WMG: Grand Unifying Guesses Haruhi Suzumiya
aka: Haruhi Suzumiya
What Koizumi was talking about when he mentioned the wars his organization was involved in
It started out with the cold war from Command and Conquer Red Alert in which Haruhi was dormant until she became Yuriko Omega. When the war ended the agents of Warehouse 13 locked away all of the weird tech and killed Haruhi, but she came back as Maria from Umineko. After the events of Higurashi and Umineko she died again and became the actual Haruhi. Occuring concurrently with the events of Mo HS
were the events of the Transformers movie, Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha, James Bond, Warehouse 13, most of the Resident Evil Videogames series, Silent Hill, Jurassic Park, and the X Files. Haruhi eventually finds out about the weird stuff, which causes her to erase everything except the IDSE, Bernkastel, and Lambdadelta, who are able to resist it by existing outside of reality. This rewrite puts in place the first Tiberium War, setting the stage for the second, third, and fourth. Kane got his info and his ability to cheat death from Bernkastel, while Lambdadelta supports GDI in another game between them, the Scrin are agents of a weakened IDSE, and Haruhi lies dormant for now. The Tiberium crystal is controlled and used as the fuel source for Armored Command Units and jump gates that allow colonization of the galaxy after Haruhi mindwipes everyone into forgetting the Scrin invasion. When the Earth Empire falls in the pre Supreme Command Universe Haruhi remakes the Scrin as the Seraphim and sets up The Way, incarnating as successive Aeon princesses. The IDSE creates the Cybrans while Lambdadelta and Bernkastel create the UEF. When black sun is fired Bernkastel betrays Lambadelta and opens a portal for Haruhi's Seraphim, while taking over QAI. Haruhi turns against the Seraphim but cannot destroy them in her current state but she does close the portal.
The following entities are other versions of Haruhi Suzumiya
, and by extension, either Christ (causes happiness) or the Demiurge (causes misery):
- Chuck Norris
- The Doctor
- Shinji Ikari. Of course!
- Konata Izumi
- Suzie Derkins (and, therefore, Marla Singer)
- I feel funny. I actually understood that. WMG-points for me, I guess.
- Minus (and, therefore, Anthony Fremont)
- The Snarl
- Sasami Kawai
- Tenchi, not Sasami. She is host to a lesser, named, Goddess (Tsunami), while Tenchi is getting power from a "connection" to a "higher deity".
- Phineas or Ferb
- Mick Foley represents another older, male example of Haruhi.
- Another male example is the Fourth Hokage.
- The Anti-Haruhi (and by extension, anti-christ) is Mandy.
- River Tam
- Strong Bad. Seriously, everything he imagines becomes real eventually. Trogdor, Stinkoman, Senor Cardgage...
- The Childlike Empress
- The Old Man of Wandering Mountain is Kyon.
- Brahma the Creator (see below.)
- On that note, the Composer.
- Morgan Freeman, seeing as he is also God.
- Amaterasu. Possibly?
- She's older than both Christ and Haruhi, so she's most likely a older version of them.
- The Heroine of Light
- Gordon Freeman. Adrian Sheppard (from Opposing Force) is the Anti-Christ.
- Eric Cartman
- Anti-Haruhis include
- Sari Sumdac.
- Kiva again (see voice actor theory below), she just doesn't know it. Thus, by extension, Haruhi is also a Time Lord (if such hasn't been proven already).
- The Muppet Babies' Nanny.
- Lillian Hale
- CACAME, GLORIOUS ELF KING OF THE DWARVES!
- Ken Jennings.
- Mayumi Thyme. "I am not interested in any ordinary fish."
- Mindy McConnell, after recreating the universe into a 1970s sitcom.
- Yukari Yakumo is more or less the ultimate incarnation of Haruhi. Her power can cause EVERYONE ELSE ON THIS LIST to have never exsisted.
- Alternatively, some of the above are not Haruhi, but instead are people who had her powers before Sasaki.
- Rozalin, after being reincarnated at level 1.
- Karin Sasamori. Even her methods of getting what she wants are identical.
- Claire Stanfield was the (thoroughly aware) incarnation of Haruhi. The "three years prior" event in which Haruhi came into her reality warping powers occurs exactly at the time of Claire's "death" (Which doesn't actually happen because Claire knows he can't die — he just decides he's been Claire long enough and wants to be Haruhi now instead).
