants of the car. This, among other acts (such as lying to police) eventually caused him to lose said job.
    • This guard is more worried about the fallout from a potential Ambulance Chaser (without any proof that the seizure victim in question would even consider it, for the record) than actually saving the person's life, to the point he actively tries to stop emergency services from doing so. Because interfering with emergency services is a serious crime, the obstructive behavior gets him a criminal record, which means he can no longer work as a security guard (or in many other jobs, for that matter).
    • This doctor puts patient turnover ahead of patients' well-being. "Dr. Jerk" would be insufficient to describe him.
    • This receptionist thinks finalizing her nose job on the phone was more important than getting a patient who's in pain to meet the Doctor. What's worse was the patient was the only one in the lobby, meaning the receptionist could have done this at literally any other point in time without issue. The receptionist was later fired.
    • This division officer. Someone else daring to get married in a manner other than the way he did so? That's threatening the sanctity of his marriage! Having an affair with the daughter of a rear admiral, though? No, that's perfectly fine (until someone takes that information to his wife).
    • This photo lab manager catches another employee she doesn't get along with selling cigarettes to a regular customer without checking his ID because they both know he is in his 40's, and immediately claims because she's friends with that man's mother, she knows he's actually a 14-year-old boy with a "growth disease" that just makes him look like he's 40, and she's going to report that employee and get them fired for selling cigarettes to a minor. The manager she goes to reprimands her for standing by and letting this happen while hoping that a coworker will get fired over it, rather than actually stepping in and stopping the transaction if she's so sure that the customer is a minor.
    • This caller, after wiping her baby's bottom with some wipes and having the baby's butt start to bubble, is more worried about how the company's going to compensate her rather than the health of her baby.
    • This doctor gets an infant with a fever of 106 degrees Farenheit, and rather than try to find what's causing this life-threatening condition, and treat it, fixates on a birthmark, accusing the parents of being abusive because they're more worried about the unexplained fever than getting a birthmark they were told would go away on its own surgically removed. Thankfully, the child survived, and the birthmark disappeared on its own, exactly as promised, by the age of 6, but the story does have an at-best Bittersweet Ending: the submitter was the only one of six children who suffered from this unexplained malady and lived through that night.
  • Small Name, Big Ego:
  • Smug Snake: The workers in these stories, until they lose that smile:
  • Snipe Hunt:
  • The Social Darwinist: This manager never donates to cancer research because he believes that diseases like cancer help prevent overpopulation.
  • Spanner in the Works: These prankster employees unwittingly foil a shoplifting scheme that includes their assistant manager as a collaborator.
  • Speaks Fluent Animal: No, seriously, that's a really smart raccoon.
  • Spoonerism: The shitted feets.
  • Stay in the Kitchen:
    • This video game store cashier is disgusted when a girl walks in to retrieve a game. The game was for the girl's brother, but the cashier's disgust and remarks are, well, disgusting.
    • Thankfully, not all misogynists are beyond redemption.
    • This cashier seems to think that women are completely incapable of doing any woodwork.
    • When a cashier gives a female customer a hard time (including dropping the trope name), the customer's five-year-old brother proceeds to lay a verbal smackdown.
    • A bizarre case here where a female employee clearly believes that auto maintenance and repair is beyond a woman, but the male employee she summons clearly sees that in this case, the woman who had to pop the hood had things in hand.
    • Inverted here, when a man isn't employed because the worker thinks they're not as hard-working as women. As the story says, sexual discrimination laws go both ways - and, of course, the employer is still dumb enough to tell this to that man's face.
    • Another inversion here, with a female employee who will bend over backwards for female customers, but is dismissive and rude towards male ones, including making up stories about them being rude to her (e.g. claiming the submitter was trying to get a refund for expired food he bought months ago, rather than warning them of long-expired food still on their shelves).
    • This woman has had to deal with many home improvement stores that fall deep into this trope, so imagine how she feels once she finds a store that averts it. To top it off, said store is run by a woman, perhaps inverting the trope as well.
