Ted and John get revenge on the school bully by pretending to be his Disappeared Dad. Blaire and Susan try to convince Matty to get a colonoscopy.
- Bestiality Is Depraved: Matty's dark secret from Vietnam. He jacked off a dog.
- Did Not Think This Through: When Ted and John recruit an actor to show up at Clive's birthday party and pretend to be his dad, they don't consider that Clive's mom would be at the party and will recognize that the actor is not Clive's father. This is exactly what happens.
- Disappeared Dad: Clive grew up without a father. Ted and John try to prank him by calling him pretending to be his dad, but quickly realize they went too far and become fully-fledged father figures.
- Driven to Suicide: After Ted and John's prank, Clive attempts suicide by overdosing on Flintstones vitamins.
- My God, What Have I Done?: Ted and John gleefully prank call their bully Clive and pretend to be his long lost father but immediately become horrified when they see one of their calls leaves the poor boy running in away in tearful hysterics. realizing they went too far. During school, they still feel genuinely horrible for what they did to Clive, even after all the bullying he put them through. When they learn he attempted suicide, they spend the rest of the episode trying to make up for him by helping him in life, even disguising themselves as fully-fledged father figures to him for real.
- Noodle Incident: Whatever happened to Matty in Vietnam that he's afraid to accidentally talk about during his colonoscopy. Subverted in that later we find out that he jacked off a dog.
- Paper-Thin Disguise: Worried that Clive will recognize them at the restaurant they told him to meet his dad, they wear suits and fake mustaches, this is especially ridiculous because Ted is a living teddy bear.
- Parental Substitute: Ted and John become father figures towards Clive, and he eventually accepts them as this.
- Properly Paranoid: Matty convinces Blaire to sneak into the operating room with him for his colonoscopy, worried that the doctors will talk and that the procedure will be sexual for them despite her insistence that they'd Seen It All. When the colonoscopy starts, Blaire overhears the doctors saying this.
- Shout-Out:
- Ted and John watch The A-Team on TV.
- Clive has a Child's Play 3 poster in his room.
- Suicide by Pills: Clive tries to kill himself this way after Johnny and Ted's prank. It doesn't work, primarily because he chose Flintstone vitamins to do it.
- Totem Pole Trench: When Ted and John try to shoplift a Sega Genesis for Clive's birthday, they wear a trench coat with Ted on top. It backfires since John can't see where he's going and they end up bumping into everything.
- Your Mom: Ted insulting Clive's mom angers Clive so much that he gives Ted a Swirlie.