- Rose Tyler The creation of Bad Wolf was also possibly the creation of Haruhi, but no one can say for sure.
- Dr. Insano
- Arale Norimaki. C'mon, there's an entire chapter where she tries every club the school has to offer, but declares them all boring. Does that ring any bells?
- Susan Foreman
- Carly Shay
- Ritsu Tainaka
- Stewie Griffin (revealed to be instigator of the Big Bang, at least in this universe in "The Big Bang Theory")
- Abed Nadir
- Pinkie Pie. The reason she assumes a darker hue when she's upset is due to the influence of Closed Space.
- Celestia and Discord would also fit for the Haruhi title.
- Maria Renard
- Squirrel Girl
- This Troper
- Lucy Pevensie
- Bella Swan
- The TARDIS: its explosion literally unmade the universe.
- Amy Pond: she can recreate the Doctor and all those destroyed from the Exploding Tardis through her subconscious.
Haruhi is Chuck Norris
Haruhi and Chuck Norris have their hands in everything.
The plot of Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne
is just an idle daydream in Haruhi's fancy, created and crushed in the blink of an eye as she searches for anything odd or interesting. This in turn means that she is none other than the Great Will itself.
- Or, Haruhi is actually a fictional character designed to personify the Pan-Fictional Cabal, who are the REAL manipulators of reality, as detailed in an above theory. Haruhi is just a red herring/mascot.
- That is blasphemy! Haruhi's the only one not being controlled by the Cabal.
- The Pan-Fictional Cabal are the fourth agency monitoring Haruhi. The reason they don't need to have an agent visible like the other three is that Konata is their agent, and she can monitor Haruhi secretly on television.
- Then, this means that Konata is the slider and hasn't been recruited into the SOS brigade because she slid out of Haruhi's universe.
- Pretty defective agent. She's too lazy to read the light novels, meaning that she's constantly behind. There's gotta be a second one...
Haruhi's Dimensional Sliders are, in fact, the Q... but Q are also aliens, time travelers, and
espers. At the same time. Aliens, time travelers, and espers like Yuki, Mikuru, and Koizumi were in fact wiped out by the Q in a fit of jealousy, trying to prove their supremacy to Haruhi, who subsequently joined their number and left a wave of chaos in her wake... hence the existence of every other alien race or strange outer space phenomena encountered in Star Trek
The Doctor, and by extent Time Lords, were created by Haruhi as the ideal being(s)
Time Lords are aliens. Time lords are espers. Time Lords are time travelers
. The doctor has been known to slide from time to time. We are obsessed with both time lords and Haruhi here on this wiki. It all adds up!
Haruhi is the heart of that world
as in Kingdom Hearts
. The Celestials that the ESPers fight are a form of Heartless
, as they are called into being by Haruhi's negative emotions, and it's stated that if they are allowed to exist long enough the world will be destroyed. Closed space is akin to the sealed area in Hollow Bastion that required the princesses of heart to open. Kyon is a keyblade bearer, but has not physically manifested his Keyblade yet. The event three years ago was when the world was linked, and the natural barriers around it fell.
If everyone is everyone else and they are all Haruhi timelords that live in computer simulated Evangelion spinoffs then this has to be true.
And so are all ther other wikis.
Haruhi is enthusiastic, is so obsessed with the Awesome
that she ignores the normal, has made mass from nothing, and puts the Rule of Cool
before the Laws of Physics, like Spiral Energy does. Haruhi, therefore, is the equivalent of the world of Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann
Orihime is emotionally fragile, holds the Powers of God in her hands but acts weak, is only useful when there are others around, and appears to generate AT Fields. Orihime, therfore, is the equivalent of the world of Neon Genesis Evangelion
- Orihime isn't Shinji. Her cooking proves that.
- Haruhi's powers are like Spiral Energy — offensive, limitless, and running off enthusiasm. Orihime's powers are like AT Fields — defensive, shield-like, and usually limited to the person's reach. Thus, Haruhi's powers are from Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, and Orihime's powers are from Neon Genesis Evangelion.
They don't call it The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
They are the God-Emperor of Mankind
and a Time Lady
All the characters who are really Time Lords are that way because Haruhi Suzumiya wanted them to be.
It makes sense given her interest in seeking out aliens and time-travellers... Time Lords are both!