    • This registrar is a jerkass sexist won't register girls for the mall's sports activities (Soccer, Football and Hockey) but instead puts them into ballet and gymnastics because he thinks all girls like those and hate sports. What's worse, the organizer of these activities allows it because he only cares whether all of the activities have at least 9 kids attending each otherwise they be canceled, claiming it's fair and equal despite the fact the girls basically have no choice in what they get to do. It eventually backfires once a couple of Mama Bears, unhappy about the situation, organize a boycott, leading to most—if not all—of the activities being cancelled.
      • This registrar is better in this regard; his excuse is that every other girl signing up legitimately did want ballet, so he assumed this one wanted that too, and is quick to fix the mistake when she points out she wants to play football. Unfortunately, the organizer is just as sexist as the last example; he even talks as if the girl will end up dropping off the team immediately, even after being shown video evidence of her liking the game and being very, very good at it. At least the organizer (albeit grudgingly) allows her the chance to try. Also, this incident takes place in Darwin, so they may have been talking about Australian Rules Football, which is a very rough sport.
      • Rounding out the possibilities, this registrar is a jerkass sexist who, without the knowledge of the parents, sign up girls for ballet and gymnastics despite their requests, and even threatened physical violence on a woman who complained about it. Unlike the previous two stories, the organizer is not happy when he finds out, and ends up firing the clerk on the spot and correcting the misplacements that he can. (Bonus points: Apparently, the clerk was later arrested on sexual assault charges for a different incident.)
    • This nurse repeatedly reminds a patient that an operation will make her sterile, ignoring the patient repeatedly saying that she was already sterile due to the condition she's getting the operation for. Eventually the nurse snaps and says that the patient's godly duty as a woman is to have children. At least the nurse was kept away from the patient when the incident was reported to the surgeon.
    • This waitress actually cuts a female sailor's military ID in half because she thinks women can't serve in any capacity in the Navy and it's therefore a fake ID. The customer ended up getting the meal free instead, along with a coupon for another free meal at a later time, while the waitress was chewed out by the manager over the incident.
    • The new manager in an aerospace company dismisses what he thinks is an overpaid secretary. Nope, she was the only one with the applied mathematics skills necessary for the group to do the work... and the CEO, once it became known why certain projects had been stalled for months, tore into the supervisor before firing him.
    • This car dealer who assumes that the wife of a pair is only interested in the aesthetic features of the car, and is subsequently surprised when not only is she the one doing the test driving, she proceeds to rattle off everything that's wrong with the car afterwards.
  • Stealing the Credit: A hallmark of bad managers, like this one.
  • Stealing from the Till: An extreme example can be found here, involving a manager and his daughter embezzling from the financial services company they both work at for over six months, trying to get another employee to take the fall for them, and finally finding themselves in jail for stealing from multiple businesses they had worked for.
  • Stock Scream: A Wilhelm Scream turns up in this one for reasons unexplained.
  • Stock Yuck: This pizza place worker makes the assumption that teenagers ordering a pizza with anchovies is a prank call - and, in typical Not Always Working fashion, is unnecessarily rude about it, which gets him fired within five minutes.
  • Stupid Evil: This boss proudly bullies the disabled employee in front of the employee's ACAS representative.
  • Stupid Sexy Flanders: Discussed here, including the sexual-orientation flip.
  • Surrounded by Idiots: This poor cashier.
  • Suspect Is Hatless:
    • This worker at a nursing home, who describes a resident as the one who "has gray hair and glasses, and is sitting in a wheelchair." A coworker points out that that description doesn't narrow it down very much.
    • The only clue the submitter is given on the identity of a secret shopper is "she's a lady".
  • Suspiciously Specific Denial: Right here.
  • Sustained Misunderstanding:
    • "Oh... I didn't know they let Nazis donate."
    • This fast food worker continues to believe the customer wanted a latte despite both the customer and the manager saying otherwise.
    • A teenager buying diapers for her new baby sibling gets harassed by a nosy cashier who assumes that she is a teen mom and refuses to listen to her explanation otherwise. It's bad enough that the teen winds up going to a different store to buy the diapers.
  • Teasing from Behind the Language Barrier: This submitter's uncle uses this to take care of a persistent caller that kept bothering his nephew:
  • The Tape Knew You Would Say That / Improbably Predictable: A former telemarketer encounters another telemarketer working from the same script he used at his old job. So he joins in.
