Falconetti (David Patrick Kelly): He couldn't handle that I won Claire and he didn't! I was sleepin' with her every night, doin' it with her every night...
Spoony: I like to picture Marion having sex, but the mental image of him being there really ruins it.
"How the fuck do you always have, like, two good-looking girls who want you? You're the most hideous fucking chud I've ever met, and you always have a pair of girls fighting over you."
— Randal, Clerks II
"When the girl looks like that and her husband's so fat, that's immoral..." (To the tune of "That's Amore")
— A gondolier seranades The Simpsons
"You mean a chubby, unattractive male gets a saucy, hot as hell female? *Laughs* In what media?"
Eddie: What do you see in him?
Jessica Rabbit: He makes me laugh.
Ben: So, Gayle and Jerry?
Chris: I've thought about it a lot, there's no logical explanation.
"I am good-looking enough for both of us, I theenk!"