  • That Came Out Wrong:
  • That's What She Said: Attempted by a female worker here: "God, that took forever! It felt so good to finally shove some meat in there!"
    • This one comes from a blood clinic worker, with the customer saying that he would've gone for it had the worker not done so.
  • They Just Dont Get It:
    • Stories under the "Ignoring/Inattentive" (formerly "Not Listening") tag tend to be cases of this.
    • Taken to the extreme here. The caller tries to get her problem reassigned to another IT Manager, because the current one is on vacation. The helpdesk person repeatedly says that the away manager is already assigned to the case, and not once seems to understand what the caller is actually saying.
    • And here too. Apparently for these workers (and these workers as well), "I don't want to buy the wine" means "I don't want to show you my ID, give me the wine".
      • This worker goes even further, construing the laws for "You can't sell alcohol to minors" and "You can't sell alcohol to an adult buying on behalf of minors" to mean "You can't sell alcohol to an adult who happens to be accompanied by minors, even if the alcohol is clearly for the adult".
    • In response to a customer who has a malfunctioning debit card (on a Sunday, while on vacation), the bank employee not a few times says "just don't spend money", not seeming to get that this isn't an option, especially for that customer at that time.
    • This boss really doesn't seem to understand that when an employee quits, that's it; they don't work there anymore.
    • From this story: "..as I have explained, I am unable to pay any more at present." "I understand, but why are you not paying a greater amount?"
    • Here is a tobacco example similar to the liquor examples above.
    • Part 2: an idiot/Jerk Ass cashier who needs to have their manager called in for basic math skills.
    • This employee really wants to work (read: get paid for) Mondays even though the store in question is not open on Monday.
    • This company had to deal with a bill collector that continued asking for someone who never had anything to do with them despite filing multiple complaints with the FCC. Even after the boss gave them permission to mess with the caller, they still had to prank the collector no less than six times before they finally gave up.
    • Apparently "I don't have a bag" is too complicated a concept for this girl to understand.
    • This teller keeps telling a customer they have to remove their sunglasses, not understanding when the customer repeatedly tells them that they're not actually sunglasses.
    • This clerk insists on giving a customer five dollars back for a one-dollar DVD return and taking one dollar for a five-dollar DVD purchase. The customer just accepts it (and gives the extra change to charity) after the clerk fails to understand the problem after it is pointed out to her two times.
    • This security guard decides that a family helping their young daughter put on a jacket means that they stole it. It doesn't matter that it's stained, has no tags, and is a brand the store does not sell. When the guard finally gets that it was not stolen, several hours later, he asks a coworker "why didn't you tell me?", when said coworker did, numerous times.
    • This demonstrator seems to believe that a family claiming they don't have carpeting on their floor means they don't have a floor at all.
    • "I suppose if they misheard 'ice water' as 'affogato,' mishearing "I'm allergic" as "I'd like extra" isn’t too far of a stretch, but still..."
    • The conversation in this story was apparently a daily occurrence for the submitter.
    • This clerk at a jewelry counter can't seem to understand how a wind-up watch works without a battery. Despite having it explained to them by multiple people.
    • This receptionist just doesn't get that the customer in question has not been getting bills for eight months because a.) they moved from Connecticut to California, and b.) their old address was wrong in the system, so the bills were not forwarded, and keeps saying "you should just pay your bills when you get them, because we've been sending you bills for eight months".
    • For these employees, customers apparently have to specifically ask for lettuce and tomato to be added to their BLT sandwiches. That lettuce and tomato are in its name, right after the bacon that they did add, means nothing.
    • Likewise for this restaurant, where a BBQ bacon burger apparently does not come with bacon - and, to add insult to injury, the waitress the submitter asked about it charged extra for the "add-on" after getting them the bacon they were supposed to get in the first place.
    • This Indian Telemarketer doesn't seem to understand that the family he's repeatedly calling is not interested in what he's selling despite the numerous time they insult him and threaten to call the police. The Telemarketer finally stop after the police contacted his superiors.
    • Despite the US Navy telling their cooks to put meat signs on their food so their Arabic guests won't accidentally eat food that is against their religious beliefs, one cook doesn't understand why he has to put a sign on his Calicon corn despite the fact the dish contains pork.
    • These two tech support don't seem understand because the submitter new computer is a Mac that runs OSX, they cannot install Internet Explorer which is only available on Windows.
    • This employee refuses to believe that the 24 year old submitter has an unconventional middle name, screaming that she's been "lied to" even after the submitter explicitly states multiple times that the name in question is her middle name, not the first part of a hyphenated last name. The supervisor who scolds the employee and takes over notes that the employee always did this and was likely going to be let go because of that incident.
    • This submitter was suffering from excessive fatigue and oversleeping. The doctor, for whatever reason, decided his patient was clearly suffering from insomnia note  and needed to take over-the-counter sleep aids. "He's my ex-doctor now."
  • Too Dumb to Live:
    • This nurse downs an entire bag of pills, despite not knowing who they belong to or what they are for. Fortunately for her (and possibly unfortunately for the rest of us), they were mostly harmless lactose-intolerance pills, so no Darwin Award for her (at least, not yet).
    • These coworkers stop in the middle of a stairwell during a fire drill to take a selfie, endangering the people behind them as well as themselves. Had this been an actual emergency, photobombing their selfie (as the submitter suggested) would have been too light a reaction.
    • This guy has a nut allergy severe enough for him to take an Epipen to work everyday and thinks the reason for nearly dying after eating an ALMOND JOY! was that that it had coconut in it.
  • Unwanted Assistance: invoked
    • An optician has to bend the glasses to fit properly on the patient's face...then proceeds to unbend them so they'll fit in the hard case. Eventually the patient uses a paraphrase of the former trope name "Stop Helping Me".
    • This Cable Rep claims he/she can help the submitter but is being difficult in settling an unjustified shipping cost. The submitter asks for someone else to help her instead.
  • Vengeful Vending Machine: Yep, they exist.
  • Vetinari Job Security:
  • Wacky Cravings: The poster thinks this is going on in this story, and tries to warn the customer about the dangers. It turned out that while the customer's daughter is pregnant, she doesn't have a craving for mayonnaise — she's making deviled eggs for the baby shower.
  • Waif-Fu: Here.
  • Waxing Lyrical:
  • What Could Possibly Go Wrong?: The worst they can say is no.
  • Who's on First?:
  • Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: Well, spiders in this case. It scares the guy so much he Screams Like a Little Girl.
  • Why We Can't Have Nice Things: This company stopped giving "fools' errands" to new employees after one nearly cost them over £1800.
  • Workers Cannot Do Math:
    • Here are two people who don't understand fractions.
    • Here's one that doesn't understand subtraction.
    • Here's one who doesn't know how to convert a "recipe" for a quart of paint to a gallon.note 
    • “The new store in [city] just made $9,000 last week. That’s almost a million!” That's an epic case of Misplaced a Decimal Point, at best.
    • When a person fails to understand that 12 ounces are three quarters of a pound, it's somewhat understandable. When that person can't comprehend a fraction like "three quarters", it's this trope.
    • A dozen is twelve, but somehow these two never learned that.
      • Nor did this cashier.
      • This bakery doesn't understand that a half-dozen is six, either.
      • This submitter splits two dozen donuts between three boxes, to which the cashier tries to charge them for three dozen - apparently a "dozen" is simply however many donuts happen to be in a box, rather than a concrete number.
    • This sandwich shop worker doesn't understand what "cut it in half" means and has to be told to cut the sandwich into 2 pieces.
    • This lawyer cannot get a single printer to print a Word document - which turns out to be because he's telling the printers to print the fourth page of a document that only has three pages.
    • This coworker doesn't get that a drink which is three-thirds coffee would be all coffee.
    • This cashier doesn't know how "buy one, get one free" works.
      • This one, meanwhile, misunderstands the "buy" part and thinks the customer gets everything free.
    • The introduction to this story mentions that some of the interviews the submitter went to were doomed from the start, because they were looking for someone with five- to ten-years' experience with software that wasn't even two years old.
    • Same deal in this story, where the interviewer is looking for people with ten years' worth of work experience, but then refuses to hire the submitter who has double that, because he's not in his mid-20's and therefore cannot possibly know anything about computers. The submitter points out the ridiculousness of this as he's leaving by telling them "good luck finding someone who graduated at age 10".
    • This agent cancels a woman's tuition account because the woman didn't pay anything over the last two months, even when both the agent and the submitter plainly see that the woman's charges for those two months is zero dollars.
    • The submitter here gets an electric bill for £0.00. When he sends nothing, the company threatens to send bailiffs to recoup the amount of the debt, continually failing to understand that the bill is for "NAUGHT pounds and NAUGHT pence." It gets to the point that the submitter simply sends a check for £0.00 to satisfy the electric company.
  • Worst Aid: The "Medical Office", "Hospital", and "Health & Body" tags are full of doctor don'ts, nurse nuisances, and receptionist rejections.
    • This story is particularly cringe-worthy.
    • Sometimes, it pays to explain things to the doctor—the hospital goes into a wild goose chase over a nurse's incorrect diagnosis until the patient finally is able to talk to a doctor and tell them what's wrong. The doctor gets a major Oh, Crap! moment when the patient's description of the symptoms hits home—turns out the patient had cancer!
    • These paramedics state that an elderly woman is being "uncooperative" all while completely ignoring the woman's family's insistence that she only speaks Finnish.
  • Wounded Gazelle Gambit:
    • Inverted with this manager, who thinks an 8-months-pregnant cashier is faking a sickness. Turns out, it was very real.
    • In this story the submitter's manager reveals that a customer accused them of racially abusing him. It turns out that he (the customer) bullied the submitter when they went to school, and cried racism whenever the submitter complained. When the coworker's classmate vouches for the submitter, the manager immediately drops the complaint.
  • Wrong Genre Savvy: Quite a number of bosses and co-workers fall under this.
    • In this case, the manager believes he's in a Not Always Right story, handling a rude and aggressive customer. Turns out, he's in a Not Always Working story, with his waiter being mean.
  • Wrong Restaurant: Subverted in this story. A man goes into a vegetarian restaurant and orders a steak. The newly hired waitress (telling the story) has to inform him that as a vegetarian restaurant, they don't serve steak. But then the owner's daughter reveals that they do serve steak. It turns out she doesn't know what "vegetarian" means, and the owner doesn't have the heart to tell her - which leads to the restaurant closing down just weeks later after an actual vegetarian restaurant opened across the street.
  • You Are Already Dead: Discussed.
  • You Are Better Than You Think You Are: A coffee-shop employee gives a self-loathing coworker a pick-me-up this way, Drill Sergeant Nasty style.
    • Note that the narrator delivered it that way because they thought the "self-loathing" coworker was just whining to get attention, and given that it apparently worked they were likely right.
  • You Can't Miss It: This receptionist gives directions from the current doctor's office to the office of a specialist for people with color-blind vision...citing landmarks by color. Thankfully, once the patient spells out the problem, the receptionist finally seems to realize what they were doing wrong.
  • You Didn't Ask: A perfect demonstration of just how annoying this trope really is.
  • You Keep Using That Word:
    • The daughter of the owner of this restaurant doesn't know what the word "vegetarian" means.
    • Neither does this server. Though, given the circumstances, it's equally possible that he does know, but either doesn't know what counts as meat (since he claims chicken noodle soup and bacon have no meat), or is deliberately being an asshole to the vegetarian customer (since, given the above thought process, he ignores the customer's request to not add bacon to their dish and then insults them for complaining).
      Needless to say, we didn't tip well.
    • This worker makes the opposite of the usual mistake, extending the definition to include rice and beans.
    • Maybe here. It's possible the boss meant someone else was killed in the accident, but it's not clear.
    • This trainee pilot doesn't quite understand what the "mile high club" is.
    • This developer keeps using the wrong terms for a piece of software, and can't be convinced to use the correct ones. It's implied the developer uses a rather naughty term for the spinny thing that lets people know that something is loading (normally called a "throbber").
  • You Make Me Sic: This woman corrects a poorly-written comment from her manager.
  • Younger Than They Look: A doctor believes a 29-year-old woman to be in her mid-40s, accusing her of being afraid to own up to the possibility of going through menopause... And when he meets her later during her pregnancy, he berates her for being such at such an advanced age.
  • Your Cheating Heart: This guy was on the other end of this trope - his wife was sleeping with his boss, who promptly fired him when he discovered it.
  • Zillion-Dollar Bill: Nope, $2 bills exist.


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